I know this is short and rather hurried in my opinion but I needed to write something to help get my mind off of...well if you've read DH you know. I haven't read it but I know a few things that greatly upset me. I still don't know a lot, I still want to read the book but I can't afford it and couldn't wait for the library so I just had to know who was going to...well you know.
Anyway, the next chapter will be full of stuff and there will be more explanations alter on but as I said I just had to write this. Hope you like. Please review.
By the way, I am thinking we can all agree that this has offically become AU.
"Do you want kids someday, Moony?"
Remus looked at Sirius with raised eyebrows, not quite sure he heard right "Er…what?"
"Do you want kids someday?" Sirius repeated
"Why, do you?"
Sirius sighed and leaned back "Maybe, it's just one of those things I've been thinking about"
"Well," Remus put down his book "it certainly would be fulfilling but how do you figure we go about getting them? I suppose we could adopt…"
"Yeah" Sirius shrugged "but I think it would be nice to have our own kids. I mean I don't think your dad would mind if the Lupin line continued."
"Sirius" Remus sounded slightly worried "having children of our own would require a woman or it's otherwise impossible and I mean impossible."
"I know that. I've been thinking about that too-maybe, someday we'll meet a pair of lesbians who also want their own children and it'll all work out somehow."
Remus rested head on Sirius shoulder "You really want children?"
"Just something I've been thinking about"
"Well, we'll see what happens then." Remus picked up his book again.
"What're you reading?"
"Hmm? Oh, it's about the theory of alternate realities"
"What's that mean?" Sirius looked at the words
"For every decision or possible decision we make a new and different reality is created"
"So" Sirius said as he processed this "does that mean there's a reality say, where we never got together?"
"Quite possibly"
Sirius put his arm around Remus "Well then, remind me never to go to that one- I can't imagine us not ever being together."
"Neither can I," Remus cuddled closer and decided the book could wait.
"So, what're we going to do?" Julius asked as he and Orion snuggled.
"I want to spend the rest of my life with you Julius and I think I know how"
It wasn't exactly difficult for Orion to lie to who he was forced to call 'wife'. Granted, for the plan to work he had to tell his family about the cancer-the lie part was that he told them that the Healers said that it would be better if he spent his last days in the fresh country air. Orion moved in with Julius and they were happy for awhile-the Black family tree registers Orion dying in 1979. Oh, yes and Julius disappeared without a word to anyone not even his son. (We'll leave these two for now and focus on our favourite puppies but don't worry, we'll find out more about them later on)
Sirius brother, Regulus also died in 1979-apparently he had tried to leave the Death Eaters. Sirius wasn't quite sure how he felt about that-ah, well he didn't like to dwell in the past either.
James and Lily were married almost immediately after graduation in 1978 and Remus and Sirius got a place together with the gold Sirius had been left by his uncle, Alphard. Except for the fact that they had almost constant work for the Order and barely had time for fun (of course Sirius found kicking Death Eater ass was fun) they were as happy as was possible during those dark times.
In July of 1980 James and Lily had a son, Harry and Sirius and Remus were godparents. Oh, they still had plans for their own family someday but they decided that it would wait till after this whole thing with Voldemort was done with. Unfortunately that seemed like it wasn't going to happen. During the course of the year, Sirius and Remus seemed to grow apart. There were those in the Order that couldn't trust Sirius because of his family and even more who couldn't trust Remus because he was a werewolf. These misgivings got to both canines and to James. Of course James trusted Sirius above all others but Remus he couldn't quite be sure about.
1981, sometime before Halloween
Sirius paced in front of James and Lily in their living room "James, I've thought it over-I don't think I should be your secret keeper."
"Why not? Sirius, you're the best one for the job, there's no one I trust more than you."
Sirius sat down heavily in a chair facing the couple "If I was your Secret Keeper that would mean choosing between you and Remus and I cannot do that. If it came down to Voldemort torturing me and it was between dying to protect you and not leaving Remus alone I don't know what I'd do. I know Voldemort would kill me either way but…you understand don't you?"
"I do" Lily said suddenly "even if he doesn't," she indicated her husband "I told him not to ask you. There's nothing wrong with using Professor Dumbledore."
James furrowed his eyebrows "Yeah, but Sirius is the obvious choice"
"Exactly" Sirius stood up and began pacing again "what if Voldemort decided to use Remus to get me to talk, like threatened to kill him? I can't take that chance besides everyone knows I'm your best mate, Voldemort will come after me. I can lead him away and as long as I don't have to choose between you and Remus I'll be able to concentrate enough to not be killed. Anyway, I have a solution"
James sighed "Dumbledore's too obvious too"
"Not Dumbledore, use Peter-Voldemort will never suspect that you'd use someone like Peter, everyone knows Peter can hardly defend himself."
James snapped his fingers "I've got it, we'll use Peter but everyone will still believe we're using you. It's the perfect ruse, I'm glad I thought of it"
Sirius, Lily, and even baby Harry who was in his mother's arms looked at James as if to say "Uh…what?"
It however proved not to be the perfect ruse.
Remus had no idea about the switch but on Halloween he felt that something was wrong when Sirius left for "Order work".
"When will you be home?" Remus asked as Sirius pulled on his coat and stepped outside.
"As soon as I can" Sirius pulled Remus into a passionate but rather short kiss "I love you, Remus" he said huskily as he pulled away.
"I love you too, Sirius. And there better be more of that when you get home"
Sirius smiled, gave Remus one last peck on the cheek and got on his motorbike. The last thing Remus heard him say as he flew out of sight was "As soon as I can, Moony."
It wasn't until the next day that he had heard what happened and Remus felt as if his whole world dropped from underneath him. He had lost all four of his best friends one way or another in the course of twenty-four hours. How could Sirius do this? Remus became so distraught that he could not recall what happened between November 1981 and January 1983. Eventually though he came to his senses and figured (after several suicide attempts which were always somehow thwarted because Dumbledore always managed to show up right when Remus was about to end it) that he should at least try to live.
On the very same summer's day when Remus read in the Daily Prophet that Sirius had escaped Dumbledore came calling with a job offer.
He should have gone to Remus, Sirius knew that now. He shouldn't have gone after Peter by himself. The thing was Sirius had a problem with rage and he had been so upset that James was dead, that it had been essentially his fault (in his opinion) that he just wasn't thinking. He should have gone to Remus and Dumbledore and told them that he wasn't the Secret Keeper-that Peter was and Peter had betrayed them.
But now, Sirius was in Azkaban for something he didn't do. Of course he blamed himself but still he knew he was not the one who turned traitor. He knew he was innocent but everyone thought he was guilty and what killed him the most was that Remus thought he was guilty. Remus, the love of his life thought he was evil.
Finally, he found out that Peter was alive that he was in disguise that he would be at Hogwarts where Harry was. Well, Sirius be damned if he didn't find a way to fulfil his duty as godfather. He'd get out of here, stop Peter, save Harry and Remus would love him again.
Remus took the job, he would have taken the job for free, and someone had to look after Harry. After all, Remus was technically one of his godfathers, he just wished that he could take care of Harry but Dumbledore explained that he was safer in Lily's sister's home.
All year Remus battled with himself-should he tell Dumbledore that Sirius was an animagus or should he not? He was trying to convince himself that Sirius was using Dark Magic to get in the castle but deep down he knew how Sirius was doing it. He didn't need Dark Magic, all Sirius needed was his ability to transform and his knowledge of the secret passageways. So then why didn't Remus find Sirius (and he was fairly certain he could guess where he was hiding) and confront him? If Remus allowed himself to admit it he figured he was still pushover prefect Remus. Of course he didn't allow himself to admit it.
Other than these inner conflicts, Sirius's break-ins, Snape's intimidation and Harry's dementor lessons the year went fairly well. It was now the day before Gryffindor's match against Ravenclaw. Remus allowed himself to be excited-the last time he had seen a Quidditch match was when James won Gryffindor the cup in their seventh year. That had been a good match, spectacular…but no, he won't allow himself to think about it, it would only bring back memories he couldn't afford to think about.
He took some chocolate from his rather extensive supply. He chose one of his favourite muggle brands-Toberlone. Eating the honey infused chocolately goodness made Remus think that most people might be spending their hard earned money on better clothes rather than candy but Remus had been through three Chocoholics Anonymous Programs with no results. At least he wasn't an alcoholic like his father had been though he did occasionally enjoy chocolate liqueur. Come to think of it, that sounded perfect right about now, but before he could get to it a greasy scent hit his nose that was soon accompanied by a knock on his door.
Remus sighed heavily and went to the door and opened it a crack "Go away, Severus"
Right so then, it might be a while before next chapter as I intend it to be longer. Just remember that this will HAVE A HAPPY ENDING. Show of hands...who else is upset with HPDH? Well, I think I need chocolate. -TTFN, Lady A
