Meanwhile, in an alternate universe, Giga Bob sat at his computer, typing up another chapter of Obscurus Lupa Wins The Olympics. In this chapter, Lupa would team up with Rinry and Film Brain, and they would go and stop World War II. He briefly considered revealing Hitler as an evil Nietzsche from another alternate dimension, but decided against it. What kind of twist would that be?

Suddenly, Phelous!

"Hey you! Being a meta Canadian guy is my shtick!" Phelous jumped out of Giga Bob's computer monitor and uppercutted him, knocking Giga Bob into space. Phelous then tapped into his previously-unmentioned conjuration powers and summoned a tower of clones of himself, climbing it in record time and knocking Giga Bob back into his house. Fortunately, since he was writing the story, Giga Bob had plot armor to the max, and survived atmospheric re-entry.

"What did I do?" Giga Bob whined, crying extremely unmanly tears.

"You wrote that horrible Hans Von Hozel style fic!" Phelous shouted. "You made Sponby and Benzair rape me and Lupa's dead, cold corpses!"

"It was a parody!"

"I'll show you a parody! ARROW TO THE KNEE!" Phelous conjured a bound bow and shot Giga Bob in the knee. Giga Bob's plot armor failed because of dramatic convenience, and to add insult to injury, it hit him in his bad knee.

"Damnit!" Giga Bob was still crying. "Now I can't write fanfics anymore, because I took an ar-"

"DON'T FINISH THAT!" Phelous took Giga Bob's good leg and ripped it right out, then bludgeoned him to death with it. Once he was done, Phelous grabbed Giga Bob's computer and defenestrated it.

"Phelous noooo!" Lupa jumped out of the inactive monitor.

"Gee, I sure was uncharacteristically angry for a bit there." Phelous said, returning to his usual deadpan. "I guess he's still controlling us on some level."

"Sucks to be you, Phelous!" Lupa laughed. "See, I'm the awesome Mary Sue wish fulfillment character, and you're the terrible out-of-character sidekick who's gonna die to set up the author's preferred ship!"

"Oh, really? I'm gonna die?" Phelous snarked.

"Yep. Suddenly, I'm in love with the Makeover Fairy." Lupa said. "No. No, that would be retarded. At least go for a het ship, please?"

"No!" Another version of Giga Bob, decked out in awesome futuristic plot armor, teleportaled in. "I will ship you with whomever or whatever I please! For this is Obscurus Lupa Wins The Olympics, and I am God! Now you are in love with Lloyd!"

"Why?" Lupa asked. "If you're going to ship me, I at least need some motivation."

"Uhhh..." Giga Bob scratched his head. "Okay, you got me. Wanna have a beer?"

"Hell yeah!"

Giga Bob opened his fridge and pulled out a six-pack. He threw it in a bucket of ice on a table that was totally there before, and they sat down and had a drink.

Lupa glanced at Giga Bob's movie shelf. "Uhh... 'I Was Kidnapped By Lesbians From Outer Space'? 'I Need To Fart 5'? 'High School Musical!' You're demented!"

"Says the person who reviews bad movies for a living." Giga Bob shot back. "Besides, I only set up that shelf so that you would comment on it, showing my nerd cred by referencing a webcomic that's not actually a movie, and a prequel of a porno from another terrible fanfic."

"You crafty bastard."

"No, not really." Phelous said. "Why the hell are we even here in the first place? You were gonna write something about World War II or something, right?"

"Actually, I already did." Giga Bob said. "But there's a person doing a dramatic reading of this fic, and I want them to suffer through two more chapters of my horrible writing." (Seriously though, I'm honored that anyone would read this fic, much less read it dramatically on Youtube. You're awesome, SuperFunTimeAwsomeo and Tehblackarachnid!)

"Whatever." Phelous said dismissively. "Why don't you just end the fic and go back to whatever you do during the day?"

"Because I don't do anything during the day! My life is Obscurus Lupa Wins The Olympics 24/7! I really... really... wish I had a job..." Giga Bob started crying into his beer.

"God, you're such a man-child." Lupa chuckled a bit. "And you're making us laugh at you to get a few sympathy points from the audience. Way to go."

"I know! I'm horrible..."

Phelous chucked his beer at Giga Bob's head, knocking him out cold.

"Come on, Lupa. Let's get out of here before he tries making out with you or something." Phelous teleported away, and Lupa followed.

They appeared on a grassy field in the middle of the night. The moon loomed above them, and it was visible getting larger and larger... or closer and closer, as it were.

"What the hell is this?" Lupa asked. "This is not my beautiful house!"

"Plot contrivance!" Phelous said.

"I'll show YOU plot contrivance!"

Hundreds of glowing red eyes peered at them from the shadows. They slowly started creeping toward the two, revealing that they were all human - or, were human. They still had the basic shape of a human, but the lack of fresh blood had degenerated them into long-limbed, fanged abominations.

"Vampires." Lupa said. She reached into her cleavage and pulled out a stake. "Good thing I always come prepared."

She threw the stake at one of the vampires, hitting it directly in the heart. Unfortunately, these vampires were different, and lacked the weakness to stakes. Lupa tried throwing a steak instead, bit the cut of raw meat flopped uselessly upon hitting one of the fanged ones. This only served to stir them into a feeding frenzy.

"Good job!" Phelous said. He conjured some garlic and silver crucifixes, which held them at bay for a moment, but not a second more. All the while, the moon kept creeping closer, threatening to destroy them all.

Lupa tried throwing holy water, but she didn't have any hearts. So she ripped out Phelous' heart and used it as fuel for her subweapon; the holy water actually did damage, burning a few of the vampires into ash. Phelous reappeared.

"What was that for?" Phelous said angrily. Ignoring him, Lupa grabbed another heart and threw more holy water. She kept repeating this act until most of the vampires were gone; unfortunately, the cries of the dead vampires had attracted more of them.

"Quick, Phelous! We need more firepower!" Lupa said.

"Huh? Aren't you still the God Mode Sue or something? Shouldn't you be able to just wipe them out by twitching your eyebrow or something?"

"Nope!"

Phelous sighed. He reanimated all of his clone corpses, and they linked up to form MegaPhelous! And Lupa formed the head, upgrading it to MegaLupalous, with Type-V equipment! They sprayed holy water all around, drenching and killing a ton of vampires. Lupa focused light from the full moon, directing it as a beam of light and vaporizing even more vampires.

But they weren't dumb. They could learn. The surviving vampires linked up too, forming a mega-vampire. And several of these mega-vampires linked up to each other, forming a mega-mega-vampire.

"Bullshit! I call bullshit!" Lupa shouted. "That's just not fair!"

"Fools!" the mega-mega-vampire said. "This world is about to die! We will put you under our thrall and escape to another world, where we will gorge our stomachs until they burst!"

"Nope! Come on Phelouses, let's use our finishing attack! MEGA! LUPALOUS! DAAAAAAAAA HOOOOOOOOOWLING!"

The moon cracked like an eggshell. A huge-ass werewolf descended from inside the moon, crushing the mega-mega-vampire with its foot. It then threw the remnants of the moon into Counter-Earth, where the vampires originally came from; the moon destroyed Counter-Earth, ending the threat of these particular brand of vampires forever.

"Well that was rather anti-climactic." Phelous said. The werewolf was chowing down on his now-unneeded corpses.

"Nope!" Lupa said. They both laughed, and they held each other until the sun rose. Then, they teleported away, into yet more adventures...