Chapter Eleven: Black, White and Green

Her mind was reeling when she got back into the dorm. She flew into her room and threw her things onto her bed angrily, clenching her fists. "Ugh!"

"Elphaba?" She hadn't even noticed Galinda when she'd walked in, too absorbed in her inner anguish. The blonde was sitting at her desk with a pen in hand. "What's wrong?"

"I can't even explain it," she muttered. Fiyero hadn't given her words for it, so how could she? When he'd touched her, brought her close to him, she'd felt the sweetest sensations shivering through her body. And when he'd kissed her, she'd never known a feeling so good in her life. But that was beside the point. Or was it?

"Did something happen with Fiyero?"

"Why do you always think it's him?" Of course, she was right.

"Because no one else can get you so worked up, Elphaba," the young woman said gently. "He has an effect on you."

"That's for sure." She remarked.

"Then what happened?" Galinda got up and sat down on her bed, directly across from Elphaba. "Did he say something hurtful?"

"I wish it were that black and white."

"It never is, though, is it?"

"Not at all."

"Tell me about it, Elphaba."

She examined Galinda's face, wondering about her motives. But in that moment, Elphaba realized all she ever did was question motives, and maybe this once she should just let it go. "Well, you were right. It was Fiyero."

"So he is your boyfriend."

"No. But… oh, this is a long story."

"We've got time."

"Well, our parents have a relationship. His mother is dating my father. That's how we know each other. We only met a few weeks before we came out here."

"Wait, so if you two…"

"Right."

"People wouldn't approve."

"At all. But I don't want him, Galinda. At least, I don't think I do. He's a bit of a lady's man. I'm not that kind of girl."

"The way he looks at you, I don't think he expects you to be. He practically worships you." Galinda observed.

"Really?" Worshipped? And why was Galinda always noticing these things? And, more concerning, why in Oz did she care?

"You are oblivious!"

"He doesn't even know what he wants, Galinda. He couldn't put into words what he wanted from me. How am I supposed to respond to that?"

"You have a good point there. What if he had just asked you out, though? Would you have agreed?"

"Probably not."

"You don't like him?"

The question had never been put to her like that before. She'd thought about if she could, even if she should want to be with him. But she'd never once considered her feelings plain and simple. Perhaps that was because when she was around him, she didn't know how to explain her feelings, and she wasn't fond of not being able to dictate things. "I might a little."

"So then why wouldn't you?"

"Our parents. Him. Me. There's so much more going on than just how I feel about him."

"But those things don't matter, not in the end, Elphaba."

"And what if he just wants…?"

"Wait until he can tell you what he wants. I'm not telling you to just jump into bed with him! But if you like him, Elphaba, then you should see where it goes. Have you never dated a boy before?"

Elphaba shook her head.

"Well, I can understand being a bit apprehensive, but college is a time for experimentation. You should do what you want. You need to stop considering everyone else. Since I've met you, all I see you doing are things you're only doing because other people want you to. The only thing you do that you want to do is studying. There's more to life than that."

"I feel like I've heard this before." Because Fiyero had said something eerily similar when they'd met.

"Maybe you should think about it, then."

She nodded. "Thanks, Galinda."

"Anytime."

That evening, the two girls were sitting silently at their desks when Fiyero showed up at their door. "Elphaba, can we talk?" He leaned on his arm in the doorway.

Galinda raised her eyebrows at looked over at Elphaba. "I can leave, if you need."

Elphaba only nodded at her roommate. "Thank you."

Galinda grabbed her bag and headed out the door. "You had better behave," she said to Fiyero on her way.

As the door shut behind him, he gave Elphaba an amused look. "What on earth does that mean?"

"It means she knows your track record." Elphaba said simply.

"Elphaba, you focus too much on that." He said, sitting on her bed. "Come here."

She meandered over to the bed, but did not sit down. "Fiyero, I don't know what there is to talk about when you don't know what you want from me."

He reached up and grabbed her hand. "I do know, though. I shouldn't have said anything to you without thinking about it, but I have now. Let me say what I need to say."

She sat down beside him. "Go ahead."

"I don't know how to do this. I realize that. But it occurs to me that no one ever really knows and we just figure it out. I want a relationship with you. I want to take you out. Yes, I want to be physical with you. But I want so much more than that. Give me a chance. I care about you."

"And how do you think our parents will handle this if I do?"

He bit his lip. "We won't tell them, at least not until we know this is working."

"Fiyero, I worry that we won't work, and what happens then? I mean, I'm not your kind of girl. I realize you think it means nothing, but it does make me uneasy knowing how experienced you are."

"I don't know how to fix that, Elphaba. I can promise you that we'll take this as slow as you need. I get overwhelmed when I touch you," as he said this, he reached and cupped her cheek, "and I think that's enough right now. I've never thought it was before, but with you things are different. I can't tell you why."

"This isn't just some line?"

"Why would I do that?"

He was right. She knew he could get what he wanted from girls who were much easier than she, and much more attractive. Which brought her to another question. "Why me, Fiyero?"

"Because you're incredible. And every time I'm near you, I lose myself in being around you. You pull me into this whirlwind and I never want out."

She hadn't expected that for an answer. It sounded so… warm and lovely. "I can't believe I'm actually considering this."

He smiled at that. "Don't be afraid. I'll be good to you."

"You know that I've never…"

"I figured as much. That's fine. We'll get to that when you want to get to it and no sooner. I promise."

She nodded. "I suppose we could try."

He brought her face closer to his and pressed his mouth against hers. At once, she responded, her hands naturally pressing against his chest, clasping at his shirt. She let him explore her mouth and almost moaned at just the feel of his tongue. When he drew back, he took a deep breath. "Then I'll take you out this weekend."

"I'll be looking forward to it."