AN: A huge thanks to all of my awesome reviewers! I love you all :)
Disclaimer: I don't own harry potter, or I wouldn't be sitting at this crappy computer and struggling with atrocious internet connection to bring my writings into the world.
Dear Mum and Dad. . .
Mother, I just wanted to say that-
Dear Mum and Dad, I'm really sorry-
Dear Mum and Dad, I'm not sorry and I hate you both, you stupid gits-
Hermione sighed. Every letter she was attempting to write to her parents was ending up in a scrunched, ink stained heap.
"Pah!", she grunted in disgust at her literary failure, pointing her wand and causing the heap of letters to burst into flames.
The babies kicked, and she wrapped an arm around her stomach.
"I'm sorry my loves,Grandmother and Grandfather dearest didnt take the news so well"
She was curled up in a chair in the sunshine next to the Weasley's orchard. Molly had insisted she get some fresh air, so Ron had lifted a couch and cushions out to underneath the apple trees so she could relax and watch Ron ride around the orchard.
She stretched and smiled as Ron soared to a halt next to her on his broomstick.
"For you", he laughed, holding out a rosy apple.
"Oh, how romantic!", Hermione gushed, faking a swoon.
"Anything for you, my little sugar dumpling!", Ron winked, clasping his heart and plopping down beside her.
"But enough of this wonderful romantic tom-foolery, how are you feeling today?", he asked in a more serious tone.
"Well, the Messers are taking delight in lightly battering my kidneys today", Hermione said with a mock grimace.
"So they're really kicking now?", Ron asked in awe.
"Here", Hermione said, placing one of his hands on her stomach.
Ron's face split into a huge grin.
"That's so amazing", he whispered, rolling up her shirt to lightly kiss her belly.
"How much longer to go?", he asked with a touch of impatience.
"Four more, and im already huge", Hermione frowned, "I'm getting bigger every damn day; my waistline is gone and I'm still bloody starving"
"You're eating for three you know, and I still think you're beautiful", Ron said, rubbing her lower back.
"Will you still think I'm beautiful when I'm nine months pregnant and massive?"
"I thought you were beautiful when you had huge front teeth and bushy hair", snorted Ron
"And I thought you were beautiful when you were bitching about sandwiches and had dirt all over your face", Hermione retorted.
"You're bloody adorable, you know that? Come on Granger, let's go up to the house, mum wanted to show us something. Probably booties"
Hermione laughed and heaved herself to her feet.
"Come on fatty"
"Sod Off", Hermione grumbled
"Come on beautiful carrier of my magnificent ginger children"
"A little more believable?"
"Come on, girl I've loved since she taught me the levitating charm in first year", admitted Ron in mock defeat.
"And thank god I taught you, you were saying it all wrong"
"I love you Granger"
"And I love you Weasley"
Laughing, Ron wrapped a hand around Hermione's middle and they began the short walk to the burrow.
"Ouch Ron, that was my foot"
"Just hold still while I find the light and-"
"Oww!"
"SURPRIIIIISSE!"
Hermione blinked in the sudden light to find a group of people standing in the Weasley's kitchen, which had been smothered in pale green streamers and balloons.
"Its your baby shower!", said Ginny enthusiastically from where she stood with Harry.
"So we thought we'd really commemorate and invite Fred and George for some laughs", said Harry, laughing at Ron's red ears.
"We didn't know if we should make everything blue or pink, since you two are being gits and not telling us what sex the babies are, so we settled for green", grinned Fred from next to a stack of presents.
"Many happy wishes, and hopes that the next batch of twins can live up to Uncle Fred and Uncle George"
"Yes, well, er-", stuttered Ron.
"You sly dog, didn't think you had it in you" said Fred with a roguish grin.
Fred and George high-fived and cackled at Ron's red face.
"But really Hermione, congratulations for finally giving Mum grandkids, she'd all but give up on the males in this family", said George, patting her on the back.
"I have not!", said Molly, "Everyone have some cake and then we'll open the gifts"
Hermione smiled and joined the throng around the table.
"And George, get rid of those fireworks, you don't want to send the poor girl into premature labour!!"
AN: a brief, real life funny- R&H's conversation was inspired by a competition that my boyfriend have: come up with the most nauseating nickname. He's in the lead with 'sugar dumpling' :P
