"So what do you do for a living?" my dad was actually having a decent conversation with Cas while I sorted through a takeout menu I found while cleaning earlier. It was surprising he was this normal, and not drunk. I stand up to get a beer from the kitchen, and Cas's eyes follow me. It's not weird having him here like I feared it might. Instead I actually feel like him being here is going to be good for me.

Cas keeps me grounded.

I don't hear Cas's response to dad's question but I can imagine it being something nondescript, 'oh I just do a lot of things for people' or something like that.

I stand by the fridge for a bit, not really wanting to listen more to the annoying small talk my dad was trying to do, it was nice of him to try…it's just he's not good at things like that. I guess that's where I got it from. When I look up from taking a swig of my beer I see Cas coming my way and I smile, then I realize what I'm doing and I blush.

"You're dad wanted a beer."

"Shocking." Mines already almost more than half empty and I wonder when that happened, "Do you want Thai food?"

"Sure." He pops the top off his beer before leaning against the fridge with me, "You promise to tell me if you're not feeling up to this?" and by 'this' I figure he means the whole Lawrence thing.

"Sure." I kick my foot back against the fridge and stand up, "Promise." There're something in my voice, I hope Cas can't hear it… "You still like Thai food dad?" Cas follows me back into the living room and hands my dad his beer before he sits down on the other side of the room.

"Yeah, haven't had it in a while though." I call up the restaurant and order for everyone, the girl on the phone sounds young and timid, and when she tells me that they don't do delivery anymore she sounds scared enough to just hang up the phone. "You two kids go on and pick it up without me."

So we do. Cas gets in my car and I follow him out, "You know where you're going?"

It's nowhere near dark yet, so I grab my sunglasses from the consul and turn to give Cas a look. "Nothing ever changes in Lawrence, and besides, I use to go to the Thai place all the time with Michael."

"Oh."

"When I first changed schools, it was weird because it was still in the same town, only this one was for the richer kids. The people on the east side of town, as you can tell I'm in the middle so I was allowed to enroll. Anyways, the Thai place was new and so everyone had to be there, I had a part time job next door so that's where I got my food. That's where I met Michael actually."

"Oh."
"Would you stop saying 'oh' like that? It makes me feel like I'm a charity case."

"Fine Dean, what do you expect me to say to that? Oh wow that's so cool that you're telling me where you met your last ex who basically ruined you for relationships, wow great. I'm grateful for you having told me."

I slow down for a stop sign and look over at him, "I thought you liked when I got these things off my chest, I thought it was 'good for the soul' or some shit."

He looks down at the hem of his shirt and fiddles with the seatbelt end lying across his lap, "Yeah it is, ignore me."

"I told you that you didn't have to come down here and you said that you wouldn't hate me. So what the fuck is up?"

"Nothing."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Freaking child."

"What?" but I turn up the music to where I can pretend I don't hear him and I cruise through downtown until I find the right street. Everything is starting to bring back memories, that bench was where Michael first kissed me.

Over there under that tree was where he first told me that he thought I was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. I look over at Cas, sitting in the passenger seat. Right there was where he and I fought for the first time. It was about something stupid I'm sure, but he kept yelling and I didn't know yet that I wasn't suppose to fight back. Until he hit me. And I jumped out of the passenger seat while he was driving twenty miles an hour.

He stopped the car right away and he told me he would never do it again and he starred crying. It was too much so I forgave him. And so began my four months of hell.

"Is that is Dean?" Cas's voice snaps me out of my thoughts and I shake my head, "Yeah."