Author's Note: Please take a look at previous notes.
Thank you everyone for giving all of these snapshots a chance! I know some of the endings are frustrating and some of the stories may be sad, but thank you for looking at my sandbox of ideas and giving me some input.
This is the longest one I have and it took a while to get ready for posting—I still think it feels a little unbalanced at the end. I couldn't think of anything to give it more balance (besides more Etienne stuff) so I've posted as is. There's one more sitting on my computer that is fairly developed and almost ready to share. The rest are a paragraph here or there, or a piece of dialogue. So, anything after the next one is going to be recent thoughts or more work on those bits and pieces sitting about.
Let me know what you think. Enjoy!
XXXX
"Your findings are…astounding," Commander Etienne Martin said as he looked at T'Pol with wide eyes.
"It took years to establish the correct formulation Commander," T'Pol said as she stepped away from the readout. "I assure you it did not happen quickly."
"Well, I appreciate your tenacity Commander T'Pol," Etienne smiled at her. "You have just given my research a new start. Honestly, I had given up."
T'Pol nodded. "Science is, many times, a matter of technology catching up with the theories we establish."
Etienne smiled at the beautiful Vulcan woman before him. "I couldn't have said it better myself."
"Will you be joining the senior staff for dinner this evening?" T'Pol inquired.
"I would love to," Etienne smiled at her. "And I hope we can spend more time together before I get to Prius One."
"I would like your scientific input on a number of experiments we are conducting in the lab," T'Pol said as she turned off the screen and started to walk toward the exit with him. "Sometimes fresh eyes help."
"Agreed," Etienne smiled at her.
"Do you know how to get to your guest quarters?" T'Pol asked.
"I do, thank you," Etienne smiled. "I will see you at dinner?"
"18:00," T'Pol reminded him.
They parted ways, T'Pol walking back into the lab and Etienne toward the turbo lift.
When he got on the turbo lift Commander Tucker was already inside.
"Commander Martin," Trip greeted him.
"Commander Tucker," Etienne said before he stepped inside.
"Just coming from the lab?" Trip inquired.
"Yes, T'Pol is quite an amazing scientist," Etienne said as he turned toward Trip. "You are quite lucky to have her on board."
"Her work speaks for itself," Trip smiled at the man. "She runs a tight ship in Science."
"I can see that," Etienne said. "I'm interested to see what other experiments they have been working on."
"Anyone in the Science department would be happy to show you what they're working on," Trip said. "They are quite proud of their achievements. The most acclaimed Science team in space."
"T'Pol has invited to me to her lab for the next couple of days," Etienne said with a smile as the lift doors opened. "I am interested in finding out what other surprises she has in store."
Trip furrowed his brow slightly at his last comment, there was a slight oddness about it that he didn't like but he couldn't quite put his finger on.
"Good day Commander," Etienne said before he stepped off the turbolift.
"Have a nice day," Trip replied before the doors shut.
XXX
"Thank you for such an amazing dinner Captain," Etienne said as he reached for his dessert fork. "I cannot expect this level of cuisine at my next post."
"Chef is the best in Starfleet," Jon smiled at the amiable man who had joined them for dinner.
"I'd think scientists would be great cooks," Trip said as he reached for his coffee. "You know how to combine chemicals and work with heat, just transfer that knowledge to food and…"
"Scientists are generally too into their work to eat a lot of the time," Etienne laughed. "I have had to rescue many students from starvation who have lived in the lab for days collecting results."
Trip and Jon laughed at his joke and T'Pol nodded.
"We had a similar incident with Ensign Montoya," T'Pol added. "She became dehydrated because she didn't want to leave her Euphiaus plant for sustenance."
Etienne smiled broadly at her across the table.
"I imagine we have many stories to share," Etienne said.
"I imagine we do," T'Pol said with a nod.
"You aren't having cake," Etienne noted. "I believe it is vegetarian."
"No, no animal products in Chef's chocolate ganache cake," Jon chuckled before he took another bite.
"T'Pol likes to watch her sugar intake," Trip supplied.
"Smart," Etienne smiled at her. "I imagine, knowing Vulcan food, you were not exposed to much sugar as a child and generally find things too sweet."
"I do," T'Pol noted. "Humans seem to have a level of sugar tolerance that I do not possess."
"Especially Trip here," Jon said as he smiled at his friend. "Pecan Pie, Ice cream, Key Lime pie, chocolate…shall I go on?"
"And yet you manage to maintain a healthy body weight," Etienne said as he observed Trip.
"I work out everyday," Trip said. "Burn off the sugar with running."
"That, and you have an unusually high metabolism," T'Pol added.
"Good genes," Trip smirked.
Etienne nodded.
"So, how many scientists in this colony?" Jon asked, changing the subject.
"Seven," Etienne said. "In the next five years we'll go up to twenty but, right now, we're incredibly small."
"I guess that means everyone better be good at gettin' along," Trip noted.
"Yes, we have to have excellent interpersonal skills," Etienne smiled.
"Even on a ship like Enterprise, where out numbers are greater, interpersonal skills are key to success," T'Pol said. "How are the scientists chosen?"
"First and foremost, their research will narrow the pool," Etienne explained. "With the gravity and air concentration only certain experiments will benefit. Secondly, level of commitment to their work. It's a two-year placement so you have to be dedicated to your work. Thirdly, their ability to work well with others and not allow their emotions to run hot."
"That excludes you, Trip," Jon joked.
"Hardy har," Trip mocked.
"You are quite emotional Commander?" Etienne asked.
"I have to control my frustration and anger when mistakes are made," Trip nodded.
"And you are not always successful," T'Pol noted.
"No, not always," Trip conceded.
"I imagine you don't have issues with anger and frustration T'Pol," Etienne said as he smiled at her broadly.
"Vulcans are taught to keep their emotions in check," T'Pol said plainly.
"Yeah, but when you've worked with her long enough you pick up on the angry hints," Trip chuckled.
"Like when she raises just one eyebrow," Jon added as he looked at T'Pol.
"Of flares her nostrils," Trip added. "Kinda like what you're doing now."
T'Pol unflared her nostrils and sat back crossing her arms over her chest.
"That too," Jon nodded toward her posture.
"I can see you've been working together for quite some time and can…read each other well," Etienne said trying to stop the teasing of the beautiful woman across from him.
"Yes, and the Captain just yells and barks when he is angry," T'Pol said as she uncrossed her arms and reached for her fork again. "We all have our…"
"Tells," Trip supplied.
"Tells?" T'Pol and Etienne asked at the same time.
"It's a poker term for revealing something about your hand, or your feelings about your hand without actually saying anything," Trip said as he placed down his forked and eyed Etienne suspiciously. "Like if Malcolm has a good hand he fidgets in his seat or tries not to."
"So, an indicator," Etienne nodded.
"Sure," Trip nodded and shrugged.
"Interesting," Etienne said.
"If you'll excuse me," T'Pol said as she pushed back from the table.
"I'll walk with you," Etienne said, rising quickly as well. "Thank you for dinner, Captain."
"Have a nice evening Commander," Jon said as he watched Etienne follow into step next to T'Pol.
"One of the more conversational scientists we've had on board," Jon said, reaching for his coffee.
"Yes," Trip said, his brow furrowing.
XXX
"Please tell me if I'm prying," Etienne said to T'Pol the next day in the lab after he had looked at their analysis of the DNA of a rare sponge. "But have you had the opportunity to examine the DNA of the hybrid child Terra Prime created?"
T'Pol, slightly taken aback by his personal question, stepped away from the screen.
"Phlox has conducted that research. As she was related to me, it would be an ethical dilemma," T'Pol stated.
"I'm sorry, did I upset you?" Etienne asked, concerned. "I thought the child was only alive for…"
"I am not upset," T'Pol said as she stepped back toward the screen. "It was a year ago, and you are correct, I only knew her for a few days."
"I apologize, I thought as a scientist, you would have understood…"
"Understood?" T'Pol asked, confused.
"That the creation of that child is one of the largest scientific discoveries of our time," Etienne. "That perfecting that DNA sequencing process is a perfect line of scientific inquiry and…"
"I'm sorry, I am required on the bridge," T'Pol said stepping away. "Ensign Finn will be happy to show you our other sponge findings."
T'Pol nodded to her colleague and quickly exited the lab.
Tomorrow was the one-year anniversary of finding Elizabeth and meeting her for the first time. One year ago tomorrow, she held her daughter in her arms, and tomorrow she would not. As much as finding Elizabeth was shocking and overwhelming, she had settled into a future as a family quite readily. She loved Trip, and if she was honest with herself, still loved him. He would have made an excellent father and, despite their differences, they would have been a successful family.
She was aware, through their bond, that Trip also knew the significance of this week and was both upset and worried. They hadn't spoken much about Elizabeth in the last year and had fallen, quite easily, back into their friendship. There had been no romance since Elizabeth's death; each retreating to that comfortable place of friendship that had been the base of their relationship. Elizabeth entered her thoughts daily and she worked hard for the first few months after her death to keep her emotions in check, even in private. Trip's attempts to talk with her right after Elizabeth died were met with her Vulcan armor at full strength. If she didn't supress right away, it would linger for years to come and she couldn't live like that.
But, the heaviness in her heart grew each day T'Pol stepped closer and closer to this anniversary. Commander Martin's transport to Prius One was a welcome distraction that she needed right now, and he had destroyed that with his question.
She walked onto the Bridge to be greeted by Trip standing only a half metre from the door.
"You okay?" He asked, concerned.
"I am fine," T'Pol said softly, not meeting his eyes.
Trip didn't move and didn't say anything.
She walked toward him and, steeling all of her emotional strength, met his eyes.
"I am," she said reassuringly.
He met her gaze and nodded before he stepped back and returned to his work.
"Your shift doesn't begin for another hour," Jon said as he noted T'Pol sitting in the second chair at the science station.
"I have some telemetry results I need to analyze," T'Pol said quietly, her voice not as strong as usual.
A minute passed before Jon spoke.
"Trip, T'Pol, can I see you in my ready room?"
They both nodded and followed him inside.
"Have a seat," Jon said as he gestured toward the chairs.
Trip and T'Pol sat.
"I am not going to pretend that we don't know what date is coming up," Jon said softly as he looked at Trip rubbing his hands together. That was his 'tell' that he was nervous.
"Elizabeth," Trip supplied.
"If you would both like to take a few days or, at minimum, the anniversary of her death, I'd like you to have some time to…" Jon said softly.
"I would like to take a one-day leave on Thursday," T'Pol said, surprising them both.
Trip was sure the offer would be met with her 'I don't need time off because I'm Vulcan' type of response.
"You can take more time if you'd like," Jon said, surprised as well but her quick request.
"No, I will only need that day," T'Pol replied. Her voice was weak and her eyes watery.
"Trip?" Jon asked.
"I'd like that day as well," Trip said as he boldly reached for her hand.
She, shockingly, took his hand in a fierce grip and didn't let go.
"Okay," Jon said. "But if you decide you need more time just alert your second in command that they are in charge."
"Thank you, Captain," T'Pol said softly and Trip smiled weakly at Jon.
"How about I…give you some time to discuss any ceremonies or arrangements or…Elizabeth," Jon said before he nodded at them and left his ready room.
"T'Pol?" Trip asked as he turned toward her and noted the whirlwind of emotions across their bond.
It was then, that she collapsed against him and cried.
He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her toward him tightly, both overwhelmed by her display of emotion and the fact that she shared it with him.
He held her for a long time, rocking her gently and thinking about the last year. He'd wanted to help her navigate the emotional nightmare of losing a child, but she had been quite averse to any of his attempts. He too had lost a daughter, but he was human and allowed to be down, to cry, to get angry and to explode about the injustice of it all. He had done all of this and more and been supported by his friends on board. T'Pol, however, only had him. And she had rejected any and all of his attempts to be that person for her. How she had dealt with it he wasn't sure. So, he had followed her lead and taken up the role of her friend, like before. Before they fell in love, before they were romantically involved, before sex, before he told her he loved her, before they had a daughter. He wiped all of that away and was her friend, that's what she needed, and that's what he could give her.
"Talk to me darlin'" Trip said softly as she sat back up and wiped at her tears.
"I hadn't realized how affected I would be by this time," T'Pol said softly. "I didn't have these issues after either of my parents died."
"You were in your twenties when your father died and your sixties when your mother died," Trip said. "As much as that is a short time in the life of a Vulcan, it's still many years for you to love them. For a relationship to develop. To build memories. We only had a few days with Elizabeth."
T'Pol nodded, his explanation had merit.
"Maybe you need a few days," Trip said softly as he brushed her hair off her face, she'd gown it longer in the last year and it was now grazing her shoulder.
"I'm…"
"Fine?" Trip asked with two raised eyebrows.
"I need to be an ambassador for Commander Martin until he's on Prius One," T'Pol said as she wiped at her eyes.
"He'll be fine," Trip sighed. "And it's…well, it's Elizabeth. No one would think less of you for needing some time."
T'Pol met his eyes. "I'll take that under advisement."
Trip smiled at her.
"Is there…are there any Vulcan traditions we should do for the anniversary of her death?" Trip asked.
"On Vulcan, you burn a pyre of the deceased person's belongings," T'Pol said. "That would be impossible for Elizabeth."
"True," Trip said softly. "And I…honestly, I couldn't give up the couple things I have."
"You have her hat and shoes," T'Pol said softly.
Trip nodded.
"I have the outfits," T'Pol said softly. "She wasn't alive long enough to accumulate much."
"And we buried her with the bunny Travis made for her with the sequencer," Trip said softly.
T'Pol nodded.
"On Earth?"
"Everyone is different," Trip sighed. "Some people have a service to remember their loved one. Some people a dinner or a gathering. Others don't mark the day at all."
"What would you prefer?" T'Pol asked as she met his eyes. She was still leaning into him and holding his hand.
"How about a small dinner?" Trip asked. "Just us, Jon, Phlox, Mal, Hoshi, & Travis?"
"I'm not sure I could…"
Just then he felt panic over her ability to control her emotions for the length of a dinner.
"We don't have to do any…"
"You want to," T'Pol said, knowing he did.
Trip sighed, "I would like something."
"A brief ceremony to commemorate the day and her," T'Pol said. "Only those you mentioned."
"In the Captain's mess, but just a few minutes," Trip said, trying to ease her panic.
"Agreed," she said as she sat up slightly and pulled away from him, releasing his hand.
They sat close but not touching for a few minutes.
"And maybe you and I could have some time?" T'Pol asked.
"I'd like that," Trip nodded.
She took a deep breath and sat up a little straighter.
"Tomorrow we're running a full diagnostic that will take most of the day," Trip said. "If you need me…"
"I will let you know," T'Pol said softly.
"It's hard to believe a year has passed," Trip said as he shook his head.
T'Pol stood and wiped at her eyes again.
Trip also stood and looked at her appraisingly.
"Maybe give it another minute," he said as he noted some redness still around her eyes.
T'Pol nodded and walked toward the window. She needed to talk about something besides their daughter.
"Commander Martin is impressed by our work on sponges and their…"
"I think he's impressed with you," Trip said as he walked next to her and also looked out the window. "You are a great scientist, T'Pol."
She acknowledged the compliment with a nod.
"You know, there will be labs sending you offers…" Trip said softly. "I think Commander Martin is scoping you out to offer you a job."
"I've already received a few since our discovery of the formulation," T'Pol said, not meeting his eyes. "I sensed the same from Commander Martin."
"And have you considered…?" Trip couldn't finish the sentence; the idea of her leaving Enterprise was like a lump in his throat.
"No," T'Pol said clearly.
Trip tried to think of something that would keep her on Enterprise, but he was so caught up by fear he froze.
"Are my eyes normal again?" T'Pol asked as he looked up at him.
"They're perfect," he said with a small, soft smile.
She nodded, and they exited the Captain's ready room.
XXX
"I apologize for my mis-step," Etienne said as he stood in front of T'Pol's door to her quarters with a bowl of fruit. "All of the news articles, at the time, didn't seem to indicate you had much to do with the child."
"Elizabeth," T'Pol corrected him. It was after dinner and she was just about to meditate when he rang her buzzer.
Etienne nodded.
"Thank you for your apology," T'Pol said as she reached for the fruit. Tomorrow she would need all of her strength to deal with the day they met Elizabeth.
"I wish I could do more," Etienne said.
"I appreciate the fruit," T'Pol countered. She needed to get to her meditation.
"I looked up the date and realized it's in two days," Etienne said. "I hope you are taking some time to yourself. I can manage with your staff if…"
"I will see you tomorrow morning to look at the latest results from the moss," T'Pol said quietly.
Just then, Trip rounded the corner by her quarters and noted the Commander standing outside and T'Pol standing holding fruit.
"Good evening Commanders," Trip said to them both, causing them to look at him. He sensed worry from T'Pol.
"Good evening Commander Tucker," Etienne said turning to face him. "I imagine this week is challenging for you as well."
Trip looked toward T'Pol suddenly and she looked down. He now knew why she was upset and worried.
"It is," Trip said as he stepped closer to the door. "You brought T'Pol some fruit?"
"As an apology for my mis-step about the Hybrid child," Etienne said.
"Elizabeth," Trip corrected him as he felt a wave of sorrow slide across their bond. "Elizabeth Tucker."
"Right," Etienne nodded, still clueless.
Trip stepped toward T'Pol's door and past Etienne.
"You ready to discuss that staff review?" Trip asked her as he stepped just inside her door.
"Yes, I have all of the files open," T'Pol said softly, relief washing over the bond.
Trip turned to face Etienne, he and T'Pol clearly on one side of the opening and Etienne on the other.
"Have a good night Commander, and thanks for the fruit," Trip said before he pushed the button to shut the door.
XXX
On Thursday morning, Trip found himself waking in a space he'd long thought was off limits. He was in T'Pol's bed. And she was still in it with him. Nothing had happened, but last night she'd asked him to stay with her. For two nights he'd come to her room in the evening. Sometimes they meditated, sometimes they spoke, but most of the time they both just read or worked in the company of each other. Then, about midnight, he left. They both seemed to need the time together, individually thinking about Elizabeth and it felt good to be on the same page for once.
Then, last night, when he went to leave, she had called his name from her place on the bed where she was reading. Across the bond she asked him to stay. He wasn't sure if she was too embarrassed to say the words out loud, or afraid he'd say no, whatever the reason, she asked, and he stayed. Carefully they undressed to their underwear and crawled into bed together. When she scooted close to him, he knew it was an invitation to wrap and arm around her shoulder and pull her in close. It felt good to be holding her again, despite the crappy circumstances, and Trip had to remind himself again and again that she needed him to grieve, that she didn't want him as anything more than a good friend.
"I choose to stay on Enterprise," T'Pol said when she realized he's woken.
"You're awake," Trip said softly as he looked down at her.
"I have been awake for two point three hours," T'Pol noted.
"And you didn't get up?" Trip asked, surprised.
"No," T'Pol said simply.
"That's different," Trip said, confused.
"Different?" T'Pol asked.
"When…when we were together," Trip started, not sure he should go there. "I'd wake up to find you either gone or in the shower or working at your desk."
"I hadn't realized," T'Pol said as she accessed all of her memories of waking with Trip.
He was right, she hadn't once stayed in bed with him until he woke. It was illogical; she was awake and had things to do, why should she lay in bed longer?
"Wait, what did you say about Enterprise?" Trip asked.
T'Pol rose slightly and looked down at him.
"I said I choose to stay on Enterprise," T'Pol said softly.
Trip looked at her confused then realized what she was talking about.
"Oh, you mean the job offers?" Trip asked.
"Yes," T'Pol said softly.
"Are you choosing to stay now or for longer?" Trip asked, worry clouding his scratchy morning voice.
"For longer," T'Pol said.
"Oh, okay, good," Trip said, still uneasy.
They lay like that for a minute before she spoke again.
"She died three hours ago, while we were sleeping," T'Pol said softly.
Trip's face fell.
"Do you remember?"
"I do," Trip said as he swallowed hard. "I was holding her."
"And I alerted you to her laboured breathing," T'Pol said quietly.
"And we called Phlox but when we looked back…"
"She had died," T'Pol said softly.
"In my arms," Trip said as a tear fell from his eye.
T'Pol wiped away his tear and lay back down with her head on his chest.
"We watched her for another forty minutes," T'Pol said softly.
"And then Phlox made us leave so he could…"
T'Pol nodded against his chest.
"There was a darkness across the bond," Trip said softly. "It's the only time I've ever…"
"It was the loss," T'Pol said quietly. "She was part of the bond, briefly."
"What?" Trip asked surprised as he tried to look at her.
"She was there, with us," T'Pol said quietly. "For a few hours."
"She was?" Trip asked, confused.
"It was all the holding," T'Pol said. "She bonded with us in her last few hours. Which made her loss that much more…difficult for each of us."
"You've never told me that," Trip said as he rose slightly and they both sat up.
"You didn't mention that you were aware and I was afraid it would hurt you more, at the time," T'Pol said honestly.
"What…how was she with us?" Trip asked, suddenly comforted by this thought.
"She was the colour yellow," T'Pol said. "Do you remember the yellow?"
"I do," Trip said. "There was a lot of yellow around the bond. Like…swirling."
"That was Elizabeth," T'Pol said as her eyes lit up.
"Elizabeth," Trip smiled.
"It brings you comfort," T'Pol noted.
"It…it does," Trip said softly as he reached out and cupped her cheek. "Thank you."
T'Pol turned and kissed the palm of his hand.
Trip closed his eyes and tried to quiet the hammering of his heart.
"The service for Elizabeth is in an hour," T'Pol said softly.
"We should get ready," Trip said, still not moving from their position. "I should go back to my room."
T'Pol nodded. Trip rose, dressed and left with her still sitting on her bed.
XXX
"I should…" Trip said later that night. Jon had conducted a nice short service for Elizabeth earlier that day and they had spent the rest of the day in her room. T'Pol had managed to hold it together for the ceremony but Trip had cried through it.
That day, in her room, they had cried together, they had napped together, and they had eaten together. And now, in the late hours of the evening, on the anniversary of their daughter's death, they needed to part.
"You're not staying?" T'Pol asked, surprised.
"I could," Trip shrugged. Truthfully, he liked being with her at this time. It was almost like it made up for them not being together after she died. He knew it would end eventually but wasn't in any hurry to get there again.
T'Pol rose from her spot on the bed and reached for his shirt, undoing it, she dropped it to the floor. Trip looked down at her, surprised. She then turned away and started to undress herself. They crawled into bed together and she placed her head on his chest.
"I stay because of you," T'Pol said softly as the darkness surrounded them.
"Me?" Trip asked.
"I still love you, Trip," T'Pol admitted.
Trip turned and looked at her in the dark, he wished he could see her face in that moment.
"I love you too, T'Pol," Trip said honestly.
"I would like us to stop being friends," T'Pol said as he felt her hand come up and cover his heart. "I would like to be your mate again, if you are agreeable."
Trip smiled in the dark.
"I am," Trip said. "Is this because of Elizabeth?"
"I have missed you," T'Pol said quietly. "I stayed away because I thought together we'd be too sad."
"And?"
"And I have realized these last few days, that together we are stronger," T'Pol noted.
"We are," Trip sighed as he kissed the top of her head. "I'm surprised you realized that, though."
"It took me a year," T'Pol said quietly.
"It did," Trip smiled.
"I do not wish to wait another year to be your mate again," T'Pol said clearly. "But I understand if you are reluctant to…"
"I've been waiting," Trip interrupted.
"Waiting?" T'Pol asked.
"I've always wanted to be with you T'Pol," Trip said quietly. "Maybe…maybe we needed some time after Elizabeth to know that it wasn't just…that we were meant o be together?"
He felt her nod against his chest and then squeeze his waist momentarily. The dark engulfed them as they fell asleep holding onto each other, the sorrow of the day behind them.
