Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephanie Meyer. I don't own anything.
Authors notes: This is my first uploaded fan fiction. Please review so I know if I should continue. This is a Jasper Fanfiction
Chapter Eleven
Days go by
Jasper's P.O.V.
The morning came and went into night. She pretended yesterday didn't happen. I manipulated her fearful emotions till she fell asleep. I listened to the steady beat of her heart through the wall of my bed room. I heard her awaked gasping. It must have been another bad dream. I didn't go to comfort her but I projected as many warm feelings I could scrape up from my dying heart. I to became emotionally adrift. Her sorrowful and depressed emotions entangled the same reflection of my own heart. I was lost.
I lived each day and night avoiding contact with her. Instead I settled for the sounds of her breathing and her beating heart to pass the days that slowly went by. She became more dependant on Bella and Rosalie. Spending 90% of her time with them. I spent my time alone or with Emmett. Alice and Jared came back after a week of hunting and staying at the Denali coven. I was so excited about seeing her beautiful face I waited impatiently outside till I heard her car hit the pavement.
I saw Alice beautiful face and she waved. I was so glad to see her. She must have noticed I was not my self or had some vision. I longed for her and to my surprise she ran over to me and through her arms around me holding me against her small frame.
"Everything is going to be okay. You cant give up on her" she whispered into my ear. I felt her sweet breath against my skin and I pulled her tighter against me.
"I don't know if I can, she isn't one of us. I'm better off alone." I said burying my face in her hair.
"You deserve to be happy to Jasper. She can make you so happy if you let her." I half pulled away from Alice to look into her face. I know I looked confused and sad but I knew what I had to do. I let Alice go. It killed me to let her go. But that is exactly what I did. I looked at her with pained eyes, but I smiled at her anyway. I then shocked her and walked over to Jared.
"Hey wanna hunt?" I said trying to make peace with him. We never got along but I wanted to build the bridge that I burned down so many years ago.
"Yeah that would be great. Alice baby I'll be back." He said smiling at his beautiful wife. She looked at me with a pleased wide smile. She had been waiting 40 years for this. We took off into forest.
I was hoping to lose my self in the hunt, forget about her for just one peaceful moment. We ran for miles and searched out a den of mountain lions to tear apart. Side by side with my new friend Jared we tore through killing anything with four legs.
Jaina's P.O.V.
Its been two weeks since mine and Japers confrontation. I was excited for today. It was Sunday. I was getting my stitches removed my wrists healed wonderfully since they were not deep at all and could come out today too. I waited in Carlisle office as he got his instruments ready.
"Ready for the big moment sweetheart?" Carlisle asked. I was almost giddy. I smiled wide and shook my head at the same time I said
"YES, YES,YES!" I couldn't contain my excitement. He motioned for me to remove my shirt. I never got undressed so fast in my life. I was sitting in my bra and jeans, unembarrassed, and completely at ease. He moved quickly but crustily clipping the fine threads and pulling then from my skin. He then grabbed a pliers and pulled countless staples from my back. When he was done he smiled at me and said
"We can look into plastic surgery if you like" I stood up and ran to the full length mirror and examined the thin scars that lined my back and arms.
"Maybe after graduation. I start school tomorrow." I said excitedly. It wasn't so bad. It was but it looked way better with out all the thread and staples. I could live with this. I ran over and hugged him and then grabbed my shirt and took off to show everyone. I didn't care that I was half dressed.
"Rosalie! Rosalie!" I yelled looking for my friend. Bella was out with Edward. She ran out of her room and stopped dead in her tracks looking at me with a wide grin.
"You look beautiful, there so fine you barely notice them." she said smiling. I was so happy. I ran upstairs and through on my sneakers and a tank top. I opened my door and blindly ran for the stairs when I ran into a brick wall. A brick wall named Jasper.
I stumbled backwards on the steps and he caught me. He looked at me with hesitation. His icy hands wrapped around my arm, his expression never changing. I grabbed the railing and steadied my self.
"Sorry, I wasn't paying attention. I. I am sorry." I said my voice shaking. I tried to pull away gently but he didn't let go he just stared at me. A few moments passed our eyes locked when he lips turned into a slight smirk. He let go and I turned away from him and ran down the stairs, and out the door.
Japer's P.O.V.
I hadn't had contact with Jaina for weeks, Alice kept trying to make me change my mind, but still I kept my distance. That is until today. I felt her excitement, her joy as she raced up the stairs. Her emotions have cost me a lot in paint and canvas. I must have painted a dozen pictures of her. I packed all my paintings and sketches of Alice and put them in plastic bin stored in my closet. I no longer yearned for her. I longed for Jaina.
I opened my door and snuck downstairs to catch a glimpse of her newly stitch free skin. I waited for her to disappear upstairs before I dared steel away to my room. Unfortunately she didn't stay in her room she ran straight into me on the stairway. She fell back but I caught her. Her skin was like fire, so warm and alive. I didn't want to let her go. I fought to let go of her. I wanted feel the warmth of her skin against mine, in more ways then one. I wanted to feel her hot breath on my face and wanted more then anything to kiss her. I let her go and she ran down the stairs.
I was worried now. Worried about tomorrow. She would be starting school. I already graduated and wouldn't be able to monitor her emotions. I hoped she would be able to manage and make friends and live a normal life but there was a part of me that hoped she wouldn't. I pushed that part of me out of my thoughts. I cant have her. She was not for me.
I wondered down into the front room and saw Emmet setting up his Playstation 3.
"Wanna play me bro?" he asked whiled he was fidgeting with all the wires.
"Yeah why not." I wondered over to the couch and picked up one of the guitar controllers and sat down. He put in the disc, waited patiently for it to load. He grabbed his guitar and we played. We played for hours. He'd win one id win one. I was completely consumed. Then Emmett looked at me and said
"You ever gonna forgive her, I mean, she's going to school tomorrow. I hate to say it bro but even with the scars she's pretty cute. Someone else might snatch her up and you'll lose your chance." I just stared at him.
"She doesn't need me, she'd be better off, with someone else." He smirked at me "Yeah I guess if that's what you want, some high school jock getting in her panties. How bout Mike Newton, he bombed on Bella, maybe she would make a great consolation prize. I can see it now, Jaina in the backseat of Mikes car. OH YEAH MIKE GIVE IT TO ME!" He said poorly imitating Jaina's voice. I was instantly pissed. Venom filled my mouth and I felt a deep growl echo in my chest.
"Hey dude calm down, I thought she didn't matter to you." he said defending himself. I couldn't speak only glare, I wanted to tear him apart but I couldn't bring myself to move.
"Oh I get it you do care." Emmet said staring at me waiting for me to respond. A huge grin plastered on his face.
"Care about what?" a voice from the hall way broke my stair. It was Rosalie.
"Oh nothing babe. Nothing we cant handle right Jazz?" Emmett said trying to cover for me.
"Yeah, there's nothing I cant handle." I said my voice thick with irritation. I sat up from the couch and ran up the stairs to my room. I locked the door behind me. I walked up to my art table and pushed all the bottles of brushes and pigment on to the floor. They crashed hitting the tile shattering into pieces. I sat down at my now empty table, and put my head in my hands, my elbows propped on the table.
I finally realize it didn't matter how many times I painted her face or listened to her heart it would never be enough. I felt the impending doom of her finding someone else. I thought about my choices. They were all bad. I was to stubborn to admit I needed her. Instead I just fell deep into thought, I didn't move. I just sat there.
The day passed me by and settled into the night and back into day. I never budged. I just sat perfectly still. I was finally struck from my sedative mood by the sound of an alarm clock. I looked at the time. It was 6 am. She was going to school today. I felt her anxiety pulse through the walls. It was if it had its own mechanical tick. I sent her a calm sensation, but I knew it wouldn't last as soon as she left for school.
I listened to her shower, I imagined the water rolling off her body, the heat of the water turning her tan skin slightly pink. I shook off the vision when my mouth filled with venom. I wanted to go with her to school to protect her, but there was no way for me too. I would have to endure the day unknowing. Maybe I could hit up Alice before they leave but that thought was dismissed as soon as it came.
I herd her turn off the water, and the sway of the towel as she wrapped it around her body. I herd her rummage through her drawer and I imagined her dressing. I almost slapped myself for my thoughts. I prayed Edward wasn't around to read them. I waited patiently and finally it happened. She opened her door and rushed down the steps.
I quietly opened my door and stole away downstairs to catch a glimpse of her. She was standing with Alice, in the kitchen. She look stunning. She dressed simple, jeans and a tight pink t-shirt. Her arm warmers pulled up hiding her scars, her hair was in a pony tail and her bangs hung low to cover the scars on he face. You couldn't tell this girl fell two stories three weeks ago. Her face was what struck me. Her tan complexion complimented by her full glossy pink lips. I could smell her shampoo and it was intoxicating.
I suddenly felt extreme jealousy. Jealous about any boy who was going to be sitting next to her today. She grabbed her back pack an kissed Esme. They were out the door. As soon as the door closed I rushed to the window to watch her walk away. They climbed in Edwards car, and drove away. I instantly began to sulk. Then I felt a small hand on my shoulder. I looked to see Esme staring up at me. Her angelic face would never cause me irritation. I smiled as warmly as I could but she saw right through it.
"Son, Jaina seemed to have left her lunch money. Will you please be a dear and deliver it to her." she said smiling and handing me a twenty. I knew she didn't need it. Alice and Edward always had money but it was her way of giving me a reason to check on her. I took the folded bill and put it in my pocket. I smiled at her warmly.
"I'll be sure she gets it." I grabbed my leather coat and my keys and headed out the door.
