Author's note: So, I actually managed to get this chapter written fairly quickly. I think I finally broke whatever horrible writer's block I had been having. Yay for that! Anyway, I am actually pretty fond of this chapter, simply because I realized how easy Sparrow and Reaver are to write with each other. I love their relationship and I love the chemistry between them. I think I might do more with them, but who knows.
Enjoy!
Chapter Eleven – One More Go-Around
Richard didn't see Reaver that morning. He dared to ask a few of the servants and all of them said the same thing:
"Master Reaver said nothing of his departure."
"King Lionheart, you have a visitor."
Sparrow lifted his head from his reading, his eyes locking onto his butler Jasper. The man was in a bow; his form obviously awaiting any response the king could give. Sparrow sighed and set the book down on his lap, regrettably paying attention to Jasper.
"I thought I said no disturbances."
"He has a gun, sire," Jasper lifted his eyes and said the words in a tone that suggested only one thing.
"Come in, Reaver," Sparrow shouted around the servant, dismissing the man as Reaver entered with his Dragonstomper slung over his shoulder in a cocky manner. Sparrow smiled sourly and stood from his chair, setting the book on a table nearby. Reaver watched him and said nothing, silence rolling off him in waves. Sparrow stopped and eyed him seriously, concern finally finding his emotions. "Is there something I can help you with, Reaver?"
"The nightmares are back."
"What do you mean?" Sparrow took another step towards the pirate, his brows furrowing in concern. Reaver sighed, his breath shaking as it left his lungs. He let the gun fall from his shoulder and somehow numbly find its' way back into the holster on his thigh.
"The shadows – the gun – they're talking to me again," Reaver stated, his voice smaller and shakier than it had been a single sentence ago. Sparrow reached forward and rest a single hand on the mans' shoulder, guiding him somehow to a nearby chair.
Reaver wanted to object to being treated like a frail child, but a larger part of him was already shattered. He could feel his walls crumbling around him and he knew – he knew – that at any second, he could completely break. He would rather have someone there for him than to do it alone. Not again.
"What is going on, Reaver?" Sparrow asked, his hand still on Reaver's shoulder. The pirate looked away from the blazing blue eyes that still pained his heart to look at. He sighed heavily and felt his shoulders begin to shake.
"I… I came to you because you are the one person who I know I can talk to. I can't… I can't talk to anybody else about this, Sparrow," Reaver knotted his hands into his hair as he slumped forward, looking to Sparrow as if he could literally start sobbing at any moment. Sparrow moved his hands to Reaver's back in a comforting manner, reaching behind him with his free arm to pull a chair closer to him. He sat then and pulled the pirate closer to his chest, feeling his own heart shatter as the pirate went limp against him.
"So talk," Sparrow offered, running his hand through the man's hair and pushing his out of the way. Reaver shook his head lightly, as if that was all the movement of his body that he could muster.
"They're going to take it all away again, Sparrow."
"Not if you don't let them."
The blonde man kept staring at him, as if that answer was some sort of shocking revelation. Reaver simply stared back, waiting for the man to catch on.
"So, what? You think that because you – one person out of hundreds – know how to fend for yourself, that we automatically do as well?" The blonde was angry now. Reaver stared back with uninterested eyes.
"I can teach you."
"And what makes you think –"
"Let him teach us, Robert. He may be telling the truth, you know."
Reaver felt another sob creeping up on his lungs. He could try and hold it back, but that seemed pointless, now. He was, after all, in the kings' arms shaking like a scared child. So, as the tears pricked at his eyes and he finally felt whatever shred of control he had fly off in the wind, he allowed the sob to rack through his body. He leaned further into the king and began sobbing, tears staining his cheeks and flowing down onto the regal clothes.
The only thing that entered his mind, however, was the hand constantly on his back.
"It will be alright, Reaver. They can't actually hurt you, you know," Sparrow mumbled, resting his head on top of Reaver's and inhaling the pirate's all-too-familiar scent.
"You know that's a lie, Little Bird," Reaver hissed through his teeth, the nickname finding his tongue without intention. Sparrow tensed for the briefest of seconds before taking a sharp breath and continuing.
"The Shadow Court was destroyed. You do remember that horrible month, oh, about 30 years ago, yes?" Sparrow teased lightly, trying to get Reaver back to a former shadow of himself. It was a start, and the king knew he had nowhere else to start.
"They never go away, little bird."
Suddenly, Reaver knew why they were returning. They had lost their home and were now looking for a replacement. They were desperate to crawl under someone's skin and just so happened to have access to his.
"Not if you let them stay," Sparrow spoke softly, still holding the man to his chest and breathing in his scent. He was well versed in facing demons and knew how to rid someone of them. He still had nightmares, but the difference was that he did not let the fear eat away at him. Reaver had appeared to be capable of that, years ago. But now –
"You don't know that, Sp–"
"Try to believe that I do," Sparrow's voice rose and he pushed away from the man. Their eyes locked and Reaver was suddenly reacquainted with the eyes that ran in the family; eyes that could blaze as bright as the purest sky, if they needed to. Sparrow sighed and stood, walking over to his desk and reaching in a drawer. What he pulled out had Reaver on his feet in seconds.
"You have – why in the hell do you have one of those?"
Sparrow sighed and held the gun gingerly in his hand, his fingers flexing around the metal in an almost experimental way. He let his eyes fall away from Reaver and stay fixated on the gun, remembering the moment and wishing he could do anything but.
"When you sent me in with the seal… They were rather adamant that I take it. I didn't really have a choice in the matter," Sparrow muttered, clenching his hands tighter around the metal before letting it go and fall to his desk. His eyes tore away from it and landed back on Reaver, watching him carefully.
"They are planning something, Reaver. You and I just so happened to be in the middle of it."
"What do you mean?" Reaver asked, the words leaving his lips and sending a numb chill through his whole body. He fell back into the chair, his body finally unable to keep up with his rapidly changing emotions.
"The Shadow Court was… well, they were not stupid," Sparrow walked around his desk and returned to his seat next to Reaver, folding his hands in his lap as he sat down. "They knew that you would eventually become a useful pawn, and chances are that they thought the same way of me. I don't think they saw my death coming, however," Sparrow laughed lightly, trying to break the thick ice that had once again formed between them. Reaver was watching him as if he was crazy – was he sticking up for the Shadow Court? – and waited for his turn to completely go off on the king.
"So you're saying that they're using us?" Reaver ran a hand through his hair as his gaze fell to the floor and his mind spun with thoughts and possibilities. He wanted them all to go away but knew that somehow the minute his mind went blank, he would regret it. That would let the shadows in and he did not want that to happen. He wanted them out and gone and if that meant killing something – someone…
"What did you honestly expect, Reaver? 200 years has not taught you much, I have to admit."
"Do not start with me, King Lionheart," Reaver warned, his voice harsh and hissed between teeth. "I am well aware of what has been done in my many years."
"Why do you insist upon shutting yourself off repeatedly, Reaver?'
"What do you mean?"
"Moments ago you were sobbing in my arms and now you are shutting me out completely. What happened to you wanting to talk about the nightmares and being willing enough to spill your soul?" Sparrow spoke with finality, determined to prove his point. Reaver went silent, his hands clenching into fists on his knees.
"You didn't exactly make it clear that you wanted me a part of your life – in fact, I recall that you shoved me out rather forcefully 19 years ago," Reaver growled the words, standing and finally allowing his eyes to flicker to Sparrow in a glare. He turned to leave, his back finally turning on the king. Sparrow stood as well, closing the distance between them and shoving him forcefully against the wall.
"That was 19 years ago, Reaver. It is time for you to move on – I did. I knew what I had to do and so I moved on. You can't hold onto us forever. Stop wallowing in your misery!" Sparrow lifted his arm and pushed it against the pirate's neck, pressing hard enough to get a small choking sound out of Reaver before he pushed away.
"You don't think I tried? You don't think that I forced any thought of you away for years on end? Hell, you don't think that every time I look at Richard, I see you?" Reaver shouted the words, his anger finally bubbling t the surface and escaping his carefully constructed walls.
"And don't you think it was agony for me to watch you do that? That it was painful to marry a woman I cared nothing for and have two children I never knew I could love so much?" Sparrow turned around slightly, his eyes meeting Reaver's with his own form of rage burning within. "I still remember everything, Reaver, and I would do anything to forget and move on."
"Why did you do it?"
"What?"
"Why did you walk away from what we had? You could have… there were other options."
Sparrow opened his mouth to reply, only to shut it in uncertainty. He let his eyes fall from Reaver, his anger flooding out and leaving his body limp. He wanted to tell the man the truth, to be able to make at least some form of friendship work between them. All he wanted was to be able to help Reaver through whatever the hell this was…
"Get out, Reaver. You got what you wanted, now leave."
The words left his mouth too soon and the door slammed shut moments later.
