CHRISTINE

I couldn't believe it was I seeing what I thought I was seeing. It was Erik he was here holding my son my son I wanted to hug him slap him kick his masked ass but right now all I wanted was my baby.

"Erik?" I asked as he came to me.

"My sweet one you did great having him, I was here listening and waiting." He said

"Give me my baby" I said Looking at Matthias who was back to sleeping in Erik's arms, all I wanted was my son back. I didn't know what Erik was going to do. All I wanted was my son in my arms.

"Your baby my sweet one our son" he said moving closer to me and I watched him as he kissed him and sat down on the bed, still not giving me my son MY SON!

"Just give me my son please or I'll call the nurse on you" I said

"The nurse I made sure they was and will be busy so I will have time with my family" he said and if he wasn't holding my son I would have slapped the shit out of him.

"Family? FAMILY no we are not that you've hurt my feelings, you've broken my heart. I gave you my time my love, I gave you my trust but you left me and my child." I said trying not to get loud so my son won't get scared.

"Christine I" he said but was cut off.

"A stiff apology is a second insult" I said and he looked at me studying my face I was not going for his bullshit. "You walked out on us not the other way around and I'm supposed to be glad that you're here? That you heard me have him am I supposed to leap in to your motherfucking arms and tell you I love you no fuck no" I said

"Christine you and your filthy mouth please not in front of our son" he said in a very calm voice.

"Fuck that you don't with our son bullshit he's mine your ass punked out and left and ran away like a bitch cause you didn't wanna be a father or know how to be a father.. That's fucking stupid!" I said

"I'm sorry that this hurt you me leaving wasn't to hurt you or our child" he said

"This is not the only time you hurt me, you lied to me. The truth may hurt for a little while but a lie hurts forever" I said

"How much I missed, simply because I was afraid of it." He said looking at me then at Matthias.

"At the end of the day, let there be no excuses, no explanations, no regrets." I said and reached for Matthias and he kissed him again and gave him to me.

'Waaan Waaan" Matthias cried and I rocked him and shushed him but it wasn't really working.

"Shush little one be nice to your mother" he said but it was a low whisper and it calmed him down.

"Thank you" I said as I check to see if he was wet so I changed him then I feed him the whole time Erik was watching. I rocked him right back to sleep, then I laid him down and Erik didn't say anything he just watched.

"Christine I..Erik…No I" he said I shook my head he looked at me lost.

"I'm too tired please visit with Matthias" I said laying back down pulling the cover over me I watched Erik for as long as I could before I fell asleep. Hours later when I woke up Erik was gone and Matthias was still here safe.

I was in the hospital for 3 day which wasn't bad, but once I got home with a new born baby it was totally different. A month went by and I was home alone with a baby. That's some scary shit I must say I just wish there was more help. I spent some nights holding Matty and thinking to myself. Dare I say I miss him? I do. I miss him. I still see him in my dreams. They are nightmares mostly, but nightmares tinged with love. I still cannot understand how he could abandon me US so unceremoniously, without any sort of real goodbye. That pain is like an axe that chops at my heart.

Raoul and Judi, Meg and Carlotta even came to help as much as they could but most nights it was me and Matty here alone and he wouldn't sleep when I wanted him too, or when I needed to sleep it was crazy today we was dressed and I was taking him on a little trip I packed so much shit for him you would have thought we was going on a trip. I had call this nice lady named Debbie I met her when I was pregnant and she told me she was a nanny and anytime I needed a break that I could bring him to her. Some nights I almost called her but I didn't.

"Are you ready Matty we are going on a little trip out of the house let's go have some fun." I said he just looked at me, I grabbed his stuff and left the house.

ERIK

I was in my music room where I spent most nights, weeks. I went to the opera house making sure they remember who's the one in charge. I didn't see Christine or Matthias I know I should have but I didn't I thought it will be better if I stayed away until she was ready for to see him.

I know this is not smart of me as a man but it was the only thing I had to go on was for her to let me know when she was ready. I kept myself busy and when Andre came around he wanted to tell me things that Carlotta told him I didn't want to hear of it. Not cause I didn't care because if I heard too much I would go right to Christine and take her and our son right back her with me, I didn't want to do that, well not again to her.

"Andre you can leave now" I said as we were in the livingroom. He was here and was being very annoying to me at the moment.

"'Erik if you would listen to reason, that person you was then and the person you was with her and the person you are now are 3 different people" Andre said

"Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood." I said Andre looked at me while I glared at him. "My past has not defined me, destroyed me, deterred me, or defeated me; it has only strengthened me."

""Frustration and Love can't exist in the same place at the same time, so get real and start doing what you would rather be doing in life. Love your life. All of it. Even the heavy shit that happened to you when you were 8. All of it was and IS perfect." Andre said and I wasn't pleased that he would say that to me my childhood was not a happy one but I don't need him tell me so I LIVED IT!

"Going back to something is harder than you think. Love demands everything, they say, but my love demands only this: that no matter what happens or how long it takes, she`ll keep faith in me, she`ll remember who we are, and she`ll never feel despair and I have failed with that I Erik am no better than my own father. Andre it's time for you to go" I said getting up opening the door. "And if you fall victim to one of my traps you shall stay there till the next morning." I said and he walked out and looked at me.

"You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She's not perfect—you aren't either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break—her heart. So don't hurt her, don't change her, don't analyze and don't expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she's not there." Andre said and left. I walked to my music room and started to work on some sheet music. I was in here for about 2 or 3 hours when my ears picked up on something.

I heard a small sound that wasn't familiar with my ears. I got up and exited the room walking out to my living room knowing whoever was bold enough to break in here would not leave alive. I walked into the livingroom and what I saw stopped me in my tracks.

"Christine?" I asked she looked up at from the stroller to look at me.

"Hello Erik" she said and gave me a small smile. "I hope you don't mind me being here, I wanted to show him his other home, his eyes glow in the dark like yours do when we was walking in the tunnel."

"They do?" I asked

"Yes he didn't seem to mind the dark like I do" she said and she leaned down and fixed his blanket. "I have to go to the bathroom I'll be right back" she walked out of the livingroom going down the hall, I notice she went the way to my room. I stood there for a minute, then I walked to my son when I heard him fuss.

"Hello there little one" I said he looked up at me and I removed my mask he had no reaction so I picked him up holding him now in my arms he was a lot heavier than before and he then grabbed at my nose, I smiled the feeling. "Would you like to see the music room?" I walked out of the living room and down to the music room where I walked around showing him different things. "Anyone catch your eye little one? No nothing maybe you will play them all but let's start with the piano one of my favorites" I sat down and held him on my lap he gripped my thumb and I smiled again as I played with one hand rocking him and singing softly.

After a while I stop singing and playing and looked down and my son was sleep head leaning back on my arm eyes closed. I smiled at the sight I didn't know I could put him to sleep like this. Then I noticed we wasn't alone, I looked at the door and saw Christine smiling at us.

"Christine" I said she waved me off and I stood up slowly holding him and I walked to her.

"We should lay him down, your room" she said we walked to my room but I stopped her.

"I want to show you something" I said and walked us to the room next to mine and opened it and we walked in.

"Erik" she said as she walked in more looking around the room. I had changed this empty room to a baby room everything you could think of was in here.

"I didn't know what he would need so I brought everything I saw the room on the other side of the house has more things in it too" I said

"I see this is amazing we can lay him down in here" she said and I walked to the crib and laid him down she watched me as I put the cover over him, leaning down I kissed his temple. And we left the room.

"Will he be alright in there alone?" I asked standing by the door.

"Yes he'll be fine come on I wanna talk to you.' She said and I followed her to the livingroom where we sat on the couch.

"Christine I wanna say" I said but stopped when she raised her hand.

"I want to say this It's been hell with him alone this passed month I barely get any sleep, and it's hard doing for him alone I didn't make him alone so I shouldn't be doing all this alone you understand what I'm say?" she asked

"Yes I do" I said feeling bad that my sweet one struggled with our son.

"Erik for those months carrying him I hated you and I wish I never met you but then I knew I wouldn't have him that beautiful little boy your son my son. But then I noticed it's so hard to love someone who looks like someone you hate. I hate you then as the days came and went I knew how I felt and it wasn't hating you… I grew up with parents who loved me and raised me. But you didn't your father wasn't there your mother was mean and she created a monster someone pushed off by the world. And then I understood it was in your DNA that you was like this. I don't hate you anymore I hate them both of them, for what they did to you." She said

"I hate them too Christine" I said and she touched my hand, and I looked at her hand on my how I missed her touch. "I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am monster with monster thoughts and I've led a monster life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough.. And I hurt you which hurt me too"

"Whatever happens in your life, no matter how troubling things might seem, do not enter the neighborhood of despair. Even when all doors remain closed, God will open up a new path only for you. Be thankful! It is easy to be thankful when all is well. A Sufi is thankful not only for what he has been given but also for all that has been denied."

"Christine" I said

"No let me finish Raoul asked me why was with you even when I had chances to get away from you and how could I be with someone who the called a ghost a monster I told him he is the most beautiful creature I have ever seen and it's not about his face, but the life force I can see in him. It's the smile and the pure promise of everything he has to offer. Like he's saying, 'Here I am world, are you ready for so much passion and beauty and goodness and love and every other word that should be in the dictionary under the word life?' How great he is and how he's the one who makes me smile from the inside out"

"You couldn't erase the past. You couldn't even change it. But sometimes life offered you the opportunity to put it right." I said she then touched my face.

"Renew, release, let go. Yesterday's gone. There's nothing you can do to bring it back. You can't 'should've' done something. You can only DO something. Renew yourself. Release that attachment. Today is a new day!" she said

"Today is a new day" I whispered

"Erik I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to make a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your cologne on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close." I said and she smiled at me I saw her tears start to fall and I wiped them away with my thumb. "I love you" She nodded and was about to say something else, until I began kissing her. Her lips were warm and already all kinds of impure thoughts raced through me, and no doubt into her. Her breath was sweet, by taste and smell, from the gum she had been chewing. I slid my hands down to her backside, up and under, and lifted her. She squeaked in joking manner when I picked her up unexpectedly. We both giggled. I stood up with her in my arms and walked us to the bedroom.

Laying her on the bed, I kept my hold on her, and took my shirt off. I was a little chilly at first, but when she pulled me down onto her, the warmth was inviting and comfortable. I knew what she wanted. It is what all of us really want from our lover, and she was no different. I kissed her, starting from between her breasts, and moving slowly down her body an inch at a time.

The closer I got to her pleasure spot, her anticipation and impatience increased. Slow and steady, I reached the top of her panties. She let out a quiet moan as I stroke the outside of her panties with the back of my hand. I kissed and licked all around her pussy, anywhere and everywhere except for there. I spread her bare thighs open just a bit, enough room to rub the inside of one thigh while licking the other. Her moan grew in length so much that it really became a pleasure and tension filled groan. I licked the outside of her panties, and she was looking all crazy, she was losing herself in the moment. The more I waited and teased, the more impatient she became.

"Come on already," she beckoned "please Christian! Please just lick me there already! You're driving me insane!" I slid her white panties off and threw them to the ground next to the bed. Now, she was geared up even more. I wasted no time going to her pussy and, seeing she was wet, it didn't take much tongue work to get her going again. As I curled up my tongue, I slid it in and out of her, repeatedly, stroke after stroke.

Then I did the unthinkable, I put two fingers inside her while giving her head at the same time. I went inside her with them, and motioned them back and forth in a "come hither" manner. Yup, her g-spot. Once I started hitting her g-spot with consistency, she was squealing like you wouldn't believe. She was just about to cum; I could see it. So, I immediately pulled out and stopped everything.

Cupping and licking her sweet pussy until she came. Instead of being loud, she was rather silent. Her body explained everything though. Twisting violently and holding her breath in as she jerked and swerved in the bed, just like when you stretch in bed after waking up. Only this was much more intense. I could feel her go. I could taste it, smell it, and hear it. That lasted about 20 full seconds, a virtual marathon in orgasm terms. I loved her, so it was just as important to me that she enjoy her experience as much as I do. I knew I had achieved my goal. She was smiling and groaning, and then she turned me over onto my back.

"Now it's your turn baby," she proposed. Of course, I didn't mind whatever my sweet Christine wants.

She had me in her mouth quickly I wouldn't say I didn't like it she only did it once maybe twice but I felt like her doing this was so wrong but she didn't. Her tongue and saliva were warm. Every time she caressed the head, I would twitch with excitement. She went up and down my member, kissing, licking, and nibbling the most sensitive areas. She was so into giving me pleasure. That kind of connection can be gotten no other way. Gradually, she sped up her up and down motion, and right as I told her,

"I'm going to cum, stop stop!" I groaned she stopped. She did this over, and over, and over, and over again.

I told her to stop and get on top of me. I was ready. She did just that. Once she was on top, she licked her hand and massaged me with it. I felt every skin cell come alive down there. My God, what could be better than this? She rubbed the tip of me along the outside of her pussy. Eventually, I was in her, and she was slowly rocking back and forth.

"Talk to me," she said "tell me you miss me as much as I missed you baby. Tell me, please."

I obliged. "I missed you so much so damn much my Christine Erik missed you. Faster, faster!"

"Okay, I'll do it, I'll do it, I am, oh my God, here it comes again, oh my G..." she yelled as I reached the falling off point with her. Finally, we held on to each other as we came I exploded inside of her. All the tension, and all the delays made my cum hotter than it ever was as I filled her. She felt that too, and loved it. We kissed and rested in our final position for 30 minutes.

"I love you I'll never hurt you or leave or my son again, I'll protect you both with my life!" I said she lean to my face and kissed me fingers softly touching my face.

"I believe you, I love you too Erik please don't hurt me again… Can we do it again before he wakes up?" she asked I felt myself come alive again. "I take that as a yes" she giggled hugging me tight