Disclaimer: I own none of this! The Teen Titans are not my idea and belong to their rightful and respected owners! Enjoy!

Ch. 11-Past Pains

(Jay's POV)

"You're going to love it here Jay! Well I mean, you've already been here but that was when we were fighting bad guys but now that they're gone you're going to love it here!" Beast Boy rambled on as we made our way down the pier. I could tell he was nervous, so I put my hand comfortingly and smiled again when he paused to take a breath.

"Where are we going first?" I asked.

"Oh well…see I was kinda thinking," Beast Boy looked down at his feet. "That maybe you would go on the Ferris Wheel with me."

The Ferris Wheel again? While my stomach churned at the thought of being on that cursed wheel again, I had survived one attack up there. So I could survive another, if need be.

"Alright," I replied, enjoying Beast Boy's face as it went from surprise to complete adoration.

"Yay!" Beast Boy shouted. "Let's go!"

Before I could even nod, Beast Boy was sprinting toward the entrance of the Ferris Wheel, half dragging me behind him.

When we finally did reach the entrance, Beast Boy took a deep breath and propped himself against the entrance booth. Little beads of sweat were on his face, and his breathing seemed ragged.

"You didn't have to pull me all of that way," I teased. At this remark, Beast Boy instantly rocketed off the wall he was leaning on and took me by the hand.

"That's okay, I'm not tired at all," he grinned widely, then pulled me toward the entrance.

"How many?" the bored voice to the ticket collector asked.

"Two please," Beast Boy replied, his voice going an octave higher than normal.

"That will be four tickets," the clerk put his hand out from the booth.

"Oh uh…" Beast Boy frantically began to search his pockets, unaware that in his dragging me over here, he forgot to get us tickets.

"I have some," I offered, pulling my unused tickets from the previous night and placing them in the clerk's hand.

"Thank you," was the dull reply.

As Beast Boy and I walked up to our cart, Beast Boy couldn't stop apologizing.

"I'm sorry Jay! Completely my fault! I'll pay you back, I promise!" Before Beast Boy could continue jabbering, I clamped my hand over his mouth.

"Beast Boy," I said slowly, unable to hide my smile. "It's alright." With my hand still over his mouth, Beast Boy nodded enthusiastically. After releasing my hand, I made my way up to our carriage and hopped in. Beast Boy followed. For a moment, I wondered if we would have to wait until more people showed up to fill the Ferris Wheel, but then I heard the sound of gears whirring and we were off.

"It's so cool," Beast Boy said in awe as we made our ascent.

"Yeah, it's not bad," I shrugged as I moved a little bit closer to Beast Boy out of reflex. I really didn't enjoy being this high up with something caging me in. But at least Beast Boy was here.

At my statement, Beast Boy turned to look at me, cocking his eyebrows.

"What's wrong?" he asked concerned.

"Nothing," I replied. "It's really nothing."

"Come on Jay," Beast Boy insisted. "You can tell me. You told Starfire."

I recoiled at the jealousy in Beast Boy's voice. Beast Boy always seemed so carefree, it was surprising to see him not happy.

"Well I just told Starfire because…well I just told Starfire," I barked. I just happened to be in a mood to tell her.

Now it was Beast Boy's turn to be surprised. He widened his eyes, obviously hurt, and then looked away. My heart broke.

"Beast Boy, I didn't mean to…it's just that…" I tried to apologize but Beast Boy didn't turn around.

"Whew…okay Beast Boy, I'll tell you," I decided. I didn't want to ruin this date, and maybe telling someone would make it easier for me to deal with.

Beast Boy turned around, a wide smile on his face. "Thanks Jay!"

I cringed as I tugged at the color of my suit. Normally I loved the sleekness of my tight suit, but now I was suddenly feeling hot.

*Calm down Jay, it's your history,* I told myself. *It's your past. You're going to have to share it at some point, you're going to have to-

"Jay?" Beast Boy prodded.

"It's not my fault!" I belted, instantly slamming a hand over my mouth. Beast Boy looked at me quizzically.

"What's not your fault?" he asked as he cocked an eyebrow.

Taking a deep breath, I looked at Beast Boy.

"Beast Boy, my past is…complicated, to say the least," I tried to explain. "It's just going to be easier if I start from the beginning."

Apparently, this was what Beast Boy wanted, because he nodded encouragingly, his eyes widening in anticipation.

Breathing out slowly, I began.

"Beast Boy, I wasn't always a hero. Many things have led me to become who I am today. But I guess where it all began, where my destiny began to throw me into a new world I could have never imagined, was in my little house in Reko City on October 31st, about eight years ago."

As I began to remember that awful night, I paused, worried that I might become emotional like the other night with Starfire. Still, it seemed that I had control, so I continued.

"It was my seventh birthday. My family had thrown me a surprise party and everything. All of my friends came, there was cake, and it was just a perfect example of the life I had. I was average, leading a normal life with two normal parents."

I caught my breath as I thought of the next part. A side of me wanted to stop here, but the imploring yet caring look in Beast Boy's eyes encouraged me to keep going.

"It was that night that…he came."

The air around us seemed to drop as I spoke. Beast Boy frowned nervously; I could tell he wasn't exactly sure who visited me that night, but I knew he had a good guess.

"Slade came," I continued, unable to hide the hatred in my voice.

"But Jay…why?" Beast Boy asked.

"I don't know," I replied. "To this day, I don't know. I don't think I'll ever know. Why Slade chose our house to enter, why he chose my parents to kill, why he chose my life to ruin…"

"He what?" Beast Boy half shrieked, but I just sighed and kept talking, unable to stop, for fear I wouldn't start again.

"He burst in while we were putting away the decorations. I was in the other room when I heard glass smash. There was yelling and cursing and the sounds of smashing. My two sisters, Karina and…Tami were in the room with me. When they heard the sounds they were just as scared as I was, but Karina, my eleven year old sister, was brave. She stepped in front of me, and I stepped in front of Tami, my four year old sister."

I choked back a sob as I thought of my sisters. Karina. Brave, brave Karina, until the very end. And Tami…poor, scared Tami.

*I have to tell Beast Boy,* I thought resolutely. *For my sisters.*

Beast Boy didn't appear to be on the verge of saying anything, so I continued.

"We didn't know what to do. We were each paralyzed with fear, so we just stayed there, standing in the middle of the room, guarding each other. We didn't know what was going to happen next. We were so young…so very young. Too young to hear the low, painful grunt and then the startled cry that we knew were made by our parents.

And that was when the sounds stopped. Just like that, our house was filled with an eerie sense of quiet and calm. But it wasn't totally silent. We could hear footsteps; low and heavy, like a lion crawling through the grass, stalking its prey…waiting to pounce."

Looking at Beast Boy, I saw my green friend had shrunken into the side of the cart, his eyes filled with fear. I kept going.

"The door opened, and a metal boot stepped in, followed by the man you and I know as-

Suddenly a bomb flew through the air, hitting the cart above us. Flipping out of the cart, I kicked away another bomb that was headed for our cart, then turned to Beast Boy.

"Slade."


Okay, so I'm sorry I haven't updated! Forgive meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! But hey, I'm back, and I hope you guys like the chapter. This had a lot of exposition, but next chapter's BB and Jay vs. Slade! Although mostly Jay...cause Beast Boy's gotta go kidnap...

Spoiler! (p.s. the question this week is a spoiler so only read if ya don't mind knowing what happens next, I'm putting it far down so no one sees it by accident)

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Question whatever:

Would you rather have BB capture Robin successfully and bring the Boy Wonder back to the Tower or have BB be caught by the villains while trying to capture Robin?