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EPOV

Godric came by the day after I spoke with my mother. My parents were afraid that I would shut myself up in my house and wallow or maybe go in the other direction and fall back into my old habits. I hadn't actually left the house since mom left and I hadn't been off of the property in 4 days. I was lying on the sofa in my boxers watching TV when Godric knocked on my door. I let him in without bothering to throw on pants.

"Eric, go take a shower and get dressed. We're going out."

I lie back on the sofa and change the channel. "I don't really feel like going anywhere right now Godric."

"That is precisely why you are going to get your ass up and take a shower and come with me," he says as he turns off the TV and pulls me up off the sofa and pushes me towards my bathroom. "Don't keep me waiting or I'm coming in there, son."

Once I was showered and dressed we were off.

We were quiet for several minutes in the car until I finally asked "Where are we going?"

"First we're going to lunch. After that, we'll just see," Godric said cryptically.

We stopped at a quiet out of the way diner. After we ordered our lunch, Godric finally got down to it.

"Eric, is there anything you want to talk about?"

"Like what? Oh, you mean the fact that my father raped my mother and she got saddled with a selfish bastard of a son that basically turned into a younger version of her raping prick of an ex-husband. Sure, let's talk about that."

"Stop it, Eric. You are not Andre. The way you came to be has nothing to do with the kind of person you will be. You make the choices that determine what kind of man you will be," he tells me.

"Yes," I said, "we see how well that has worked for me, so far. I've just been a stellar human being."

"You're right. You haven't exactly been a candidate for sainthood, but you have been making positive changes in your life these past few weeks. Nothing has changed here except that you know about it now. Don't let that knowledge derail the progress you've made, son."

"How can I not let this affect me? How can I just go on like I don't know this happened?" I croaked out.

Our food came and we were quiet for a few minutes while we ate.

Finally Godric said "I'm sure that this will affect you. I'm sure that this information will change you. How could it not? It's up to you, though, how you let this affect you."

I had no response. I just pushed away my still mostly full plate. I had no appetite.

Godric looked at me for a moment before finally making a suggestion.

"Eric, son, what do you think about talking to a therapist?"

I laughed. "Seriously? A shrink? Am I that fucked up that I need to go lie on a couch and talk about my daddy issues?"

"I've made an appointment for you with a therapist friend of mine for about a half hour from now. All I'm asking is that you give it a try for a few sessions. What's it going to hurt to just talk to someone about all of this and anything else you might have rattling around in that hard head of yours?"

I glared at him while thinking about what he said. He was right. It won't hurt me to just go talk to this person and see what happens. At this point I'd probably do just about anything Godric wanted me to do. He was everything Andre wasn't. Godric loved my mother and treated her with tenderness and respect. For that alone, I was willing to try anything he suggested.

I sighed heavily and just nodded my head. Godric paid the bill and we headed to his car. He drove the couple of blocks to the office of his therapist friend. He asked me if I wanted him to walk me in and while it made me feel like a little girl, I didn't want to go in there alone. I didn't necessarily want Godric to be in the room with me while I turned into a crying ball of snot as I unloaded the huge bag of shit that had become my life to a stranger, but I just needed to know that he was nearby. When the fuck did I become a chick? Oh…right…when I found out I was raped into existence. Yeah. I'll probably need years of therapy.

Godric parked the car and we walked in together. Just before the therapist called me in, Godric quietly told me to be honest, not to hold anything back, and to just see where this would take me. The therapist stepped into the waiting room and he and Godric greeted each other and Godric introduced me. Dr. Claude Crane looked to be in his late 40's. He seemed like a decent enough guy. I walked into his office, which looked like a large living room, and sat down on the sofa. Dr. Crane sat in a chair next to me.

"So, Eric, what brings you to my office today?"

I take a deep breath and begin. I tell Dr. Crane about the information I learned a few days ago. I went into how I felt about it. I told him how I felt guilty about what my mother went through. I felt like I was responsible for my mother's suffering.

"Why do you feel responsible?"

"Because my mother had to relive the worst moment of her life every fucking day after she found out she was pregnant with me. Then, when I was born early, because of another beating Andre gave my mother, she had to watch and wait to see if I would live. Then when I did live, I was a constant reminder of that night. As I grew up I always sang Andre's praises to her like he was this amazing god-like man to me and then I started acting like him. I was a dick to my brothers when they tried to tell me what a douche monkey our father really was and my mother had to break up those fights. For whatever reason, Andre was never violent with me, but he was an asshole to my brothers and I was too young to remember what he did to mom, David, and Jakob before we left. Essentially, every fucking day of my life is a reminder to my mother of that night. Then, she had to watch as I treated women just the way my fath…Andre does, without the hitting and raping, of course, but still I've been an asshole."

"First of all, you are not responsible for Andre's actions that night or any other night. That is all him. Second, little boys look up to their fathers. Without you having seen or experiencing any abuse yourself, you had no reason not to look up to him. You did nothing wrong in that either," Dr. Crane told me. "How did your mother treat you all this time? Has she treated you any differently than she treated your brothers? Has she been cold or distant with you? Has she ever given you any indication that she somehow blamed you for any of what she went through?"

"No. My mother is gentle and kind and loving. She treated David, Jakob, and me…and later my sister Pam and younger brother Ben…all the same. Still does. She loves all of us fiercely. She came home a week early from her vacation when my brother called her to tell her that I knew about what happened. She came home specifically to tell me that she loves me and has loved me from the moment she found out that she was pregnant. She told me in no uncertain terms that she doesn't blame me for any of this."

"So I have to ask you again, why do you feel guilty and responsible for something YOU had no knowledge of and no control over?"

"I guess it's just that I wonder if she remembers that night every time she looks at me. I don't want to be an ever present reminder of something so horrifying. Especially not to my mother. She doesn't deserve that."

"Perhaps your mother will join you in a session. Would you be willing to discuss this with her?"

"I don't know. I don't want to cause her anymore pain. I guess I could ask her."

"From what you've told me of her, so far, I think she would jump at the chance to help you let go of this guilt you are holding."

"Yeah. I know she would."

I spent the remainder of the hour telling him how I had looked up to Andre when I was growing up and modeled myself after him. I told him how even after I realized that Andre wasn't the best person to emulate, I still held a sort of grudging respect for him. He was my father after all. I explained how that respect rapidly dwindled over the past several years and how Andre's hostility towards me grew during that time.

By the end of the hour I was feeling completely drained, but very slightly better. I set up appointments for 3 times a week for the next month. I thanked him and walked back to the waiting room to meet Godric. He didn't say a word as we walked back to the car. We were almost back to my house when I finally spoke.

"Thank you, Godric. I don't know how, but you always know what I need. Thank you."

"I'd do anything for you, son."

"I know you would. You always have."

I got out of the car and walked into the house giving Godric a wave just before stepping inside and closing the door. I was emotionally drained. I left a trail of clothes from my door to my bedroom as I stripped down. I crawled into bed and was instantly asleep.

XOXOXOXOXOXO

SPOV

Sunday dinner was odd. I knew Isabella and Godric had come back early from their trip, but they did not come to dinner. Eric skipped it, also. Pam was having dinner at her new place. She had it catered, of course. Having tried her cooking once before, I was thankful that she didn't attempt make the meal this time. I brought dessert. Chocolate pie and pumpkin pie. Everyone seemed a bit more subdued than usual, but we all still chatted and had a nice time together. I was helping Pam clean the kitchen when I started feeling a bit light headed. I thought it was just the heat in the kitchen. While she didn't cook, she did keep some of the food in the oven to keep it warm. I drank a glass of cold water and sat down for a few minutes. Pam asked if I was okay. I said I was. Damn it's hot in here. I got up to go dry the dishes as Pam washed and I swayed. I managed to catch myself before I fell.

"Sookie! Sookie!" Pam was yelling.

I felt like I was in a daze.

"Pam, I'm okay. I think I've just been overworking myself and then with the heat in here. Damn, could you turn the air condition down or something?"

She got me another glass of water and turned the ac down. After a few minutes I felt so much better. I started to get up to help her finish cleaning the kitchen and she yelled at me.

"No way, Sookie. Don't you dare get up! I'm more than capable of cleaning my own kitchen."

"I'm fine, Pam. You know what? I think I'm going to just go on home and go to bed. I'm pretty tired."

"Are you sure, hon? I could drive you," she suggested looking really concerned.

"Don't be silly. I only live a couple of blocks from here. I'll be fine. I'll call you when I get home if you want."

"You better. If I don't hear from you in 5 minutes, I'm coming after you."

I hugged her and got in my car and started for home. I was pulling into my driveway 3 minutes later when my cell phone was ringing. Pam.

I answered "It hasn't even been 5 minutes yet Pam! I just pulled into my driveway. Geez!"

"I was worried," she tells me.

"Well, I'm walking into my house right now. I'm locking the door. I'm walking up the stairs. Now, I'm in my bedroom. May I please hang up and go to sleep now?" I may have sounded a tad snippy.

"I suppose that would be acceptable. Talk to you tomorrow," she said and hung up. I see her phone manners are as horrible as ever.

The next few days were busy. I had work on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday at the accounting firm. I had just sold the first house in my little flipping adventure. I purchased another fixer upper last Friday and needed to get into the house on Monday to decide what I was going to do to it. I wanted to spend as much time as I could studying for the CPA exam. My test date was next week and I was stressing about it.

Tuesday evening I was lying on the hammock outside going over some of my old accounting course notes for my exam. I noticed Eric walk out to his favorite spot on the dock and sit. I watched him for a while. I hadn't really talked to him in weeks, but those damn feelings were still there. Clearly he was going through something difficult. I decided to put an end to this pretending the other wasn't there thing we had going on. I got up and walked out to the dock and sat next to him.

"Hey."

"Hey." He briefly looked surprised to see me, and then turned to look back out at the lake.

After a few quiet minutes he quietly asked "How have you been?"

"I've been good, actually. Things are going really well. I've been working part time for an accounting firm. I'm taking the CPA exam next week. I just sold my first flip. I bought another property and the work starts tomorrow. I've been really busy, but things are going good," I told him.

He smiled and said "Good. You deserve it."

"How about you? How have you been doing?" I asked him.

Eric gave a humorless laugh, brushed his hand through his hair and just said "I'm…uh…aw hell, Sook. I'm going through something right now, but I'm dealing with it and I'll be okay. Business wise everything is great, though."

"Oh. Well, did you want to talk about it? I know we have our issues with each other right now, but I still care about you."

He was quiet for a minute. "You know, I really don't want to talk about it right now. Not that I don't want to talk about it with YOU or anything like that. I'm sure I'll tell you about it at some point. It's just that I've done nothing but talk about it or think about it for days and right now I just want to talk about anything but that."

"Have you seen Pam's new place?" I asked wanting to get his mind off of whatever had him so twisted up.

"Yeah. I helped her move in. It's very Pam."

I laughed. "Yeah. I got that. What the hell is she going to do with all of those bedrooms? No, don't answer that. Knowing Pam I'll need to scrub my inner eye with bleach."

Eric laughed one of those genuine laughs that I love so much.

"Thank you, Sookie. You have no idea how much I needed that laugh."

The tension seemed to melt away and we slipped back into easy conversation about everything and nothing just like we used to. Neither of us brought up any heavy topics. After about half an hour I felt overwhelmingly tired so I told him that I really needed to go inside and go to bed. He stood up and held his hand out to me and helped me up. I started to lose my balance and he pulled me closer to him to hold me up.

"You okay?" he asked me.

I blinked a few times trying to determine whether I was back to normal and told him "Yeah. I'm okay. I just got up too fast is all." I looked up into his blue eyes and was lost in them for a moment.

I shook my head and took a step back from him.

"I think I'm going to head inside, too. I've got some paperwork to work on before I go to sleep. Mind if I walk back with you?"

I smiled. "Not at all."

We walked back to the courtyard together.

Eric turned to me and took both of my hands. He looked me in the eyes and simply said "Thank you, Sookie. I've had a rough week and this evening was the first time that I've been able to relax and just…be." He gave me a quick hug.

"I enjoyed it, too, Eric."

"Goodnight, Sookie."

"Goodnight, Eric."

We head into our respective houses. I got upstairs, got undressed, and fell into bed. I was dead to the world within minutes.

XOXOXOXOXOXO

EPOV

I was momentarily surprised when Sookie sat next to me on the dock, but I recovered quickly. It felt nice just having her there. When she asked if I wanted to talk about what was bothering me I decided that I didn't want to drag her into it right now. Sookie had done so much for me this year. I didn't want her to feel like she needed to take care of me anymore. Not to mention I just wanted to forget about this bullshit with Andre for a little while. Sookie didn't push me to tell her and she and I had a nice stress free chat for a little while. We weren't where we used to be, but it was still comforting just to be near her and just talk and hang out for a little while.

Once I was back inside I went over some paperwork for a case I was working on. I would be meeting with the client in the morning and I wanted to have everything ready. After an hour of going over all the documents in the case, I decided to head to bed.

The next day I was on the go from the moment I awoke. I met with a client. I filed some paperwork at the courthouse. I had another therapy session with Dr. Crane. As I was walking out of Dr. Crane's office I ran into Red…err…Sophie Ann, Andre's wife. She was heading into the salon next door.

"Eric," she said when she saw me.

"Sophie Ann," I responded as I attempted to walk around her.

"Therapy, Eric, really?" she laughed. "I can't wait to tell your father about this."

"Yes, please do, Sophie Ann," I said. "Please tell that abusive rapist prick that you saw his son coming out of a therapist's office. I'm sure that's information he would just love. Excuse me I have a meeting to get to. Enjoy spending Andre's money." I make it to my car and head to meet another client for lunch. I realize during the drive that Andre will likely try to get in touch with me after Sophie Ann tells him about our little run in. Marvelous.

I stop off at each of my 3 investment properties to check on the progress of the renovations. I had dinner with David and Jakob…we were all careful not to discuss the Andre thing. I stopped by Odin's briefly just to sign a couple of things for Pam. I ended up getting home around 9. Sookie's car was in the driveway, but all of the lights in her house were out. I guess she's asleep. She did say she'd been busy lately so she's probably just exhausted. I walked into my house, took off the jacket and unbuttoned my shirt. I relaxed on the sofa, beer in hand, watching TV until I fell asleep. I woke up a couple hours later and managed to drag my ass into my bedroom and fell right back to sleep when I hit the bed.

I was still feeling like crap about everything I had learned, but between the couple of therapy sessions, chatting with Sookie the other night, and keeping busy during the day I managed to keep going. I was determined that I wasn't going to let this shit break me. I knew I was walking a precarious line at this point. I could take my anger and pain out on everyone and be a big prick or I could work my way through this mess in the healthiest way possible and come out on the other side a stronger, healthier, happier person. I spent so long trying to be someone Andre wanted me to be. I could say that I wanted to become the person that my mother wanted me to be or Godric or whoever. But, I was realizing that none of that would work for me. I needed to become my own man…someone that I could be proud of.

XOXOXOXOXOXO

SPOV

Thursday morning I couldn't seem to drag myself out of bed. I just felt run down. I dozed on and off until nearly noon. I finally got up, showered and put on a light sun dress. I went downstairs and warmed up a little bit of soup. I sat on my back porch swing and ate my soup. When I finished it, I just sat there for a few minutes. I hopped up and ran inside when I heard my phone ringing.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Sookie, thank God," Pam responded

"Hey, Pam. What's up?"

"Sookie, I hate to ask you to do this, but Eric isn't answering his cell and I really need a document that I left on the desk in his office this morning. I'm about to walk into a meeting on the south shore and I don't see the damn thing in my file. Will you go to Eric's house and get the financial statement and the statement of condition off of his desk, scan it and email it to me please? I will take you shopping next week and buy you the entire fall line. I can't believe I left that paper. What the fuck was I thinking? I'll have to listen to Eric's whining and bitching for a month about how I could have fucked up the south shore club."

"Calm down, Pam. I'm walking over there now."

I let myself into Eric's house and head to his office. I find the document Pam needs, turn on the computer, scan the document, and email it to her. I wait a few minutes to make sure she received it before hanging up with her. I leave the papers right back where I found them. I was walking out the door when I ran smack into Eric's father, Andre.

"Oh! I'm sorry Mr. Northman. I didn't see you. How are you?" I asked in the sweetest voice I could muster up for this jerk.

"I'm here to see my son," he tells me with a stony expression.

"Eric's not here right now. I will tell him that you came by, though."

"His car is out front. Where is he?" Andre demanded.

"I don't know."

"Don't lie to me you little tart. Ever since you got your little claws in him, Eric has become a sniveling little bitch. He's working for that pansy ass Godric for free. He's seeing a therapist. MY son would never do anything as ridiculous as that. Now tell me where my son is," he says while walking slowly towards me as I back up until my back hits the wall. His face is only inches from mine.

"I had no idea about any of that. But if Eric is in therapy, you can bet your ass it isn't because of me. What kind of father walks away from his son when he's in the hospital not knowing whether or not he'll ever walk again? What kind of person does that make you? Don't you dare try to blame Eric's issues on me! If he feels the need to see a therapist, it's because you've been mind fucking him since he was a child. Now excuse me." I try to take a step to the side and go around him.

He grabs my arm hard, turns me around, pushing my face into the wall and twisting my arm behind my back. "Listen to me you little bitch. I've had enough of you. You are going to stay the fuck away from MY SON. He doesn't need his little nursemaid anymore."

"I have hardly seen Eric in weeks. He isn't home. I swear I don't know where he is, but I will tell him you came to see him. Just let me go," I was trying not to sound as afraid as I was.

I could feel Andre's breath on my neck. He reached around and palmed my breast roughly. He let go of the arm behind my back and he started pulling my skirt up while grinding into my backside.

"Perhaps I should see for myself what special talent you possess that can turn a man into a weeping little pussy," he whispers in my ear.

Oh hell no. This wasn't going to happen. I stomped on his foot and rammed my elbow into his stomach and turned to run to my house. I only made it a few feet before he caught my arm and spun me around.

"You little cunt!" he yelled. He pulled his arm back and punched me in the face so hard that I stumbled backwards off of the top step of the porch and fell, hitting my head first on the railing which hurt like a bitch then on the bottom step before sliding the rest of the way to the ground. I lay there stunned, my vision was getting foggy. I see Andre walking towards me with a sneer. He leans down close to me and tells me "One way or another, you will stay away from my son. You make him weak and I won't let that happen." He stood up and kicked me once in the side before walking out of the courtyard. I tried to push the fog out of my brain so I could get up. I rolled over and began crawling slowly to where my phone fell. I reached out for my phone and just as I put my hand on it everything went black.