Shelagh's response to the letter in chapter 6. I included the letter so you don't have to look back.

Patrick's letter:

My dear, Sister Bernadette,

I hope you are feeling well. I hope your comfortable and that you find enough things to do to occupy yourself and avoid boredom. I am sure the sisters and midwife friends visit you often but your presence is truly missed by all our staff and patients at the clinic.

Timothy received your picture and accompanying note today. He read it to me and it was such a joy to hear your words. I am glad you received my letters and am content to wait for as long as you need to respond. I know such a change in your life cannot be decided upon lightly so please take your time and do what you feel is best.

It has been so many months since I dropped you off at the sanatorium. Since I cannot see you, I reflect upon conversations we had. You are such a lovely person, inside and out. The wimple does nothing to hide your beautiful face and your bright, shinning blue eyes. You are such a loving, caring person, with everyone you are with and you have a smile that lights up the whole room. I believe you could also be the mother Timothy needs. You have often stepped in where he has needed someone and I could not be there. You took care of his arm when I was busy with patients. You took my place in the three-legged race, when I was called out, so he did not have to miss it. That meant a great deal to me. You are everything a lady should be and you have a wonderfully charming wit. It still makes me smile to think of when you said there was "no need to amputate" your hand for a scrape.

Your hand! Perhaps it was wrong of me to kiss your hand when you are not free to be kissed. Somehow, at that moment, I had to express what I feel for you. I was not sure but I thought you might wish to know that I cared, in case you have considered that your future happiness may not be with the order. I thought of speaking to you but could not find the words. Either way, it would have been crossing a line. I almost did consider speaking, when we were talking about what was needed for the clinic. It was at that moment when Timothy came rushing in.

So, take care, sweet lady and I am sure you will be given the "all clear" very soon. I hope very much that it will not be long until we see each other again.

With love and fondest regards,

Dr P. Turner


Dear Doctor Turner,

I just received a new letter from you. It was so beautiful! I am so glad Timothy read to you the note that I wrote. I did manage to sneak a message to you after all! I wonder how you are and how dear Timothy is doing. I do miss that fine lad. You are a wonderful father. It must have been tough for you, raising him by yourself since your wife passed away. He is a credit to you and to his mother.

At the sanatorium, I try to keep busy with handicrafts, reading or playing board games with the other patients. I have visitors quite regularly but it would be so nice to be back to a normal life, whatever that is now.

Well, I have quite a bit of news! The X-rays showed no active disease! Praise the Lord for His mercy and for the doctors and their triple treatment! Also, I truly feel that God has led me to make a decision. It is not right for me to continue as a nun. My heart is not in it and although I love God utterly and completely, I am also undeniably in love with you. I cannot be content in my life as it is, when I could have both God and you. I have asked Sister Julienne to send me some clothes to wear. I suppose I will be giving you these letters in person after all, since I am to be discharged next week. I long so much to see you again and soon I will.

Now that I am decided, I am to be called Shelagh and am no longer "Sister Bernadette". I am free to love you and tell you so. It is so hard to say when I first realised I loved you. At first, I admired your dedication to your work and your patients but I found myself thinking of you more and more until I found that I was anticipating every opportunity to see you. When you asked me to have a cup of tea with you, I declined but, in my heart, I wanted to sit and chat with you and get to know you better. I tried to deny it and hide my feelings but, that day at the clinic, when we were talking about the spirit lamps, I think I failed to hide it. I must have since the next time we were in that kitchen you kissed my hand. I thought of that moment so often since then. Everything in me did not want to turn my back on you but I had to because of my vows to God. I am so glad you did it though. It has given me a wonderful memory to treasure during all these months of not seeing you.

I will have to go through some procedures, when I get back to Nonnatus, to renounce my vows. It is a bittersweet occasion, as I do love the Sisters. However, I will be free to love you and that gives me so much joy that my cup runneth over.

God bless you!

Love,

Shelagh

More to come. Please review if you have the time. Much appreciated!