Disclaimer: I don't own Junjou Romantica.

Warning: DEATHFIC!

Regrets

He heard them – two loud gunshots – followed by a deafening silence. Then, he felt his face and body hit the cold floor. Thick, warm liquid soaked his undershirt then his coat. He tried to lift his hands, tried to move, but he could not.

"… sa… gi…" he tried to call his lover in between labored breathing. It was intended to be a yell, a scream, but it ended being whisper. Is Usagi-san alright? Was he hurt? He had to know. Because, the last time he saw him, a mad fan was screaming at the renowned author, waving a gun in front of him.

He had an inkling, a feeling, that the mad fan will pull the trigger. He ran, as fast as he could. But, every step seemed so slow. Then, he saw it. The trigger was pulled and it was too late to stop him so he jumped to the space between his lover and the mad man.

And… here he was, lying on the cold floor. He could feel every second that his breath was being taken away.

"…ki."

The last syllable of his name. No matter how muffled and distant the sound was, he knew that voice so well. It was Akihiko's, the low, cool voice of Akihiko that would always send him delight – whether it be in the bedroom, in the living room, in the kitchen. Damn the perverted author for converting him into a pervert.

"… saki!"

The sound was growing louder. He felt his body being turned around and lifted from the floor; strong and slender arms, wrapped around him tightly. He felt a cold hand touch his face, urging him to open his eyes.

Those long slender arms that would always make him feel secured and loved. The first time he felt them around his torso, he was being forced into cumming – in Akihiko's bed. He would gladly go back to those days.

"Misaki! Oh god, Misaki!"

Open your eyes! Open your eyes! He told himself. He wanted to see Akihiko, make sure he's not hurt. And with what little strength he had, his lids slowly opened. His first sight was Akihiko's soft purple eyes. Just by looking at those eyes, he could tell that he's the only man he will ever love.

Love.

How many times had he told Akihiko he loved him? He could count them in his fingers. If he knew this day would come, he would have said those words everyday that they were together.

"Su…"

When did he feel it? When had he fallen in love with Akihiko so madly? He wished he had told him that very same day that he loved him. When was it?

"ki…"

It was the day Akihiko kissed him beside the street lamp, under the falling snow. Right then, he had felt love but he was too stubborn to admit it. He wished he had said it then. And the day after that. And the day after that. And, it will not be enough until he had said it a thousand times. Why does have to be so damn shy? While Akihiko was able to say it, straight-faced, all the time.

"dayo…"

He smiled weakly as he breathed out the word. He felt a lump in his throat and everything was beginning to blur, including Akihiko's face. He wanted to see him clearly for the last seconds of his life. He wanted to memorize his face so he could never forget even in the afterlife.

"Suki…"

It was a vow. He will love Akihiko even in the afterlife, for all eternity. He will wait for him in heaven, it's a promise.

He breathed in deep, trying to fill his lungs with air. His body was growing numb by the second and he knew, he felt, that he's dying. But, he will die happy, knowing that Akihiko's unscathed and alive, happy that he was able to tell him he loved him for the last time.

"No, Misaki. No… Please… I'm begging you." Akihiko's voice quivered. Was he crying? Misaki could no longer tell because his vision was growing darker and darker. He had never wanted to hurt him, never wanted to make him cry. He wanted to live for him, to be together with him for a while longer. But, he knew, he felt, that he wouldn't last long.

He gasped for air. But, for some reason, he felt like it didn't reach his lungs anymore. His lids felt heavy, closing on their own accord.

"Su… ki…"

Every day of his life, Akihiko had made him happy. He had showered him with love and affection. He had made him happy, sad, mad and insane. He had stirred emotions he didn't know he was capable of feeling until he had met him. He had his dreamy, fluffy, pink love and it was all thanks to Akihiko.

Does he have any regrets? If there is, it was being unable to tell Akihiko how much he had loved him. In another life, if he will see him again, he will tell him how much he had loved him.

"Su… ki…"

He breathed out. Then, there was nothing but darkness.