Chapter Eleven

Ichigo woke up the next morning rested, but at first he nearly yelled out in fright. He didn't realize where he was at first. He put his hand to his chest and panted several long breaths and remembered he was with Sosuke. He didn't know why but he was already calling him that in his head instead of Professor Aizen. For some reason, hearing about his sexual exploits as a teenager had made him very familiar to Ichigo. After all, if someone as upstanding and good as Sosuke had been promiscuous when he was younger, then Ichigo wasn't such a terrible person for the things he had done. So, in a way, it made him feel like sex wasn't something to be ashamed of. His mind, however, could not get that he hadn't consented to anything. He still held onto the firm belief that he had let them have him even though there was no way a thirteen year old could possibly consent.

He got up and went into the bathroom, finding a stocked shower and spent a very long time in it. His body still ached in many places, chief of which currently was his back. He was sure it was from lying in the hospital bed for so long. It was too soft and it wasn't what he was used to sleeping in. He slowly got out of the shower and looked in the mirror. Most the bruises were fading now, and he was wondering vaguely if he would end up having any more. He honestly couldn't imagine having a relationship with another human being that didn't involve him being beaten and bruised. He couldn't wrap his mind around the idea that pain wasn't a part of love, because Mabashi had hurt him but he still loved him.

At the thought, Ichigo's eyes filled with tears. Not at his own pain, but sudden stabbing grief at Mabashi's death. He should have died and then Mabashi could have gone on and found someone better than him. He swallowed, reaching down and turning on the sink. He washed his face, the cold water helping the redness in his eyes from the tears. He wasn't going to cry in front of Sōsuke. Sōsuke was a good man. He was a strong man. He was everything Ichigo was hoping he could be one day.

He dressed slowly and smelled something really good cooking. He frowned and quietly opened the door and looked out. He heard Sōsuke humming in the kitchen and could hear the sound of food being cooked. He felt his stomach growl and chewed his lip. He didn't realize he was hungry until he smelled it. He swallowed nervously and crept out of the room quietly to peer into the kitchen. Sōsuke was wearing his pajamas (pants that were white with blue stripes and a solid blue tank). Ichigo blinked, realizing that Sōsuke was quite muscular. He could see the defined abdominal muscles and realized he had really thick biceps. He always wore suit jackets and slacks at school, so it was hard to tell that he was really quite fit.

However, the most interesting thing to him was that he had tattoos. And he had a lot of them from what he could see from his position. He was facing away and he could see that he had a full sleeve down his left arm that ended about an inch above his wrist, just enough that when he wore long sleeves like he usually did it was impossible to see. In fact, Ichigo realized he never had worn short sleeves that he'd ever seen. Written in beautiful scrip among the cherry blossoms was "Senbozakura" in a way that it flowed with the tree limbs. Among the tree blossoms and leaves, there were other images worked tastefully into it. A beautifully designed woman sat on a swing dressed in a red flowing caped robe, her face hidden. When he moved enough, he saw that there was also a snake winding its way throughout the cherry blossoms. Unless he got closer, though, he couldn't see anything else since he was standing with his left arm facing him, but he could tell there was something on his other arm.

"Are you going to watch me cook all morning, or are you coming to eat breakfast?" Sōsuke said, looking over his shoulder.

Ichigo jumped, not realizing that his host had any idea he was there. "Um, sorry, I just…I wasn't sure if…if you wanted me to come…come in."

Sōsuke shook his head, dishing out two plates smoothly and setting them at the small table. "Come, sit, you need something that isn't hospital food."

Ichigo couldn't help but pause, but he moved forward, the smell too much to stand. He sat down and stared at a full plate of food that was real food. He paused and then looked up to Sōsuke already eating his food and reading something on his mobile. He looked up and smiled at Ichigo.

"Eat, Ichigo, before it gets cold," he said, smiling.

"Um, you have tattoos," he said suddenly, then winced, pinking in his cheeks a bit.

Sōsuke looked up at him and smiled. "Yeah, most from my college days, but not all. It's a record of where I've been, you see. The things that make my heart stronger, good or bad, you know."

Ichigo slowly started eating and then glanced at the arm. "What do they mean?" he said softly, looking at the incredibly beautiful work.

Sōsuke smiled, holding up his left arm. "Well, the cherry tree and blossoms are for my Senbozakura, the first person to every hold my heart in his hands, Byakuya. The woman in red, that's for Kisuke, and the snake is for another, a man named Gin Ichimaru," he said, gesturing to each in turn. "Then," he said, showing him the other arm. "These masks represent the faces that people wear," he pointed to a set of white masks that were fanned out, each one making a different facial expression. "And, the flowing river, that's a river of changed, because we can all change and become different people, for better or worse," he said, indicating the base of his right sleeve which was a long and winding river down his arm.

"They're so lovely," Ichigo said, reaching out tentatively to touch Sōsuke's left arm where the cherry blossoms descended. "To do this, you must have loved him a great deal…" he said quietly.

Sōsuke shrugged. "I did, when we were together, he was the only thing that mattered to me. But that was a while ago. I mean, not very long, I'm not that old," he said with a chuckle. "But long enough to have come to be able to appreciate all the good he gave me."

"But…you said he broke up with you…didn't that…hurt?" he asked, frowning.

Sōsuke nodded. "Of course, it felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest, that's when I got the tattoo."

Ichigo frowned. "After he broke up with you?"

Sōsuke nodded. "I decided that there was so much good in what we had, that I wanted to remember it for the rest of my life. The same with Kisuke. Though, I did add his tattoo while we were together. The same with Gin. These, they are my story, you know?" he said smiling. "I don't often show them to people."

"You should," Ichigo said, fingers gently moving up his forearm touching each and every colorful line of ink. "They're so amazing…"

Sōsuke swallowed and smiled at him. "Your cousin and his roommate will be coming by later. They wanted to take you out for lunch with them and maybe see about getting you a phone."

"I don't have money, though," he said, frowning.

"That's okay, your uncle is providing it for you," Sōsuke said smiling, finishing his food.

Ichigo shook his head. "No, I don't want him buying me things."

"Ichigo, it is for your own safety," Sōsuke said, his voice taking a harder edge. "A phone would go a long way to making sure if something happened while you were alone someone could be there to help you quickly. To me, it is essential."

Ichigo's eyes widened a bit and he stared at him, having never heard him take command like this. He nodded immediately, then finished his food, not wanting to look at Sōsuke anymore. He would see the blush dusting his cheeks if he did. Afterward, Ichigo retreated to his room and hid. He didn't want to even think about talking with Sōsuke again because just knowing the things he was learning; it made him want something else, and he had no idea why.

-oooooo-OOOOOO-oooooo-

At close to one, the bell rang and Sōsuke called Ichigo out of his room, dressed now in a pair of tan slacks and a long sleeved t-shirt, reading a book on the couch. He looked up as Ichigo emerged, wearing a t-shirt and jeans. Uryū and Chad were standing inside and Ichigo once more was taken by how big the dark skinned man was. He hid his tremble as he smiled tentatively at them both. He crossed his arms and held himself.

"Ichigo, how are you feeling?" Uryū asked as his friend stared impassively into the apartment.

"Um, f-fine. Slept well, still sore and…and getting used to this," he said trying to keep the tremble out of his voice.

Uryū nodded and gestured for him to follow. "Come on, my father wants to make sure you get a good phone and we thought we'd take you to a nice pho restaurant that's near the phone place."

Ichigo nodded, following Uryū but being very uncomfortable because Chad walked behind him. He couldn't help it. He felt vulnerable as it was, and then to have this very big friend of Uryū's near, it just felt way too familiar. He swallowed, remembering Choe and a couple of the other larger "partiers" that had come to visit him and the others. He shivered uncontrollably for a second.

"Are you cold, Ichigo?" Uryū asked, glancing over to him as they got to the car.

Ichigo shook his head and tried his best to smile as he slid into the backseat. Chad drove and Uryū got into the passenger. "Chill, that's all," he said, sighing, watching the world go by.

After a few minutes in the quiet car, they pulled into an electronics store. Uryū took the lead as Ichigo just marveled over the amazing phones that they had. He vaguely remembered Uryū asking him questions, but he didn't even know what they meant. He had seen some nice phones, of course Ryo and Yoshi had nice phones, but he'd never thought of owning a hand me down let alone a new phone. While he was looking at a few of them, he saw Chad standing near him and almost yelped. He chewed his lip and tried not to imagine how violent someone his size could be. He swallowed and turned around just as Uryū handed him a phone and proceeded to snap a watch on his wrist.

"What…?" he said, looking up at Uryū.

"Well, I know you aren't used to carrying a phone. So this is a set. This is a smart watch, and its connected to the phone, so even if you don't have the phone, you can still send messages, listen to music, read email, monitor your heart rate and use the pedometer…all sorts of stuff. See, I have one too," he said, holding up his arm to show off a watch similar to the one he'd given Ichigo, but the band was silver with small stones set in it.

Uryū didn't include the other features that were included in the extremely high tech set. For one thing, it was equipped with two types of GPS locators, and the plan was under his name, giving him full access to anything to do with it. He didn't intend to give Ichigo that information, but he also wasn't hiding it. If Ichigo found out on his own, then fine, he'd deal with it, but he wasn't going to put out there that he'd just equipped his cousin with something that he could track him with anywhere in the world, having even activating several features that would act as emergency beacons should something happen to him.

Uryū had grown quite protective of his cousin since he'd been in the hospital. He felt guilty, somewhat, for not having done anything, knowing of course that he was a child himself when his cousin was taken in by those monsters. He didn't intend to lose him again. He could see that he was in no way aware of anything that his new phone and watch could do, but he'd teach him over lunch.

"Alright, we'll go eat, and I can show you how to use these," he said smiling fondly at him.

Ichigo nodded, not sure what to do with these things. He knew how to use smart phones, well, he knew how to make calls and text on them, but that was about it. He didn't even have anyone's phone number yet. They ended up in a large pho restaurant that was really quite nice. They even had to wait to be seated.

Ichigo picked up the menu, sitting with the other two at a square table across from Uryū and beside Chad. He was already nervous, and sitting beside the larger man made him even more nervous. It wasn't like he thought Uryū's roommate and friend would do anything, it was just his sheer size reminded him of several less than happy encounters in his household.

"This is too much," he said, blinking at the prices. "I mean, this is expensive, I can't…" he said, looking across at Uryū.

Uryū smiled. "Ichigo, my father is a doctor. He has expressed interest in making sure that you are treated well and comfortable. He is your uncle, you know," he said smiling as the waitress came to take their order.

Ichigo nodded and quickly ordered something, not really seeing what it was, just to get the girl's expectant eyes off of him. Chad, speaking for the first time that Ichigo heard ordered, and despite himself Ichigo flinched, knocking his utensils to the floor. Uryū frowned and looked at him and Ichigo swallowed, trying to play it off that he was clumsy and apologizing for it. Their food came soon, and Uryū told Ichigo about the things that went on his life, talked about his friends and the sort of things he did for fun, told him about Yoshino and the four-plex they lived in. He told him about Ho and Ban and how Koga took care of them. He mentioned that a man he knew named Coyote Starrk had purchased the large Uttagawa house and planned to renovate it. Ichigo ate silently and listened as he spoke.

"Ichigo, you've eaten only half your soup," Uryū said, concerned when he glanced over to see that Ichigo had already put down his spoon and was staring at the bowl.

Ichigo swallowed and thought about anything he could talk about. It wasn't like there was much interesting that had ever happened that didn't have to deal with drugs, sex, and pain.

"I…uh, appreciate you buying me lunch, I just…I'm not used to eating so much in one day, and Sōsuke…ah Professor Aizen, he made breakfast…" he said, looking over at the Uryū and Chad who had both finished their soups and a side order of sashimi they had shared.

"That was early, Ichigo, how much are you used to eating?" he asked, frowning in concern.

Ichigo shrugged. "I…well, it just depended on what we could hide, you know. If…If I could get to the kitchen, I'd take whatever I could carry and we'd hide it downstairs. There was this loose board in the floor, down there, and we had pried it up and dug out the dirt under it so we had a hiding spot…" he looked distant as he spoke. "She…she never did find it, which was good, because if she'd ever found out there was food down there…" He paused. "I would get caught a lot though, so I never really got enough for everyone. Sometimes I was lucky, and when I went up, everyone was asleep, you know, and I'd grab rice cakes, crackers, sometimes there would be leftover food on the counter that no one would miss."

Ichigo picked at the skin on the back of his hand thoughtfully. "But I wasn't always lucky, sometimes Yoshi, she'd catch me in the kitchen. If she wasn't too lit, it wasn't bad, but sometimes…sometimes she would be in a mood…and playing with her guns. She wasn't careful, that's how she shot Caine, was really by accident, but…but it wasn't the first time she shot someone like that, just the first time they had to hide it…" he said. "She…she'd use her guns too, to scare us, sometimes she'd hit us with them, you know, and sometimes when she was really in one of her scary moods, and she caught us she'd make us watch her load them and then…use them in…on…I mean on…" he said, catching himself, eyes wide.

Uryū blinked and glanced at Chad. "You…Ichigo, are you meaning what I think you are?"

Ichigo shook his head and looked away. "No, no, I don't know what you mean, just…" he muttered, not even wanting to think about it let alone tell someone else. "Sh-she beat us with them, that's…that's what I mean…she threatened us with them…pistol whipped…p-put the hot barrel…" Ichigo's voice cracked again no matter how hard he tried not to let it.

Ichigo looked at him. "Don't look at me like that," he said quietly, looking at his hands again. "Please, I can't stand that look."

"Did you tell the doctors this? The police? Professor Aizen?" he asked, frowning.

Ichigo shook his head. "It doesn't matter."

Uryū leaned over closer and spoke barely above a whisper. "You're telling me that this crazy bitch raped you and the others with a loaded handgun and you don't think it matters?"

"No!" Ichigo said, shaking his head, and scrambling to his feet. "Just…leave it!" he said, seeing the bathroom and making a dash for it because he was going to throw up just thinking about the few times it had happened, or that he had watched it happen and couldn't stop it. He hadn't been able to protect the others all the time, no matter how hard he tried, and that more than anything was gut wrenching to him.

He dropped to his knees in the stall and tried to control his stomach. He didn't want to throw up. He had to get control of himself. It was too much though, to think about these things that happened to them, the things that had become so common and normal that he didn't even think about them. Now, though, that it wasn't normal, it was sickening to think about in so many ways. He spent so much time trying to convince himself he was willing, he wasn't forced, he had let them have sex with him. That's what happened, he had convinced himself because then he felt like he'd given himself to protect the others. He'd given up his own dignity to save theirs. But he hadn't always been able to do that. And when Uryū said it, when he actually thought about it, he realized no one would ever let someone do that to them. No one, no matter how hard he tried to convince himself of the fact. He didn't want to be a victim. He wanted to be strong.

He was sobbing in the stall and didn't hear the outer door open, and he definitely didn't hear the lock click.

-oooooo-OOOOOO-oooooo-

Candace leaned hooked arms with Bazz, her on again off again lover. She wouldn't call him a boyfriend; after all, the best thing about him was his ability to fuck her into oblivion. When she wasn't trying to scratch his eyeballs out of course. However, to their disappointment, they came to Karakura Town for the weekend to find that Yoshi and Ryo was gone. Their house was closed up, and no one was there. It looked like no one had been there for more than a couple weeks. It was annoying; she always enjoyed smoking up with her and watching her beat the living shit out of those brats she kept. Also, it kept Bazz from being too violent with her if he got to fuck the hell out of one of her boys. The boys weren't as delicate as the girls, and he got off on Candice watching him fuck them anyway. Of course, she got off on it too.

So, they'd stopped in a pho place for food since they couldn't get high. They'd been quiet, already feeling the need for a hit coming on them. So when they looked over and to their surprise saw one of Yoshi's brats sitting at a nearby table, they had both been curious. They didn't recognize the two men with him, and he obviously was the same kid they knew. The orange red hair was a dead give away.

"The fuck, Bazz?" she asked, glancing at him.

He shook his head, frowning. "He shouldn't be out in public unless he left her."

"You don't think she got busted?" she said, softly, looking around them.

Bazz shook his head. "No way, she had fucking blackmail on half the police force and most the judges. No one was going to touch her," he muttered.

"But how would he get away, then?" she said. "She said he was her special one, the one she liked torturing the most because he wanted to take care of the other little shits. She wasn't gonna let him go."

Ichigo got up and took off toward the bathroom and Bazz smirked. "I can find out, one way I know to get that little shit to talk…" he muttered, standing and following him. Candice smiled and nodded, leaning back in her chair.

Bazz followed him into the bathroom, a smaller one, two urinals and two stalls, and the outer door locked so if there was a family they could use it as well. He smirked, hearing him sobbing in one of the stalls. He wanted to know what happened to Yoshi and Ryo, but he thought he'd have his own fun too. He quietly walked up to the stall, using his fingernail to twist the lock as quietly as he could. It opened, and the kid was wrapped up in his own self he didn't hear it, or notice when it swung back.

Ichigo sighed and sat up, trying to collect himself. He was about to stand when he felt a hand clamp over his mouth and saw glittering blade flick in front of his eyes.

"Ichi-baby, how you doing?" came a voice he hadn't heard for a while. Bazz.

He swallowed convulsively, holding his hands over Bazz's where it clamped against his mouth. "See, you can imagine me and Candice's surprise to find out no one is at your house. Everyone's all gone, locked up tight, so that has me wondering what happened. So we think, maybe she moved the operation. I mean, really, she had so much dirt on the cops, they weren't going to go for her. But then, wait a fucking minute, how is Yoshi's favorite little fuck slut out and about by himself if they moved the operation?" he asked, sliding the black over the skin on his face gently, not cutting him. Yet.

Bazz pulled his hand off his mouth. "What happened?" he whispered in his ear, holding the knife close to his throat with one hand while his other slid around and started to undo the jeans he was wearing.

Ichigo was panicked but he knew better than to not do what he said. Bazz liked his knife, and more than once had used it on them. He only liked the boys though. "She-she g-got busted…she…she and R-ryo ran…they're gone…I don't know where they went, please, just let me go, I don't want…"

The point of the knife pierced his throat enough to let a trickle of blood flow down his front. "No, no see, that can't happen," he said, sliding Ichigo's jeans off his hips and then pushing him down flat on the seat of the toilet. "I don't believe you, so let's see if you got a different story in a couple minutes," he muttered, and Ichigo wanted to scream, but he still hand the knife against the small of his back now.

"Now, you be a nice, quiet little fuck-slut, and I might let you get up and walk out of here without your two boyfriends knowing that I had my way with you in here. You think they'd like to know that you can't even go a few days without a fucking dick in you?" he muttered, positioning himself and pausing to trace the knife down Ichigo's spine.

Ichigo shook his head. "No, no," he muttered. He did not want Uryū to know about this, but he wasn't willing. He wasn't protecting anyone at all now. He wasn't going to let it happen like this.

Ichigo started to yell out for help but Bazz reacted fast, reaching up and using his free hand to slap it around his mouth and yank him backwards onto him in one move, slamming into him with more force than he would have liked. He screamed against his hand, mostly in shock, but more than a little in pain. Then everything seemed to explode around him. There was a loud thumping sound, something cracking and then he was falling forward, barely catching himself before faceplanting into the toilet seat. He gasped, feeling hands on him again.

"Stop, no, don't!" he cried out, pushing hands away from him and scrambling to get away.

"Ichigo, its Uryū!" he heard and looked up to see Uryū's face instead of Bazz.

Despite himself he grabbed onto him like he was going to disappear. He could hear something outside the stall but he didn't want to know what was happening, he just held onto Uryū, who had taken his sweater off and covered Ichigo's lap with it while he waited for something. Finally he looked up to see Uryū's roommate standing in the open doorway of the stall.

"We need to get him to the hospital," Uryū said softly.

"No!" Ichigo said, shaking his head. "T-take me back home, I'm fine, really, just take me back to S-sosuke's…"

Uryū frowned. "Come on, let me help you," Uryū said quietly, helping him stand up and watching as he fumbled with shaking hands to get his jeans back on.

Uryū couldn't help but notice the blood running down the inside of his thighs as he pulled on the clothes. The fact that he was used to having this happen, and that going about his day afterward wasn't much of an issue bothered Uryū greatly.

They came out the door to see that the man with the red floppy Mohawk was standing at a table with a woman with long green hair yelling at the manager. Ichigo froze, recognizing the woman as well. She stopped in the middle of her insistence that they call the police because her boyfriend was assaulted in the bathroom by Chad and came around and glared at Ichigo. He shook in Uryū's grasp.

"Well, well, if it isn't the biggest little whore ever to live?" she said with a grin.

Ichigo's eyes went wide, blood still dripping down his chest where Bazz had cut him. Uryū looked to see Chad staring at her.

"Leave him alone. You and your friend have done enough," Chad said, looking between them.

Bazz came over, his eye black, and his nose still oozing blood. "What? You can't seriously be angry that I was fucking this slut? It's all he's good for, being the whore that he is."

Ichigo ducked his head and turned away from Uryū. It was Chad, though, that reached over and pulled Ichigo into a protective grip, surprising him with the gentleness in the huge man's touch.

"Leave here, before I make you leave. He is not what you say because he never asked for what he went through," Chad said, ushering Ichigo from the room while Uryū left his name and number with the manager along with Urahara's number for them to call and report the incident.

Ichigo lost the ability to stand as soon as they got out the door, starting to heave breaths and grabbing onto Chad to keep him steady. "Easy," he said softly and helped him into the car. "We will get you back to Sōsuke."