I know I left the last chapter in a hanger spot. So let's go back for a quick chapter and see what's up in Edd's head. Shall we?

Heads up!: This has mature contexts through out this whole story plot. If you are sensitive to sexual scenes, strong language, drugs and alcohol use, or anything of that nature. Then I suggest not to read this.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything other than the story plot.

Chapter 11.


Fliers, brochures, letters, and everything in between. Almost all the colleges that I have applied for have sent me acceptance letters. Along with my dream college, and the college Kevin and I have been planning to go to together. It had the best sports academic around, and a decent science one. This was Kevin's dream. Shortly after our first "I love yous." He started planning everything out.

He was for sure going to be accepted to this college, and he was, and I promised to follow him with wherever he goes in life. He found what apartment building he liked best for us to move into. What part-time jobs we could have while going to college together. He even planned out date ideas by looking up the local entertainment scene. This was our plan together. To finally be open as a couple and living together in peace.

But now with this acceptance letter in my lap from my dream college. That sweet sweet dream Kevin and I had now started to have a bitter taste. Even with my grades being at the top of my class, and working as hard as I humanly could. I still did not believe I would get accepted to my dream college. One with the best science labs around. What I could do with all that knowledge at my finger tips. I could achieve any one of my dreams and goals. I could achieve all of them if I so pleased. But could I allow my dream to out shine our dream?

How much of that dream was truly mine though? A college I had no interest in, living in an area that is too busy and rowdy for my liking. The only truly pleasing part about that choice was being able to live with my Kevin. As much as I wish I didn't have to say this. But was that truly enough to make me truly happy? I do not know. I know that it should. But my heart and my mind are conflicting each other.

"Maybe he'll understand."

No Edd! Stop thinking like that! You promised you would follow Kevin!

But that was before all of this toxic started spilling into our relationship.

Here I am. Staring at two acceptance letters. Two empty envelopes. One of them will be sent out tonight to further my future. And as much as it may kill me. I know what one I need to fill.

And I did. I cleaned up all the papers from the coffee table, putting them into a neat pile to put in the recycling bin. I picked up the now filled envelope and steadied my nerves as I walked out the door, placing it in the mailbox. From here on, I am now a student to the college of my dreams. What an odd feeling that left in the pit of my stomach. A feeling of pride and grief all mixed together. No clear line of it this was the right or wrong choice. But my mind is made up, and it's too late now.

I did not allow myself to hang my head in shame, even though part of me wanted to as I walked back into the house. I held myself with pride and I was proud, this is the choice I wanted. This is what I've been battling with for weeks.

But that proudness soon fell to guilt as I opened my bedroom door and saw my lover there, sleeping peacefully in bed. How could I do this to him?

"Surely if he loves me, he'll understand, and we will work things out."

Was that too much of a hopeful dream for something that will probably end so tragically? Possibly.

I crawled into bed with Kevin, studying his peaceful, sleeping face as he took in slow, deep breaths.

"I can always tell him some other day."