XI.
A Cut from the Fight
A week and three days had passed. A very long week and a very long three days. Mary felt drowsy in the hot sun and leaned her head back against the tree, her eyes drooping ever so slightly. There was no shade, but the shadow the hull casted and she didn't want to be over there right now. Edward was there, fishing out in the water. He had taken some wood from the ship and created a makeshift spear to help them survive. While there were lizards and small mammals on the island, they didn't want to hunt the creatures to death so that left fishing and gathering.
Mary wasn't so keen at fishing, so she left Edward to do that while she half-napped in the sunlight. Her skin was burnt and red, the shirt she had taken from that man already becoming worn from her stay here. It didn't help that Edward paraded around in nearly nothing but his skivvies most days. He didn't want his robes to get ruined any more than she wanted her clothes to get ruined. So she really couldn't say a thing about that. She just tried not to stare at him too much. He was beginning to seem…tempting.
Truth be told, Mary was no nun. While she denied herself some things, including sex, it didn't mean her eyes didn't wander every once in a while. Right now, in the drowsy mid-afternoon sun she just shut them to keep them from wandering too awful much.
"Mary?" A hand on her shoulder woke her. She opened her eyes to look into Edward's.
"Hm? What is it Kenway?" She muttered, her eyes drooping shut again.
"You shouldn't sleep in the sun. You'll be burnt before an hours gone by. C'mon. To the shade with you, lass." She was reluctant to move but he pulled her up to her feet and helped guide her over to the shade. How could it feel so much cooler there? It felt good. It also woke her up a little though when Edward walked away, she dozed again.
She let herself lay in the shade a while, cooing herself down. Edward was doing who knew what. Their relationship was rocky at the moment. They fought every single day since they'd been here. Most of their arguments were petty but they had two good shouting matches that if one had not turned away would have probably turned into a brawl. Mary wasn't against giving Edward a good licking to make sure he knew his place. She had already given more than one lad his needed beating. She thought of Javi and the brawl they had. She wondered if he still held a grudge. She didn't anymore, not unless he did something else to try and hurt her. She remembered his low jabs with some bitterness.
It's just like you to trust a man who'll let you down, eh, Mary?
You always trust people who are going to let you down, who are going to hurt you or break you.
She closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them to look at the clear sky above her. Was that true? Did she always trust people who were going to hurt her? Who were going to let her down? It hadn't been his fault that he let her down…She covered her left eye with her hand, fingers gently touching the scar there.
"You okay, Mary?" Edward was suddenly leering over her. She looked up at him and removed her hand, laying it by her side again.
"What's it to you?" She asked, annoyed. Her thoughts were dark and she didn't particularly want Edward bothering her at the moment.
"Just worried about you. I know we had a bout yesterday…are you still mad?"
"Mad that a lad like you can yell louder than me?" She snorted, sitting up. "Hardly" She leaned back against the hull of the ship, pulling her knees towards her chest. She looked up at Edward as he sat down next to her.
"Lad? I'm a bit old to be called a lad by you, eh?"
"I'd say I'm of perfect age to call you a lad." She told him. "I'm a bit older than you think Edward"
"Is that so?" He asked.
"I have to play it younger, else men will wonder why I don't grow a mane like the scruff you've got all over your face" She glanced at his face, which was showing a scruffy beard. He wasn't shaving here of course so it was only natural.
"I suppose that's right. You can't grow a beard, can you?" He rubbed his hand over the scruff on his face, as if making a point about her bare face.
"And that's why I play the role of a lad only seeing his twentieth year. Not many will say a thing if my face is clean day after day." She realized she was trusting him with more knowledge about herself but what was the point of hiding it all anymore? Edward wasn't going to judge her. He hadn't so far at least.
"And, if I may ask, how old are you?"
"Twenty-Six." She answered. Born in 1691, in her mother's home right outside of London itself. She didn't tell Edward all of that, but he paused. He seemed to be thinking about it and then a smile crossed his face, as if he found something amusing.
"I always did like older women" She laughed and he did too. It felt good to laugh. Much better than it felt to fight. She hoped that was all over now, that they could just get along. It would be so much easier on both of them, she thought.
Mary wasn't sure how the fight started; she just knew it got bad quickly. It was just after dinner, though it was still light, it was getting dark. They stood, not five feet apart, hurling insults at one another. She had no idea why and later she wouldn't be able to find the start of the fight. Maybe it was just that their blood burned too hot in the sun or that they were both tense, sunburnt and ready to get off this blasted scrap of land. Mary though, much, much later, that perhaps the fight was caused by her talking about the Assassins to him. He tired of hearing about them and it soon ignited into a full blown fight.
"And how do I know that these Assassins of yours are the people they say they are? How do I know that you aren't the ones who are out to control the world? You kill people! You admitted you do!" He screamed at her.
"Us? Us, the ones out to enslave the world? You know our Creed, Edward! You know me! How the bloody hell could I be a pirate who sought to enslave the world? Do you hear yourself? You sound like a damned fool!" She yelled back.
"I'm a damned fool?" He laughed, but it was a bitter sound. "I'm a damned fool with my talks of mystics and ancient wars. Yes, I'm the damned fool. I think you and your Assassin friends are a bunch of loons, squatting in the jungle. You all are delirious!"
"You're delirious, Edward! Our Order is further spread than these islands! We're all over the damn world"
"Well that gives a man a lot of comfort – to know Assassins may dog me for the rest of my life. I don't understand why you even told me of your secret society!"
"I was trying to save your life! I should have just let them kill you! You're nothing but a greedy, foolish dog of a man!"
"And you! You're a coward, Mary. Maybe I'm ruled by greed but at least I can say I got mettle to my being. You though, you're a cowardly woman, hiding in the boots of a man!" She froze, wondering how he could dare to say that. "Too afraid to show your true colors to everyone. Why? Because you're ashamed of yourself. You're ashamed to be a woman! You're nothing but a coward, Mary!"
She had no reply because she attacked him, her temper once again getting the best of her. Perhaps it was just her temper or perhaps it was this damn sunburn and the hot days and the cool nights and the temptation and just everything. Thing was, Edward had just as much brawling experience as Mary did. Perhaps more. Mary had not begun truly brawling until she had begun sailing and it was a few years into it at that. Of course, she had begun sailing when she was thirteen, but still. Edward was good at fighting. He was able to throw her off once, twice and he gave her as good a licking as she did him. Finally he threw a punch at her, which she easily dodged – a good thing too. He was wearing his hidden blades and he had engaged them when he had punched. By accident or on purpose, it did not matter.
They both froze, looking at the deadly sharp blade, only inches from Mary' s cheek. The air of anger was shattered in a moment.
"M-Mary, I wasn't…I didn't…" He stuttered, dropping his hand, backing away.
"Save your breath for someone who cares" and she stormed to the other side of the small island to lick her wounds in her own company. Edward did not come after her.
Mary slept by the fire that night and she was woken in the morning by the sunlight on her face. She threw her arm over her eyes but groaned and sat up. She had sand in places there shouldn't be. She began to brush it out of her hair when she saw Edward coming out of the hull. She was still a little angry with him but she knew she couldn't hold a grudge, not here. She moved away from him to forage for shellfish and he went to do some finishing. They didn't speak for a long time.
Eventually she had caught four small crabs and figured it was time for a break so they could eat something. She walked back towards Edward's favorite fishing spot, carrying the crabs carefully so she didn't get pinched.
"Edward. Take a break." She called to him. "I caught some crabs."
He came onto shore and she gave him two of the crabs. They broke their legs and ate the meat out of them in silence. Then they ate some of the leftover fish from the night before, again in silence. Afterwards, Edward looked at her, a frown on his face.
"Are you okay?" He asked finally. She didn't answer. "I mean…after out fight yesterday. I know I…" He didn't go on for a moment.
"If you're going to say 'I know I hurt you', save your breath. From those bruises you're sporting, I know I did my fair share of harm as well." They both had a count of bruises on their persons. Edward had a few on his face, arms and chest. Hers were mainly on her face and arms. He must have had better aim that her. "I can tell you that you can brawl like a man who knows a tavern too well"
Edward smiled, a twitch of his lips. "In my youth I was known to find my way into a tavern or two"
"Oh? And you found yourself into a brawl or two while there, right?"
"Aye" He smiled at her now. The fight was behind them now and they had silently agreed not to talk of it again. "You seem to have known a bit about brawling yourself. Though, so many of your scars don't look like they be from brawling"
"No, they're not" She agreed. He waited but she didn't go on. He sighed.
"Jaysus, Mary!" He spat in the sand. "You never do like to talk about yourself! Why keep the secret? It's not like I'll be judging you for anything. If you're worried about that, that is. If anything, I respect you all the more with every fact I find out about you"
"Respect me more? Could've fooled me" She quipped.
"You know what I mean!" He growled. "When I found out you was a woman, I was shocked. But I respect everything I heard you've done all the more. Women are supposed to be weaker but here you are, strong as any man I know. You have more balls than most men and you have to search for 'em in another person's trousers"
She kept silent, an amused smile on her face. He paused and looked down at the sand.
"All I'm saying is that…you really can trust me Mary. I ain't going to tell anyone your secrets. I value having balls too much for that."
"What do you want to know?" He paused, probably wondering if she were joking or not. Maybe he was just trying to think of the question he wanted answered the most. She waited, looking up at the sky.
"Why are the Assassins so important to you? You always talk about them as if they're the most important thing on this Earth. So why do you favor them so?" That question shocked her, it really wasn't the one she anticipated. He looked at her expectantly though and she figured she might as well answer him. She didn't have to tell him everything but this question certainly wasn't easy. Still…She could trust Edward. He hadn't told a soul that she knew of about her really being a woman.
"When I met Ah Tabai in Spanish Town, I was new to the West-Indies. I had just arrived in fact. I…I had nothing left to live for. I was just searching for an excuse to go on or to die." She admitted. It was hard saying that, but it was the truth. "I didn't join the Order right away of course. He tested me, seeing if I would be good for it. I did join though, he trained me, helped me better myself and my views on the world. I did leave the Order for a time to help with Nassau but I went back"
"Why?" Edward pressed.
"It gave me that reason to live I so desired, that I so needed at that time. I had a…course for myself. I had people who cared for me, people who were there to help me. I had a purpose."
"Every pirate has a purpose" Edward tried to argue.
"I wanted something more than rum and fighting and treasure. I wanted a higher purpose, a calling so to speak. When I met Ah Tabai, I was in a very dark and dangerous place. It took me years to completely come out of that cursed hole…It's thanks to the Assassins that I'm still alive. They mean so much to be because I owe them my life. If it wasn't for me joining, I'd probably be dead or I'd be much the same as Jack"
"You mean Rackham?" Edward laughed. "A cursed drunk who doesn't know the bow of a ship from his ass?"
"Perhaps. I might have even ended up in a brothel. Who knows…" She shrugged. "It's no use thinking of 'what if's and 'could be's. This is where I am now and it's the only course that matters. That ever mattered." Edward was silent for a long moment. "That satisfy your curiosity for the moment?"
He didn't answer, just got up and walked away. She watched him. She wondered what he thought of her admittance. She knew what she thought about it, she had shown clear weakness and she felt suddenly vulnerable. Naked, so to speak. At the same time, she was…at peace – she was happy it was Edward she had told it to. Somehow, she felt like he could understand her pain. Perhaps it was their fight yesterday, but the air seemed to have cleared a little. It felt a little easier to breathe.
She stole glance over where Edward was on the other side of the island. She could see him clearly, though he was partially blocked by a bush. She wondered what he was pondering but didn't bother to go over and bother him. Just because the air felt a little clearer didn't mean another fight wasn't on the horizon, waiting to boil over. It was better to let him think and ponder while she tried to avoid any thoughts as all.
A/N: Thank you for reading! Hopefully I can get one more chapter edited and published today.
