Chapter 11 : Kiddo
Hey everyone ! So it's finally the holidays and I can't wait to go to London tomorrow omg ! I hope you'll have a nice break, same for Christmas with your family/friends.
I don't really know if I made the good choice between worse/worst so if you know how to choose between the two, please tell me. :)
Don't forget to review to tell me what yoou liked about it and what are my mistakes because don't forget that English isn't my native language.
Love from France.
"Hey kiddo ! What are you doing here on your own ?" Deeks asked when he came to the living room to find his daughter, Sophia, sitting on the couch while looking at the photos album. The past seven years had been tough and unforgettable for the three of them. First, there were their job at NCIS which became more complicated when Sophia arrived because Kensi and Deeks started to be more afraid of never coming home. It always had been an uneasy job but when it was just the two of them, they could handle the pain, the distance, the losses and the death. They were built for this. They were adults after all so it was easier for them to live with this kind of feelings but for a child, it was way more harsh to cope with the loss of a parent or an uncle. Because yes, their co-workers were Sophia's family too. They all loved the little girl and took her out most of the time. Plus, it was hard for Kensi to let her child to her mother when they had to go undercover because, even though time had flown, she wouldn't be able to trust her with all her heart. Kensi was afraid that Sophia would end up disappointed by Julia like she had been when she was a kid. That was hard for her, and Deeks was aware of this so when his own mother could, she had the little girl until they came home. Sometimes Nell and Eric would babysitt her with their own son. Because, finally, they admitted their feelings to each other a few years ago. It was a surprise just for them because the rest of team knew something was going on from the beginning. They just needed enough time to see it. But it wasn't the only difficult things to deal with for this family. Despite the healthy pregnancy, Kensi had to give birth under very bad conditions. Deeks wasn't there, there was no hospital and most importantly, no medicine to calm her. She didn't want to talk about it after, because she had been strong enough to give birth and her baby was safe and sound. That was what mattered for her so Deeks let her breathe and gave her time. At first, he tried to talk about it with her but it was like he talked to a wall everytime he tried so he figured out she would come to him whenever she would be ready. Don't mistake yourself, these years were also fulfilled with happiness and joy especially when they were at home just the three of them. They had more good memories than bad, that was for sure. And they thanked God for this every single day of their lives.
"You never told me how you met mom." Sophia asked her dad, still looking at the photographs, when she heared him coming towards her.
He sat beside her and then put her on his lap to be able to look at them with her. It took him just a glance to see that she was staring at their wedding pictures. He could remember this day perfectly ! It had been one the best day of his life. Of their lives. They chose to do a tiny wedding with their friends and co-workers who became their family after so many hard times together. Sophia wasn't born yet but was on her way and it couldn't have been more perfect. Sometimes, when things turned really bad for him because of his job, he remembered this day to think about something beautiful instead of pain and sadness. It always helped him to get through it. Well, thinking about Kensi's smile always helped him to get better.
"Well, my little ninja, you know mom and I are supposed to arrest bad guys together right ?" He waited for her to nod, gazing at him with her big blue eyes. Sophia was a mini Deeks with her blue eyes and blond hair. But she was like Kensi when it was a matter of temper and feelings. "So a long time ago, I came and started to work with her to help and protect her. Even though you know mommy doesn't need anyone to protect herself. She's a real kickass !" Deeks laughed a little bit thinking about how much his wife was independent. They were the same on this point. They both thought that they could count on no one but their own person before meeting each other. That was what they learned from their crappy childhoods. And then, they met and they understood that we all need someone to get through life. They started to be this person for the other one, in order to let go of this bad habit.
"What did you tell yourself when you saw her for the first time ?"
"I knew she had been through hard times and I understood why she was mean to me, because I wasn't really welcome you know. I always had a bad timing. So I started to make jokes to make my own place among the team. And especially to make her laugh. All I wanted to do was make her laugh because when I arrived, she wasn't really a smiling person. I remember thinking that she was beautiful. She didn't even try to look good and that's what make her perfect to me. You could notice her in the room even when she stayed quiet. She was like a light. Yeah, that's it. She would light up the whole room just by her presence. I loved this about your mom. I still do, by the way. So I wanted to make her smile because I was convinced she could be even prettier with a smile on her face. And I was right."
"Was it a success then ?" The little girl asked. "I bet it wasn't. Your jokes aren't that good, dad. You have to know that." She tried to hide her laugh for a moment but couldn't do it for too long.
Deeks made a face as if he was hurt and then laughed with her. "Well you do look like your mom on some point when you talk like this. But no. It wasn't a success at all at the beginning. She wasn't laughing, talking or smiling ! I think she was pretty upset to have me as a partner. I was childlish during that time. But it went pretty okay after that and we fell in love with each other." He kept turning the pages to remember everything that had happened to them, with the biggest grin on his face. One day, he decided to take a photo of everything because making memories was truly important. There were pictures of every Christmas, holidays, events from their life. He loved it.
"You miss mom, aren't you Soph ?" He couldn't help but notice that his little girl wasn't as smiling as she usually was. In general, she was laughing and running everywhere. She always wanted to do something and couldn't remain quiet for more than an hour. So, seeing her like that made him miserable. But he couldn't do a damn thing about what bothered her. He felt so useless in these kind of situations and that was horrible !
"Obviously." She looked at him again with slight tears in her eyes. "But I understand why she's doing this you know. It's just that..."
"It's just that it's Christmas and you want her here." He hugged her tightly to let her know that he was here with her. She wasn't all alone. "Maybe she'll come back before the 25th. Everything is possible you know how it works."
She sighed because she knew very well what undercover job meant and she hated it. A part of her loved it, because her parents helped to save people and make the world a better place and that was awesome ! But the other part of her really hated it because sometimes, she wanted her parents just for her. She wanted to come home after school and find them coming from the office like the other parents. She was lost and didn't know what to think of this situation. It was even worse when Kensi was in another country, like at this moment, because they could spend weeks before talking to each other. Even Deeks who knew what it was like, thought that sometimes the distance was the hardest thing to handle. So you can imagine how it was for a little girl. Especially during Christmas.
The entire house was in the dark, no sounds, and Deeks was drinking a beer in front of a football that he wasn't even watching. He was just lost in his own thoughts. Kensi and him always made their best to come home for Christmas and birthdays since Sophia was born. When it was just the two of them, they could manage to be alone for a birthday. They knew they would have more together but it's totally different for a child. So it was a pomise they made to each other the first night they spend with the little baby girl. Despite the undercover cases they may have to do in the future, they wanted to be there for everything together.
He knew she was doing everything in her power to be back in time but he also wanted her here. He was missing her so much. This case started a month before and it was already too much. At least, Hetty did what she could to make him stay at home with their child. He couldn't be more thankful for everything she had done for them since the begining.
When Deeks heared noises coming through his left, he jumped from the couch with his beer on one hand and his gun on the other. But it wasn't a burglar or a killer. It was her. It was Kensi.
She was finally home.
He could breathe again as if he had stopped the moment she left for Afghanistan again. He was terrified that she would come home more broken than she was the first time she went there. Even though she left a few years before; he could see that the things that happened to her changed her forever.
"You made it." Deeks said in an undertone while getting closer to her. He hugged so tight and closed his eyes to be able to take a moment just for him.
"We promised, right ?" She waited for him to nod before letting him go. Deeks looked at her face, arms, hands. He looked at her whole body to make sure that no harm was done to her. She had some scratches on her face and seemed exhausted but she was fine. She was fine and here with them.
"I'll go kiss Soph. Wait for me." She started to whisper too.
He sat back on the couch and smiled so much that it hurt him. She was home with them and that was all that mattered. They had made it through another year without too much damage together.
