Beyond Grim And Evil Installment 1: So It Begins
(A/N: I have decided to put up two chapters today, just so you know. Enjoy.)
Delgado's Charge (Lunch)
Hoss Delgado slumped low in his couch, moping and watching the television. There was nothing for him to do. He hadn't been called in for a job; he hadn't even seen a monster recently. Frankly, he was depressed and unbelievably bored. He reached into a bag of chips and munched them. Just then the phone rang. He glanced at it as he chewed on the mouthful, debating whether or not to answer, or if it were worth it. Probably some salesman, but the only voice he'd heard recently was his mothers. He sort of wanted to hear another. He swallowed then picked it up, unenthusiastically saying, "Hoss Delgado, spectral exterminator, taking care of all you monster troubles yadda, yadda. What do you want bub?"
He sat bolt upright as an authorative voice answered, "Your mission, should you choose to accept it Hoss Delgado, is to hunt down and bring back the Boogeyman on the president's orders."
"Wait, what! Why? Why does he want the boogyman, why? Tell me!" Hoss ordered.
Paying him no heed, the person continued, "If you accept, come immediately to the Whitehouse. There, everything will be explained to you in due order. If not, this conversation never happened."
"I accept," Hoss determinedly confirmed, jaw set firmly.
"Good, we shall await your presence forthwith," the voice stated. With that, the line went dead.
Hoss blinked at the phone, then leapt up exclaiming, "Hoss Delgado's back in the game, baby!"
"Hoss, keep it down out there!" an old woman's voice called.
"Mother, I'm going out!" Hoss replied.
"Dress warmly dear, and don't forget your lunch," his mother called back.
"Yes mommy," Hoss agreed. With that he raced to get ready.
Meanwhile, Billy and Mandy approached the small trailer. Mandy knocked on Hoss Delgado's door. All at once it was shoved open, crushing Billy, and outlining the figure who looked far too massive to be living in a trailer and still have space for himself and his mother. Hoss spotted Mandy and frowned, asking impatiently, "What do you want, little boy?"
"For the last time, I'm a girl!" Mandy shot, highly annoyed.
"I'm not!" Billy exclaimed, crawling out from behind the door, bruised.
Mandy dragged Billy up so they both faced the man. "Listen Hoss, we have a problem," Mandy began.
He cut her off, though, saying, "Not right now. I have to answer a call from the president."
"I haven't called you yet," Mandy remarked.
"Not you! The other president," Hoss replied.
"Ooh, ooh, can we come, please, please, please!" Billy begged.
"Not a chance. You'll slow me down," Hoss replied.
"Do you want to be turned into a Sasquatch again?" Mandy threatened in a growl.
Hoss blinked, then replied, "Darn, you have me. All right fine. Get in the truck, and try not to get in the way." With that he leapt into his huge truck. The children followed him. Glancing back at them, Hoss stated, "Fasten your seatbelts kids. It's gonna be a bumpy ride," With that, he punched it, and the truck tore over the countryside on the way to the President. Mandy cried out in terror, very rare for her, and clung to the seat like a cat. Delgado was insane! He drove like a maniac! They were crashing through everything! Was he even trying anymore? She was not prepared to die so young. She still had so much potential, so much ahead of her! Billy whooped and hollered in unbridled glee. For a moment she even hoped Delgado would crash and send Billy through the window. If nothing else, the boy would at least learn that crazy driving wasn't fun.
They screeched to a halt in the Whitehouse yard, truck belching smoke like a fire. The door was kicked open on Hoss' side, and Delgado leapt out determinedly. Billy jumped out saying, "All right, let's do that again!" When Mandy jumped out, however, she fell to the ground, dizzy and feeling sick. Strange, since she'd never gotten sick on any ride, under any circumstance, or for any reason before. Billy blinked blankly at his friend, then pulled her up, saying, "Come on Mandy, it wasn't that bad."
Mandy shook her head vigorously, shaking off the dizzy feeling and regaining her land legs. Expression back to normal, she said, "Come on, let's get this over with." As they walked towards the Whitehouse, Mandy stated, "Hoss, we have a problem."
"What is it?" Hoss asked. "Something to do with a stray monster?" he hopefully added.
"Something like that," Mandy confirmed.
"Ooh, ooh, let me tell the story!" Billy exclaimed. Before Mandy could protest, Billy launched into the story of Jack 'O' Lantern. Hoss listened in disbelief, looking down at them in shock. Finally finishing, Billy said, "And so we lived happily ever after."
"Idiot!" Mandy barked. Turning to Hoss, she added, "Jack's come back Mr. Delgado. Fredburger followed him up and told us about it. We have no idea how he got out, though. No one would help him. He must be in cahoots with somebody, but we don't know who, and until we find and question him through painful torture we'll never know. Think you can help us catch him?"
"Blasted monsters. Revelling in the pain of others," Hoss said. He sighed deeply, adding, "This is why I got into this business kids. Helpless mortals falling victim to twisted creatures like the Grim Reaper and whatnot. Poor Jackie boy never stood a chance. A perfectly good human, and now they've turned him into one of them!" Hoss remarked, sniffing.
"Forget sympathizing with him. He's a monster now!" Mandy declared. "Will you help us or not?"
"I'll help you. Before this Jack creature gets the chance to warp another unsuspecting mortal like he once was into the web of the monsters. They must be stopped and destroyed!" Hoss declared.
"Grim is still off limits. As long as you get that through your head, we'll be fine," Mandy stated firmly, icily, possessively. "The Reaper is mine, and no one touches him but me."
"And me!" Billy exclaimed, jumping in. Hoss grumbled under his breath, but he didn't bother protesting. He was used to the reaper, and Irwin, Fred, and Jeffy now too, he supposed. That didn't mean he would spare the other creatures, though.
Soon enough the three stood in the president's office. "Mr. President, the name is Hoss Delgado, spectral exterminator extraordinaire. What do you need?" Hoss questioned.
The President rose, answering, "Ah yes, Mr. Delgado. I'm extremely grateful you accepted my charge. You see…" he trailed off then looked sheepish, but continued, "I'm really rather embarrassed to admit it but, well, recently my son hasn't been feeling scared. Now normally that's not a problem. He's growing up and he's a brave lad, but when I say scared, I mean he's not scared of anything. That's bad, because whenever he's doing something wrong, we threaten him with the boogeyman legend. That's usually the sure-fire way to get him to listen, you see, but now it's not working. It's almost as if all fear has left him! He won't go to bed on time, and he won't listen when we tell him to stop doing something dangerous. He won't even stop sucking his thumb anymore," the president narrated.
Mandy scoffed, almost laughing. Billy stated, an amused smirk on his face, "The boogeyman? He ain't scary."
"I hate to inform you Mr. President, actually I don't, but the boogeyman hasn't been operational for a long time. My friends and I took care of that," Mandy stated.
Lincoln thought about inquiring further, but soon opted not to. Instead he asked in a dark, secretive tone, "Have you ever felt scared little ones?" Startled at this question, neither Billy nor Mandy answered. They exchanged glances with each other. That, they hadn't thought of, and they weren't ready to complicate this more than it needed to be. They'd won, that was it. There was no gray ground, was there? No. There couldn't be. The Boogeyman was done for, and that was that. "Never mind," the president said, seeing they wouldn't answer. Going back to normal, he added, "The point is, I was never a fan of the Boogeyman myself, but circumstances have changed. I never thought I'd need fear, but I do. I want someone to find the boogeyman and bring him back so I can give him a stern talking to. How dare he abandon parents in need! My kid is driving me nuts! You, Delgado, are the man for the job. For the good of your country… oh heck with the country, for my good and sanity, will you help?"
"Consider the boogeyman as good as caught compadre. Come on kids, let's get this Boogey," Hoss Delgado stated, cocking his arm.
"I get boogie's all the time!" Billy exclaimed. Abe, Hoss, and Mandy looked blankly at him, then frowned.
"Now all we need is a way down to the Underworld," Hoss mused.
"Ooh, I know, drive off a cliff!" Billy exclaimed.
Mandy and Hoss blinked blankly, then Mandy slapped Billy viciously. Turning to Hoss, she replied, "How about a less fatal way. Don't worry. We have just the thing."
"We do?" Billy asked. Mandy smirked at her best friend conspiratorially.
