Sanchez and Irving arrived home a little later with their brother. Epstein stepped inside and looked around in a bit of a daze.

"What are we doing here?"

"We brought you home, Juan." Irving said.

"Oh right."

Epstein left the doorway with his head hanging down. He headed straight for the family room, not knowing that his brothers were following him and keeping a close watch on him. He walked in a confused, zombie like state, much like he had done during the few days following his mother's death. His brothers watched him sorrowfully, both feeling as though they were headed for another round of helping him get through the day while he reentered autopilot mode.

They watched as he moved to the nearest empty chair and slowly sat down. Then they listened sadly while he quietly prayed in Hebrew. It wasn't often when h would pray. And he would normally only do it during times of personal crisis.

While hearing him pray right then, after just suffering a bad breakdown, they knew just how serious this was. They also realized that he must have had some sense of what was happening right then.

When he finished praying, Epstein started trembling. He choked up as though trying not to cry. This caused his brothers to be on full alert and prepare themselves for another breakdown.

"Ma!" Epstein cried out. "Ma where are you? I need to talk to you!" He stood up and started to leave the room.

"Juan where are you going?" Sanchez asked, starting to follow him.

"I need to find Ma. You know where she is?"

"Yeah in her grave." Irving said quietly before receiving a warning look from Sanchez.

"I'm not kidding." Epstein said "I really need to see her right now. Where is she?"

"Juan… Ma isn't here."

Fran entered the room right then and went straight for him. "Juan, calm down. Ma isn't here."

"Where is she?" Epstein turned toward her, clearly frazzled and confused. "I need to see her. It's important."

"Juan… she's…. she's out." Fran choked on her words, hating herself for not being able to be honest with him.

"Will she be back?"

She bit her lip nervously. "Sure, Juan. Come on, why don't we sit down?" She guided him over to the couch. "Hey, I heard you had a bad day. Sounds like you were having a rough time on your way home. You want to talk about it?"

He nodded a little. "I just… I got scared. I don't know what's wrong with me. I started seeing these images… I couldn't make sense of any of it. I feel like it was something bad that happened where I was. But I…" He closed his eyes and tears started to fall. "I need to see Ma. I need her."

"Ma isn't here. But we are. Please Juan, you can talk to us."

"I'm really scared… I don't understand what happened to me. I was walkin' home. Then I started having these…. Flashes of some kind of horrible memory. I tried to block it out but…" he sniffed "I saw groceries spread all over the sidewalk and in the road. I heard people shouting." He covered his face. "It scared the hell out of me but I don't know why. I just… I got so overwhelmed… Next thing I know Sanchez and Irving were there. Then we were home. I don't even remember how we got here."

"Oh Juan…." Fran brought him into a hug. "It'll be ok." She said soothingly, rubbing his back. "You don't have to worry about those memories. We're here with you."

"I need Ma, though."

"I know." She teared up. "I know, Juan."

...

For a while after his last breakdown, Epstein went back and forth into reality. He would often ask about his mother and her whereabouts, claiming that he needed to see her. During these times, he was often confused and almost scared like he truly had no idea what was going on or what was causing him to be so emotional. His family didn't know what to do whenever he was in this state and they often, sadly, went along with his delusions so not to upset him any further. It broke their hearts seeing him this way. It hurt even more not knowing how to help him.

He had become a bit clingy to his older sister Fran. Nobody could figure out why, other than the fact that she was the oldest of his sisters, and she treated him in more of a motherly way. The thing that hurt her was whenever he would call her "Ma." That was purely because she wasn't sure if he actually believed she was their mother. She tried to correct him, but often found it easier just to let him call her that.

One afternoon, Fran was busy folding their father's clothes in her parents' bedroom. She jumped a little when she heard a bit of a frantic knock on the door. She quickly shook off her startled state and continued to fold clothes.

"Come in!" She glanced over her shoulder and saw her brother, clearly upset, standing in the doorway. She became upset when she heard what he said next.

"Hey, Ma, are you busy?" he entered the room, keeping his head down.

"Juan, I'm…" She refrained from correcting him, as painful as it was, and continued folding a shirt. As much as it hurt not to correct him, it hurt her even more just knowing the state of mind he was in.

"Well, Ma, I need to talk."

"Oh well come on. I can take care of these clothes later."

They sat next to each other on the bed. Fran even pulled him in close with an arm around his shoulders. She let him rest his head on her chest. As they talked, she tried her best to give motherly advice, because she knew he needed that the most right then. But at the same time, she couldn't help but be more of a sister to him. She watched him as he opened up to her. This was the most emotional, most open and honest she had ever seen him, without him bursting into tears or even seeming desperate for food. On one hand, she was glad that he was opening up like this, because she knew how hard it was for him. On the other hand, she couldn't help but wonder how in touch with reality he was right then.

After a little bit, he had brought her into a hug. There was a trace of a smile on his lips as he did this.

"Thank you." He said. "I guess I didn't realize how much I needed to talk."

"Like I said, come find me whenever you need someone. I'll listen."

"Thanks Ma."

Her heart sank and her face fell a little. "Juan…" she sighed, her heart breaking.

"What?"

"Never mind. I hope this helped you."

"I think it did."

If she wasn't sure about her brother's state of mind before, his next move sealed it for her. She knew for sure that he believed he was talking to their mother, because he did something that he had only done with their mother. He leaned in and kissed her gently on the temple. As he left the room, she sat there, tearfully. She felt defeated. Tears broke through and she choked up a little on them. She knew more than ever that her brother needed help that neither she, nor the rest of the family could properly provide for him. She had no idea what to do to even bring this to his attention. He was not well, and it was beyond depression and beyond his eating. But due to the rest of the family's own grief, Fran knew that getting him the help he needed wasn't going to be easy. In her heart she knew that he was going to need to reach his breaking point, and when he actually did, it would be hard. It just hurt way too much to think about when that day would come. So in the meantime, she felt it was best to wait it out like they had been doing.