Chapter 10
"Aro, did you send her?"
Edward and I burst into Rosalie's room at top speed. The door slams with a deafening smack against the wall. Rosalie jumps and spins to face us, the phone still in her hand. I hear a voice speaking from the other end, but I can't make out the words. Before I have time to act, Edward charges across the room and grabs the phone from Rosalie. She is too startled to react, and instead stands as still as a statue, her eyes wide. Edward throws the phone onto the ground with a growl. It shatters into hundreds of pieces and leaves a large dent in the wood of the floor.
He turns to face Rosalie and she shrinks back against the wall. The look in his eyes is menacing, like liquid fire. If I didn't know better, I would say that he is the one that controls the flames.
I can tell from his stance that he is going to attack her. I large part of me rejoices at the idea. I can even picture myself pitching in and burning her to an unrecognizable pile of ashes. But, the smaller more rational part of my brain is the part I decide to listen to. I flex my mind and the shield that still surrounds Edward changes. It becomes a restraint, no longer flexible protection. His eyes widen when he realizes that he can't move, and I walk to stand in between him and Rosalie.
"Relax, Edward," I say softly.
He growls in response and I know what he's thinking. How can I stop him from destroying her when she almost spilled my secret to the very monsters I need to keep it from? But the key word there is almost. She doesn't know about my fear about the Volturi. She didn't tell Aro my secret. Granted she would have, but she didn't. I understand her motives. She wants to protect her family. I can't blame her for that. She understands better than anyone how dangerous I am. The rest of the Cullens should have called the Volturi the moment they found out about me.
I am about to explain this to Edward when my attention is diverted. The Cullens have caught up to us. Alice dashes into the room with the rest of the family close on her heels. Alice looks angrier than I ever thought possible, and she too looks ready to charge Rosalie. I act instinctively and throw up a barrier between Alice and Rosalie.
Jasper looks mad, but only because Alice is upset. I think part of him acknowledges the reason in Rosalie's actions. He isn't going to attack, so I let him be.
Esme and Carlisle are too kind to attack one of their own, so they too need no restraining. Emmett dashes forward, but his motivations are different. He crouches in front of Rosalie and bears his teeth at Edward.
Edward growls in return and tries to break through my shield.
"Stop it," I tell him forcefully. He looks hurt at my words, so I step close to him and backtrack.
"I appreciate you standing up for me, I really do, but I will not let you hurt Rosalie. She was doing what she thought was right. You know about my fears because I told you in the forest; Rosalie has no idea about the consequences of her actions. If I wanted it to happen, she would be dead right now. I don't need you to fight my battles," I say softly. I put my hands on his shoulders and brush my lips across his cheek very lightly. His body relaxes and he nods. I relax the shield, but keep my mind alert enough to tighten it back up at a moments notice.
I turn towards Alice, thinking that her anger is second only to Edward, and that I might have to talk her out of doing something rash as well. To my surprise, though, she doesn't seem to care about what's happening around us. I've gotten used to her visions, but this time is different. It doesn't look like she is watching something play out. Her eyes are moving back and forth rapidly, as if she is looking for something. Her shoulders are tense and her fingers are curled into fists.
"She's searching the future," says Edward, I imagine in response to my expression.
"And?" I ask, needing to know what she sees.
"Alice can't see what Aro is thinking, only what he and the rest of the Volturi decide to do. He doesn't seem to be too preoccupied with the situation, but if I know him at all, his curiosity will surely cause him to act. He keeps changing his mind. One moment he wants to visit us himself and the next moment he has decided to invite us to his castle," answers Edward.
"Why, though? He didn't hear anything," says Emmett defiantly.
Carlisle answers this time. "Just the fact that Rosalie called him lets him know that something is happening. In general, we have avoided contact with the Volturi as much as possible. This is a fact that irks him to no end, I am sure, as he would love no more than to control the gifted vampires we have in our ranks. He obviously knows that we have come across an immortal being that is threatening in some way, so he will no doubt want to know more."
"So what do we do?" Emmett asks.
"There's nothing we can do, yet. We just have to wait until Aro makes his decision," I say to the general disappointment of the room. I can tell they want action.
"One way or another, I am going to have to meet Aro," I say with nonchalance that contrasts the nerves bubbling up inside my body. "Worrying about it now isn't going to change anything, so we all just need to relax. Alice, if it's not too much trouble I would appreciate it if you could watch Aro for me. In the meantime, Rosalie and I need to talk."
Emmett immediately growls in response to my words and sinks to a crouch in front of Rosalie. I sigh internally. Sometimes my life would be much easier if it weren't for the strange bond between mates.
"Look, Emmett, I am going to talk to Rosalie. Alone. You're just going to have to trust me when I say that if I wanted her dead she would be a pile of ashes right now," I say.
I start to say more but Rosalie cuts me off. She puts her hand on Emmett's shoulder. "Em, stand up," she says, and I am shocked at the kindness in her tone. "I need to talk to Bella. If she decides to kill me I honestly wouldn't blame her, but I don't think she will."
Emmett looks nervous, but he stands and steps to the side anyway. Rose walks past him and out the door. I move to follow her but Edward grabs my arm. He doesn't have to say anything to tell me how he feels. I feel his reluctance to be apart as if it were my own. It probably is. "Give us thirty minutes," I whisper, "and then you can come and get me."
He breathes deeply and nods. I squeeze his hand tightly and then walk past the rest of the Cullens and out the door.
Rosalie is already outside, leaning against the massive trunk of an evergreen tree. When I reach her we simultaneously begin to run. We don't say anything, and for once the silence isn't comforting to me. It is weighted down too much with unsaid words to be peaceful.
As we move farther away from the house, it gets harder and harder to keep the shield up around Edward. My mind feels stretched and I know the protection around him is weak, but I can't make my self pull it away from him. We're probably about five miles from the house, so no one will be able to hear us. Edward may be able to read Rosalie's mind, but I don't care about that. I'll tell him what we talk about anyway.
I slow to a stop and perch myself on a fallen log. Rosalie sits next to me, but far enough away that her discomfort is obvious. This situation is almost too similar to my earlier conversation with Edward. My mind drifts for a moment as I recall how safe I felt in his arms. I shake my head and focus on the vampire in front of me.
I know that she wants me to open the conversation, but I don't say anything. Partly because I want to see what she has to say, and partly because I'm afraid if I open my mouth I'll start yelling at her. I refuse to loose my temper, so I keep my lips pressed tightly together. The Cullens are marvelously impatient for vampires, so I'm betting that I won't have to wait long for her to speak.
She doesn't disappoint. "I'm sorry, for what it's worth, which I imagine is nothing, but I'm sorry nonetheless. You just have to understand how hard it is for me to trust people," she begins.
I don't say anything, still. I know that she's sorry; why else would we be sitting here? Sorry doesn't erase her actions. We sit in silence for a few more beats. She sighs after a moment and seems to prepare herself. I'm in the middle of wondering what for when she begins to tell me her story.
At first, I dislike her even more. The whole first half of her story is focused solely on her perfect human life was. How she was the object of every man's lust and the center of every girl's jealousy. How she had the perfect fiancé and everything she wanted just seemed to fall right into her lap. How her parents adored her and her father doted on her. I really start to regret not burning her up when I had the excuse. I almost slap her in the face a little, but I decide not to.
As it turns out, I'm glad I didn't. She was raped. By her supposedly perfect fiancé and his group of loser friends. They left her for dead in the street, and that is exactly where Carlisle found her- broken and bloody and wishing for death to take her away.
My arms envelope her automatically and she sobs into my shoulder for a moment. I understand now why she made her life seem so perfect. In reality, it probably wasn't as great as she made it sound. But I know that she has thought about these events more than she cares to admit. More than anyone else would guess. I know that it's easier for her to think her life was so perfect because that makes it easier for her to be angry about what happened. It makes it easier for her to justify killing her fiancé and his friends and probably even to hate Carlisle for what he changed her into.
I don't say any of these things to her, but I think she can tell from the look in my eyes that I understand. I know what I do have to say, but I'm hesitant to say it. I start slowly. "Thank you for telling me that. I know now why you have problems trusting even those who are closest to you. But I also know that what happened to you as a human has nothing to do with why you lash out at me. Jasper doesn't trust me either, but he didn't run to the Volturi. You did, and I want to know why."
Something flashes in her eyes. I think that it's anger or sadness or maybe a combination of both. Anyway, it's gone before I can decipher it. She stares at me for another moment before she buries her face in her hands. It's a shockingly vulnerable movement coming from Rosalie. She starts to speak and I have to strain my ears to hear her words.
"I was jealous, okay? That's it. I was jealous. You came here and you were perfect. We all knew you were a vampire, but you were so different. You seemed so impossibly human. You're eyes aren't gold or red. You eat salad and laugh at stupid jokes. You help people with homework and go to movies. The thing that I want most in the world is to be human again. I've been so angry about what I am that I never even tried to seem kind and open. I can't even tell you how jealous I was to see you becoming true friends with everyone at our school."
I mean to stop her there, but her words keep tumbling out.
"When I was changing I heard what Carlisle and Edward were saying. I know that Carlisle hoped that I would be Edward's mate. I also knew that Edward wasn't attracted to me at all. He was the only single male I had met that hadn't pinned over me. I hated him for it, but after a while it was okay because it didn't seem like he found anyone attractive. Then you walked into our lives and he was captivated the moment he laid eyes on you. Call me vain, but I was jealous of that too," she whispers into her palms.
"Okay," I say and she looks up at me.
"That's it?" she asks.
"Yeah, that's it. I do think you're vain, and I don't understand you, but it's okay. I know why you did what you did, so, okay."
She looks surprised, but I just shrug. That's just how I am. I have no room to judge anybody, so I don't.
"You have to understand though, if I were any other vampire, you would be dead now. Part of me still wants to burn you to ashes for what you did. I will not give you a second chance. I have never killed a vampire using my gift, but I will not hesitate to make you the first if you decide to cross me again. It's your choice, Rosalie. You can keep up your ice queen act and see how long it takes before I snap, or you can get your head out of your ass and realize that the only reason I'm here is because I want to be part of your family."
She nods slowly at me and I can tell from the absence of her scowl that my words have sunk in.
"Truce?" I ask and I hold out my pinkie. She laughs but twines her pinkie with mine.
"I haven't made a pinkie promise since the fourth grade," she says.
"Ah, well in case you've forgotten the rules, let me remind you. You can't ever ever ever break a pinkie promise. No matter what. Pinkie promises are the law."
She nods solemnly, but her eyes are twinkling.
I recognize that Edward is running towards us because the stretching in my mind seems to loosen. "Looks like our time is up," I say. Sure enough, Edward speeds into view less than a second later. Rosalie looks up in surprise and then turns back to me. She smiles and in the back of my mind I notice how much prettier she is when she isn't scowling. She hugs me quickly and then walks into the trees.
It's quite a relief to have Edward close to me again. My brain is rejoicing and I can't stop my arms from flinging themselves around his neck. After a second he pulls me flush against his body. I feel more than hear a rumble in his chest and I tilt my head up to meet his eyes.
It's like looking into the sun. I am practically blinded by the intensity of his gaze. After a moment he shifts his gaze down to my lips. Even with this distance between us, my lips feel like they're on fire. I suck in a shaky breath. As if pulled by a magnet, our heads move closer and we meet in the middle.
His lips are as smooth as the softest silk and as electrifying as a bolt of lightning. They barely brush mine, but it's almost too much for me to handle. With my shield around him, every feeling I have is magnified by thousands. A raging wildfire surges through every minuscule vein in my body. My blood is throbbing as if I still had a pulse. If my heart was still beating it would burst out of my chest. The fire is stronger than even the flames of a Bunsen burner and only infinitesimally easier to control.
Then he pulls my bottom lip in between his own and I loose it. Fire explodes through my skin and into the sky. It surrounds our bodies like a halo, never passing through the shield that connects us.
Edward gasps and his lips break away from my own. Without his lips on mine I regain control. I pull all the fire back into my body and gaze sheepishly as Edward.
He whispers something, but I don't care what it is because his lips are on mine again. I'm prepared this time, so I don't loose control. The fire stays inside me, and urges me to press my self closer to him, to taste more of him, to move my hands along the muscles of his back.
He makes a sound deep in his throat and lifts me off the ground. I wrap my legs around his waist. One of his hands moves up my back and tangles in my hair. His mouth is frantic but somehow I echo each of his movements perfectly. I'm guided completely by the uncontrolled fire within me and somehow it knows exactly what to do.
It could have been seconds or hours or days that pass as we stand kissing in the woods. Time has no meaning to me when all I can concentrate on is the glorious feeling of his lips against mine and his hands pulling me closer.
Eventually though, the kisses slow down and become more tender. Twice he sweeps his lips across mine so lightly that I can barely feel it. Then he rests his forehead on mine and stares into my eyes. My breathing is heavy and ragged, but I'm not embarrassed because his exactly matches my own.
He reminds me with two words why we can't stay in theses woods kissing forever, much to my chagrin. "The Volturi," he whispers and the days events come rushing back into the forefront of my mind.
I nod, but I can't make myself let go of him. I yelp in surprise when he swings me around onto his back. He starts to run and I rest my head on his shoulder. I touch my lips to his neck savoring for the moment his glorious scent and his even better taste, knowing that this peace won't last long.
