I don't own VM or the characters. I make no money of this – I only lay claim to the plot.


A/N I won't apologize for the sporadic updating, 'cause it's pointless. I will however say in advance that I struggled with this chapter. Some parts flew by and others crept painfully slow through my mind to my fingers. Not my favorite chapter, and if you feel the same way and decides to tell me it Sucks…well… then it's too bad. Enjoy! Oh and btw am I the only one having trouble uploading new documents?


CHAPTER TEN

Veronica woke up before her alarm was set to go off and groaned quietly into her pillow. After a few moments of deciding whether or not she should stay in bed or get up for a new day, Veronica finally stretched and sat up.

She walked into the bathroom and as usual didn't glance at the mirror before she stepped into the shower. Ten minutes later Veronica was in the middle of toweling herself off when she was hit with a sudden wave of dizziness and had to sit down on the toilet seat. "Whoa," she muttered and blinked rapidly as several black spots dotted into her line of sight.

For the first time in almost a week Veronica acknowledged her body's attempt to get into contact with her and decided she'd better eat something for once. Having decided that Veronica worked through her dizziness and got dressed as fast as possible. Then she began brushing her teeth. Inwardly Veronica was busy trying to count up just how much – or in my case, she thought realistically, how little, she'd been eating this week.

The amount was tiny at best and Veronica mumbled to herself in a scolding tone of voice, "Today's the day I'm gonna eat a full breakfast – or else things are gonna end badly!"

Finished with her pep-talk to herself and for once feeling somewhat in a good mood, Veronica straightened up a bit and exited the bathroom – intent on some breakfast.

That plan was smashed into bits and pieces when she ran straight into Jake Kane's body on the way into the kitchen. Jake Kane's bare-chested body to boot!

"Holy crap," Veronica exclaimed in disgust and tumbled backwards into the nearest wall upon the impact. Instantly she bit the inside of her cheek to stop the pained moan that threatened to escape from her lips. In the next second Jake held out a hand and when she didn't give him hers to let him help her upright again, he sighed and grabbed her hand anyway. "There you go Ronnie," he said with a wide smile.

I'm gonna go to jail for murder, Veronica thought hatefully, I can just see the look on Duncan's face if I kill his old man. Well, Veronica comforted herself as she simply walked into the kitchen without acknowledging the billionaire; at least Lily will send me cakes filled with files, just to spite him. The thought of Lily distracted Veronica briefly. She'd been a lot harder to get in touch with than normally and Veronica momentarily considered whether or not she should try and demand some explanations later at school.

"That wasn't very nice, honey," Veronica started in surprise and looked up from the counter, which she'd been looking at for a long minute. Lianne looks almost human today, Veronica thought and then asked calmly as she walked over to the refrigerator and grabbed a cup of yoghurt, "What are you talking about now?"

Lianne's sigh was loud and to Veronica's mild surprise, she actually seemed to want to get into a confrontation for a change. "Jake is being very courteous to you, Veronica and I think you should apologize for keeping up this childish behavior towards him."

Slam!

Veronica closed the refrigerator door with a bang and turned around to face her mother. All her previous thoughts about finally trying to eat slipped right out of her mind in her growing rage. "Are you really that stupid? Has the alcohol blown what little mind you had left right out of your skull?"

Lianne flinched at the harsh tone in her daughter's voice, but before she – or Veronica – could continue on with the discussion, Jake showed up behind Lianne and said with a stern look on his face, "Look here Veronica, you aren't allowed to speak to your mother like that, show her some respect. Apologize right now."

In that moment Veronica's rage blew up and a part of her feared for one small second that she might actually come through with her earlier desire and kill the man as she took a deep breath before she screamed, "you're not my father Jakey! Stop talking to me! You've ruined my fucking life enough already. And you!" Veronica's ice cold blue eyes turned back to her stunned mother, "you think I'll ever l respect you? A whore sleeping with a married man – a married man, whose family is falling apart because he thinks that whatever it is you've got between your thighs, is worth boinking!"

In the next second Veronica's rant was stopped and she felt her head turn sideways. The burn on her cheek from her mother's sudden slap didn't faze her in the slightest and Veronica smirked coolly, "When I turn eighteen, I promise I'll take you both down. Go to hell."

Veronica turned and walked out of the kitchen, ignoring her mother's plea and frantic apologies. I just need to go to someone, who doesn't ruin my life or the very least, my mood.

--

Thirty minutes later Veronica reached her goal. The Kane mansion. A small barely acknowledged part of Veronica had wanted nothing more than seek out Logan, but she knew that he'd probably be too caught up in this week's flavor. But then again, a more logical part of Veronica pointed out; he's been dating less frequently lately, so maybe…? Well, I wouldn't know, her mind added gloomily all of the sudden. Since their night together at the beach Logan hadn't been around as much as he usually was.

A beam of light from the sun hit the huge window, which Veronica knew to be Duncan's and her thoughts turned a bit sourer. And he's not the only one. Lily's been pulling away too. She's arriving later and later to pick me up for school and speaking of which, she was supposed to pick me up ten minutes ago back home…

Before Veronica had time to let her mind wander down that path, she saw the front door open and Lily came out and immediately all thoughts of Logan and Lily's evasiveness evaporated from her mind. For the first time in days Veronica looked at Lily and saw her without the usual cheery façade that she usually wore. Something has happened!

"Veronica? What are you doing here? I was supposed to pick you up in…" Lily said in greeting and checked her watch and Veronica saw her eyes widen as the other blonde realized that at this time of day she'd usually already be parked outside Veronica's house. "Err," Lily continued, "about ten minutes ago."

Veronica rolled her eyes and waited for Lily to reach her in the driveway before she asked bluntly, "what's wrong?" Lily's face turned carefully blank and she quickened her pace over to her car as she muttered, "Everything's just fine Veronica. What's up with you today; I know I'm running a bit late, but that's no reason for you to walk over here "behind enemy lines," Lily made air quotes when she said the last three words.

Veronica recognized a diversion when she saw one and decided to stop pestering her friend. I'm gonna get her to talk eventually, Veronica promised herself and got into the car while she answered truthfully, "Actually I just needed to get away from home today. I had a blowout with mommy dearest and your dad was there," Lily snorted and muttered, "off course – where else," before Veronica continued, "so to make this unbelievable boring story short, I yelled, Jake tried to parent, I yelled again, she hit me and here I am."

Lily's sigh was loud and Veronica's eyebrows nearly disappeared in her hairline when she heard the Kane heir's next words, "Maybe we should just leave them be for now. Maybe he loves her, ever think of that?"

Veronica crossed her arms and said, "And their - oh so wonderful - love makes it okay for them to cheat on their spouses and ruin everybody's lives?" Lily shifted gears and said in a quiet tone of voice, "Off course not. I just think we should let Lianne and Jake do their thing and concentrate on our own lives for once."

Veronica blinked in disbelief. Did I wake up in the twilight zone? She thought and felt her temper rising for the second time today. "I thought you hated their hypocrisy too Lils? And now you're all for it. What's going on with you these days?"

Lily glanced in her direction and to her surprise Veronica spotted a mixture of shame and anger in the other girl's face. "So what if I am?" Lily finally snapped. "I think you're being childish about this. My dad and my mom aren't exactly cozy and if he gets his jollies off hanging around Lianne, who am I to protest?"

"His child!" Veronica yelled and then she bit her lip in hurt shock when Lily sneered in an unusually hard tone, "Well, if your mom would just leave my dad alone – we wouldn't be having this discussion, would we?" Veronica held her breath in the following silence – waiting for an apology, because Lily would never betray her like this. Just last week, she promised never to leave me…

The apology didn't come and eventually Veronica closed her eyes for one long moment. Now I'm truly alone. Logan is her ex, he's bound to go with her and then I'll be all alone. It'll kill me. As though the thought reminded her body of its current predicament, pain suddenly boiled up inside Veronica's stomach and she grasped her belly and gasped – her eyes still shut closed.

"Ronnie?" Lily's voice was soft again, but Veronica didn't care. For the first time she felt suffocated in a car, without it being the actual cause of her discomfort. "Let me out," Veronica muttered when she felt more in control of her pain again. "We're almost at the school," Lily said, but then Veronica raised her chin and opened her eyes – forcing all her emotion away from them - and repeated, "Let me out of this damned car Lily."

A moment later the car stopped and before Lily had a chance to say another word; Veronica jumped out of the vehicle and started walking the last mile to the school. Internally Veronica was extremely confused and when Lily finally restarted her car and drove off alone, Veronica bent over and moaned out her sorrow. "Why does everybody leave me?"

Five minutes later Veronica got to her feet again and wiped her eyes, banishing the burning tears she couldn't quite help shed and continued walking looking like a walking dead.

--

Veronica finally managed to get to school halfway through the first class and instead of subjecting herself to the whole knocking on the door in the middle of class and inevitable suffer a few stupid remarks thing, Veronica sat down in the empty quad and placed her pounding head on the cool table.

"Got a minute?"

The sudden interruption from her growing pain and self pity caused Veronica's head to snap up and she forced a fake smile on her face when her eyes fell on Weevil. "I always got time for you Navarro. What's up?"

Weevil's dark eyes scanned the unmistakable traces of her tears, but fortunately he didn't remark on it as he casually sat down in front of her and said, "Well, it's like this. My grandma works at your boy Echolls house and he's accused her of stealing his credit card – or one of them anyhow. He hasn't taken it any further – according to her, he just blew up in her face yesterday, and told her to repay every dime she's stolen. Thing is," Weevil added with a quick look around, "I'm damn sure she wouldn't do that and I know my boy Chardo's been sneaking off with that Caitlin chick, who – coincidentally is a frequent guest in your white boy's bed chambers."

Veronica rolled her eyes, relieved that her headache and stomach cramp seemed to be fading in the light of this new challenge. "So, I'm just supposed to… what? Ask Logan politely not to point fingers at elderly maids and force him to kiss and make up, while you go out and kick that other PCH'ers behind?"

Weevil's serious face turned into a wicked smile and he nodded. "Basically yeah. I'm gonna take the blame if Echolls decides to press charges 'cause I'm underage, but until then I really want to resolve this – without my grandmother losing her job – she kindda needs the money, ya know."

Veronica nodded and stood up when the bell rang out in the next moment. Another sudden surge of dizziness made her stumble hesitantly on her feet and she felt Weevil grasp her arm for a second. "Whoa tiny," he exclaimed with worry in his eyes, "You all right? You look sort of green all of the sudden." Veronica nodded, shook of both the hand and the concern when she spotted Lily and Logan exiting the doors. "I'm fine and dandy, good sir. I'm just gonna go talk to Logan now – I'll let you know the dealio later on, okay?"

Weevil nodded and Veronica took off. She walked right over to Logan and used her previous anger and sadness to ignore the pale blonde by his side. "I need a word Logan," she said and added without looking at Lily, "Alone."

Logan blinked slowly and if she hadn't known any better Veronica could have sworn he was drunk – or suffering from a major hangover, but she did know better and knew that Logan didn't show up drunk. At least not when he knows I'm in school too seeing as I hate drunken people. "Sure, but err…" Logan glanced at Lily and then back at Veronica with an apologetic look in his eyes, "I sort of promised Lils to go talk with this Mac girl before the next class."

Veronica nodded and ignored the quick stab of hurt in her heart when she heard that her two best friends had made plans without her and said casually, "Okay, let's meet up after school and then you can drive me home too." Out of the corner of her eye, Veronica noticed the similar expression of hurt and rejection on Lily's face, but she told herself that she didn't care.

A moment later the bell rang and Veronica all but ran to the next class – eager to forget her troubles and dive into some good old unsolvable algebra.

--

When the last class of the day ended Veronica walked mutely out to the parking lot and pretended she didn't see Lily standing by her car with a serious look on her face. She let me down, so stop feeling guilty, Veronica told herself and ignored that logical voice within her, which said, well, maybe you should stop being so self righteous…

A minute later Veronica reached Logan's usual parking spot. To her surprise – and annoyance – she quickly realized the car wasn't there. He did not just stand me up, Veronica thought and felt her temper rise once again. He promised me… Somehow Logan's broken promise hurt more than any others in comparison.

"Veronica?" Lily's voice sounded across the parking lot and Veronica sighed and turned her head in Lily's direction. "What?" she asked coolly and Lily nodded towards the empty spot and then pointed at her own vehicle, "He probably just forgot – he seemed a bit out of it today…Let me take you home."

The more childish part of Veronica wanted nothing more than scream and throw a major tantrum using the words, traitor, liar and not a chance in hell, but the realistic part of her won out and she said tiredly, "Fine. But take me to his house, 'cause I need to talk to him – about a case," Veronica added before Lily got a chance to ask.

A few moments later the duo was on their way. Veronica looked out the window to avoid conversation and Lily seemed content enough just to keep quiet for once.

It didn't take long to reach the Echolls mansion and when they pulled into the massive driveway Veronica noticed that neither of Logan's parent's cars were present and thought, At least I can scold him without Aaron finding out and delivering his own punishment for leaving the damsel in distress at school. Veronica may be upset about Logan's forgetfulness – more so than she actually had expected – but she wouldn't want to get him into trouble with the famous father with the big temper.

"I'll take it from here," Veronica said as she stepped out of the car and noticed that Lily was about to follow her. Lily's eyes turned sad and she said with a pleading note in her voice, "Come on Ronnie, don't do this." Veronica crossed her arms and gritted her teeth for one long second as the always present stomach ache intensified for a moment. When the ache dulled for a second Veronica finally responded tiredly, "Well, you chose your side, remember?" Lily sighed and restarted the car, but she just sat immobile for a long while – watching Veronica with an intense look in her eyes. Eventually she said almost too quietly for Veronica's ears, "I chose your side Veronica. You'll know eventually."

A burst of self pity made Veronica snap at the other blonde. "The only thing I know is that you suddenly abandoned me for some stupid thing between our cheating parents. Don't worry Lily, I'll stay away from you from now and take the bus or whatever. At least Celeste will be pleased with you again." With that parting sentence Veronica turned quickly and walked towards Logan's front door. She heard Lily mutter angrily, "I'm disappointed in you. You of all people should know there's usually more than one side going on…"

Veronica acted as though she hadn't heard Lily's words and entered the house. It was eerily quiet and Veronica felt a sudden rush of goosebumps erupt on her arms.

"Hjelloooo," she called out softly, but no one answered. A few seconds later Veronica squared her shoulders and began walking towards Logan's bedroom. To her mild annoyance he wasn't there. He has to be here somewhere; Veronica thought and sat down on his rumbled bed. Logan always locks the doors from the crazy fan girls whenever the house is empty.

Veronica's vision blurred for a moment and she leaned backwards and snuggled into Logan's bed as she suffered yet another dizzy spell. All right, she thought to her aching stomach region and placed her hands on said spot, as soon as I've talked to Logan, I'll stop somewhere and eat the entire menu to please you… It took a few minutes, but eventually the pain subsided and Veronica sighed in relief. Then she took a deep breath and inhaled that special scent, which was Logan's.

A small part of her suddenly longed unexplainably after a hug from him and before she realized what she was doing; Veronica had grabbed his pillow and buried her head into it. Then she froze and looked up from the soft pillow. "What am I doing?" Veronica muttered – a bit embarrassed - and quickly walked out of the bedroom, before her traitorous body turned on her again.

Veronica renewed her efforts in locating her friend and as she wandered around the huge mansion and glanced briefly into some of the numerous rooms, she thought about her day so far. The argument with her mother and Jake had been long overdue, but the weird argument with Lily had completely thrown her and a small part of Veronica knew that was the main reason she was so focused on talking to Logan. Only a small portion of her mind was intent on helping out Weevil. Killing two birds with one stone never hurt anybody, Veronica thought as she walked through the large glass doors, which lead out to the pool area. "Well," she amended with a small smile as she made her way towards the pool house, "only the birds."

As she neared the pool house Veronica could hear faint music and shook her head. He's probably been working out and is now wiped out on the bed in there, she thought. Then she hesitated just before she was about to slide open the door. What if he's in there with some chick and I'm gonna interrupt a major moment? Veronica shuddered at the thought and her former annoyance immediately spiked when an image of a half naked Logan with a gorgeous woman entered her mind. Then he's just gonna have to reschedule that get together, she thought vindictively and finally opened the door to enter.

A second later Veronica's entire body froze in shock and disbelief. Yes Logan was having a moment, but it damn sure wasn't with a girl. Not unless she'd turned into a couple of thin lines of white powder.

Veronica watched in complete undiscovered silence as her friend finished his lane and sat up with closed eyes and a contented smile. Something broke inside of her seeing that faked happiness on his face and for the first time Veronica somehow understood that the feelings she had harbored for Logan was anything but platonic. She loved him with all her being. And I'll be damned if I'm gonna let another loved one go because of an addiction. Veronica thought dazedly and took a deep preparing breath - in the back of her mind she noticed that the entire pool house smelled vaguely familiar - a certain flowery scent, but she barely registered the observation in her rage.

"What the hell do you think you're doing to yourself Logan?" The words escaped her lips before she had had time to think about what to say to him. Logan's eyes instantly snapped open in surprise and his eyes widened almost comically at the sight of her.

"Veronica," he began, but she interrupted him with a hiss. "Are you stupid? Why are you doing this to yourself? I thought you had more brainpower than that!" Veronica yelled out the last part as her mind dove into the now familiar pool of anger inside her.

To her surprise Logan didn't jump to his own defense like she'd expected. No, he leaned back in his chair with a smirk on his face. If Veronica didn't look too long into his eyes, she'd never know he was high. "Look who's preaching for the choir." Logan drawled and placed his hands behind his head in a relaxed pose. Veronica swallowed back her angry retort and he continued mockingly, "Saint Veronica should sweep before her own door first."

Veronica crossed her arms and blinked back the burning in her eyes – determined not to cry. "This is not about me Logan Echolls! You're ruining yourself with this crap-". "Shut up Ronnie," Logan jumped to his feet with a wild look in his eyes. "Don't act so holy all the time! You're doing the same thing." Veronica gasped and took a step forward, "I'm not doing drugs." She stated, "I'm not that stupid!"

Logan's smirk returned as he matched her pose and crossed his muscular arms. "Oh really – then why aren't you eating sugarpuss? You're a shadow of yourself and if that's not killing yourself, I don't know what is!"

Veronica shook her head. I can't believe Lily told him; she thought and muttered something along those lines out loud. "Lily didn't need to tell me," Logan growled out and Veronica looked up – startled when she realized he'd walked up to her and was very close to her. "Despite your popular opinion right now, I'm not without brains." "No," Veronica whispered as the anger ebbed out of her and was replaced with much needed numbness – too many things had happened today, "You just kill it off with drugs."

Logan blinked slowly and for one brief moment his eyes glanced down to her lips and Veronica could have sworn he looked as though he wanted to kiss her for a second, but then Logan straightened up and towered over her. "Let's just agree to disagree on this one, 'kay Ronniekins." Veronica's numbness grew at his cold tone of voice. "Fine," she muttered and took another step backwards. "I won't bother you again. I just need to ask you something completely different – that is, if your drugged up mind can concentrate long enough."

Logan's smirk turned dangerous and Veronica shivered when his resemblance to Aaron Echolls increased. "Anything for you skinny gal."

Veronica sighed and told him about Weevil's request. Just as she finished, Logan burst into a crazed laugh, which made the hairs in the back of Veronica's mind stand up. "So that's who she's been banging besides me," he said and Veronica's heard hurt a bit more when she realized he was talking about Caitlin Ford. Be professional, she thought – trying with all her might to stop her heart from breaking. I know it's a stupid time to realize you're in love with Logan and that the thought of him with another girl hurts, but suck it up Mars. "Yeah," Veronica said after Logan finished another round of inappropriate laughter, "so are you gonna let Weevil's grandmother keep her job? Or are you gonna press charges and be a complete asshole?"

Logan's smile vanished and he impaled her with his stare. Veronica fidgeted uncomfortably and waited for his response. "I might be an asshole," he slowly began, "but I'm not heartless. Mrs. Navarro shouldn't suffer 'cause of her grandchildren's antics. You're disappointing me Veronica," he added after a short pause.

Veronica went rigid. First Lily and now him – what is this bizarre world I've woken up to? "Well," she said defensively when the surprise dimmed, "I guess I'm not the only one being disappointed today."

Logan chuckled and Veronica could see how the drug was kicking in to the fullest as his balance weakened and he all but fell down on his abandoned chair. "Go away Veronica," he said, "I don't need condescending remarks from a girl, who's too far gone in her own misery to see things clearly. You know where the door is, right?"

"You really are an asshole," Veronica whispered and quickly turned and walked out of the pool house. As she walked along the pool Veronica's mind was screaming at her to go back and apologize for not telling Logan about – among other things - her problems with food. Another part of her mind was still stuck on the whole drug thing and it was raging at him. A third part was telling her to locate Lily and make things right between them so they could help Logan together. "I-I can't do this anymore," Veronica whispered into the empty space.

Suddenly Veronica stopped and bent forward. The stomach pains were back with a vengeance and she moaned and clutched her belly as hard as she could. It took a few minutes before she could recover enough to even stand upright. Then – as she was trying to do just that – the dizziness swept over her, but this time it was worse than ever. Little black spots darkened her vision and Veronica stumbled heavily – almost unable to move as the pain came back in the next moment and added its two cents to the mix along with a heavy dose of nausea.

Veronica tumbled forwards and far away she heard a splash and it took her a long moment to realize that she'd fallen into the pool. The pain didn't stop and Veronica barely felt the air in her lungs burn after more air as she struggled through the fierce agony. Weakly she tried to move enough to break the surface, but it was without success. Veronica opened her eyes in the water and saw a thin line of red in front of her. Where am I bleeding from? She managed to think as her vision turned black despite her open eyes.

A few seconds later Veronica truly felt numb and for the first time in her life, she stopped fighting the inevitable. A more realistic part of her knew that she wasn't fighting because she was weary to the bone. And my two best friends think I'm an annoyance, Veronica thought tiredly and finally just let go and everything turned black. They won't care…

--

Suddenly Veronica was jerked awake again. Far away she heard someone unknown say, "She's back." She felt pain – more intensely than she'd ever felt it before and she groaned out her displeasure. "Oh God, Ronnie, can you hear me?" that voice was familiar – the pleading tone however was not and Veronica struggled to place it – to calm it down. "Sir," another unfamiliar voice said before she could solve her voice mystery, "- Kid, listen to me! We need to take her to the hospital now and get her checked thoroughly for everything. She was out for a while and we need to make sure she's okay."

I'm okay, Veronica wanted to say when the familiar voice sobbed and she felt a kiss being placed on her forehead. "I'm so sorry Veronica; please don't leave me. I love you…" Veronica yearned to tell the person besides her that she was sorry too, she just couldn't concentrate enough to do so. And then a moment later she felt the world start go black again. In the distance Veronica heard the unfamiliar voices again, "We gotta move – her BP's dropping fast! Make sure the ER knows we're coming!"

TBC...


A/N Okay if you're done glaring daggers at yours truly, let me just say that I am the writer and if you kill me, you'll never know how this ends. Also now I'm entering the more LoVe anchored part of my story – this is (probably) the last bad thing to happen to V. until my ending (cue ominous music). And now after Lily and Logan have had their say, the story is sort of gonna be a bit (just a bit) lighter. Well…that's my plan anyhow. Please review, I need feedback ;)

Ditte Mai