Chapter 11
They drove like wild fire back to the apartment while Damon hyperventilated and tried to get them to think of a way to stop Stefan from dying. Their knowledge only extended so far however and Damon ended up working himself up into a frenzy that Michael had to shake him out of as they exited the car.
"Damon! You will make this much worse if you don't calm down. There's nothing to be done!" Michael shouted, shaking Damon by the shoulders as Damon growled and bore his fangs hissing in anger.
"Damon!" Anne shouted and he looked to her and tried to calm down. "Stefan needs you. You will be of no comfort if you frighten him like this." She reasoned and Damon calmed, immediately tearing up as he tried to breathe. "Now calm yourself. Stefan may already be in pain and you should do all you can to comfort him till the end." Damon squeezed his eyes closed and let out a sob of pain and disbelief.
"He may only have a day or so." Michael said more gently, releasing Damon. "Make use of that time." Damon wiped his eyes and deflated as they took an arm each and walked with him up into the hallway of their building. Damon straightened up and bit his lip, readying himself as he opened their door and stepped inside. Anne and Michael followed closely behind as he walked into their lounge.
"Stefan?" He called tentatively, fear evident in his voice and he scanned the room. They all turned to hear the unmistakeable sounds of vomiting coming from down the hall. Damon blurred to the bathroom. Stefan was lying on the floor, gasping and holding his stomach.
"Stefan!" Damon reached for him as Stefan looked up in pain.
"I don't feel…" Stefan began before groaning and curling into himself as his stomach cramped. Damon lifted him into his arms and carried him through to their bed as Anne and Michael followed, holding each other. He lay Stefan on the bed and stroked his hair away from his face, whispering words of comfort as Stefan groaned. Damon looked back at Anne and Michael distraught and they both gulped.
"Is this it?" He asked.
"It'll get worse. I'm so sorry." Anne said.
"No. I won't let this happen." Damon said and bit into his wrist, pushing it against Stefan's mouth.
"No!" Michael shouted and grabbed him, pulling him from Stefan as Stefan took a gulp. Damon growled and hissed at him.
"It'll hurt more Damon. Your blood will hurt him now!" Anne cried and Damon froze in contemplation and turned back to look at how Stefan was breathing. Stefan's eyes were wide and he was gasping.
"Stefan?" He called in worry and Stefan's face creased as he screamed and curled into himself again. Damon fought to get away from Michael and Michael released him. He rushed to Stefan and tried to hold him as Stefan began to weep and contort violently.
"Stefan I'm sorry!" Damon began to sob, feeling unable to comfort him as the pain wracked Stefan's body.
"Damon!" Stefan begged, clutching Damon's t-shirt and holding him to his chest as he searched Damon's eyes for relief. Damon held him, climbing on to the bed and wrapping his body around him as Stefan clung to him as though he was a life vest. Anne and Michael turned and left the room to give them privacy as Damon rocked Stefan, whispering words of comfort but there was no comfort to be found for Stefan. He screamed for the next few hours, exhausting himself and making Damon rip his hair out and smash furniture in anger, grief and reluctance to believe that this was happening. Anne and Michael took turns comforting Stefan as Damon spiralled.
"Why is this happening?!" Damon shouted in torment as Stefan screamed again, while Anne tried to sing to him gently and comfort him. Michael forcibly sat him down in the lounge and tried to help him understand.
"You're mated blood is gone. When you tried to feed him, his body tried to link with it and it couldn't. That's why he's in pain."
"If I have the chemical why can't we re-mate?"
"Because you're blood transforms together. Once someone's' blood has changed, it can't re-establish the connection."
"But my blood changed, why can't his?"
"Your blood was transfused and subjected to experiments. Valerie injected your blood and chemicals into herself. In effect, her blood tried to mask yours. It stopped your body being able to understand Stefan's blood anymore."
"Why did it change back?"
"To your body, there was no longer a bond. As you began to change back, your body had to expel all traces of the foreign mated blood to protect you. Stefan tried to feed you and you vomited it all." Michael explained calmly as Damon put his head in his hands, trying to absorb it all.
"You've seen this happen before?" Damon looked up at him feeling washed out and exhausted. Michael nodded.
"We had friends who were mated. Marcela and Erica."
"Marcela? Stefan knew Marcela! We have her journal." Damon spoke up rapidly and Michael raised his eyebrows in interest. "She wrote about how they had mated, but there's nothing else in there. I've read it cover to cover."
"Marcela was abducted as you were." He spoke slowly, with pain in his eyes as he recalled it. "They broke her bond too. She managed to escape however and got back to Erica." Damon sat forward in his chair intensely as he urged Michael to continue. Michael cleared his throat.
"They noticed something was wrong instantly. Erica couldn't smell her. They tried to feed from each other and couldn't. They were both ill. Erica grew increasingly ill and wracked with pain as Marcela watched. She didn't realise that her blood would hurt her and she kept trying to feed her." Damon gulped bile as he realised how much pain that must have caused her. Stefan sobbed loudly and Damon turned his head, his eyes filling with tears as Anne began to sing again.
"Marcela got better as Erica got worse until she desiccated – her body unable to feed at all. We tried everything we could think of to get her body to allow blood into her, but nothing worked and in the end Marcela staked her." Damon put his head in his hands and let out a moan of distress. "Afterwards, Marcela realised she could feed as normal again, but she didn't want to. We tried to help, tried to help her grieve and move on but she refused. She starved herself until she couldn't move and begged us to end her life so she could be with Erica." Damon's shoulders shook as he sobbed silently and Michael reached over and squeezed his arm warmly.
After three more hours, Stefan stopped screaming and although that made Damon feel more hopeful, Anne and Michael knew that it wasn't a good thing. Stefan didn't have long.
"The pain's stopping!" Damon smiled as he held Stefan in his arms and kissed his head. Stefan was drenched with sweat and his skin was a yellow colour now. His body was drying up inside. Still, Damon was blind to it all as he focussed on Stefan's silence.
"Damon…" Anne cooed, stroking his arm and sitting beside him. "Say what you feel to him. This is the time to say your goodbyes." She said gently.
"He's getting better!" Damon grunted, kissing Stefan's head again and cupping his cheek to look at his face. He took in Stefan's eyes and felt his stomach roll. Stefan's eyes were clouding. "Stefan?"
"I'm so tired." Stefan mumbled closing his eyes.
"No, Stefan you have to stay awake. You have to keep fighting." Damon instructed and Stefan looked up at him hopelessly.
"I love you." He whispered and Damon choked and kissed his lips softly.
"I, I…" He stuttered. "Stefan don't leave me." He begged realising that Anne was right. Stefan couldn't die, he just couldn't! Stefan was all he had - his brother, his companion and his mate. Without Stefan there would be nothing to live for, just the prospect of the rest of eternity alone without his family, his blood. Through the years of hating Stefan he at least knew that he wouldn't ever be really alone in the world. Family was family and he and Stefan had started this journey together. Anne rose to leave and Damon snapped back to attention on her quickly.
"Wait! If I was changed because I was fed someone else's' blood with the chemical, won't your blood work the same for him?" There had to be something left they could do. She shook her head and looked down at Stefan.
"He's too far gone."
"You mean we could have tried that?!" Damon gasped in disbelief and she took a step back uncomfortably. "Why didn't you say?" He growled now and Stefan moaned in pain, snapping Damon's focus back to him again.
"You don't understand Damon. Michael is my mate. If I was to feed him, it could affect my bond and I have no idea whether it would ultimately change anything for Stefan. I know for certain though that Michael would suffer pain and possible death and I'm sorry but I can't risk that." She said sadly and he looked to her in fear and anger. She shook her head again as he began to sob silently, cradling Stefan again.
"I can." Michael sounded from the doorway. They both looked to him in surprise. His expression was tight, his mouth a fine line. "Let's try it." He said. Anne shook her head in fear, walking over to him beseechingly but his expression remained firm.
"We can't lose any more of us. If there's a chance, we have to try." He said and she gulped. Damon watched them hold each other and kiss as he tried to calm her.
"You feed him. I can't bear to see you in pain." She suggested but he shook his head vehemently. If Michael was the one to break the bond it would mean that Anne could die. She would prefer that rather than the alternative.
"No. I won't have you go through this. Feed him and then feed me. Perhaps there's a chance you can stop anything happening to our bond if we are quick." He stroked her face as he spoke and she held his hand to her cheek. Damon watched silently as Anne turned to him. He held his breath and looked to her in desperation and she nodded.
"Thank you. Thank you…" He sobbed and let her come to Stefan's side, taking his place as he passed Stefan over to her embrace. Stefan was barely aware as she looked over to Michael one last time before she bit into her wrist and put it to Stefan's mouth. Stefan drank slowly and delicately as his eyes rolled back into his head. He was so weak. Damon and Michael both stood at the bottom of the bed watching intensely. Stefan's pull on her blood became a little stronger and so she brought her wrist away and stroked his face as he licked his lips groggily.
"Uhhh…" Michael groaned, holding his stomach as Damon supported him in fear. Anne looked to him as he gasped and groaned again, almost doubling over. She lay Stefan down and went to him in a blur as Damon stepped away to go to Stefan, scooping him into his arms protectively as he stroked his face and whispered his name to him. Michael groaned again and Damon looked over at them. He was feeding from Anne's neck but still seemed to be in pain. Anne held him and bit into his neck, trying desperately to re-establish their connection. Damon watched in interest as Michael seemed to calm and relax again against her. Stefan sucked in a deep breath and Damon looked down at him hopefully.
"Stefan?" He called and Stefan looked up at him. Stefan didn't seem to know where he was and didn't answer. Damon leaned down and bit into his neck as carefully as he could. He swallowed a mouthful as Stefan groaned in pain. Stefan's blood tasted a little different, it was beginning to change! He pulled up and smiled in relief for a moment before he realised how close Stefan was to the burning sensation of being completely drained and decaying. He lifted him and blurred to the kitchen, kicking the fridge open with his foot and holding Stefan to him with one arm and hip as he grabbed Stefan's pig blood. He blurred back to the bedroom, where Anne and Michael were now sitting on the floor and blood sharing still and lay Stefan down against the headboard. He removed the top and put the bottle to Stefan's mouth, pouring some inside and waiting. Stefan frowned and made an unhappy sound as the blood slid down his throat and Damon's heart stopped in fear he would wretch.
He continued to hold the bottle as Stefan's hands came up to his and he tipped more blood into his throat. Stefan closed his eyes and continued to swallow until the bottle was finished. Damon rested the bottle down and leaned down to cup Stefan's cheek as he reacclimatized.
"How is he?" Anne asked from beside him and he jumped in surprise.
"Stefan?" Damon whispered and Stefan opened his eyes and looked at him.
"What?" Stefan asked sounding a little drugged as he spoke and Damon smiled excitedly.
"How do you feel?" Anne asked and Stefan looked to her and began to remember what was happening. His eyes moved around as he took note of his body, how it felt, how the blood was settling in his stomach and he looked back to them both.
"Better." He said and Damon breathed in relief and grabbed him to him. Stefan turned to Anne. "What happened?" Michael stood up from the floor a little unsteadily and Anne went to his side to support him as Damon and he exchanged a look.
"I don't know how to thank you." Damon said sincerely and Michael nodded.
"Too many of us have perished. I couldn't stand by and watch anymore." Michael said and kissed Anne lovingly.
"What?" Stefan sat up a little straighter in confusion.
"But then, you are not like us anymore Damon." Anne pointed out and Damon tensed, realising how much Stefan was unaware of. He turned to Stefan sadly and Stefan looked up at him quizzically. "It's been a long day. We have a motel not far from here. We'll give you both some space and rest." She said and they slowly walked from the room, holding each other again.
Stefan pulled on Damon's arm and Damon sat down next to him. Stefan looked into his eyes in confusion and Damon smiled at him and kissed him softly.
"Everything's ok now. Don't worry." He soothed, stroking his hands through Stefan's hair as Stefan let his eyes fall closed in comfort.
"What happened?" Stefan whispered as he tried to stay awake.
"Just rest little blood machine. Sleep." Damon cooed, kissing Stefan's forehead and helping him lie down flat on his back again. Stefan grunted, wanting to stay awake and talk but his body was exhausted and he fell into a deep sleep as Damon lay beside him. Tomorrow they would deal with the aftermath of everything that had happened. Right now they needed to rest and feel safe again. As Stefan fell asleep, Damon curled around him, holding him and kissing his shoulder in relief. He couldn't believe how close he'd come to losing Stefan. So much had happened.
He closed his eyes, lulled by Stefan's familiar breathing and tried to block it all out, every time Valerie had fed him, touched him…All that time he had thought that all she was doing was trying to help him keep blood down, training his stomach, but she had been trying to mate with him. He shivered, remembering his willingness to allow her to do it. He hadn't known. He hadn't known. Stefan brought his arms around him as he shivered again and Damon leaned his head against Stefan's, breathing in. Everything was so different. He couldn't smell Stefan anymore – no more than a normal human or vampire would anyway. Stefan used to smell of Dutch roses to him. He leaned in and breathed again, searching for that scent and frowned when he realised it really was gone. Stefan sighed loudly next to him but remained asleep.
The bond was really gone. Damon leaned up and looked down at Stefan's face. He tilted his nose down and sniffed at Stefan's neck and throat. This used to be one of his favourite places so kiss, lick and bite. No scent other than Stefan's blood underneath the skin. He frowned again. The urge to lick Stefan was gone too. It seemed a weird thing to want to do now. Damon exhaled and rested his head back down again. He had wanted to know how much of his feelings were forced by the bond. He knew now, and had known as soon as Michael and Anne had told him Stefan would die, just how much he still loved Stefan despite the bond being gone. His feelings were exactly the same as they had been. He should draw some comfort from that but in truth, he hadn't realised just how much else would change. His senses were obviously dulled and he hadn't realised just how much he had enjoyed them till now.
When Stefan had lost it and ripped Leigh apart he had felt scared but elated by it. The sex they had afterwards had been explosive and unbelievable and it was partially due to the intensity of it. He remembered every stroke of Stefan's tongue as he had licked him from head to toe, making him pant and whimper in desire and pleasure. There was something about being licked like that that had made him feel protected, desired and safe. He couldn't put his finger on it now that the compulsion to lick was gone. All he remembered was the feeling of being owned and worshipped. That feeling wasn't something that would normally sit well with him either. He liked to be in control, but he had given himself completely to Stefan at that moment, even letting Stefan lick at his entrance as he hummed and melted. Normal sex wouldn't compare to that now.
He closed his eyes, trying not to think like that and hoped that in the morning things wouldn't seem too bleak. He had a lot of explaining to do to Stefan about Anne and Michael and he knew that he was bound to be in the dog house over it. He exhaled and snuggled into Stefan and let himself fall asleep.
