I know i took so long and im sry.
star once again helped me.( luvz her)
i know this is long but its worth the read.
i have a feeling im gonna gain and loose fans.
but i hope u guys will review! it makes my day! xoxoxo kisses
Summary:Manny finally got her life back together,friends with Craig even..but when a new girl comes will she
take her back to the life that she just recovered?Or even worse?Ashley comes back from London..and not sure of the relationship
rated:M for violence,drug use,breif sex,language,situations involving teens,prostituting,rape
Disclaimer:I do not own Degrassi;or any of the songs used in the story
warnings:in future chapters there may be a scene not meant for younger audience which i will change the ratings
a/n:even if i dont get that much reviews i will continue to update I really fell in love with the plot and
i think this teaches us a lesson to always choose the right friends and learn to say no
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Chap 11-
CRAIG POV
Shit, can't this guy drive any faster. I really need to see my Manny, I thought to myself as I sat in the back seat of a taxi. I was so impatient. I don't know if it was because I was anxious about seeing her or because of the crystal I did when the driver wasn't looking. Maybe a combo of both. Traffic seemed to be extra bad today. It was only like a 25 minute ride and its been 25 minutes and I still wasn't there. The driver kept looking back at me as if he was nervous or something. He turned once again to look at my nails tapping rapidly on the window.
"Oh sorry." I said leaning my chin on my arms that were now resting on the seat in front of me "Sorry about that I just can wait to see my girlfriend."
The man just kinda kept driving.
"I haven't seen her in a month. I really miss her. She misses me. We need each other." I said confidently.
I then sat back. I realized that I may have been talking to much. I tapped my foot on the floor waiting in anticipation until we finally got there.
"Thanks man." I said right before I got out giving him the cab fair. It was a beautiful day I couldn't wait to walk these streets with Manny.
"ROSES, 10 DOLLARS" some random guy said on the sidewalk in front of the hotel. Flowers, perfect, I thought to myself.
"10 dollars right?" I asked pulling out my wallet and handing him a 10.
"Yes sir, here ya go. I hope she likes him." the man smiled. I smiled back.
When I walked in I was at a loss for words. The Hilton was beautiful. I headed towards the elevators. It didn't take long to come down. When I stepped inside I began to feel a little nervous. I haven't seen Manny in a whole month, I thought. I took out a small bag with meth inside. I scooped a little up with my finger and snorted it. I quickly put it away. Deep inside my pocket. By the time I got to the 6th floor my confidence returned. I stepped out and proceeded down the hallway. I was so happy that I was finally going to see her I would have ran to her door if I didn't look to much like a dumb ass. I got to door 616. I hesitated before I knocked. I took a deep breath.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
MANNY POV
Oh my God, who is that? I thought as I turned over to look towards the door. I pulled the covers back and sat up.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
"Ummm o.k." I said slightly annoyed. I started walking to the door.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
"Oh my God." I said annoyed at this point. I swung the door open. I couldn't believe it.
"Oh my God Craig!" I screamed. I threw my arms around him and he picked me up and shut the door.
"Hey" he said sounding just as happy I was. He carried me to the bed and sat down.
"Hi." I said finally pulling away from him sitting on his lap. "How did you know where I was?"
"I called Emma."
He handed me roses.
"Thanks. These are beautiful."
"Well they are for a beautiful girl." He smiled and said sweetly.
God he looked so sexy. He had on a tight black shirt and a snug pair of jeans. His hair had that dirty unwashed look and he looked a lot slimmer. I kissed him, went straight for the tongue. He flipped me over so that he was on top. He looked at me and smiled, I smiled back. He kissed me once more and then sat up kind of. I raised up on my elbows.
"So rock star, what's been going on with you? How many girls have been trying to fuck you?" I said jokingly.
"None. And besides if they were it wouldn't matter."
"Sure. I bet." I said looking to the side.
"How's Marco and Jimmy?" I asked.
"They're fine. Pretty much the same." Craig said while nodding.
"I wanna go to one of your shows." I told him.
"Well we are on a break right now and I want to spend every moment with you." Craig said as he put my hair behind my ear. "I missed you more than you would ever know."
"No. I missed you more than you would ever know." I reassured him. He had no idea what it was like without him. Not at all. We kissed again but it was quick.
"What about you? How was you audition?" Craig asked me smiling.
"I blew it, completely." My expression changed a little.
"Is this what you wore?" Craig asked tugging at my skirt playfully. Shit I completely forgot I was still in the outfit that I wore to the party I immediately thought.
"Uh yea.". I didn't want to have to explain this outfit.
"And you didn't get the part." He said shocked "I'm surprised." I didn't say anything.
"Oh well. They were dumb to give the part to some one other than you." He smiled. He's so nice to me.
"Thanks."
He moved up closer on me so that he was closer to my face. The change in position made me lay all the way down. Craig started kissing my neck.
"Craig." I laughed. He kept going. He took his hand and started to rub my thigh. His hand was going higher.
"Craig." I said moving his hand.
"Ugh alright." He said lifting himself completely off me.
"Later." I smiled blowing a kiss up at him.
"Yea, later." He grabbed my hands and lifted me up, "C'mon, get dressed. There are so many places I wont to show you."
"Like where?" I said curiously as I stood up.
"You'll see." He responded.
I went in the bathroom and turned the shower on. I came back out to grab some things from my bag. Craig was stretched out on the bed watching t.v. with the remote laying on his stomach.
"Manny." Craig said lifting his head up to look at me. I was on my way back to the bathroom. I turned around right before I went inside.
"I love you." He said.
I so believe him.
"I love you to."
He smiled and continued watching t.v. I went in and undressed. It was a little steamy but I didn't mind because I liked the water hot. I stepped inside and started looking at the different shampoos. I saw the door open out the corner of my eye. It was Craig. He walked to the shower door and opened it and looked at me. I was actually a little shy. He was smiling.
"I reallllly missed you Manny." He said while staring at me from my head to my toes.
"You did?" I laughed.
He took off his shirt then stepped out of his pants and shoes. He stepped inside the shower. He came really close and pinned me playfully against the wall by my wrist.
"Your so silly." I said looking directly in his eyes. His eyes looked a bit different to me. Like they were lacking something. He started kissing me. I kissed back of course. He stopped suddenly and looked to the side. I turned to see what he was looking at. He had a serious look on his face.
"Manny, what…what happened to your arm?" he asked me as he brought my arm down so he could see it better. He was looking at my scars from where I had previously cut myself. Shit. What am I gonna tell him, I thought.
"Manny." He said.
"I-I uh-" I began.
"Did, did you this?" He asked
looking at me. I couldn't face him. I looked down. He held my chin up with his hand.
"Manny," He said looking at me then my scars. I was speechless not to mention embarrassed. He lifted up my arm and kissed my scars. He pulled me close to him and hugged me for like forever. He kissed the top of my head then pulled away. I didn't know what to do.
"It's gonna be o.k. I'm here now." He said. I believed him.
I was feeling slightly uncomfortable, but the feeling went away just as quickly as it came. Craig turned me around so that I wasn't facing him. He got the sponge off the shower shelf and started washing my back. I love the way Craig always takes care of me when we are together. We showered for about 15 minutes and I continued getting ready. Craig threw his clothes back on and just kind of shook his head. He always looked good with wet hair. I dried my hair straight and went to the pile of clothes on the floor and just stood there looking at it. I wanted something cute to wear since Craig was here. Everything I had just looked really simple.
"You always have taken forever to get ready." Craig said smiling but I could tell that he was tired of waiting.
"No I don't." I responded.
"O.k. You don't." Craig said pretending to be looking at a watch. I really did try to hurry. I got a tight pair of jeans and an extra small baby tee that had a martini glass on it. After slipping that on I was basically ready. I did some quick eye shadow and liner and was done.
"Let's go." I said standing in front of him.
"Finally" He playfully dragged. We headed downstairs. When we got outside I had a cigarette. We stood on the sidewalk for a sec.
"Well what did you wanna do?" I mumbled. My cigarette was resting on my mouth while I tried to light it. I did and took a puff.
"We have some time to kill. I wanted to maybe meet Jimmy then do some shit after that." Craig said looking around then turning my direction. He took my cigarette. I thought that he was going to throw it out but instead he took a puff and just handed it back to me as if he never scolded me about how bad smoking was for me. I was to shocked to say anything. Oh well smoking isn't bad.
"C'mon." He said grabbing my hand so we could get the taxi that pulled up in front of us. Craig let me in first then he followed behind me.
"Could you take us to Melrose please?" Craig said to the driver.
"Sure."
The driver took off. We were on our way.
"What's on Melrose?" I asked him.
"Well, I figured we could do a little shopping." Craig smiled looking at me.
"Really?" I squealed. He nodded.
I laid my head on his shoulder. He put his arm around me. My hotel wasn't that far from where we were going. We were there.
"Thanks." Craig said as he handed the cab driver the money. He got out first and I followed behind him. Every store looked amazing. Some I knew some I didn't. There wasn't a one that looked stupid.
"So where you wanna go first dear?" Craig laughed as we walked down the sidewalk holding hands.
"Uh…dear?" I said looking at him like where did that come from.
"Yea, dear. You don't like it?" He said smiling strangely.
"No" I paused, "muffin. It's cute in a um sarcastic kind of way." I smiled.
We walked down more. Craig is so silly. I wanted to get something that I knew he would like.
"Why don't we go in here?" I suggested.
"Victoria's Secret!" Craig's eyes grew from excitement. He playfully dragged me in there. There were a lot of cute things in there just as expected.
"So see anything you like?" I asked him smiling in his face.
"Definitely." Typical answer. We shared a small short giggle.
"Come here, look at this." Craig said while holding up a hanger. It was one of those black and pink angel shirts that split open at the bust, with matching panties. It was really cute actually.
"Oh I like that." I said taking it from him. We continued looking around. We got a couple other things, bought them and then left.
"Awww, honey thank you." I said as we were walking out. He had his arm around my shoulders and mine was around the back of his waste.
"No problem." He smiled, "Anything for you."
I smiled back. The shopping didn't stop there. We went to several other places. I got some more stuff and Craig got a few things for himself as well. Craig pulled out his cell phone 2 call Jimmy. I stepped to the side to look in some window. While Craig was talking he blew me kiss. I caught it in the air.
"You wanna meet Jimmy?" He asked as he slipped his phone back into his pocket.
"Yea. It would be nice to see him." I said as I walked over to him, "Will Marco be there?"
I missed Marco we were such good friends at one time. Craig was standing on the edge of the sidewalk trying to hail a cab.
"Uh no." Craig said carelessly. Almost like he wouldn't want Marco to be there.
"Where is he?"
"Who cares?" Craig said. I could tell he wanted to change the subject. He was able to get a cab and we went to meet Jimmy at some restaurant called Russo's. It had a chic vibe but also was kinda laid back. Jimmy was outside waiting for us. We went up to him.
"Jimmy…hi." I smiled hugging him, "You look great." he had let some facial hair grow. It looked nice.
"You look beautiful as always." He said as we pulled away from each other. I laughed. Craig and Jimmy did that handshake hug that guys do.
"I'm surprised you're not with a bunch of groupies" I joked.
"Yea. I wish." Jimmy responded. The 3 of us went inside. It was kind of dark but sexy. We were seated immediately.
"This place has really good food." Jimmy said as he looked at the menu.
"What's good?" I asked. He pointed at some stuff on the menu.
"What are you getting?" I asked Craig.
"I dunno. But I want something good, I'm starving."
We all continued to look at our menus.
"Um excuse me." Some random girl said from behind me. I guess she was cute. She had on a pretty cute out fit. Something I would where.
"You're the guys from D.S. right" She asked smiling really hard.
"Yea." Craig answered. Him and Jimmy both were smiling just as hard as she was. I was just sitting there watching this.
"I was at your last show. You guys rocked it."
"Thanks." Jimmy said looking at her then Craig.
"Craig and Jimmy right."
"Yea." Craig smiled at Jimmy, "That's right."
The girl put her hand on the table kind of like right in front of me.
"Wow I cant believe this. I cant believe I'm actually here in the same restaurant as you." She didn't sound stupid at all, but I was still was feeling ya know a little like Ugh Ewww towards her. It sucks being a girl. Always feeling threatened no matter what the situation is.
"Wow it's so weird to hear some one say that." Jimmy said looking at them both.
"Do you want to Maybe have a seat?" Craig asked her.
Ugh. What the fuck? Did Craig actually just ask her to sit down with us, I thought.
"Oh my God. Are you serious?" She asked in shock. Jimmy and Craig nodded. She then sat down. Jimmy had to get an extra chair from the table behind us. He put the chair right between him and Craig. The waiter finally came. He took my order first because I wasn't talking obviously. The 3 of them then ordered quickly and continued their conversations. Nothing changed when the food arrived. They barely even ate anything. I really couldn't believe this was happening. Like you hear and see this stuff on t.v. but you assume that its exaggerated because its for entertainment value but I was actually being ignored. It was as if I wasn't even there. I would say stuff and they wouldn't even pay attention to it. I mean I understand Craig wanting to be good to his fans and Jimmy trying to like maybe get her to come to his room after or something but like completely ignoring me. How rude. After I was done eating I was so ready to go.
"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." I said getting up from the table but no one cared. The bathroom was empty. As silly as it sounds I wanted to cry. That's how stupid I felt but I didn't. I messed with my hair then walked out to see them sitting cheek to cheek because they were all scrunched together to take a picture. I walked passed them and went outside to smoke a cigarette. When I was about half way done I could see them saying their goodbyes through the window. Craig and Jimmy started walking towards the exit.
"Manny, what's up?" Jimmy asked. I didn't answer.
"She was nice, eh." Craig said to me. I was not amused.
"Whatever." I said as I stepped on my cigarette that I had just thrown down. I'm assuming Jimmy sensed a cold vibe.
"Um I'm gonna go now." Jimmy said slowly, "Manny it was nice seeing you. I'll probably see you later." He gave me a hug but I gave him the fakest smile ever. He knew I was pissed. He walked away. Craig came over to me and tried to grab my hand but I moved it out of his reach.
"What's wrong?" He smiled. Why the fuck was he smiling?
"Craig you completely ignored me to talk to some groupie slut." I spat. She wasn't a groupie slut but that's just the natural girl in me.
"Oh Manny." Craig laughed trying to grab my hand yet again but I moved it.
"Craig, why are you laughing? I'm for real mad." I told him. He kept laughing. He seems so different. I walked off down the sidewalk from him. He ran after me and yanked me up in the air. As much as I hated to it actually made me smile.
"Craig." I laughed. He put me down and looked at me. I stopped laughing.
"You hurt my feelings." I said in a pretend little kid voice while pouting.
"I'm so sorry. I don't think I could ever forgive myself. Please, Please, Please let me make it up to you." he smiled. Damn it's so hard for me to stay mad at him.
"O.k."
"Ah great. Let's go."
We walked to the bus stop and waited for the bus to come. We didn't have to wait long it was just up the street. He's been getting taxis all day and now he decides to take a bus.
"Why the bus?" I asked him curiously as we stepped on.
"It's better." He said putting the money in the slot. We sat in the very back. The sun was starting to go down just a tad.
"Where are we going?" I asked him.
"You will see." He said looking out the window. We drove down the same street basically.
"C'mon." Craig grabbed my hand, "This is our stop."
We walked to the exit and waited for the doors to open. Craig seemed so cheerful. He told the driver bye and everything. We got out and started walking down the sidewalk.
"Are we almost there?" I asked. I hope I wasn't being annoying.
"Yea." He looked at me staring directly into my eyes, "We are almost there."
We walked for another couple minutes. He didn't even have to tell me. I knew we were there. He took me to the beach. It looked amazing. Completely different then the Canadian beaches.
"Craig, wow." I said letting go of his hand and running to the sand. He walked up to catch up to me.
"Craig this is beautiful." I told him looking at the sky. The sun was setting and it was gorgeous. All types of shades of pinks and oranges. I couldn't take my eyes off it.
"I knew you would love it." He said now looking at it as intensely I was. I was actually able to look away.
"Craig you so get me." I said looking at him. He's so amazing.
"Of course I do. You're the most important thing to me." He said sweetly.
"I've been waiting to give you this all day." He said as he reached in his pocket, "Here." He gave me a small box. I didn't know what to say. I just took it. When I opened it there was a ring inside. I was speechless. I was holding the box when he took the ring out of it.
"Promise me you will be mine forever." Craig said.
"I promise."
He smiled so wide. I can't believe this. How did I get a guy like this. He put the ring on my finger. It fit perfectly. When I looked down I immediately noticed the box. It looked like the box that J.T. had given me the night I cheated on Craig. How could I do something so horrible? How could I do something so horrible to the one I love? My eyes started tearing up. I made a small sniffle.
"Manny, what's wrong?" Craig asked concerned.
"I-" I couldn't possibly tell him why I was about to cry, "I just love you so much."
Craig smiled and let out a sigh of relief. He pulled me towards him for a hug. We stood there holding each other. We sat down and watched the sunset together. It was beautiful. For the next hour we said nothing just watched. It started getting cold. I rubbed my upper arms with my hands.
"Yea it is getting cool." Craig said, "We should go."
He stood up then helped me up. We walked on the sidewalk. We passed several little convenient stores. He had his arm around my waist. He stopped walking.
"Hey uh, let me stop in here for a second." Craig said while pointing to a liquor store. What, I thought Craig drinks now.
"What are you gonna get?"
"A bottle or 2." He smiled, "You don't want any?"
"No, I'll drink some. It's just, since when do you drink?" I asked him.
"It's no big deal really. Stay here. I'll be right back." He told me before going inside. I waited. Craig is so different than what I remember. He smokes and drinks now. I wonder what other things he does now, I thought as I stood there. He wasn't in there long.
"Lets go." He said after walking out.
"How were you able to buy that?" I asked really wondering how.
"I know the guy that works there." He explained.
"That's good."
"Lets head back to your room." He said grabbing my hand. We went to the edge of the sidewalk to hail a cab. He got one right away. The cab ride was quick. We were there like that.
"Thanks." Craig told the cab driver. We both got out and went inside. We went through the lobby straight to the elevators. We had to wait though. When it did come down like 5 other people went inside when we were going inside.
"Uh 6 please." Craig said to the woman who asked what floor.
"Bye" I said to the people in the elevator as me and Craig stepped out. We headed down the hallway and into my room.
"It has been such a long day." Craig said closing the door. I threw my bags on the floor. As did Craig.
"Yea I know." I yawned. I have been so tired ever since I left Canada. I took my shoes off. Craig started looking through some of his stuff. I yawned again. I pulled the covers back and crawled in I was laying on my stomach holding the pillow. I was so comfortable. I really wanted to sleep. Craig noticed and started walking over to the bed.
"Ohhhh no you don't.." He said turning me over and climbing on top of me. I smiled a little.
"Craig I'm tired." I yawned yet again. He looked down at his pocket. He got up to his knees. I sat up to see what he was doing.
"No problem." He said as he pulled out a small bag. Oh my God. Is that what I think it is, I thought.
"Craig is that crystal?" I asked shocked. He laughed,
"Yea."
"Craig." I said sitting all the way up, "Just what the fuck is going on with you?"
"What are you talking about?" He asked as if there was no problem.
"I mean you smoke and you drink and now you do crystal."
"Your point?" he said smiling.
"Well what happened to that shit's bad for you Manny?"
"I didn't know how good it was then. You, my love, should have offered me some a long time ago." He said shaking his finger at me. I didn't know what to think. Part of me was happy but the other part was confused.
"Now" He paused and came back down to me, "You gonna let me get high alone?"
This was so bizarre. But, c'mon, seriously, I would never pass on crystal.
"Of course not." I answered. He smiled and came down to kiss me. He pulled me up and we went into the bathroom. There was a marble counter in there. Perfect for cutting powder.
"You got a razor?" Craig asked. He smirked, "Of course you do. Where is your razor?"
I didn't know how to take that but oh well.
"It's in my make-up compact, on the counter."
He went out to get it. He returned with the compact and the vodka. He handed me the compact and began to poor the vodka into the complementary little mouthwash cup in the bathroom.
"Here." Craig told me as he put the cup up to my lips and poured it in my mouth. A drip fell down and Craig licked it off my chin.
"Ewwwwaaa." I frowned. He laughed. While I got some of the crystal out of the bag to cut it, Craig poured himself a shot and drank it. He poured himself another. I was cutting the crystal. He then looked at me and put his hand on his hip. I stopped.
"Is there a problem?" I smiled turning to him.
"Uh let me." Craig said taking the razor out of my hand. He started cutting the crystal. He was doing it really fast but well. I stood next to him and watched.
"So, how long have u been doing meth?" I asked him.
"Not long. Just a little while." He was so fixated on getting it cut so finely. "Have another shot."
I did. Craig was finally done.
"You got a straw?" He asked. I went over to my purse to see if I had any in there and I did. I went back to the bathroom. I put my hand out to give it to him.
"Ladies first."
"O.k." I smiled. I kneeled down to the counter to snort the lines. I'm so happy I'm able to do this. I had no idea when the next time I would be able to get high would be.
"That a girl." Craig said rubbing my head. I stood back up. He took the straw and bent down to snort his lines. He came back up and rubbed his nose a little. He smiled at me and then grabbed the bottle to drink some more. I don't know why but I felt as if I had to keep up with him so I snatched the bottle away from him and started drinking more.
"Please, drink all you want." Craig said looking at me. I brought the bottle down and me and Craig proceeded out of the bathroom. Craig sat on the bed and I stood over by the window. The remote was sitting on the bed and he noticed. It worked for the t.v. and the radio. He reached for it and aimed it at the radio to turn it on. There was a pretty sexy song playing. Craig leaned back and rested on his arms. I liked the song so I started to move to the music. Craig was smiling. I walked over closer to him, until I was right in front of him. I could tell that he was liking it so I danced a little more provocative.
"Manny, baby, I have been wanting that for tooooo long." Craig expressed sounding very eager. I smiled and was feeling slightly buzzed. He was getting that way to. He adjusted himself down there the way that guys do. I took off my shirt and threw it to the side. Craig sat up all the way. He put his hand on the inside of my pants and pulled me to him. He started kissing my stomach and rubbing my thighs. I hugged him kind of. The crystal started to kick in for the both of us I think. Craig then stood up. We were both so giggly and had plenty energy. We started kissing. God I could kiss him for hours, he was always so good but it felt a little different this time.
"Ow" I smiled. Craig bit my lip as he pulled away. I wasn't expecting that. He started walking forward which made me back up. He lifted me in the air and pinned me against the wall. I gasped. I kind of liked it. He started kissing my neck and shoulders. I held my head back against the wall. He got me off the wall and was just holding me. My legs were wrapped around him. He took me over to the bed and just dropped me then walked over to get the vodka bottle. He stood there and drank a whole bunch and then took off his pants. He got on the bed and put the bottle in my mouth and tilted it. It was coming out so fast. I turned my head away and a lot spilled on me.
"Crrrraig." I spat. He was so full of sarcasm. Craig took the bottle, drank some, then put it on the floor. He climbed on top of me after taking his shirt off. I so missed the weight of him laying on me. He was touching me all over. He stopped to pull my pants off, while kneeling between my legs. I couldn't wait any longer.
"So, come down here and show me you're a man boy." I smiled.
"Oh yea." He laughed.
"Yea."
Craig then grabbed my thighs and pulled me to him roughly. He tried to reach over me to get a condom but I stopped him.
"No." I told him, "I wanna feel you inside me."
He entered me and it felt great. There was no taking it easy, we went at it. Craig was being so forceful. I couldn't get enough of it. We weren't even kissing or anything just pure sex.
"Oh my god Craig." I smiled. I was breathing so hard. He stopped.
"Turn over." he suggested. I turned over into the doggie style position. Craig grabbed my ass/waist so tight. A hand on each side and shoved it back in.
"You like that?" He asked.
"Uh huh." I breathed. We had sex and did drugs for what seemed like forever. He had so much crystal. Like an ounce I think. We finally settled down some time in the a.m. We were both sitting on the bed so restless, from the drugs.
"I am so not tired." I said smoking a cigarette after getting up to put a t-shirt on. I wasn't complaining, I liked being up with Craig and being high. Craig got up as well. He went over to where his pants were and reached inside his pocket. To my surprise there was another little baggie. It was pills this time.
"Here." Craig handed me one, "Take these with some liquor."
"What are they?"
"They will make us tired."
"I don't wanna be tired." I said walking closer to him, "I feel great. I want this feeling to last forever."
"Yea it is great but I want to sleep with you."
I was puzzled, "Why?"
"Well sleeping together means something. You can fuck anybody but you sleep with the person you love." He said with an expression I can't even describe. I wish that I had a camera to capture the moment.
"O.k." I agreed. I popped the pills and went for the vodka.
"Not to much liquor Manny." Craig warned, "Those pills are strong. It doesn't take much."
"O.k." I responded. I handed the bottle to him and he took his. He wasn't lying when he said they were strong. After about 30 minutes I could barely keep my eyes open. There was a euphoric feeling that accompanied the sleepiness. I had tracers. It was cool.
"Where did you get these? They're awesome." I mumbled to Craig as we lay in bed together.
"From a friend." He answered. He made sure I was covered up pretty well and then turned over to turn the light off. He got super close to me and put his arm around me. I felt so secure and safe with him.
"Manny I missed you so much. It was hell without you." He said to me.
"Same here. I was gonna die if I had to be without you any longer."
"I love you." He told me.
"I love you to."
He pulled me closer to him and the two of us drifted off to sleep peacefully. It was a deep sleep. As if I was sedated or something. Around 6:30 a.m. I heard a noise in my sleep. It woke me up. Craig had gotten up to pee. I looked over at my cell phone to see what time it was. I saw that it was still early and laid my head back down to go back to sleep. Craig came out like a minute after. He crawled back in to bed and I could like feel him looking at me. I didn't say anything though. He leaned down to me.
"Manny, Manny I know you're dreaming," He whispered in my ear, "And I hope its about me." He concluded. He kissed my cheek and then laid back down holding me. I am so in love with this guy. I just don't know what I would do without him. We both slept until like 1:00 in the afternoon. He woke up first though. He was looking out the window drinking a cup of coffee. I sat up.
"Good morning." I yawned.
"Morning beautiful." Craig said now looking my direction.
"Is there more coffee?" I asked.
"Yea." he pointed. He went over to pour me a cup. I got up to go to where he was. He sat down in a chair and I sat on his lap. I laid my head back.
"Did you sleep well?" he asked.
"Hellz yes. Those pills had me knocked out."
"Same here. Are you hungry?"
"Yea I could eat something." I answered. "Where do you wanna go?"
"Lets order it." He suggested.
"O.k." I got up to get the hotel menu and went back over to Craig. There were so many things to chose from.
"What are you getting?" I asked him.
"I think umm waffles. What do you want?"
"Umm I think an omelet." I answered.
"Cool." Craig went over to the phone to order the food. He stayed on the bed. I went to pee. When I came out Craig was laying on the bed smoking one of my cigarettes. He looked sexy smoking. I went over to the bed and straddled him taking the cigarette out of his mouth and then putting it in mine.
"Thank you." I said playfully to him. He laughed.
"What do you wanna do today?" I asked him.
"I don't know. Umm lets go swimming. I bet the pool here is enormous."
"Yea it probably is. I haven't been swimming in forever."
"I bet your gonna look super sexy all wet." Craig said lifting my shirt a little.
"Yea sure." I said sarcastically.
"You know Manny, you should really stop pretending that you think you look bad. You're just looking for compliments when you do that huh?" Craig said laughing.
"Ugh" I said playfully hitting him, "I don't do that."
"Yea ya do."
"Do not."
"Do to." he sat up and pushed me back on the bed and began tickling me. The both of us started laughing. We didn't even hear the bellboy come in with breakfast.
"Excuse me." The bellboy said trying to get our attention in a bitchy tone. He looked gay. Me and Craig stopped immediately from embarrassment. Craig got up and walked over to him. I still had the cigarette in my hand. The guy kind of gave me a snobby look.
"This is a none smoking room ma'am. Your going to have to put that out."
"Oh uh sorry." I told him walking over to find some where to put it out. Craig and I both noticed him looking in the bathroom. The door was wide open and there was residue along with the razor still on the counter. Craig hurried to shut the bathroom door. The guy gave Craig a dirty look then walked over to the table to put the food down there. Craig went over to his pants pocket and got his wallet to pay him.
"Here you go, thanks man." Craig said handing the bellboy some money.
"Enjoy your breakfast." he said then walked out.
"Can you say fag?" Craig said going to have a seat. I followed.
"I know right." I agreed sitting. Craig poured us some juice.
"Thank you."
We both began eating.
"Mmmm this is so good." I expressed about my omelet.
"Yea this waffle is pretty good." He mumbled. His mouth was full. He ate so fast it took me awhile. I finished not long after.
"Did you still wanna go swimming?" Craig asked.
"Yea. I'll find out what floor it's on"
"It says here 7th floor." Craig responded. The two of us then got ready to leave.
JT POV
I was walking out my room to head down to the lobby. I was contemplating rather or not I should ask Manny if she wanted to do something today. I was thinking maybe lunch or a movie. As I walked down the hallway I saw Manny coming up with a guy. Is that Craig, I thought, Where did he come from. Manny had one hand on his shoulder and was walking on her tippy toes to whisper something in his ear. I would love to know what she was telling him. He was smiling so wide. They both looked so happy together. As they got closer and closer I kind of moved towards where the other elevators were. There were like 2 sets of elevators on each floor. They walked right by. Didn't even notice me.
"MANNY" I heard a woman yell, "WILL YOU COME HERE FOR A MOMENT?" it was Ms. H.
"I'll be back." Manny said to Craig then went down to Ms. H. Craig stood there as she went inside Ms. H's room. An elevator came up and some people got out which drew attention to the area I was standing.
"J.T." Craig said.
"Yea." I walked over to him.
"How's it goin?" He asked.
"Oh Um fine. What are you doing here?"
"I came to surprise Manny." He smiled. I was trying my best to not seem bitter. I don't know if it worked or not. I nodded. "Did you guys hang out any while I was gone?" He continued.
"Yea, a few times. I tried to keep an eye out for her."
"Well how was she? Like did she get into any trouble or anything?" He asked concerned.
"Not that I know of." I was standing there with my hands in my pockets.
"Good I was worried about her the whole time I was on tour. Thanks good lookin out J.T. She's such a mess without me ya know." Craig said with a laugh kinda.
"What do you mean?" I asked. I would love to hear his answer.
"Me and Manny both know that she needs me. Like she can't function without me or something." He said. Arrogant asshole. What makes him so fuckin great, I thought.
"But it's cool, her needing me so much. I know no other guy will ever get what I got." he said smiling. I couldn't help myself.
"What makes you so sure that Manny is that in to you? Like what makes you so confident?" I asked him waiting to see what the asshole had to say.
"Trust me. I just know."
"I wouldn't be so sure of that." I told him. I should have stopped right there. The happy expression on his face changed drastically. I guess he was thinking about what I had just said.
"What?" he asked dumbfounded. J.T. don't do it, don't do it, I thought.
"Me and Manny fucked and wow, she functions perfectly." I said. Why did I just do that? I didn't know what else to do. I just walked away.
CRAIG POV
I just stood there as J.T. walked away. Oh my God. Did he just say that he fucked Manny, I thought. I was in disbelief. My brain was having trouble processing this. Not my Manny. Not my Manny that loves me, that needs me more than anything. I couldn't believe this. I love Manny so much she would never do that. I brushed my hair off my head with my hand. I looked over at Manny. She was smiling her beautiful smile. I looked down for a second then back up at Manny. Manny was done talking to Ms. H. She was walking towards me.
MANNY POV
I started to walk back over towards Craig. He was doing short paces back and forth. When he saw me he stopped. He started walking towards me. The look on his face was indescribable.
"Craig what's going on?" I asked. He didn't say anything. He grabbed my arm and pulled me around the corner to a secluded area but we were still visible. He was breathing heavy. He put me against the wall then let go.
"Craig" I began.
"J.T. told me that he had sex with you. Why would he say that?" Craig said looking at me. My heart started beating like 1,000 beats a second. I cant believe that I didn't have a heart attack right there. I wish that I had and died but I wasn't that lucky. I was speechless. His eyes were watery.
"Manny tell me that's not true." Craig said looking directly into my eyes. I really wanted to die. God please have mercy, please strike me dead, I beg you, I thought. I couldn't say anything. I could barely breath.
"Manny…Manny, why aren't you saying anything?" He said in a louder tone getting much closer to me. I turned away but Craig turned my head to his direction with his hand. My eyes filled with tears. Some fell down. Craig put both of his hands on my face and put his head close to mine and was crying. I've never seen Craig cry like this before. I placed my hands on top of his.
"Manny, baby please tell me that you didn't do that." He begged me but I couldn't.
"I can't." I said almost silently but he heard me. Craig let out a huge whimper noise.
"No" He said over and over. He pushed me away from him. He started crying harder. I started crying just as hysterically as Craig was.
"Oh God Manny how could you do this? I fuckin love you so much. Why would you do this?" He cried.
"I'm sorry." I tried to tell him.
"How could you do this?" He yelled looking at me with his eyes full of tears.
"Craig I love you." I cried trying to come closer to him but he backed away. He didn't say anything at first. He wiped his tears away. He was breathing so heavy. I'm surprised he didn't pass out.
"Manny I could kill you." He said angry.
"I love you." I said barely able to get it out. There was a silence. All you could hear was me whimpering.
"Fuck you slut." Craig said looking at me with a look of disgust.
"Craig please." I said as I touched his arm. "I love you.
He then flinched to make my hand come off his arm. He gave me this cold harsh stare. I couldn't tell if he was going to kill me or laugh or cry.
"I don't love whores I just fuck em."
I felt my heart fall to the ground. He stood there a second as if he couldn't believe that he actually said that. I couldn't believe that he actually said that shit. Then there was a noise from around the corner. Craig turned around and it was J.T. I had no idea what J.T. was doing there.
"Craig" J.T. said coming from around the corner, "Just lay off. Leave her alone".
"What? Leave her alone. You have really got some fuckin balls man." Craig said clinching his fist together." You fucked my girlfriend while I was gone and you have the balls to tell me to leave her alone!" I could tell J.T. was a little scared. Craig walked really close to him.
"Stay out of this. Or else I'll fuck you up and I'm dead serious." Craig said then turned back to me about to tell me something when-
"Just leave her alone." J.T. said. Craig turned back around towards J.T. He didn't say anything he just went up to J.T with a weird smile on his face. J.T just stood there unaware of what to do. Craig then let out a sigh laugh and punched him. My eyes grew so wide.
"Craig" I gasped.
J.T. fell back. Blood was coming from his nose. He got up and lunged himself at Craig. Craig caught him and pushed him back .J.T then punched Craig on the jaw. Then it grew quiet. Craig felt his jaw and then pushed him to the ground and started kicking him in his stomach. J.T. was curled up on his side covering his stomach but Craig was still able to get his foot there. He then got on top of him and started punching like a mad man. I had to stop this. I ran over to Craig.
"Craig." I said pulling on his arm. He kept on punching without any regard to what surrounded him. People started to look out their doors and stare at the fight.
"Craig, Craig stop" I begged him. He finally stopped. J.T began gasping for air. Craig looked at me then looked at my hand on his arm. I let go immediately for once in my life I feared Craig.
"What, you wanna save him, you wanna be with him?" Craig looked so hurt, his eyes glistened. "You go to him then." Craig said as he grabbed my arm and threw me down to the ground next to J.T.
"You fuck him stay with him! You know what fuck you!" He then pulled a five dollar bill out of his pocket." There I paid my whore!" Craig hiccupped because now he was crying. He took one more look at me and walked away. J.T. wasn't saying anything. I looked at him and began trying to help him up but somehow I felt so numb about what he told me.
"Manny, I'm sorry. If I didn't come maybe things wouldn't have gotten so bad." J.T said once he was completely to his feet. He sounded very sincere.
"It's not your fault." I responded. Both of us were silent. There was nothing to say. J.T. just walked away and I just stood there.. I backed up against the wall. I felt like I was gonna faint. I slid down the wall. Tears came down like a faucet. I felt like I was dying. This must be what death feels like. Then again right now death would be so much better...
J.T. POV
Damn I thought. I walked away holding my side. It hurt like a bitch. I honestly don't blame Craig for his reaction. I mean I would have done the same thing most defiantly .Manny said it wasn't my fault, but it was. I knew I shouldn't have had sex with her.. That was so stupid for me to tell Craig. I felt horrible. I guess I just wanted Manny for myself. Thanks to my jealousy...I walked in the elevator door as I heard the security guards come. As the door closed I saw Manny on the floor leaning against the wall with her eyes at a blank she looked over at me but the doors began to close just like my romance life with her...I lost her for good.
Normal POV
Manny was out of it. She couldn't focus on anything good the only thing, the only word, the only one, she was focused on was Craig's words...his words...
I don't Love whores, I just fuck 'em.
As she tried to move her head to see what the commotion was about two security guards were there.
"Ma'am I need you to stand up and come with us. "They said as they held out a hand to help her up.
She ended up just sitting there so the security guard had to hoist her up and in a way carry her to the elevator. They then pressed G button. They were going down to the ground floor.
"As you know Miss we don't allow fighting and disturbance of any kind in this hotel. "He said looking at Manny. She just nodded. They reached the ground floor and they took her into the office. As they were taking her one of the students recognized Manny and called out. "Ms. H!"
They then took Manny into the Hotel Manager's office.
"Have a seat." The young man said. He had jet black hair and green eyes. His suit was neat as he was smoking a Cigar.
"Let's see as I look into this I see you are on the trip from Degrassi am I correct?" He asked looking at the computer to his right.
Even though Manny was hurt, and hallow inside she knew she had to speak.
"Yes." Her voice came out raspy from everything that has happened to her.
"And might I add were you involved in a fight that accrued on my property? Where rude words were exchanged?" He asked Manny.
Manny knew she was in trouble now. Her heart wasn't even focused on this. She looked up and nodded.
"I take this as a yes. Well Miss. Santos room 616 am I correct?" He asked Manny.
She again nodded she couldn't find the strength to answer him.
"Well Miss. Santos I run a professional business you see all this? I am in charge and what you did is inexcusable and I will not tolerate this behavior under any circumstances. You have disturbed a lot of my customers on your floor. They have complained and there were children there. My hands are tied. If I have complaints I have to see that the person is fully punished. In a few minutes we will have someone check your room to make sure no other-um funny business is going on and-"
Just when Manny was about to protest about the room inspection the secretary barged in.
"So sorry to interrupt sir but we have an angry principal who wishes to speak to you about the girl."
He sighed and gestured his hands to let her in.
Mrs. H barged in angry.
"You sir have no right to question an underage student without any guardian or supervision or parent! This is simply unjust no matter what the circumstances were! I am in charge of Miss. Santos-"
"Excuse me Miss. Hatali-um Mrs. H. Your student has caused damage to this hotel reputation. There was a fight and some rude words exchanged on my floor! I have had complaints and as far as I'm concerned I have every right." He spoke quietly.
"No you don't," Mrs. H then turned to Manny. "Manuella please go to your room as soon as I get this whole thing sorted out we will indeed have a talk."
Manny was afraid to look up at Mrs. H. She didn't want to see the look of shame or disappointment. But since Mrs. H was defending her she had no other choice but to look up and she knew she had to reply.
It was just as she suspected. Mrs. H did have that look on her face.
"Yes." Manny's voice came out hoarse. "I'm sorry."
With those words Manny began to walk out of the office. As soon as she walked out there were people waiting outside. Half of them were the people from the floor Manny recognized when the fight went on. The other half, well most of them were her classmates. She felt embarrassed that now most of them thought she was a whore again. She knew she had to get to her room fast.
"Hey Manny why-"
Before one of her classmates had a chance to finish asking Manny ran as fast as she could. She didn't bother taking the elevator she had to get to her room quick and made sure no one could follow her.
She was so tired and she was going up the stairs as fast as she could. Her lungs started to feel like ice and she was more like gasping for air than breathing.
MANNY POV
My lungs were icy and it burned to breathe. My eyes and my lungs hurt so bad. I wanted to slow down but I knew I couldn't. I had to keep running up the stairs. It was so hard and the stairs somehow seemed to be getting longer and longer. It was getting more and more difficult but I couldn't stop I had to keep running. I turned the corner and as soon as I did there was spilled water and I tried to grab the rail but I couldn't and I fell. A serge of pain entered my knee and I immediately grabbed it hoping in some way the pressure of my hand would take the pain away.
"Ow!." I hissed.
My breathing was so bad I looked like a fish out of water. I then got the wall and leaned on it to try to get up. Sweat was everywhere. My skin was glistening from the corner light on the stair case. I then gasped I looked up at the light and it made me realize something.
These stairs and my running was exactly like my life. I was running away from my problems. I had to stop running and take a breath. As I was doing. Yet again life itself was making me run. I sighed and then banged my head against the wall. It hurt but by now I was used to pain so it was whatever to me. I slowly got up and began walking up the stairs. I finally made it to the top of the stairs even though it took me longer than anticipated. I seemed to care less now that they might kick me out. I was more relaxed. I don't know why. Maybe it was because I knew if I did get in trouble I would run away...far away...where no one could ever find me or catch me...
I don't love whores I just fuck 'em!
I shook my head. That sentence seemed to be haunting me. Okay...I just need to calm down. I reached in my pocket and pulled out my pack of cigz. I then remembered how they don't allow smoking on our floor. Ha! I turned and saw a camera. I then lit my cig took a puff and breathed it out. I then looked up at the camera and flipped it off. I began to walk towards my room. I was about to slide the card to let me in when it was already opening. I stepped back. Oh shit what if someone was in there? I actually felt my chest get cold. Oh no they will kick me out and-
What I saw made me feel even worse. Why does every time I think I've reached rock bottom. He looked at me and I saw his stuff all clumped up in his hands.
He just looked at me and laughed.
"Oh wow." He then walked away without saying anything after that. I just stood there. I then turned to him.
"O wow what the fuck does that mean?"
CRAIG POV
I had just sniffed some lines before I left. I had to make this trip worth it. Well to be honest my eyes were still burning form the tears I cried. I really loved, I still love her and I couldn't believe she would do that to me...I mean why would she do that to me? But when I opened the door as soon as I gathered all my stuff I saw her there. She still looked beautiful even though she looked like shit. It's weird to explain. I couldn't believe I still loved her after all this. Then I remembered what she did. The image of her screaming someone else's name and panting hard and someone's, might I add smaller, dick inside her. Made me feel dirty. I didn't know what to say. All I can manage to say was.
"Oh wow.." I then laughed a little as I began to walk out the door. I'm so fucked up right now.
Then I heard her.
"Oh wow what the fuck does that mean?"
I turned back to her. She looked angry but I could tell she was hurt. Yet she was acting like a little bitch. If she wanted an answer she was getting one.
"It's just amazing how you can be so calm, but oh well I guess when girls like you do what you do you're immune to it." I immediately regretted what I said. Fuck why did I have to take those fuckin lines! Maybe if I didn't I could of tried to talk to her. No, no, no what she did was wrong! Just wrong, She shouldn't have done what she did! She is a slut. But why am I so in love with her?
She then looked at me and stomped on her cig.
"Girls like me!" She asked angrily as she went up to my face.
I was in the zone right now. I needed to fix my heart with revenge. My heart hurt too much to be broken again. My soul needed something to temporary fill the gap. She hurt me and now she needed to be hurt back.
"Yeah you know. The ones that have fuck buddies when their boyfriends are away." I said casually.
"You are such an ass-"
"May be an ass but I'm not a slut Manny." I added in. Her eyes grew intensely of rage. How revenge was sweet. Yet my heart was hurting at the same time. I don't know why. Why am I finding myself so confused on my choices now?
"Fuck you Craig. You think you are the fuckin shit when your nothing you're a fuckin meth addict." She hissed with her head slightly tilted.
"Me? Ha! Sweetie look in the mirror you junkie. Are you even sure when your high or not?" I snapped back dropping my clothes getting a little mad myself. She then made a gesture like she was going to scream but instead made this weird sigh noise as she walked away and back to me with her finger in the air pointing at me. "Nice vacation huh? Bet your wishin you never slept with the penis pumping fetis! Man you really like to ruin friendships."
"Well hello you were the fucking idiot who messes everything up! You always ruin things and expect to be forgiven you a fucking cocky bastard! And you know what the world doesn't revolve around you!" Manny screamed at me. Okay now she was getting me angry.
"Oh you know what Manny fuck you, you little cunt." I said right in her face. I was standing super close 2 her. Directly in her face.
"Excuse me?" She asked shocked at what I said to tell you the truth I was even shocked.
"You heard me" Was all I could say. She then seemed to be on the verge of tears as she backed up. I wanted so bad to go hold her and tell her it was okay. I would kill anyone that hurt her, but I was the one hurting her and it hurt me to do so. But she had hurt me so much more. I needed my revenge. I just need to keep telling myself that. Or was it the drugs telling me right now I have no idea.
"You are a life ruiner! You like to kill everything you fuckin bastard" She shouted at my face.
"Me a life ruiner and kill? Ha! dear you shouldn't even be stating those words" I yelled.
"Cr-"
"Since you were the one who killed my fuckin child" I shouted almost at tears myself.
"You wouldn't even have been there! Too busy with Ashley:"
"You know what I'm glad I played you"
"Cr-"
"No bitch listen, u need to know where u stand with me and with all guys and with the world" I said looking at her like she was shit.
"Where I stand?"
"Yes you are a slut! Get it. No one ever takes u seriously unless they want u in bed. Your a quick fuck. A one night stand girl who you can toss around. You're just something to stare at you'll never be taken seriously so go shake your ass and get some money or go fuck a guy in the alley because you're never gonna be above that ever." I shouted. I knew that was bad because she was quiet.
"Fuck…you. You orphan bi-polar asshole." She said calmly.
"Well tell your daddy that he was right. His daughter was too much of a whore. That's why he left you guys to be with another family less dysfunctional." I spat. I knew I couldn't say anymore I had gone too far. Right then I wanted to apologize but something in me made me want to leave as soon as possible I was about to say something but I just couldn't. I don't know why but I just turned and began walking away. I took one last look at the girl. With the broken smile. With the broken body. With the broken soul. The one I loved. The one that broke my heart. In return I made sure I did the same. I'm not sure if I regret it or not. But as I walk down these stairs and see her just standing there not moving. I'm starting to think I made the wrong choice. I then go downstairs. SHIT! I forgot my shit inside her room!. Ah fuck I can't go back...fuckin shit man...oh well…I can't go back. I won't go back. My heart was hurting. Literally. I guess it's true you think that people are making it up when they say their hearts hurt and ache but it's true I can feel it in my chest.
MANNY POV
It's funny. No wait. Hilarious. It's been two days since it's happened at it feels like years. The door remains closed . Locked. No one can enter this place. No one can see me. The only person who has heard my voice was Mrs. H when she went to my room.
"I've discussed it and it seems that you didn't start this fight according to witnesses but you were involved. I tried my best and it seems that a non Degrassi student started the fight. Even though it was a shock to see that it was Craig Manning, he is officially not enrolled since he is on his tour and he will enroll when school starts up again. Until then you are not allowed out of this hotel. You will remain in this structure for the remain of the trip or until I say so. I'm very disappointed in you. James Tiberious has had a talk with and he is under the same punishment. His grandparents have been informed. I have tried contacting your parents but it seems no one has picked up the phone. So I will try again later. Try to get some rest Manny, it looks like you need it." Mrs. H told me.
I nodded. I was about to close the door when she turned back.
"Oh and they aren't going to check your room I made it unnecessary. I said your a student and you are under my supervision, so don't worry about that, but they can check it at anytime ,it is their hotel...so just keep your room clean."
I nodded again and closed the door. My days were lonely. Nights, even lonelier. I would just sit for hours and I seemed to have slowly built up hatred for J.T. Yorke. Random guys from school would knock on my door to purposely be obnoxious.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
I normally ignored them but I just so happen to be passing by the door at that very moment. I'm sure they aren't expecting to have to actually look at my face as they ridicule me. I wasn't to shocked to see Sully at my door. I stood there with the door only open enough to fit like my head ya know.
"So Manny, I hear you're back to your old self again. I'm still so bitter about the fact that I never got a chance." he said smiling and looked as if he was about to walk away. Why shouldn't he get a chance I thought, I mean I really should start living up to my name, my reputation.
"Well come get it then." I said to him. His expression changed.
"Come get what?"
"Come get your chance."
He looked around then stepped really close to me, "Manny are you serious?"
"Don't I look serious." I said then walked away but leaving the door open to completely welcome him in. He looked around once more, I'm assuming to make sure that no one saw him come in my room. I don't blame him one bit. I saw one of the liquor bottles on the table. One had never even been opened. I walked over and took a huge gulp, and then got on the bed. I was on my back but was supporting myself with my elbows. Sully was inside by then. He was standing in front of me.
"I'm yours for the taking." I said plainly and expressionless.
He started taking his shirt off. He wasn't trying to waist any time what so ever.
"Gah damn Manny. I have been wanting to fuck you for awhile now." He said just getting his shirt over his head. He took a condom out of his back pocket and unzipped his pants to put it on. Once it was on he crawled on the bed. I laid all the way back completely.
"Mannuela." He said as he ran his hands up my thighs. His hands were no where near as soft as Craig's were. When he got to my panties he ripped them off with one pull. He spread my legs more so that he could get closer. When he got to the button down shirt I was wearing he ripped it completely open. He was more aggressive than I would have ever imagined. He squeezed my boobs really hard. He came close to my face as if he was going to kiss me but he stopped right as he almost got close to my lips.
"Yea right." He said with a laugh. He kissed my neck instead. He stopped, sat up, and lifted my waist a little then stuck his dick in like I was just some whole not a person. I did nothing, just arched my back a little from the discomfort. He started going in and out with a very fast pace.
"Fuck Manny, we should have done this when we were together." He expressed just thrusting away. I had no response to him. Not even a smile.
"No wonder Craig made such a big deal."
The second he said his name my eyes began to water. I turned my head to the side so that Sully wouldn't see me. Tears fell down on to my pillow. When I brought my hand up to my face to try and wipe some tears away Sully grabbed my hand and pinned it to the bed. He started to go faster and faster and it started to feel more uncomfortable.
"Tell me you like it." he said in a very low almost creepy way. I was a little zoned out and wasn't really listening.
"Tell me you like it." He said again sounding slightly annoyed. He pushed it in really hard and deep I'm assuming 2 get my attention. It hurt.
" Ugh" I groaned looking up at him. I didn't want to but it was my instincts.
"Tell me, you like it." He said in a very dictating voice.
"I like it." I said in a cracky tone of voice. He seemed to be finally finishing. I'm glad cuz this was really starting to become awkward.
"Manny." He panted. He was done. He slowly got off me. I pulled my shirt to cover me a little and sat up.
"That was great." Sully said patting me on the back. He started getting dressed.
J.T. POV
Staying in my room was torture. All there was to do was think. I thought about Manny most of the time and how all of this was my fault. I really wanted to see her. Just to see how she was holding up. I may get in trouble but I don't care. The class will be leaving like in 2 days anyways. I was able to sneak out of my room. I took the stairs to get to her floor so no one saw me. As I headed down the hallway I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I saw Sully, of all people, leaving her room. I didn't let him see me. When he was gone I headed to her room. It was unlocked. When I walked in Manny looked to be like pulling up some shorts that she was putting on. She heard me come in.
"Ugh. Don't you knock?" She said closing up her shirt and turning around.
"Why was Sully leaving your room?" I asked her boldly.
"What?" She asked walking closer to me.
"Manny you're better than that. You don't have to do that."
"Well, that's what I do." Manny went over to the t.v. and got her cigarettes from off the top of it. She lit one and started smoking it then sat on the edge of the bed.
"Manny, what's happen to you?" I asked concerned.
"What are you talking about J.T.?" she said as she got up and walked to the window.
"You're not the same person anymore."
"Oh well" She expressed as she exhaled cigarette smoke. I have always hated seeing her smoke. I wish she wouldn't. I really didn't know how to act around her. I wanted to be there for her. Be her friend.
"Manny," I paused, "Is there, anything, you need, or something?" I asked her.
"No. I don't need anything. Especially from you." She said giving me a cold look. I didn't expect a reaction like that. She turned and headed back towards the view outside the window.
"Manny don't act like that. Look I know things seem pretty bad right now but there is always tomorrow. When we get home-"
"Home, fuck home. I'm not going back." she said looking back my way.
"What do you mean you're not going back?" I asked stunned.
"Just that. I'm not going back. I have nothing to go back to."
"That's not true. What about Emma?" I asked.
"Emma is better off without me. I'm just a burden to her and her family anyways." she spat.
"Well, what about me?" I asked hoping that her answer was something I could bare. She was silent.
"What about you?" She walked really close to me and took a puff of her cigarette, "I fucking hate you." She expressed as she exhaled the smoke in my face. She looked at me for a second then went back to the window and left me standing there. Jesus. I knew she was probably mad at me but hate me. I wasn't ready for that. All there was left to do was leave. Before I walked out I took another look at her knowing that I would probably never see her again. I looked and then walked out making sure the door was shut.
MANNY POV
I almost regret saying what I said to J.T. I don't hate him. I just hate what I did with him. I wish he didn't see Sully leaving here. I wish a lot of things. I finished my cigarette. My mind was blank. It was true. All this time before .I thought I was a stupid worthless whore. I was. I really was a slut. Ever since grade 9.When I first decided to change my look. I became a slut. That's all I would ever be worth to the world. I knew I couldn't change. The only guy that I truly ever cared for, loved, trusted, told me the truth. The truth I was finally able to accept it.
I sat down on the couch.
"Why? Fuck you Craig. Why do I still love you?" I began to cry. Tears were running down my cheeks as I curled up in a ball and began to cry so hard my throat began to burn. My body began shaking. "Why? Why? Why am I so fucked up?" Why does the world hate me. All I ever wanted to do was to better myself. yet every time I tried to change and be normal I always fuck up and do something stupid. I began to cry even louder ."God! Just kill me already! Why don't you? Do you want your laugh? Huh? Is that what you want!"
I stood up and began to scream into my pillow. When I screamed it gave me this suffocation high. I opened my mouth but no air went to it .I felt like I was going to die. But then I easily picked up my head and gasped for air. The high was gone. I did this about five or six more times. Until I became numb. I felt nothing. Nothing at all. My eyes were gooeyish .I stood up. As I began to walk towards the bathroom I looked around. I saw that Craig did indeed leave his drugs on the floor. Hurray I immediately thought. I needed something to help escape this insanity. Bending down to get the little baggie I noticed that there was actually quite a bit left. I grabbed the hand mirror from the bathroom drawer, along with the blade, and went over to the table. The crystal had to be cut super fine. I cut and cut. Almost obsessively for about 5-10 minutes. The crystal was perfect. Like powder. I made 3 really fat lines. No straw was around so I had to practically put my face flat against the table. Shit, the crystal felt incredible burning its way through my nasal passage up to my brain. So strong, so strong. The drip wasn't bad. Actually the drip has always been my favorite part. It was so strong I felt it instantly. I sat back in my chair. I felt something wet on my lip. A runny nose more than likely. I reached my hand up to wipe it away but when I drew it back I noticed that there was blood on my hands. My nose was bleeding.
"Shit" I said looking at it. I wiped my nose clean with my shirt.
"I'm so fucking pathetic." I continued looking at the shirt. What am I gonna do. I have no money and the class leaves in 2 days. What the fuck am I gonna do. My boyfriend left me, I have no fuckin family, I thought. I was really started to feel super high. My life is so fucked up and no one loves me. There really is no reason to go on living. I noticed the blade just lying on the table. I started getting teary eyed. Not really crying just my eyes were really watery. I wanted to do a couple more lines. I snorted 2 more lines. Just as fat as the first 3. Some tears fell down. I was about to end my life. There was nothing left. I laid my arm on the table. Rolling up my sleeve exposed the scars that were there from previous times. Although I have cut myself plenty times before, for some reason I was scared this time. I have no idea why. I placed the blade against my skin. I didn't push it in right away. I just sat there. For some reason I couldn't bare to look. I turned my head to the side and closed my eyes. I pushed the blade in and dragged it across my skin.
"Ugh" I hissed as I squinted my eyes from the pain. It hurt like a bitch. That was the deepest that I have ever cut. I finally turned my head back and took a look at my arm. It was bleeding but I didn't cut deep enough.
"Fuck" I slightly yelled, "I'm so stupid, I can't even kill myself right".
I got up and walked over to the bed to have a seat. I sat next to the lamp so I could have better lighting. I was gonna try this one more time. I placed my arm down. As I brought the blade to my arm I noticed Luke's card. I picked up the card to get a better look at it with one hand as I dried my tears with the other. That was so immature for me to freak out like that. Prostitution can't be that bad. Seeing how big of a slut I am and how I'm gonna have sex anyway, I might as well get paid for it. I wish I had gotten paid all those times before, I thought. I mean I'm sure I could make so much money. I picked up my cell phone. I had no idea what I was doing. A minute ago I was trying to kill myself now I want to be a prostitute. Shit I'm so fucked up, I thought, Hopefully he wont notice. I dialed his number. I was feeling a little anxious. He answered on the 2nd ring.
"Hello" he said.
"Hi. Luke, this is Manny." I said. I was pretty confident that I didn't sound as high as I really was.
"And?" He said like he could care less. I was really starting to feel dumb.
"Yea, umm. I'm sorry for the way I overreacted the other night. Really. That was childish and stupid."
He didn't say anything.
"Well… don't be sorry." He responded. I'm surprised he didn't hang up on me. "Your reaction was natural. I should have prepared you."
"I still shouldn't have freaked out." I continued.
"Don't worry about it. No harm done."
It was silent again.
"So Manny, what's going on with you? You find a job yet?" He said as if nothing happened. It's cool that he can just forget things easy as that.
"No. That's actually what I'm calling about. Besides the apology. I was hoping maybe you could tell me more about, ya know, the business."
"Sure. We should have dinner or something. Cool?"
"O.K."
"Well uh, 8:30 good for you?"
"Yea."
"I'll pick you up. You still at the Hilton?"
"Yea."
"Well see you then."
"Bye. Oh and Luke." I said last minute hoping that he wouldn't hang up.
"Yes?" he answered.
"Thanks."
"No problem Angel." He concluded and then hung up.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------As I walked in my room I was mad as hell and just wanted to get high so I could try and foregt this ridiculous bullshit. Everyone was there.
"You were gone awhile, where's Manny?" Jimmy asked.
"Oh yea., Jimmy told me you guys saw her. How is she?" Marco asked as happy as he could be.
"Fuck Manny." I spat, "Is Kate around?" I asked. They all were shocked to hear mespeak that way about her.
"Uh no man. I haven't seen her." Jimmy answered. I walked into my bedroom, closed the door and dialed Kate.
"Craig, hi." Kate answered in the happy sarcastic mood that she always seemed to be in.
"Kate, I need to see you."
"Awww." Kate laughed. She canbe so annoying.
"Kate,"
"I would love to see you but I'm in San Fran right now."
"Great. Just fuckin perfect. I said anxiously. Kate heard the frustration in my voice.
"Miss me that much?" Kate sarcastically said.
"Hell no. I just need to get high."
"I know a guy who has a lab. You think you could go there?" She asked me.
"Yea."
Kate gave me his number and told me to make sure that I tell him that I got the number from her or else he wouldn't deal to me. I called him. He asked for the amount I wanted and he gave me the price. I left room and was my way.
"We have a show tonight." Ellie yelled as the door was slamming. I took a cab to his house. wasn't that far. The guy was nice and gave me a little extra if I said I would do business with him again. I caught a cab and got off at a random place. There was an alley. I walked in, took out my bag of cryst and snorted a good amount. It was killer. Incredible high. I left the alley and started walking. Where, I don't know. All I could think about was Manny and how fucked up everything was. I'm as sad as I am angry. I lover her so much. What a slut. She cant even keep her legs closed. I just don't understand. I mean she had to have felt my love for her. How could she have let another guy fuck her? I feel like I'm going crazy. I'm suppose to be here living my dream but it's the last place I want to be. Everything is all fucked up because of that bitch. My cell phone started ringing. It was Marco. I put the phone on silent. I took a seat on the side of a building and observed the rest of the world from a high ass point of view. Everybody seemed to be rushing. It was weird. I sat at this spot for awhile. It was time to get up when people started throwing money at me. I walked more. For hours, every hour darting around a corner to get another bump. The show I had tonight was long over. Oh well, who gives a shit. I sure as fuck don't. I decided to go ahead and go home. When I walked in, "Whoa". All I have to say is, if looks could kill.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was about 8:20. I had actually gotten dressed rather quickly. I was simple but sexy, wearing very low, very tight, grey pants and a man type vest that was made to fit a girl. It showed a lot of cleave. I wore stilettos with it. I had completely forgotten that I was not to leave this room. I peaked my head out the door, looking right then left, no one was in the hallway. I went all the way down the hall to take the stairs instead of the elevators. When I got to the stairs that led to the lobby, I went out the employees only exit. I was outside in the back of the hotel. I walked around to the front. Luke's car was there as expected. He saw me walking up to his car. My pace started off fast but I slowed down. I got a little nervous. I didn't know what to say or how to act. Things were obviously going to be awkward between us. When I reached for the door handle the door wouldn't open. He had to unlock it. He did and I got in.
"Good evening." Luke said in the mature, sexy, sly tone that he always seemed to speak in, "You look nice."
"Thanks so do you." I responded nervously. I tried to think of something else to say but my mind was completely blank. Luke did a lot of smiling and a lot of unexplainable looks at me. I didn't know how to react. I didn't know if he was just being his mysterious self or if he was laughing at me. We had been driving silently for like 10 minutes. I felt like I had to say something.
"Luke I-" I began.
"Manny," he interrupted as he turned his head to face me, "Let's, just, pretend that the other night never happened. O.k." He said reassuringly.
I sighed a happy sigh. A sigh of relief, "O.k." I smiled.
"Great." He smiled. "So, how you been since the last time I saw you. Honestly, sweetie?"
"Horrible. My boyfriend dropped me. Hard, on my ass." I expressed.
"He broke up with you? Well what did you do?" Luke asked.
"I was a horrible girlfriend. He had every right to." I responded in a sad tone. I didn't realize how depressing I sounded.
"Baby forget him. I'll teach how to get any guy you want with just one look." He smiled and winked at me. I gave a fake smile back. The whole forget him thing hit me the wrong way I guess. We continued with small talk. We were at the restaurant before I knew it. He chose to go through the valet. The valet driver opened my door for me.
"Thanks." I told him.
He walked around to the drivers side and took Luke's keys. In return he gave Luke the ticket. Luke walked over to me and grabbed my hand. We proceeded into the restaurant.
"You want a table or a booth?" He asked me looking around.
"Ummm," I smiled, "A booth"
"O.k."
The hostess came over to us.
"Hello. How you are you this evening?"
"Fine and yourself?" Luke responded.
"I'm fine thank you. Sir would you like a booth or a table?"
"Booth please."
"Smoking or non?"
"Smoking."
"O.k. right this way." The hostess concluded. She led us to our seats.
"Thanks."
"Someone will be right with you." She said then walked away.
Luke put out his hand for me to sit down first. I did. Instead of sitting across from me he sat next to me. That was different. He rested his arm on the seat. It wasn't around me it was just behind me and I was sitting there. I leaned back for better comfort. The waiter came over.
"Can I start you guys off with anything to drink?" He asked.
"Manny," Luke said looking at me to tell the waiter what I wanted. I just kind of smiled stupidly. I was still so nervous, I don't know why. Luke had a small giggle.
"Yes. Let me get an apple martini for her and a vodka cranberry." Luke ordered.
"I'll have that out in a moment."
The waiter walked away.
"What if I don't like apple martinis?" I playfully said.
"No what if's needed. I know you do." He winked and made a click noise with his mouth. I really did like apple martinis. How he knew, I have no idea. The waiter brought us our drinks. I wanted to loosen up a little so I drank like half of it right away.
"Take it easy." Luke said looking at me.
I smiled, "It's o.k. I can handle it." I took my drink and drank the rest of it.
"You want another?" He asked already motioning for a waiter.
"Please."
"Let me get another apple martini." Luke ordered.
The waiter brought it over right away and also took our order. I got a salad. I was starving and should've gotten more but I didn't want to seem like a cow. Luke had fish. The wait wasn't long. Of course Luke ordered more drinks. I was already buzzin after the first 2, but I couldn't come off as a light weight. The bartender was making them strong. They are suppose to be a really pretty bright green color but they were almost completely clear. I swear he was using like 97 vodka and 3 apple mix. I ate about half my salad. Luke ate all of his meal. I wanted a cigarette. As much as I hated I started to get a little giggly. When I tried to light my cig I wasn't very successful.
"Why don't you let me get that." Luke said as he took my lighter and lit for me.
"Thank you, Luke." I said with a lot of emphasis on Luke.
"No prob."
He had a cigarette as well.
I exhaled smoke. "What do you wanna do now?"
"You wanna go to my apartment?"
"Yea." I smiled.
After paying the check, Luke got up and I followed. I felt the liquor big time when I stood up.
"Have a good night" The hostess said to us as we were walking out the door. We went outside and waited for the valet driver to bring the car around. He did and we were on our way. Luke lived pretty close to the restaurant. We were there almost instantly it seems. While going inside I noticed there was no doorman this time. On the way up we didn't say anything. Luke opened the door and his apartment looked so different. I guess because there wasn't 100 people inside.
"Wow. Your apartment is amazing." I said looking around.
"Thanks." Luke said as he threw his keys on the table. My walking around led me to his bar. Luke noticed.
"Help yourself…I'm gonna have some." He said with a smile. His beautiful smile. I did help myself. I helped myself plenty and 30 minutes later I was so so so drunk. Luke did a lot of drinking but I don't think he was nearly as drunk as I was. Luke walked into his bedroom but stopped to look back at me as if he wanted me to follow. I stumbled slightly to get there. His room was perfect. The bed was huge, one of the wall's was a big mirror, he had a bowl full of condoms on his dresser, just so many peculiar things. He went and sat on the bed. I sat in a chair with my, umm, I don't even know what number drink it was.
"That's uh, a nice big bed ya got there." I said doing the whole nod/ blinking thing that drunk people do at some point of their intoxication.
"Yea. I like a big bed." He answered.
"I'm sure…So, Luke, we never talked about me being a, a, a hoe." I smirked. I sat all the way back in the chair.
"Well, you know Manny I don't know." He said in a puzzling way.
"You don't know what?"
"I don't know if you could handle it, if you have what it takes. And," He had a small laugh, "We both know that you're nowhere near sexy enough."
I was insulted. Is he serious?
"Ugh" My eyes got wide.
"Don't get offended. You see Manny, a great prostitute is a girl that could stop a man dead in his tracks with just one look. A girl who can make a guy want to do anything, max out his credit card just to have her, pay any price and like I said, you're not sexy enough. Simple as that." He said just as calm as if what he said wasn't a downer.
"Ugh, please. I'm like," I paused trying to think of something to say, "The sex queen. I could out-fuck any bitch." I continued, getting a little ghetto. The alcohol does that to me sometimes.
Luke had a laugh. Not the "You're stupid" kind of laugh but the "O.k. prove it" Kind of laugh.
"You can?" He asked.
"Most, defiantly." I said with so much confidence. More like liquid confidence.
"Well then. Come show me what ya got." Luke said inviting me to his bed. I smiled.
I downed the rest of my drink then stood up out of my chair. I walked over to the bowl of condoms, picked up one, and walked over to him. He was still sitting. I quickly took off my clothes only leaving my bra on. I unbuttoned his pants and pulled them down a little. He sat up so I could. His dick was hard and a pretty nice size. He had no hair. Completely shaved which I thought was sexy as hell. I got on my knees and ripped the condom package opened with my teeth. I put the condom in my mouth and proceeded to put the condom on his dick. I rolled it all the way down with my tongue. He took his shirt off. I pushed him down and climbed on top of him sitting right on his dick. I began to grind back in forth, occasionally leaning down to kiss his chest and neck and such. He was squeezing my ass and thighs but moved up to my boobs. He squeezed the shit out of them. My hair was in my face, so when I through it back I got a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Shit, I had no idea how sexy I was. Like I looked so good fucking this guy. Wow. I would look at Luke but I couldn't help but look at myself. I was just riding him. I stopped looking because I got an obvious distraction. It started to feel really good. Amazing. He look to be enjoying it to.
"Manny," Luke began, "I got to give it up girl, you're good."
"I know." I breathed lustfully.
Luke rolled me over so that he was on top. He started going really fast which felt fantastic. He was breathing rapidly and I was making the typical bimbo, slutty sex noises. I couldn't help it. Shit, I had the best orgasm. Like whoa. It felt so good that for a second I thought that I was going to have to make him stop. He came as well. He got off and laid down next to me. He reached over me to get us both some cigarettes. Cigarettes after sex, how cliché. We were facing each other. I leaned my head on my fist.
"So, you like?" I smiled. He laughed.
"I like." Luke nodded.
"Ha. Told you." I said exhaling smoke in his face in a playful way.. I was still very drunk and was about to drop any minute. I kind of laid my head down. I guess Luke assumed that I passed out. He took the cig out of my hand and covered me up. What a kind gesture. I was knocked out soon after. I slept for a while. When I awoke I was in bed alone. I wondered if he had left. I got up and put my clothes on. I couldn't find my panties though. Oh well. I use to go to panty-less all the time. When I walked outside his bedroom I smelled something cooking. I walked in the kitchen.
"Good morning." Luke said in some pajama pants and a tank. His hair was wet. I'm guessing he had just gotten out of the shower recently.
"Morning." I responded.
"Are you hungry?" He asked turning around with spatula in hand.
"Yes, I am."
"Have a seat." He told me. I did. The table was already set. Luke came over and took my plate. When he brought it over there was French toast and half a grapefruit on it. There was actually a sprig of mint on there as garnish. Wow, how restaurant-ish.
"This looks great. Thank you."
He sat down at the table right across form me without any.
"You're not having any?" I asked.
"Nah. I'm not hungry."
Wow I guess he made this just for me. I started eating. It was weird that he was just watching me eat.
"Do you want some juice?"
"Yes, please."
He got up to bring me juice. He bought it in a wine glass. That was different. He handed it to me.
"Thank you."
"Manny we should probably talk seriously, o.k." He said sitting back down.
I put my fork down. I was pretty much done anyway.
"O.k."
"What exactly are your plans?"
His question was so straight forward.
"I guess , to work for you." I said sounding very unsure.
"Manny there is no guessing in this. You have to be absolutely sure this is what you want to do. Maybe you should think about it a little longer."
He got up and was about to walk away. I stopped him by touching his arm.
"No." I responded making eye contact, "I don't have to. I'm sure."
I think I'm sure anyways.
"O.k. well, you'll stay here. We should probably go and get your stuff A.S.A.P."
"You're right." I agreed.
"I'll be back out in a minute. I'm going to change then we will leave." he went into his bedroom. I was still a little sleepy. Luke came out soon as expected.
"Are you ready to go?" He asked grabbing his sun glasses. I nodded. We headed downstairs. No doorman again. It was like late afternoon and a beautiful day. Bright and sunny. We headed to my hotel. We were there in about 20 minutes. He parked.
"Do you want me to go up with you?" Luke asked.
"No. I don't want to draw any attention to myself." I answered. I took off my seatbelt.
"O.k. well I'll be here waiting."
"O.k."
I got out and walked around the back again to the employee entrance. No one saw me go in. I started going up the stairs to the 6th floor. It started off o.k. but by the time I got to like the 3rd floor it wasn't so easy. Gah, I'd never realized how out of shape I was before. It almost killed me but I made it. There were some people in the hallway but they weren't Degrassi people. I got to my room unnoticed. My room was a little messy. There was shit everywhere. I didn't want to be up there long I just threw everything I had in a bag. Even the clothes that Craig left there. I don't know why, I just wanted them. I went over to the table and got all of my jewelry and noticed the crystal. I scooped that up in the little baggie and continued with what I was doing. The whole thing took like 10-15 minutes. I looked around to make sure that I had everything. I did. All of my stuff was so heavy and I wasn't about to haul all that shit downstairs. If people see me they see me. I decided to take the elevator. I left my room key in the key slot. The elevator took forever to come but it finally did. When I got to the lobby I hesitated. I looked around to make sure no one I knew was down there. I didn't see anybody. I continued on. A bellboy was nice enough to help me with my stuff. Thank God. He carried it out to Luke's car.
"Thanks a lot." I said to him.
"No problem. Just doing my job ma'am."
Luke saw us coming his way and got out to open the trunk. The bellboy placed the things inside.
"Is that all?" He asked.
"Yes."
Luke went back to get in the car. The bellboy closed the trunk and went to open my door for me. As I was walking that way I noticed J.T. in the lobby. I stopped walking. He was just staring at me and I stared back. I felt like running up to him hugging him. He was always such a good friend to me.
The bellboy cleared his throat loudly, "Ma'am". It got my attention.
"Oh sorry." I took one more look at J.T. then got in the car.
"That didn't take long." Luke said to me as he put his car in drive. I smiled. I didn't know what else to do. What I was feeling was just a little overwhelming. There was no turning back. I was on my own now. Can I really do this, I thought. We were back at his apartment shortly. Luke carried all of my stuff up for me. He put them in his bedroom. I guess I will be sleeping with him.
"I have a few errands to run. Will you be o.k.?" Luke asked.
"Yea. Thanks again Luke, for everything." I thanked.
"My pleasure. Do you need anything?"
"No thank you."
"O.k. well see you later."
"Bye."
Luke then left. I was alone. I was going to unpack my stuff but I didn't know where to put it so I decided not to. It was so awkward here. Completely silent. I wasn't really bored. I just didn't know what to do. I wonder how long Luke is going to be gone. I walked into the living room and had a seat in this huge comfortable looking chair. When I sat down it like swallowed me. My mind was racing. I guess that was a good thing, to keep myself distracted from one of the bigger issues. I couldn't help it. I started thinking about Craig. I was still in such disbelief that the whole thing happened. I wonder if he would ever even talk to me again. It was a little depressing knowing that we could possibly never talk again and that some of his last words to me was calling me horrible names. I almost started crying. I could feel it erupting inside me. I didn't want to cry. Crying never solves anything. I'm all cried out. I laid my head back and closed my eyes. I didn't intend on going to sleep but I did.
"Manny." Luke said with his hand on my hip, "Manny, wake up." He continued. I turned to look at him.
"Had yourself a nap?" He asked.
"Yea, sorry." I said as I sat up a little more.
"No, its o.k. Don't be sorry." He sat on the arm of the chair.
"You up for a club tonight?" He asked.
"Yea. But, I don't have any I.D."
"Don't worry about that. You will be with me." He smiled, tapped my thigh and got up.
"What kind of club is it? Like what kind of people will be there?" I asked him. I so was not in the mood for any hatin bitches.
"Trust me. You'll like it." He answered.
"When are you leaving?" I asked him. He was eating olives.
"As soon as you're ready" He said smiling. I laughed.
"O.k. I'll try to hurry" I said getting up and heading to his bedroom.
"Take your time."
I went in there and my bags were no longer on the floor. I guess Luke heard the silence.
"Oh I put your stuff in the closet and some in the drawers." He yelled.
"Thank you." I responded. That was nice of him. I hope he didn't see the crystal. I had no idea what I was going to wear. Everything I had looked so eww. I just went with a pink halter top with a short ripped skirt and some cute matching pink high heels. Once that was taken care of I went and took a quick shower. I didn't want to take a long time so I skipped over things that I would usually do but I couldn't skip on my hair. I wanted it in a straight ponytail. The blow-drying took forever as expected but it was worth it. I took one more look in the mirror and stepped out. Luke was on the phone.
"Let me call you back." He said to the person on the phone.
"Manny, you are so consistent."
I blushed, "Thank you. You are as well."
"I have to be." He said, "You ready."
I nodded. He walked over to the door and held it open for me. We headed towards the elevator and went down. His car was parked close. Like the gentleman he is, Luke opened the door for me.
"Thank you." I said to him. I find myself saying thank you a lot around him.
"No need to thank me."
We were on our way to the club. We didn't say much. When we got there we parked down the street from the club and had to walk. The name of the club was called Synn. Luke grabbed my hand.
"Synn. That's an interesting name for a club." I commented.
"I agree." Luke responded. We continued walking up until we got to the entrance. There was a line but me and Luke went right up to the door.
"Delio, what's up?" The doorman said to him as he unlocked the velvet rope.
"Nothing so far, how is it in there?"
"Like always."
"Great. Well uh, see ya inside." Luke concluded and we walked in.
"Delio?" I questioned.
"My last name." He answered.
"Ohhhh." I nodded. The club was huge. There were so many people. Luke held my hand tightly as he leaded the way to the bar through all the people. We made it there.
"Let me get two vodka tonics." Luke said loudly to the bartender. The bartender made them right away.
"Thanks." Luke told him. He handed one of the drinks to me. I took a sip of it and of course it was pretty strong. When I went to take another Luke tilted the cup so that I would drink it all.
"You want another one?" Luke asked me already getting the bartenders attention.
"Maybe later." I suggested.
Luke turned and looked at me, "I insist." He turned back to the bartender, "Let me get another one."
The bartender gave him the drink.
"Thanks." Luke thanked him. He reached inside his pocket and pulled out a little pill and gave it to me.
"What is it?" I asked him. I didn't recognize it at all.
"Here" He began completely ignoring my question, "Take it with this drink."
He handed me the drink. I was a little hesitant but I didn't want to seem like a baby so I took it. I only drank enough to swallow the pill and brought the drink back down.
"Ah-ah. Drink it all." Luke said slightly shaking his finger at me. I finished it.
"Good girl. C'mon." Luke grabbed my hand and we headed towards a table. There were tons of people there. Hopefully they wont try the bullshit that last guy did.
"You guys I want you to meet Manny." Luke said putting me in front of him.
I smiled a sweet smile, "Hello." Most of them just nodded or put up their hand but a couple of them said hi. Girls and guys. Someone got up so that me and Luke could sit down in the circular booth. The guy that got up went first, then me, and Luke sat on the outside. It was a little uncomfortable but I didn't mind. I felt a tiny, like microscopic buzz from the drinks, but nothing to big. They all started engaging in various conversations. Some sounded interesting and some I couldn't even begin to follow. Luke turned my way every now and then to ask me if I was o.k. I did start to feel a little giggly and as if I needed to say something so I started commenting on some of the statements being made. My shyness is completely gone now. I scooted really close to Luke. He noticed. He turned to look at me and put his hand on my thigh under the table.
"How you feelin?" He asked in my ear.
"Faaaaaaabulous" I expressed in a very happy tone.
He leaned down once more to whisper something again "Good" He whispered biting my earlobe before he pulled away. The guy sitting in the other side of me got my attention.
"Manny you from here?" He asked. He was cute. He had kind of a shady look though.
"No, I'm from Canada." I answered. I could barely hear him.
"Why are you here?" He asked getting just a little bit closer so that I could hear him. For some reason I panicked. I didn't know how to answer him. The truth just seemed so, so, so like something I don't need to share with a lot of people.
"Fuck!" I said changing the subject, "I love this song."
When I sat up a little to get ready to stand I felt the pill or the drink or whatever it was like whoa. I sat back down. I felt amazing. Not to mention like super sexy. I felt like none of those hoes had shit on me. Bow down bitches.
"You alright?" The guy asked me with a smile. I smiled back. Turning his direction, I put one leg on the other side of him which put me in the position of straddling him.
I leaned down to his ear, "Oh yea."
I wasn't gonna stay there I just needed to get by. I brought my other leg to the other side and was now over him. I started dancing in front of him. I didn't care who was watching. He seemed to have been enjoying it. I reached my hands out to grab his so he could dance with me. He didn't do much dancing. It was more groping. I kind of got into it and started kissing him. He turned me around so that my back was to him and I instantly made eye contact with Luke back at the table. I had trouble reading his expression. He was just looking at me while smoking a cig. For some reason I felt like I needed to stop what I was doing. As if he wouldn't approve. I pulled away from the guy and went to go sit back down. I felt like a kid in trouble or something. Luke didn't say anything at first.
"Cigarette?" Luke offered handing me one. I accepted.
"Uh yea. Thanks."
He took out his lighter and lit it for me. After he looked towards the direction of his friends. I finished my cigarette. He still had not talked to me. Like 15 minutes went by and he still had not spoken a word to me. He was just laughing and talking with his friends. The feeling of stupidity was overwhelming. And the "whatever it was" started kicking in even more.
"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." I said to Luke but he didn't pay me any attention. I got up and headed towards the bathroom. I managed to make it there without falling or tripping over something. Surprisingly there weren't that many girls in there. I went in an empty stall and leaned against the wall. I tried to fight it but I couldn't help it. I felt so giggly. I started laughing for no apparent reason. I was sliding down the wall about to drop at any second. I heard someone come in. Who ever it was came into the stall that I was in. It was Luke. He had a smile.
"What are you doing in here?" He laughed as he helped me back up.
"Umm, I, don't know actually."
He opened the door and both of us left the stall.
"You think your about ready to go?" Luke asked. I nodded. We headed out of the bathroom and back over to the table where his friends were.
"I'll see you guys later." Luke told them all.
"Later man." one of the guys said. It was the guy I was dancing with. He waved bye to me. I smiled. There weren't very many people outside when we walked outside the club. It was a little eerie. Luke noticed me looking around.
"You scared?" Luke asked me as he got his keys out to open my door.
I smirked, "Yes."
"Well don't be." he said in a reassuringly way. I got in. As did he. We went back to his apartment. I still was very drunk or whatever. Luke had to help me get out of the car.
"Thank you." I said as I got out.
"No problem sexy." He shut the door and we headed to his apartment. "You looked so hot tonight dancing like that."
Wow. I thought that he thought it was gross or something.
"You thought so? I thought you were grossed out?"
"Not at all."
We made it up the elevator. When we walked inside there was this really pretty girl inside. She was tall and skinny. Had long straight hair. She had really sad eyes though. She was sitting but stood up when we walked inside. She gave us a fake smile. Not one of those bitchy smiles that you give someone when you are mad. It seemed as if she was like sad about something or worn out but forced out a smile anyway.
"Luke, hi." Her soft voice said.
"Cherish." Luke said in monotone. I can't believe her name is Cherish. That's so awesome. Luke locked the door.
"Hi. I'm Manny." I said sounding very silly and happy-headed. She gave another half smile.
"Manny why don't you go to my room." Luke said not looking at me but at Cherish.
"O.k." I turned to Cherish, "It was nice meeting you Cherish."
"Same." She responded. I went to his bedroom and started changing. I'm assuming that girl was a prostitute, I thought to myself. She was so pretty. I wonder if they all look like that. I could never compete with them. When I walked in I left the door cracked. I could hear Luke saying something but I couldn't make it out. I went over to peek out the door. Cherish was on her knees on the ground whimpering and Luke was walking around her. I wonder how she got down there. I would hope Luke didn't push her down there. Luke then threw money at her. I opened the door a little more and it squeaked. Both Luke and Cherish noticed. They both looked at me. I felt so dumb. Luke came over to me.
"You're tired." Luke said. I didn't know if he was asking me or telling me. I was anyways though.
"Yea." I responded.
"Well goodnight sweetie." Luke said then leaned down to kiss me on the cheek goodnight.
"Goodnight."
He left and shut the door completely. I walked over to his bed and got in. I didn't know what to think, so, I didn't. I just went to sleep.
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Over the last 2 and a half weeks me and the band were on some serious rocky terms. Most of it, o.k. all of it was my fault. Ellie and Marco stayed up each others asses and every now and then me and Jimmy would have a drink together. I became pretty good with the lab guy that Kate told me about and that led to getting high more often. I missed shows all the time and when we would go to shows sometimes we would get boo-ed because of my shitty vocals. I would forget lyrics and everything. An absolute disgrace. Today we have some lame press conference and James is here drilling us on what to say. I'm beginning to hate this.
"You guys are really fucking up. I'm this close to dropping you." James expressed angrily, "And you," James spoke to me. I turned my head away from him.
"Hey, wise ass, listen up. I've had just about enough of your shit." He continued.
"Yea whatever. Can we hurry this up so we can get this over with." I responded trying to move along. Ellie and Marco were sitting like robots not knowing what to say and Jimmy was on the phone.
"Yea whatever just don't fuck up." James said and left the room. There was a limo waiting outside. I hated limos. None of us really said anything to each other on the way there. We never talked about anything but we always miraculously became all smiles and hugs in front of all the spectators. I have never felt more like a phony. As soon as that was over we all went our separate ways as usual. We had a show the next day so we couldn't stay out long. I actually wanted to make this one so I wasn't gonna do anything that would take up too much time. I thought that maybe I would go chill with Sam then go back. Sam was always home. He never left the house it seems. But that was cool. When I got there he had a few new people there that I had never met. Mike and Jerry. They were nice. Sam was finishing up a fresh batch right as I was walking in. that was great. Since he had just made it he wasn't gonna charge me. He gave me some free which is always welcomed. We all did some and engaged in one of those supercharged energized conversations. The ones when you fidget the whole time and talk about the most boring things for hours only you're interested. We spoke of religion, politics, girls, everything. On crystal sometimes time goes by so fast. Hours felt like minutes. I didn't even realize that the sun had gone down.
"I have to feed the dog." Sam spoke, "I haven't fed him since like 5:00 and it's," he looked at his watch, "Almost 10:00."
I couldn't believe it.
"What! 10:00!" I shouted. I left without even saying goodbye. I knew James and everyone would be furious with me. I got to the apartment around 10:20. I could hear James yelling before I even walked in. I went and it was like they all wanted kill me.
"James, I'm so sorry." I tried to explain.
"I don't want to hear it. I'm done. I just got done telling your band mates that you guys were finished. I'm dropping you guys from the label." When James said this it was like the breaking of all things glass.
'Ah James, come on man. You gotta give me one more chance." I begged. I looked over at Ellie. She was crying.
"You had your chance pal." James said. He went for the door but stopped to say, "Kate will be getting in touch with about your payment." then left.
I felt horrible. I was responsible for ruining everything for my friends. I turned to look at Jimmy.
"Jimmy I-" I began.
"Save it." Jimmy said with hurt eyes, "Thanks a lot." he went back to his bedroom. I was there with Ellie and Marco. Marco had nothing to say and went on to do what he was going to do. Ellie walked up to me. She looked horrible.
"Loser." She said then walked away. I feel horrible.
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The last 3 weeks Luke and I basically went to parties and clubs every night. We got along fine. I met more of his friends. They all seemed nice. I saw Cherish every now and then and we would talk. She's a very nice girl. I thought about Craig sometimes but I normally drank to get my mind off of him. I do miss him a lot though. I always wonder how he is. I was out on the balcony watching the sunset like I did everyday. I loved it. Luke came out.
"I have lived here all my life and I have never gotten over how beautiful the sunset is." He said standing next to me.
"Oh I know it's gorgeous."
We both stood there for a couple minutes longer.
"Come inside. I have something for you."
I followed him in. We went into the living room. There was a white tube dress and shoes to match. Like porn star shoes.
"Are, those for me?" I asked him. I knew the answer. Luke was sitting on the arm of his sofa.
"Yes. Do you like it?"
"Yea, I umm, defiantly don't own anything like that." I said standing there.
"Great. I was hoping that you would. You will look great in it tonight." He said getting up and picking the dress up to look at it.
"What's happening tonight?" I asked curiously.
"You will be with your first client tonight." He said looking really happy. Like there was something special about that. I really didn't think he was actually gonna make me do it. It hasn't even been mentioned.
"What?" I asked him. I didn't know what else to say.
"Is there a problem?" He asked going from seeming happy to being really serious. I didn't answer right away. He walked closer to me.
"No. I just…never mind." I said giving him a fake smile.
"Good." Luke said.
"What time?" I asked.
"11:00"
I looked at the clock. It's like 7:45. That's like 3 hours away. Shit.
"O.k." I responded. Luke must have noticed how my attitude changed. He walked over and put his arm around me.
"Don't worry Manny. I know you will do fine." He said trying to sound reassuring. I had no response. He patted my back and then walked away. I went to sit down. I tried to think of other things. I told myself that prostitution is sexy and that it takes a real woman to be able to do something like that. The time was going by so quickly. When I was in school or doing something I wasn't to jazzed about the time would go by forever slow but now things are moving right along. Next thing I knew it was 9:30 and Luke was telling me to get ready. I went to take a shower. In the shower I thought of things that I could say to maybe get out of it but I stopped myself. I just needed to go ahead and deal with it. My shower was quick. I put on a white thong. All of this white was so foreign. I was so used to wearing black most of the time. I walked out to
grab a t-shirt to put on while I did my hair. I blew it straight and parted it directly down the middle. For make-up I had black eyeliner and shadow and some gloss. No jewelry. Accept earrings of course. I went back out to get dressed. Luke was standing out there that time. He didn't say anything. I grabbed the dress and put it on. It was a little tough. It was like 3 sizes to small. So tight and ever so short. The shoes were so tall. I almost fell when I put them on. I looked in the mirror and never in my life have I looked more like a skank. I mean my God. My ass cheeks were practically hanging out. I couldn't believe it. Luke came up behind me.
"Damn. You look great." He said smiling.
"Are you sure? I mean, you don't think it's a little much." I said turning to look at him.
"No it's perfect."
Of course he said that. It was 10:30. Me and Luke walked to the front room. I was speechless. I was just so scared. Luke reached inside his pocket.
"Here's the address." He said handing me a piece of paper.
"Oh my God. You're not coming?" I asked shocked.
"No." he said as if I was suppose to know that.
"Ugh. Luke" I really couldn't believe he was gonna send me alone.
"Manny c'mon now. Don't baby out on me alright. You're a big girl. You don't need me." He said to me sounding very inconsiderate. I looked down in disbelief.
He held my chin up. "You'll be fine. O.k. Honey."
I sighed. "O.k."
He kissed my forehead. "I'll be here when you get back and here is some money for a cab."
I took it and walked out the door.
"See you later." He said.
"Bye"
"Bye" I said and then he closed the door. I headed to the elevator and didn't have to wait. I went down and stood outside the building. I got a cab immediately. I'm not surprised considering what I was wearing.
"Could you take me here please." I said to the driver and showed him the card. He took off. The 20 minute ride seemed like a 5 minute ride.
"Thank you." I told the driver and handed him the money then got out. I was at a hotel. I was so scared. My heart was beating so fast. I want so badly just to get another cab and just leave. I walked inside and of course people looked at me. I'm sure it was obvious what I was doing there but that was the least of my worries. I was about to go have sex with a man I didn't even know. I looked at the card in the room I was to go to was on the 3rd floor. Room 301. I took the elevator and got there quickly. His room was at the very end of the hall. I could see it from where I was standing. I slowly started walking that way. No words could explain the way I feel. I raised my hand up to the door but hesitated before I knocked.
"You can do this." I told myself, then knocked.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
I heard someone coming to the door. It opened. I couldn't believe who it was.
"Well, well." The man said. It was that asshole that grabbed my ass at the party. I can't believe Luke would send me here knowing that this guy would be here. He stood there and stared at me. I was frozen.
"Come in sweetheart." He said as he moved so I could walk in. I walked in not knowing what to expect. He was acting as if we had never met kind of. He closed the door and walked over to the counter.
"You want a drink?" He asked me casually.
"No." I plainly said.
"Well I'm gonna have one."
There were 2 chairs with a table between them. I sat down in one and then he came over to sit in the other with drink in hand. He didn't say anything. He just sipped his drink. I sat back all the way.
"How have you been?" He asked smiling. He's so fuckin weird.
"Fine." I said immediately. I was being very short. I wanted to be done with this so I could get the fuck out of there.
"How you liking L.A. I hear your from Canada?"
"It's fine."
"Did.."
"Ugh." I sat up interrupting him, "Are we gonna chit chat or fuck." I wanted to be straight forward. Sal had a chuckle.
"What's the rush?" He laughed looking like a dumb ass.
"Fuck this shit." I said getting up and heading to the door. I could hear him coming my way. When I opened the door he slammed it shut. I looked at him.
"Move." I demanded. He didn't.
"Move mother fucker." I shouted.
All of a sudden I felt a slap to my face. It stung like hell.
"I've had enough of your mouth." He shouted obviously very angry. "Say another gah damn word bitch."
I don't know where the bad ass came from. I just couldn't stop myself. I moved my hair out of my face.
"Fuck, You."
BAM
He hit me again, slamming me to the ground. But punching me this time. I started crying instantly. It hurt so bad. I thought my jaw was broken but it wasn't because I was able to spit the blood out. Before I could refocus I was being yanked up and thrown onto the bed. The slam got me back to myself. He ripped my panties clean off. I was in shock. I couldn't believe something like this was happening again. I tried to slap his hands away but it wasn't doing anything. My crying was getting bad. It was affecting my breathing. He started laughing as he put his fingers inside me. I felt so violated. Where was the bad ass then I thought. He started to unbutton his pants. I just couldn't believe this. I was slapping and hitting at him but he just held my arms down. When his pants were down he shoved his dick in as hard as he could it seemed. I almost screamed it hurt so bad. He giggled.
"Take it whore." He said as he pushed in even deeper. The pain was so intense. Each thrust felt like a sharp knife.
"Please." I cried, "Stop."
"Shut the fuck up."
I sobbed even more. I didn't know how much longer this was going to last.
"Holy shit this is good." he began. "It's sliding in rather easily now. Are you bleeding or are you wet?" he said.
The thought that I could possibly be bleeding made me sick to my stomach. I felt like I was gonna puke right there.
"Stay right there baby I'm gonna blast on you?" He said smiling while looking at my teary face.
He pulled out his dick and came on my stomach. A lot got on my dress. He let all of his weight down on me. I tried to push him off but the fucker weighed like 200 lbs. He finally got off. When I got up I thought I was gonna fall right down. I hurt so bad. I pulled my dress down and ran out of there leaving the door open. Each step was brutal. I was in so much pain. I went down the hallway and pressed the elevator button. It wasn't coming fast enough. Oh I wish it would hurry. It finally came up. No one was in there. I went in and leaned against the wall. I couldn't stop crying. I felt so weak. When I went through the lobby I got even more stares than last time. The blood on my white dress must have looked horrific. I didn't have the courage to look up at anyone.
"Are you alright?" A random woman said stopping me. I didn't respond I just shoved past her. There were so many cars zooming by. I raised my hand to get a taxi. After about a minute I got one. The look he gave me was a surprised one.
"Do you need to go to the hospital?" The man asked me as I very slowly sat down and closed the door.
It took me a while to answer, "No. Could you take me to Château Oaks?"
"Sure."
He drove off. Every bump he went over was torture. I tried to brace myself better but that wasn't working. We finally got to the apartments. I passed the driver the cab fare.
"Don't worry about it sweetie." The man said.
"Thank you."
I got out and headed up. No one was around. Good. I made it to the apartment and walked in. Luke was on the phone when he saw me.
"Let me, call you back." He said into the phone when he saw me.
I quickly walked over and threw my arms around him. He hugged me back.
"Manny what's wrong?" he asked as he held me. I couldn't answer right away. I was able to get a hold of myself towards the end of the cab ride, but the emotions soon came back. I started crying hard again. I stood there with him for a couple of minutes. He gently pushed me away from him by my arms so that he could look at me.
"Calm down." He told me, "What happened?"
" (sniffle) That asshole from your party, Sal. He was a complete monster. (sniffle) God he was being so mean Luke." I cried. I worked my way back into his arms.
"Did you get the money?" He asked.
"No. I ran out of there the first chance I got."
"O.k." Luke nodded, " I'm sorry your first experience was a bad one. Really. But honey your just going to have to learn to take the good with the bad. They are paying for a service, that you provide, and if they want to get a little rough from time to time that's just going to have to be o.k."
I pulled away a little. Is he serious? I'm stunned. I can't believe he just said that.
"O.k." Is all I can think to say back. He wiped my tears away with his hand.
"Now. Why don't you go get yourself cleaned up." He told me.
I began to walk off to his bedroom.
"Oh, Manny, would you come back here for a second?" He asked casually.
I walked back over, "Yes?"
He walked really close to me. He then yanked my hair really hard and held on to it, "Don't ever fuckin come back here without my money again. Understood?"
Again I didn't answer right away. I didn't know what was happening.
He pulled my hair harder, "Understood?" He said wanting a response. I nodded and he let go. His attitude changed again and he gave me a kiss on my cheek.
"O.k. run along. I'll bring you some tea."
I stood there for a second and Luke walked away. He went over to his phone and began dialing somebody. I continued on to his bedroom. I shut the door behind me. What have I gotten myself into, I thought. I went in the bathroom and turned the shower on. It was a task trying to get that tight ass dress off. When I stepped into the shower the water was steaming hot. I stood right underneath the shower head. I could see the red water streaming down the bottom of the bath tub into the drain. I don't know if I am cut out for this kind of lifestyle. Being raped and beaten. Having sex with unknown men. I can't believe the life I have been cursed with. I'm all alone. I have nobody. After my painstaking shower I found a t-shirt and went straight to bed. I wanted to sleep. Forever. I fell asleep. Hours went by. I heard something which woke me up. It was Luke opening the blinds. He had placed a tray of food on the bed. The sun burned my eyes but they quickly adjusted.
"Did you sleep well?" He asked sitting next to me as I sat up.
"I guess so."
"Good. I'm glad. Are you hungry?"
I didn't say anything but he put the tray over my lap anyway. It was a fruit bowl and some orange juice. I picked up a cantaloupe and started nibbling on it.
"Again Manny, I'm sorry you had such a bad night. I wish things could have been better for you." He said in a very soothing tone. He seemed to be sincere.
I gave a faint smile, "Don't be sorry. It wasn't your fault." He smiled back. I started eating more. We were both quiet for a short moment.
"I have some errands to run. Care to join me?"
"Definitely not." I said wide eyed.
"Why not?" He asked.
"Look at me I look like shit."
"Manny you look beautiful. Get dressed."
I smiled a bit and finished eating so I could get ready. I didn't want him to wait long so I went for something simple, deciding on jeans and a little sexy shirt. I went to the front.
"Are you ready to go?"
I nodded. We left. We went several places. He got something for his car, got some towels, went to the grocery store, liquor store. A lot of places. I thought we were finally heading back.
"Do you mind if we stop by my friends house?" He asked me while driving.
"Not at all."
We headed there. We weren't driving long. This guy lived in a house. Luke started to get out. I stayed in.
"C'mon." He motioned to me.
"I'll stay here."
"Manny, get out." He said. I did and we walked up to the door. Luke knocked. A shirtless man holding a puppy came to the door. The guy was skinny and needed a shave. He looked as if he was cute at one time.
"Holy shit Luke. Well come in." The man said moving to the side so Luke and I could get by. I couldn't help but notice the mountain of coke on the table. It looked very appetizing.
"How you been man?" The man asked Luke.
"Swell." Luke replied. The man looked at me and smiled.
"Who is this pretty thing."
"Oh excuse my manners," Luke smiled, "This is Manny."
"Hi." I smiled extending my hand.
"Hello."
"That puppy is adorable. Can I hold him?" I asked wide eyed. I hope I didn't come off young.
"Sure darlin." The man answered handing me the puppy. I went and sat down and Luke and the guy sat on the couch to have man talk or whatever it is they were doing. I couldn't keep my eyes off that coke. I wanted it so badly. I tried to play with the puppy but found my eyes back on the coke. I guess the man noticed me. When I saw him notice me I went back to the puppy hoping nothing would be said.
"Oh honey, I'm sorry, help yourself." The man said interrupting Luke. Luke turned around to look at me.
"Oh no, no, I'm fine." I tried to tell him even though I wanted some.
"I insist." The man kept going.
"No really I'm fine."
"It's the shit." The man tried once more. I looked over at Luke and he nodded giving me his approval.
"O.k. Thank you." I finally gave in.
"Don't worry about it."
Him and Luke started talking again. I put the puppy down and scooted closer to the table. The coke was cut perfectly. I made two ample lines. There was no straw so I had to put my face really close to the table and snort it that way. It was incredible just as expected. The guys continued talking. The drip was pretty good. I felt the high. Wow. I could tell the guys were wrapping up. Luke stood up as did the guy.
"Come back soon Luke."
"I'll do that." Luke responded.
I stood up. "It was a pleasure meeting you." I happily said.
"It was great meeting you."
"You were right. The coke was wonderful."
"I told you. Why don't you take a some with you." He offered.
"Oh no. I couldn't." I told him hoping he would impose like he did last time. I really did want more. He didn't say anything. He went over to the table and put some in a baggie.
"Here." He smiled. How giving this guy is.
"Thank you." I said as I accepted the gift and giving him a half hug.
"We're gonna get out of here." Luke said.
"Alright see you tonight?"
Me and Luke left.
"He seemed nice." I said opening the car door and having a seat.
"Yea. I have known him awhile."
Luke backed out and we drove to his house. I keep finding myself wanting to say home but his house isn't my home. He's just letting me stay there. The sun was going down just as we arrived but we didn't go out to look like we normally do. Luke went straight to his bedroom. I was so antsy. I followed him. When I went inside he was laying down. He raised his head when he saw me.
"Oh sorry. I didn't know you were sleeping." I said turning around to leave.
"No. Come back." He said softly, "Lay with me."
"I'm wide awake." I told him.
"So. I wanna hold you."
I couldn't resist that. I went over and laid next to him. He put his arm over me. I guess it was comfortable. Neither one of us said anything for like 5 minutes.
"Luke, thanks for letting me stay here. I have no idea what I would have done."
He didn't respond.
"Luke." I said as I turned over to look at him. He had fallen asleep. I slowly eased myself out from under him and got up. He must be tired. He barely sleeps. I closed the door behind me. It was so quiet all the time. I never saw any other tenants. I had a seat on the recliner. I was a little bored. I had so much energy. Maybe I should go for a walk, I thought. I left the building and headed down the sidewalk, clueless to where I was going. I passed so many random people, but spoke to a lot of them. A lot of the homeless people. I was out for hours and didn't even realize it. Luke is probably awake and wondering where I am. I walked briskly back to the apartment. When I walked in Luke was already awake and accompanied by the ever so beautiful Cherish. She always looks amazing. She was wearing a very short skirt that showed her perfect thighs and this sexy long sleeve shirt that was very low cut. She reminded me of Roxy a little.
"Hi Manny." Cherish greeted as she started coming towards me. She gave me hug.
"Hi." I responded.
"What were you doing?" Luke asked not even looking at me, but he didn't sound mad.
"Nothing just went for a walk."
He just nodded.
"Well c'mon we're going to a party."
"I don't think I should." I said hoping that would be the end of it.
"Why the fuck not?" Luke asked me getting up. Oh my gah. I hope he's not about to get mad at me.
"I, ya know, my face." I answered as I touched my face.
"Not a problem. Cherish will do your make-up." He responded and then walked away.
"Yea. So hurry up go get dressed so I can get started." Cherish said with a bubbly attitude. I really didn't want to go but I didn't want to see what would happen if I didn't. After my shower I had no idea what to wear. My thighs looked like shit compared to Cherish's. I needed to wear pants. Black ones. For a top a decided on a really cute corset type thing. When I was taking my old clothes to the closet the coke fell out of my pocket. I figured I would need some so I went in the bathroom and laid me a couple lines. Cherish walked in right as I was about to.
"Ohhhhh. So I see you like to sniff." She said as she closed the door.
"Well, don't we all." We shared a cute giggle.
"Where did you get that?" She asked me.
"From some friend of Lukes."
"Well don't do that. Do this." She pulled out a vile that was inside her cleavage. When she unscrewed the cap there was a little coke spoon on it. She took a bump of it and then gave it to me. I scooped some up and had a bump. It was strong. Like whoa.
"Ugh, do more than that."
She laid a huge fat line on her hand and put it up to my face. I snorted that as well.
"Good girl. Now c'mon, lets do your make-up before Luke kills us for making him wait." Cherish smiled.
She began my make up. I didn't really feel anything yet, but by the time she was done it had hit me hard. I was sooo high. Me and Cherish walked out as happy as could be.
"Hellooooo." I said to Luke as I struck a pose in front him.
"You girls ready?"
"Yes yes yes." I answered.
"Doesn't Manny look extra gorgeous tonight Luke?" Cherish asked being silly.
"Just like always." Luke said as he flashed me a smile.
The three of us headed out the door and to his car. As we were getting in I headed for the back seat but Cherish pushed me down to sit in the front seat and then she sat down in my lap. That was different but comfortable. She weighed like nothing. On the way there they both talked on their cell phones the whole time. I lost my cell phone like a week ago. Sucks hella bad because its gonna have service as long as Craig keeps paying the bill. And he will because he combined our plans and when he pays his my bill is included. Oh well. After 20 minutes of chatter we got to our destination. It was a huge house.
"Who all is here?" Cherish asked.
"Everyone." Luke replied. We reached the door and went inside. This house seems like it was made for parties. It looked like a club. Cherish disappeared immediately. I stuck with Luke.
"Let me introduce you to some people." Luke said putting his hand around my waist.
"Introduce me to some sexy guys now that I know what the deal is."
We both laughed. He introduced me to several people. Some of them were drop dead. I mean yummy. We finally settled in a corner where Luke started talking with his friends. I wasn't bored at all. I was in the happiest mood ever. I saw Cherish coming our way.
"Can I have a dance my lady?" She asked with drink in hand.
"Thought you'd never ask."
We went to where everyone was dancing. I'm not one to brag but we really were the sexiest girls there. Cherish was dancing so provocatively. She was raising her skirt exposing her ass cheeks and everything. It didn't look slutty. It looked cool. I wanted to be like that. I turned it up as well. We look flawless and we were both super high. We noticed 2 guys staring at us. Cherish stopped dancing. She took my hand.
"C'mon." she said as we began walking over to them.
"You boys lookin at me and my bitch?"
"Is that a bad thing?" One of the guys asked.
"Not at all." I replied, "What's your names?"
"I'm Kenny and this is Blaine." One of the guys answered.
"Cherish."
"Manny."
"I've seen you before." One of the guys said to Cherish.
"Excuse us for a moment." Cherish said and pulled me back a little.
"Manny, you wanna work these guys? They got money." Cherish asked very eager.
"Well lets go get it." I smiled.
"Fuck yea." She smiled then gave me a kiss. We walked back over to them.
"Sooo," Cherish leaned in really close to them, "You guys want to go upstairs?"
"Lets go." One of them said. Cherish and Kenny headed that way first. I took Blaine's hand and followed. On our way up stairs I looked down and I could see Luke. I winked at him and he smiled. I proceeded into the bedroom and closed the door behind me. An hour later Cherish and I walked out loaded. She was right about those guys having money. They dropped some serious cash on the both of us. We were going back down the stairs.
"Not to bad for an hours work, eh?" Cherish said.
"I'd say." I smiled, "I think I can get use to this."
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Kate did get in touch with us like James said. The band was paid 100,000.00 dollars. Sooo much money. We didn't get all of it though. We had to pay the record label 60 thousand which only left 40 thousand and we had to split that 4 ways. I ended up with 10 thousand dollars. A thousand of it went to drugs and paying for my room. Which left me with 9 thousand. The others went back home while I stayed. I didn't want to face anybody. I hadn't spoken with anyone in forever. Joey called a few times. One day I got a call from a number I didn't recognize but it was a Canadian number. I answered.
"Hello." I spoke into the phone.
"Craig, hi. It's J.T."
Holy shit. No fucking way. I cant believe this piss ant is calling me. What the fuck could he possibly want.
"Yea." I responded. I didn't know what else to say.
"Have you seen Manny?" He asked strangely.
"No. Why would I have seen Manny? I'm still in California."
"Yea. Manny never came back."
"What do you mean Manny never came back?" I asked him. My heart started beating faster.
"She never came back home. She told me she was staying in California and no one has heard from her since. People think she's dead man."
Oh my God. I thought my heart was going to jump right out of my chest.
"Craig" J.T. said.
"I'm here. God, why would she want to stay here?"
"I guess she wanted to stay with you."
He's right. She probably did want to stay with me. She's been here all alone all this time. Anything could have happened to her.
"J.T. um, I appreciate you letting me know. Thanks." I thanked him. The beef I had with him was the last thing on my mind at that time.
"No problem. Just let me know if you hear anything."
"I will." I assured him.
"Bye."
"Bye." I hung up. My first thought was to call Manny but when I didn't I didn't get an answer. I don't blame her she probably hates me.
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I have been working as a prostitute for about a month now. Maybe a little less. It has not been easy at all. It has been the hardest thing I have ever done. Cherish makes it seems so easy. It has been nothing but hell for me. I always get set up with the biggest assholes. Always perverts that try to push my body to the limit. Sometimes I just don't know how much more I can take. Sometimes I cry, but then I think, what is that going to do. No longer am I Lukes little sweetheart. He treats me like shit now. One day I got robbed by a guy I had just had sex with and he took everything. I thought Luke was gonna kill me he was so furious. He beat me so bad I couldn't even leave the house for like 3 days. But of course I woke up to some lavish gift to make up for it. Luke only gave me enough drugs to keep me going. I never slept it seems. I dyed my hair a really sexy blood red 2 weeks ago. I was shocked that Luke let me get away with that. He actually liked it. Tonight I'm suppose to be going to meet some old married guys. I wonder what kind of perversions they are going to come up with this time.
"Fuck Manny hurry up." Luke yelled, "I'm not gonna be waiting on your ass all night."
I was in the bathroom doing some finishing touches. He was annoying the shit out of me but I dare not say a word. I was about to leave when I realized I didn't have a lighter for my cigarettes. I needed some matches. Luke usually kept some in a sock drawer somewhere. I went and opened it and didn't see any. I know they're somewhere. I reached my hand deep inside and felt something odd. When I looked at what it was it was my cell phone. Luke must have taken it. Why would he do that? I heard Luke coming so I fixed everything as fast as I could.
"What the fuck are you doing?" Luke asked after he walked in his room.
"Nothing."
"Well lets go. You were suppose to be there 30 minutes ago."
I made sure I had everything I needed like condoms and such and then left. Luke wasn't very talkative on the way there. All he had to say was for me not to fuck up because there was a lot of money to be made there. I was just ready to get there and get it over with so I could get back and find out why the fuck he would take my phone. Luke dropped me off and then left. He never stays. I guess because he doesn't want to feel guilty about anything. It's so scary knocking on a door and not knowing what to expect on the other side. The night ended up being a breeze. They were older men so they came like that. I got the money and was out of there. I took a cab back. Luckily Luke wasn't there. I rushed to his bedroom and got my phone charger out of my bag. I'm surprised that was still there. I got my phone and had to let it charge for like 10 minutes before I could even turn it on. When I did I was amazed. I didn't know it was even possible but I had 74 missed calls and messages. It never occurred to me that people might be wondering where I am. I did just disappear without telling anyone. I began checking them. The first one I heard was Emma. Oh my God Emma. She sounded horrible. I feel kind of bad just leaving her. But she was better off without me. I started skipping around because listening to Emma almost made me cry. There were some messages from J.T. but for some reason I didn't want to listen to those. I was on the last one and I couldn't believe it. My heart nearly stopped. It was Craig
"Manny. (sigh) I didn't think you would answer. I was right. I know things weren't golden last time we spoke. You must hate me. Just please, call me. Let me know you're o.k. I love you." The message said. My eyes started watering right away. Oh how I miss him. I want to call him back but what do I tell him? I can't tell him I've been living with some guy. I'm going to call him but I probably shouldn't call from here. If Luke caught me that would be it. I decided to go around the corner but I changed first. Something simple and fast. Just a t-shirt and jeans with a jacket. I was out of there. I went to a corner store. I was so nervous. We haven't spoken since he found out I was some huge skank and fucked another guy. That was like over a month ago. I sat all that thinking aside and just called. It rang once. Then twice. A third time. I thought for sure I was about to not get an answer. It was so late. Like 3:00 a.m.
"Manny." Craig picked up. I froze. It was so nice to hear him.
"Manny." Craig spoke again.
"I'm here." I responded. Craig made a sigh of relief.
"Oh my God Manny. Where are you?"
"I'm still in California. I didn't go back."
"Where have you been staying?" His voice was so, I don't know how to explain it. He sounds so concerned.
I knew he was going to ask me that. "Here and there."
"Are you o.k.?"
"I'm fine."
"Where are you? I want to see you."
Oh my God. I can't let him come here. That's suicide.
"I don't think that's a good idea." I told him. Like he was really gonna say o.k. bye.
"Manny. Where are you? I want to see you right now." Craig demanded.
"Craig I can't."
"Manny, I'm not playin with you. Tell me where you are."
He seems to really want to see me. I want to see him just as bad. I'm about to take a huge risk.
"(sigh) What hotel are you at? I'll come to you." I told him hoping that he would except that. He did.
"4 Seasons. Room 220."
"O.k. I'll leave now."
"O.k." He paused for a moment, "I'm so glad your o.k."
I didn't know what to say. I honestly thought that I would never see Craig again and for him to speak this way to me was a miracle. All I could say was "See you soon." then hung up. I hailed a cap and got one almost instantly.
"4 Seasons please." I told the cab driver. On the way there I was nervous and scared at the same time. Nervous about seeing Craig and scared that I might get caught. Since it was so late I was able to get there in no time.
"Thanks." I handed the driver the money. My heart was beating a million beats a second. I walked through the lobby and into the elevator. I was only in there for like 1 second since he was on the second floor. What am I gonna say to him. It took everything I had not to turn around. I reached room 220. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. He answered shirtless.
"Manny." Craig said grabbing me. He hugged me so tightly. I hugged back. I got a little teary eyed but I didn't start crying or anything. Craig's breathing got faster. Was he, oh my, I think he was about to cry. He pulled away to look at me then pulled me back.
"God. I don't know what I would have done if something had happened to you." Craig said softly, "I love you so much."
"I love you to." I told him. He pulled away again and closed the door. We both sat on the bed. We were kind of quiet.
"What have you been doing here all this time?" Craig asked me.
I wish I had prepared myself for the obvious questions.
"I've umm, just," I couldn't think of anything to say, "Nothing really."
"Where are you staying?"
"With a friend. She's really nice."
Craig again was silent.
"Don't you know people think you're dead? Why did you stay here? Why didn't you go back?"
I got up.
"I had nothing to go back to. I had nowhere to live and didn't have, never mind."
Craig got up and walked over to me.
"Didn't have what?"
"I didn't have you." I confessed. He pulled me into another hug and kissed my head.
"Well never again. I'm never gonna leave you again."
I started crying. There was no way that this whole situation was about to be that easy.
"What's wrong?" He asked concerned. I couldn't tell him the truth.
"I just missed you." I love him so much. "Craig I'm so sorry for everything. I wish I could go back."
"Manny don't worry about that. I don't care." He reassured me.
His phone rang but he ignored it. It rang again.
"Ugh," He sighed, "I gotta get the phone." He went and answered.
I went over and laid down in his bed for what I thought was going to be a second. I was so tired. When Craig got off the phone I was drifting asleep. Craig turned the light off and laid next to me.
"I love you." Craig said as he put his arm around me.
"I love you to."
Oh my God, no. I was waking up. I slept here. Me frantically getting up woke up Craig. I ran over to my cell phone. It read 11:30 a.m.
"Shit." I said kind of loudly with a cracky voice because I was about to cry. Not because I was about to have to leave Craig (although that saddened me) but because I had spent the night and I knew Luke was going to be furious. I hated being scared like this. Nothing has happened yet and all ready I'm shaking from the fear of what I'm going to get.
"What's the matter?" Craig asked as he got up.
"I have to go."
"Why are you so upset?" He asked. I really didn't want nor did I have time to get into this. I headed for the door but Craig stopped me.
"Craig, I don't have time for this o.k. So please just, move." I tried to tell him but he didn't care.
"No. Tell me what's going on."
"Look, it's none of your business."
"You are my business."
I started crying even harder. I really needed to go and Craig wasn't being very corporative.
"Craig please, just let me leave." I must have sound desperate.
Craig walked closer to me, "Oh my God. Manny what is wrong?"
I wanted to tell him so badly but he would for sure think I was the nastiest, dirtiest thing. I tried to dry up my tears but it wasn't working to well.
"Manny?" Craig spoke.
"(sigh) I fucked up. (pause) I really need to go."
"Well let me come with you. We could get your stuff and you can come back here."
"No. It's not that easy."
Craig's mood changed. It changed to a more emotional mood. He backed away and was quiet for a minute.
"Why are you keeping things from me?" Craig asked annoyed. I was speechless. I didn't know how to answer him.
"Jesus Manny please let me help you."
I really didn't think I was gonna be able to handle this. Could things be more fucked up? I felt like I was going to have a nervous break down or something.
"Craig, please, please, let me leave." I begged him. I could sense the frustration he was feeling. I felt horrible about doing this I just really didn't want to involve him.
"Fine." Craig said then opened the door for me. All I could do was walk out. I hated leaving like this. But what was I to do? I got a cab and headed back to Luke's. I was oblivious to everything that was going on around me. A plane could have crashed in front of me and I probably wouldn't have noticed. We got there quickly. Figures. It was noon now. I dreaded going up. I stepped out of the elevator and started the walk down the hallway and approached the door. My hands were shaking. Before walking in I turned my phone off and put it in my sock. Hopefully it will be o.k. there. I went in. I saw Cherish first thing and no sign of Luke. She motioned for me to leave.
"Go. Go." She whispered and waved her hand but it was to late. Luke came out. He smiled a bit. Not a welcoming smile. A sarcastic/frightening one. He was so calm with everything he did. That's why he was so scary. You never know what to expect from him.
"Cherish I will see you later." He said basically telling her to go. She got her purse and left without saying a word. I just stood there. Luke reached in his pocket and took out his cigarettes.
"Would you like one?" He offered.
"No." I said quietly.
"You sure?"
I nodded. He took out one, lit it, and took a puff.
"Where were you?" He asked nonchalantly. Oh my God. Here we go. I need to think of something to tell him.
"I went to the beach and accidentally fell asleep. I'm sorry." I spoke hoping that would be good enough. I knew it wouldn't be. Luke nodded and took another puff of his cig.
"Manny, why do you lie to me? Huh. I'm just asking a simple question."
"I'm not lying."
Luke put his cigarette down on the counter.
He exhaled, "You know Manny, you are the stupidest person I have ever fuckin met. I mean your fuckin standing here talking to me like I'm some idiot. Do you think I'm an idiot?"
I didn't answer right away. He walked closer to me.
"Do you?"
"No."
"Then tell me where the FUCK you were?" He yelled loudly. Very loud. I started to cry.
"Oh shut the fuck up."
Of course I started crying even more.
"Don't pull that little girl bullshit now. Where were you?" He asked in my face. I figured lying was better than telling him where I really was.
"I was on the beach." I wept. He didn't except that.
"Fuck Manny." He said as he grabbed my hair and flung me across the room. Before I could get up he was already next to me again. He hit me knocking me back down. Right in the eye. It went like completely black on the side. I have never experienced anything like that before. I thought I was fucking blind. He lifted me up by my wrist and slammed me against the wall. I was so scared. I really didn't want to get hit in my face again.
"You're worthless. Get the fuck out." he said and then walked off to his bedroom. I was relieved. As I walked out the door I immediately thought, What do I do now?
plez review.i luv u. and letz juss say next chap involves a reunion,a party,family,and emma
