A/N: A chapter that is not quite as long as usual. For multiple reasons - because it just seemed like a natural place to break off, and because I wanted to get one more uploaded before the hurricane gets here. The next one might be a behemoth, especially if power goes out and I have nothing to do but write and ride out the storm.
I suppose you could call this a 'realization' chapter. When a character who has all the puzzle pieces, but no desire to put to them together talks with a character with all of the push and no pieces, something's bound to get put together. What will the finished image be? Perhaps something that neither of them expected.
As always, thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy.
"Ferb, we have to talk."
The statement was so forceful that it immediately captured his attention. He could tell by her tone that something serious was up. And not just her tone, but the fact that she was independently trying to strike up a conversation with him.
So, he mentally filed away his current page number - two hundred and ninety six - and closed the book, placing it on the couch next to him.
Sitting up straighter and removing his feet from the coffee table, Ferb turned until he was directly facing Isabella. She seemed nervous for some reason. And frustrated. Not at him, he hoped, though he was unsure what he could've done that would merit her ire anyway.
"I'm about to ask you a really, really stupid-sounding question." she said, hesitating. "But I swear that I have good reason and I need, like really need, you to answer me."
He raised one eyebrow a little ways. Where was this going? He honestly had no idea. It must be something important, though, if she thought it necessary to first ensure that he answer.
She looked at him for a few moments more, then took a deep breath.
"What in the freaking world is going on with Phineas?!" she suddenly exclaimed.
Ferb blinked in surprise at the outburst. This… this was not what he'd expected this conversation to be about. With Phineas? He felt the tiniest of urges to roll his eyes dramatically, but resisted. It had been a long time since Isabella had complained to him about his brother. On the order of years, almost.
Of course, she hadn't given up in her pursuit of Phineas, but Ferb was not inclined to get himself tangled up in a matter such as that. It could quickly turn messy at a moment's notice, he knew, and he wanted as much distance between himself and the issue as possible. If it worked out, everything would be fine. And if it imploded, at least he'd be fairly insulated from the blast and resulting fallout that was sure to follow. At its root, it was between Isabella and Phineas - and simply none of his business.
That couldn't exactly apply when she insisted on making it his business, however.
"Ferb!" Isabella demanded. "I said I need an answer!" Her tone was almost confrontational to a degree that was rather shocking. Then again - this was a matter that she had a lot of passion for. Perhaps he could forgive her this one time.
"Please?" she added, almost begging.
Ferb blinked once more, and then took a breath. What was she expecting him to say, anyway? Was this even about her constant attempts to flirt with his brother? It didn't seem so - she'd never acted so… straightforward? about it in the past. At least, she hadn't for a good while now.
Oh, well. He thought. Go with what you know.
Which, based on what she'd said - wasn't exactly much. What was going on with Phineas? Not that much, as far as he'd seen. He'd been interrupting the normal schedule for a bit to help Candace recover from what was apparently quite a messy breakup, but other than that, seemed perfectly normal to Ferb.
As he thought about it, there did seem to be something else a bit off, but that was probably just the general oddity of the schedule being broken after so long.
So, perhaps she was upset about his breaking of the schedule? It seemed reasonable enough. And knowing Isabella, Ferb was sure that in some way or another, this linked back to her crush on his brother. Did she just want to have her mind set at ease that no, Phineas was not abandoning her?
"Ferb…" she said. "Please, I can't tell what you mean when you just blink like that. You're gonna have to, you know, actually answer me."
So he would. Only around Phineas - and Candace, on extremely rare occasions - was that not necessary.
"Phineas' feelings for you have remained unchanged." he said aloud. "Despite his recent trend of breaking the schedule, I've yet to see anything that would give me reason to believe he's either accepted or rejected your advances."
"Oh, haven't you?" she almost demanded. "You haven't? That's - no, that's impossible. You've had to have seen it! You were there! This morning!"
Now he was thoroughly confused and unsure as to what she was talking about. Of course he'd been there this morning - so had she. What had happened that was so obvious that it was apparently impossible to miss - and yet had still snuck by him?
He mentally replayed the morning's events in his head. Well, Phineas had been somewhat quieter than usual, he supposed, but that wasn't anything to get worked up over to this degree. Then again, this was Isabella, after all. He supposed that she might have taken it more to heart than was logically reasonable to do.
If he wished to communicate this to her, however, chances were great that he would have to, once again, speak aloud.
Before he could speak however, she exploded out with another almost desperate sounding exclamation. Apparently he'd taken too long to mull things over.
"Surely you have to know what I'm talking about!" she insisted. "You were literally sitting right next to him! When he sat there and sighed like a - I don't know! - and went - went…" She paused and took a breath, looking up at the roof.
"I am." she drawled sweetly, in a much higher-pitched voice than before.
"Like that." she insisted, returning to her normal tone. "I know you heard it, too."
He leaned back and thought for a second. Now that she mentioned it, he supposed that was a pretty accurate imitation of the way his brother had sounded for that brief period of time. Ferb tilted his head upward, studying the ceiling. Huh. Maybe this was a bit stranger than he'd first assumed. Because his brother had sounded like that, hadn't he?
It was actually pretty funny, if you thought about it.
"You're right." he admitted aloud, for her benefit. "I hadn't noticed before, but you are right."
She scooted farther back into the couch, as if slightly satisfied with herself. But that emotion was fleeting and soon disappeared into an ocean of worry that swept across her face as clear as the daylight.
"No, you don't get it." she said, concern clearly marking her tone. "He wasn't talking like that because he was finally starting to see what's between us. It wasn't - wasn't directed at me. It was meant for someone else, Ferb. Someone else! How - how - it can't be. But it is! And I don't know what to do."
Once again, he leaned back in thought. She was right - the words didn't seem to have been directed at her. But then what - or who, as ludicrous as the idea was - could have been the intended target?
They'd been talking about Phineas' extended efforts to help Candace recover from her breakup. As he was prone to do, Phineas had almost let the secret slip, but Ferb had jumped in quickly enough to stop him before that happened.
Then Isabella had said 'Well, at least you're enjoying yourself.'
And that was when Phineas had sighed so uncharacteristically and said 'I am.' - and said it in such a way that it had convinced Isabella that he was... starting to crush on someone else. He smiled as he thought of it. The idea was entirely bizarre… and yet, he couldn't quite deny that tone, now that it had been brought to the forefront of his mind.
Ferb frowned slightly as he recalled the events of the morning. It was rather strange, wasn't it? His thoughts drifted back to the past week and a bit that had gone by. Was there anything else unusual that he'd so far failed to notice?
As far as he'd originally thought, no. Well, aside from Phineas shaking up the normal schedule for so long - but that could be easily be excused. After all, he was spending that time trying to help Candace out of her slump, and seemed to be doing pretty decently at it, as far as Ferb had seen.
That wasn't too terribly unusual. He knew well enough how close his brother was with his sister, and he was sure that the emotion was returned in kind, although Candace tended to show it less than Phineas did. So, really, it only made sense for Phineas to decide upon flouting the schedule so. It had never been a secret that Phineas was incredibly admiring of and close to their older sister. Even from way back in the day before she joined in their projects with them, that had always been a constant. Ferb certainly loved his sister, and was confident that she loved him too, but there was something Phineas and Candace had between them that he had yet to match. Perhaps it sprang from a time, many years ago, when they were alone. That was certainly a reasonable assumption.
And was there anything else noteworthy? Well… not really, to be honest. But now that it'd been mentioned, he had heard his brother speak in that tone before. Just as recently as last night, even.
They had been up in their bedroom, preparing to go to sleep, and as was his wont, Phineas was rambling on at length about every subject under the sun. First the topic of the conversation had been what they'd had for dinner, then it had changed to prospective plans for future inventions, then back to that night's dinner. In one way or another, however, the topic of discussion had gotten around to Candace's slow recovery from her break up.
"I don't know, Ferb." Phineas had said, his voice slowly dropping some of its normal enthusiasm in favor of the dreamy tone that had become such a mystery. "Everything seems like it's going swimmingly. I don't want to, you know, jump to conclusions or anything, but - but, I don't know." He stopped for a second, but not really with an air of one who hesitates. "Candace - she - I don't know. She's getting back to her old self. It's great! It's - it's funny. Well, not funny. I feel funny, I mean. But it's in a good way, almost like - like on Thanksgiving when you eat until you're just so full. You feel kinda weird - almost queasy - but at the same time, it's so good."
Ferb hadn't thought much of it at the time, simply ascribing it to… well, he hadn't really ascribed it to anything. And not really even thought about it all that much. But now, as he sat on the couch and attempted to 'simply ascribe' it to a cause, he realized something quite odd. It - well, it wouldn't go anywhere.
Now, that was quite funny, wasn't it?
Trying to tack his brother's jumbled words onto excitement that Candace was feeling better made no sense. Since when did that sort of thing make you feel 'almost queasy'? And even if it did make Phineas feel that way for some reason, that still wouldn't explain his far-away, almost quixotic tone.
It was almost the same tone that he heard every morning, running through Isabella's casual greetings - stemming directly from the crush she'd nursed on his brother almost as long as he could remember. But Phineas didn't have a crush on anyone. His brother? A crush? The idea made him smile.
But the smile slowly faded as he mentally compared to the two tones in his head. They weren't merely almost the same thing, he realized. They were the same thing. Down to the last inflection - laden with the sort of pining that he'd grown accustomed to seeing in Isabella on an almost daily basis. But in his brother? The idea nearly defied his comprehension. To think that someone had finally gotten through the obliviousness that Isabella had been trying and failing to break through for years… Ferb was both impressed and confused and amused at the same time. And more than everything, just plain surprised.
It really was funny, if you thought about it.
But there was a chink in the theory. Who? Who was the person who'd managed to finally penetrate his brother's oblivion - and to such a great degree that it was becoming noticeable to the people around him? This sort of thing had only really been happening for the past week and a half or so. And Phineas had spent the last week and a half cooped up in the house with…
…
Suddenly, it wasn't so funny anymore.
"...Ferb?" he heard Isabella ask, her voice slicing through the sudden cacophony in his brain. "Are - are you okay?"
The question snapped him back to reality and he blinked once - twice - thrice.
"You went like, pale, for a second," she pointed out. "I - it was kinda freaky. But you are okay, right?"
He went pale? Well, it was entirely forgivable in his mind, considering the shock. But he couldn't just leap to a conclusion this far-fetched without at least… at least making some effort to disprove it. Ferb had had a crush only once in his life, many years ago on Vanessa Doofenshmirtz. It had been as strong as any, but had kind of fizzled out without going anywhere. He'd not seen or even thought of her for a very long time now, but could still clearly remember the feelings he'd had when he saw her for the first time at the blueprint warehouse.
At least Ferb had had the presence of mind to realize what it was that he felt - and not so horribly misattribute the butterflies in his stomach to 'queasiness'. Any other person he would have instantly labeled as being purposefully obtuse. But Phineas… well, he could believe it.
"What is it?" Isabella insisted. "I know I'm terrible at reading you - but, come on. Even a literal blind person could have read you just then. You've got to tell me!"
He had to tell her? When he could barely process the concept himself?
Because if he was right - and you'd better believe he was looking for any way to disprove himself - it would mean that Phineas most certainly did have a crush… even if he was somehow unconscious of it himself.
But not just any crush. A crush - a crush on their sister.
Ferb felt a shiver run up his spine as he internally recoiled from the idea.
It was disturbing - it was unnatural - it was just flat-out creepy in more ways than one.
And it actually made sense.
But what was the worst of all - the more he thought about it, all the missing puzzle pieces clicked neatly into place, almost effortlessly. As he pondered his brother's behavior in this context, it all came and meshed flawlessly together, forming a perfectly clear picture.
A picture of a boy - teenager - who had an incestuous crush on his own sister.
No. He thought. I'm jumping to this conclusion based on almost no evidence - and without even talking to Phineas himself.
But despite what he told himself, the evidence seemed overpowering. And though he mentally pushed the conclusion away until he could find a time to talk to Phineas, it towered over his subconscious, overshadowing all else in his mind.
How else could you explain the seeming ease with which Phineas had tossed aside the old schedule in favor of sticking with his sister? Sure, you might pin it on a purely platonic bond - but assuming that flew directly into the face of the decidedly non-platonic tone that his brother had begun lapsing into using. And the feelings he had been struggling to describe each night.
How could he have missed this? Now it seemed - it seemed so obvious.
How the long rambles that Phineas would embark on in the evenings, spinning on at length about every subject under the sun, often instantly devolved into stammering and awkward, forced similes when the subject of Candace's breakup recovery was brought up. But not her recovery specifically - instead, how he felt about it - about her.
And yet, time after time, the subject would be brought up again and again - as if he simply couldn't get his fill of talking about it.
Ferb was used to sitting back and letting his brother steer the conversation wherever he desired. When you didn't speak aloud that much, letting others direct the flow of chatter came naturally. But still, there were only so many times Phineas could bring up the strange things he was feeling while comforting Candace before it cast severe shadow over the nature of their bond. At least, there should have been. How had Ferb not seen it?
Having missed all this at the time only made it hit harder now, as the realization became clearer and clearer.
And his own thoughts came back to haunt him. Just minutes ago, he'd been wondering who it had been that had managed to pierce Phineas' oblivion in such a short amount of time, when Isabella had been failing for years. He wondered no longer. Because no one had done anything in a short amount of time - that would have been simply impossible. But Candace? She hadn't had to. Because unlike Isabella, Phineas had been rubbing shoulders with his older sister for literally his entire life.
"Ferb!" Isabella exclaimed again, the exasperation in her voice once again bordering on demanding. "What is it? You've got to tell me. Phineas is - he's - I love him, Ferb. You know that. I know you know that. You've got to tell me what's going on!"
And of all times to discover that his brother was harboring romantic feelings for their sister, he had to do it now. Sitting directly across the couch from the girl next door, who had crushed on Phineas since almost the day they met. If Ferb was right, as he feared he was, then there was no way he could break the news now.
And I still don't know if I am right. He told himself. It's surely possible that Phineas will have a different - and completely mundane - explanation for all this, right?
He feared that such would not be the case. But he couldn't worry about that right now. There would be plenty of time for it later. Right now he had to deal with Isabella Garcia-Shapiro.
But for the first time in as long as he could remember, Ferb simply didn't know what to say.
What could he say? Tell her the truth? That seemed like a bad idea - one that would only lead to utter disaster. The subject of Phineas' feelings was one that was very near and dear to Isabella's heart. And for her to so suddenly learn that not only did the boy she'd crushed on for years indeed like someone else, but that that 'someone else' was, in all likelihood, his own sister?
Ferb considered himself to be… quite impartial in most ways, and tried his best to always look at both sides of a situation before passing judgement on it. But this? It was almost too much for him to process right now. And he knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that the girl sitting across from him would not be so calm in the face of what appeared to loom in front of them.
Then what could he say?
Lying was never a good idea. All that'd do would be to make everything that much more convoluted and painful when the truth eventually came out. But if telling her the truth was a bad idea, and he'd made up his mind to not lie…
"Isabella." he said slowly, carefully forming the words. "This is a matter that concerns my brother very personally. As such, I feel it would be best if I talked with him before discussing his feelings."
There. That was a good compromise. And it was entirely true - Ferb had to get ahold of and talk to his brother, if not for quite exactly the reason he had implied.
Because only by talking with Phineas could he ever truly put the matter to rest. And however slim the chance might be that Ferb was drastically missing the real root of the recent goings-on, he was unwilling to fully commit to such an… idea until that chance was entirely eradicated.
This was not the sort of thing you guessed at. This was the sort of thing you had to know. For absolute sure.
But Isabella was clearly not satisfied with the non-answer he had so delicately tried to pass off.
"Oh, come on!" she replied, the frustration boiling out of her tone. "I already know something's going on. I just - I just need to know with what. Or - or who. Because it - it's supposed to be me, Ferb! Not anyone else! Do you know how long I've waited to hear him speak like that to - to me?"
Ferb nodded grimly.
He understood very well exactly how strongly she felt on this subject. She'd let him - and everybody else - know a long time ago, and reinforced that knowledge every passing day. The day she ever realized that the object of her affections had… other ideas about where his romantic interest should lie would be a dark day indeed.
But there had to be some compromise he could reach with her - one that would at least allow him time to bring up the matter to Phineas first.
Ferb wasn't quite sure why he felt this way. He should be absolutely disgusted at what he thought was inside of his brother's subconscious mind. And to be fair, in large part, he was. The idea of seeing his stepsister in a romantic way was entirely repulsive to him. But although he considered his brother's apparent crush fully indefensible, Phineas was still his brother, and nothing, not even - not even what seemed to be a latent incestuous crush could change that.
And thus it was that he found himself inclined to give his brother the benefit of the doubt, even on a matter such as this. No matter how unsavory he found the idea of his brother indeed harboring such feelings, Ferb was still unwilling to act rashly or without thinking - Phineas deserved at least that much. Whether Isabella could find it inside herself to come to such a similar conclusion seemed highly doubtful to him.
Even as all these thoughts were running through his brain, he could see her simmering in annoyance and exasperation at his repeated avoidance of direct answers.
Maybe it was time to be more straightforward.
"I cannot give you an answer in good conscience until after I have talked with my brother," he repeated firmly. "At the moment he is otherwise occupied with our sister," Doing what, he briefly wondered, shuddering slightly, before putting the thought out of his head. This was still Phineas after all, the boy so oblivious he had somehow developed a crush without realizing it. "But if you will give me until next morning to discuss this matter with him, then I can promise you a direct answer then, at the very latest."
He really couldn't promise her a direct answer. Why did he say that? He'd just been looking for something to temporarily sate the girl, but that? He felt urge to kick himself very strongly just then. It was only going against his own rule - to never get tangled up in the affairs of others - they were not his business, and it was best if they stayed that way. But ignorance is bliss - and, sadly, he was no longer ignorant.
Isabella frowned deeply, quite obviously upset with the world.
"Oh, come on!" she protested. "You can't be serious! This is important to me! What - what if I just go up there right now and ask him myself what's going on?"
She could try that all she wanted, he thought. But she hadn't been privy to his and Phineas' many late-night conversations that had been chock-full of disturbingly clear implications that had still somehow slipped under his nose. And without that knowledge, he was confident she would be unable to uncover the truth on her own. Besides, for reasons still unknown to him, Isabella refused to directly state her feelings to Phineas. So he highly doubted that she would do so here, either.
And by her own reactions, he could tell that something of the same sort must have been running through her head too. Her eyebrows lowered, and her eyes narrowed to tiny slits.
"Fine." she said flatly, staring daggers at him. "But I will be back over here first thing tomorrow morning, and I swear, Fletcher, if you don't give me a direct answer, I'll - I'll - I don't know! But - but you will, right? You promised."
That was true. Wise or unwise - he had indeed. And it was probably a decision he was going to regret come tomorrow morning. Still, he nodded slowly. A promise was a promise, and surely there was still a chance that he was misinterpreting everything. Surely.
Ferb almost laughed at his own attempts to lie to himself. Who was he kidding?
I'm kidding no one. He thought. And until I hear it directly from Phineas himself, then as far as I am concerned, I am wrong.
It wasn't like he was going to be debating this for much longer. The afternoon had slipped away and evening was fast approaching. Soon enough Phineas and Candace were going to come back from wherever they were, and then, there would be words.
Isabella huffed and groaned dramatically, but eventually relented, and the subject was at last dropped from conversation, though not from his mind.
A few long minutes passed, and she slid off of the couch in a huff and stalked out the sliding glass door, disappearing into the backyard - probably heading towards to her own home.
Once alone, Ferb inhaled deeply and let the breath out slowly.
All of the sudden, this summer that had seemed so similar to the ones before had been turned on its head, and he was unsure if this was the sort of thing that one could feasibly recover from.
He picked up his book and tried to get back into it, but his brain refused to focus on the written words. Instead, it flew back once more into the past, dragging up incident after incident that had seemed so perfectly ordinary at first. It was like looking at them all under an entirely different light now - now that he suspected what he did.
The time a week and a half ago when Phineas had complained about feeling sick to his stomach after Candace had exploded at him, and then stormed off. How he'd been unable to let the situation go all day. The many times he had come into the room beaming with a radiant glow that should not have been possible for a person who just spent hours in a room trying to cheer someone up. The time he had sprawled across his bed and straight-up said, "I don't really know how I feel, you know? It's weird. But good. Like those 'mystery flavor' candies. You can't really name what it is, but you still like it. And I do."
How much of that had been natural brotherly affection for a sibling who just went through a no doubt painful break up? And how much had been something… else? There was just no way of knowing,
But Isabella had seen the signs. And once she'd pointed them out, the whole house of cards had come tumbling down.
He had to get ahold of his brother. And tell him…
… tell him what?
Tell him that such a thing was unnatural? That it was repellent, that it even now made small shivers of distaste run up his spine?
And, for some blasted reason, he didn't want to tell his brother that.
Phineas was so - so innocent. It was strange to think that, especially when Phineas was only a year younger than he. But it was undeniably true. And Ferb had no doubt that this - this crush… on their sister, as morally reprehensible as it seemed, sprang from only the best and purest of roots.
Heck, it appeared as if his brother wasn't even aware of his own crush. And what could you do with that?
Ferb refused to allow this train of thought to proceed any farther, as he realized where it was inevitably heading.
Incest - it, well it wasn't right. That was the socially acceptable norm. But why?
Well… there were the nasty effects it could have on reproduction, via blunting the body's naturally redundant chromosomes. That was a reason - and a decent one too.
Ferb shuddered again, suddenly realizing that he'd just glossed over the fact that for such a thing to even be remotely relevant, his brother and sister would have to have children together.
And what made it worse? The knowledge that even that ultimate justification for avoiding such things could easily be circumvented. All it would take would be afternoon's work, most likely, less if they could get a musical montage started. The design of a device capable of opening a human chromosome set and detecting and repairing errors wouldn't be nearly as complex as some of the things they'd done in the past.
He jumped up off the couch, shaking his head back and forth, trying to rid his head of these thoughts.
Even as he thought these things, he knew what the ultimate climax of his internal debate would be. He could already sense it, somewhere deep in his subconscious.
If he had to admit it, Phineas' crush was the most surprising part of the whole thing. That it was on Candace?
...not so much.
He had just been thinking about the close bond between his brother and sister. And, honestly, it made a frightening amount of sense, in its own strange, strange way. Phineas was almost infinitely friendly, and would have no doubt have tried to build bridges (both figuratively and literally) with anyone he met. Was it so far-fetched to believe that the person who had been there for his entire life, more or less, might eventually grow to become the object of an affection that was deeper than purely platonic?
And the stark truth, was no, no it wasn't.
Ferb knew about the concept of romantic desensitization - the concept that 'familiarity breeds contempt', the normally almost hardwired tendency of the human brain to cease seeing potential romantic partners in persons one grows sufficiently close to in other ways.
But he also knew that 'normal' was the farthest thing from an accurate descriptor for his brother. And as the shock of the realization slowly wore away, he almost accepted it. The idea was still off-putting and unsettling, but that was more viewing it from his own perspective. Would he ever crush on his older sister?
The question was met with a resounding mental 'no'. But Phineas…? Knowing what he did of his brother's relationship with their sister, and knowing what he knew from the past week? With the slightest of sighs, he at last relented to the inevitable.
Yes, he could see it.
Well, whoever the object of his brother's crush was, it was his brother's crush. Which meant it had nothing at all to do with him, thus, being firmly in the realm of things that were not his business.
And as a general rule, Ferb liked to remain out of things were not his business. If it had been at all feasible, he would have liked to simply let the situation remain as it had for the past week and a half. If Phineas was too blind to see his own feelings, then nothing would happen, and no one would have to deal with the potential fallout of such a situation developing further.
But the problem was, Isabella had noticed that something was going on. And although she had eventually given in to his demand that she wait until the next morning, he doubted he could keep pushing her away forever.
And so he found himself caught between a rock and a hard place. How would Phineas react to having the correct label put on his feelings? How would Isabella react to the realization that her almost life-long crush actually did have feelings for someone else?
Neither of those things seemed particularly desirable. But if one was to be avoided, then the other must be invoked. Why had he so rashly made that promise? It was probably all that had convinced Isabella to so grudgingly wait. But tomorrow morning was not going to be fun because of it.
Still, when it came down to it, his mind was made up in an instant. He had to talk to Phineas, and had to get the correct label applied once and for all. And knowing his brother, Ferb was simply unsure as to what that might bring. Phineas was entirely unpredictable sometimes… and giving him the label would also give him an outlet for his heretofore stifled feelings, an outlet which had never been opened before.
As he slowly climbed the stairs from the living room, he knew one thing for sure. Whether or not Phineas' crush ever went anywhere, some things would never be the same again.
Even as he waited for his brother and sister to return home, he still found himself unsure as to what he would say.
His own personal inclination when it came to audible speech was 'less is more'. Simply, to be as concise and straightforward as possible. But to handle such a convoluted situation concisely… well, it made him wonder if it was indeed the best way.
But the truth often stung, and although Ferb was still unsure as to who exactly it would sting this time, he still determined to just be as straightforward as possible.
Oh, who was he kidding? This was Phineas. Trying to have a conversation about this would probably require an amount of bluntness that would have offended any other person on the planet. And even having the conversation still wouldn't put the matter with Isabella immediately to rest. But if Phineas knew the real reason for the 'strangeness' he kept constantly bringing up - then he could also at least make some effort to hide it.
Whether that would have any degree of success at all was still up in the air. And it was probably doomed to fail, considering his brother's dismal track record when it came to such things. And Isabella's record when it came to finding out such things.
Ferb reached up and ran his hand through his hair.
No matter what he did, or tried to do, eventually the full truth would come out - a truth that would probably bring with it a host of unpleasant conflicts and clashes. He could only hope that he could at least delay the inevitability.
And if he delayed it long enough, maybe it would peter out. Maybe Phineas would realize that his feelings for his sister were far-fetched things that Candace would never return in kind. And maybe the whole situation would collapse in on itself, releasing the pent-up steam out slowly and gently and quietly.
At this point, that was really all he could hope for.
He almost felt guilty for finding himself wishing for such a thing. If his brother really felt as he seemed to, then even the most gentle of collapses would be painful. And never in a million years would Ferb have done anything to harm his brother - emotionally or otherwise. But the sort of relationship that he was now almost sure that Phineas subconsciously wanted with Candace could never really happen, could it? To think so… it was absurd, right? It was - it was impossible.
And even he recognized the irony in that thought.
The silence of the bedroom was broken by the sound the sliding glass door downstairs opening. The time of confrontation was at hand. Ferb sat down on his bed and waited patiently, sure that his brother would come up in no time at all.
"...that wasn't so bad, now was it?" he heard Candace's voice say.
"No, no it wasn't." That was Phineas.
"And you thought you'd be bored, didn't you?" Candace laughed briefly. And Ferb did have to admit, she sounded a lot like her old self. Whether or not there had been anything beneath the surface with Phineas' attempts to comfort her, he had done well.
"Well, not really." Phineas replied. Ferb could hear them coming up the stairs. "I knew that between us, we could find someway to make it exciting. I wish Ferb could've been there. It would have been awesome."
There was a brief pause before she answered.
"Yes, yes it would have, I guess." she finally said. "Well, I have to go change - and probably shower. Look at this! Can our washing machine even get motor fluid off?"
"I think so." Phineas answered. "Once I spilled some oil on my favorite shorts, and it came right out after I ran them through like three times."
"Uh huh. Guess I'll have to see. Well, I'll be out in a bit."
"Okay."
Ferb heard Candace's bedroom door shut and latch. And, just as he had expected, moments later Phineas himself bounced into the room, absolutely glowing.
"Hey Ferb!" he greeted, flinging himself down on his bed and sighing long and loud.
Ferb was taken aback by the look in his brother's eyes. It was that same look that Isabella carried with her everywhere Phineas could be found - starry-eyed and oh so unsubtle. How could he have missed this before? Now it was so obvious it was almost like looking at an entirely different person.
If he had had any doubt before, it was put to rest almost immediately. Now there was just one final step to being absolutely sure - getting confirmation from Phineas himself.
