Most of the time, Carol could handle the death of her father. She could forget about it when she worked in engineering surrounded by the hum and buzz of life; both from her colleagues and the ship. It was times like this that were the most difficult. Lying in bed, awake, staring at the white ceiling found her thinking through his actions at the end. How could he have become so war driven so quickly? To endanger the lives of so many in a lust for weapons was so unlike the man who had bought her ice creams in the park. Her hands clenched into balls when she thought about how he'd used people to get what he wanted. Eventually it was this that had caused his death.
His fall from grace had caused a swift and terrible retribution that had brought suffering to many. She didn't understand why. Where had his paranoia about the Klingons come from in the first place? Yes, they were a war like people and perhaps conflict between them and Star Fleet would happen but her father's fear took it to another level entirely. The worst part of the whole thing was how she hadn't seen it coming. He'd shown no visible signs of delusion until the very end, maybe if she'd been more vigilant she could have prevented it from happening. He had to have displayed some unusual behaviour, even before he cut her off. Carol couldn't think of any. She was only left with the aftermath and the endless self doubt. Could she have prevented it?
