DISCLAIMERS: I don't own anything except seven seasons of 'Castle' on DVD, seven 'Nikki Heat' books and everything I've ever written that's 'Castle' related.

SUMMARY: Castle heads up to Lake Placid to get Kate.

A/N #1: I want to thank everybody who has reviewed the last several chapters. I really want to particularly thank WRTRD for all of the encouragement and ValzBrownie for letting me know that I'm getting it right.

A HOLE IN THE HEART

CHAPTER 11: A Race Against Time

"Bro, what is in Lake Placid?" Espo asked Castle, who had taken out his phone and was preparing to make phone calls.

"Kate's fathers' cabin is about 15 minutes from town," Castle answered before he spoke into his phone. "Jim, it's Rick. I need for you to call me back immediately. It's an emergency." He hung up and made one more call. "I need to speak to Dr. Burke. It's urgent."

Burke came on the phone a moment later. "This is Dr. Burke."

"Dr. Burke, it's Rick Castle. I desperately need your help. Kate has gone to Lake Placid. I think she needs to be hospitalized and I'm going to need your help to get her back to the city."

"Do you know where she is in Lake Placid?"

"Yeah, I know where she's going."

"Where are you now?"

"I'm at Kennedy along with two of Kate's colleagues. I'm going to see about chartering us a plane to fly up there, but like I said, I'm probably going to need your help and I'm also waiting to hear from Kate's father. I might need his help, as well."

"It's after four o'clock, Rick. If I cancel my appointments and leave right now, I still probably won't be there until close to six."

"That's fine. I need to let my mother know what's going on and that will give Kate's father a chance to call me and hopefully get here, too. Call me when you arrive."

"Okay."

***CCC***

At the house, Martha was pacing the living room waiting to hear from Richard. The children were sitting on the sofa watching their grandmother. Both of them knew that something was very wrong, but they were afraid to voice their fears. "Where did mommy go?" Jack whispered to his sister.

"I don't know. She'll be back pretty soon, Jack," Ariel slipped her arm around her little brother.

"No, she won't. Daddy was mad when he left," Jack's loud whispers finally attracted Martha's attention.

"Oh my babies," she knelt down in front of them. "Your daddy wasn't mad. He's scared for your mommy. She hasn't been feeling well and he wants to find her before she gets worse."

"She's not sick," Jack vehemently disagreed. "She's crazy. There's a big difference."

"James Jackson Castle, why on earth would you say something like that?"

"Because I've heard her tell everybody that she isn't crazy. Why does she keep saying that? She sees people that aren't there. Only crazy people do that."

Martha didn't understand how someone so young could be so bright and intuitive. Alexis had been incredibly smart when she was Jack's age, but Jack clearly outshone his older sister. She made a decision that she was almost sure her son and daughter-in-law wouldn't agree with. She got up and sat between the two children. "Has your daddy told you anything about the man that your mommy keeps seeing?"

"Only that she used to know him and he lives upstate," Ariel told her grandmother.

"Before your mommy married your daddy, she had another boyfriend. His name was Josh and he was a heart doctor. He also used to ride a motorcycle, so he would wear a black leather jacket."

"Like the one mommy has in her closet?" Jack asked.

"Exactly like that one."

"Did daddy like Josh?"

"I think your daddy was jealous of Josh because he liked your mommy. But I don't think that he didn't not like him. He just didn't know him very well. When your mommy got shot, Josh saved her life."

"How did mommy get shot?" Jack wanted to know.

"It happened a very long time ago. Ariel knows some of it, but mommy will tell you all about it when you're a little older." Martha's tale was interrupted by the ringing of the telephone. She looked at the caller id and jumped to her feet. "It's your father. Richard?"

"Mother, are the kids all right?"

"They're fine. Did you find out where Katherine went?"

"Yes. She's headed to the cabin. Dr. Burke is going to meet me and the boys here at the airport. I'm going to charter a plane to Lake Placid to bring her back. I'm just waiting to hear from Jim now. Mother, she's going to have to be hospitalized. It's not something that I want to do, but I can't have her disappearing. The next time I might not be able to track her so easily."

"I know, Richard. And I'm so sorry. Is there anything that you want me to do?"

"Call Alexis and Lanie. Let them know what's going on. Don't tell the kids the whole story. I'll tell them something when I get home."

"All right, Richard. Be careful. I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Did daddy find mommy?" Ariel asked when her grandmother ended the call.

"Where were we in our story?" Martha sat back down, avoiding the question.

"Josh saved mommy's life," Jack reminded her.

"Yes, he did. But, your mommy didn't love him. She loved your daddy, but she was afraid to tell him. But, your mommy broke up with Josh."

"Was he mad?" Jack asked.

"We didn't know it at the time, but yes. He was very upset. Right after your mommy and daddy got married, Josh hurt your mommy. And that's all that I'm going to tell you about that. But he hurt your mommy and because of that, he had to go to prison."

"Is he still there?" Ariel asked.

"Yes. Daddy and I don't know why your mommy is seeing him when he isn't there, but she is. Right now, I want you to play quietly because I have to call Alexis and your Auntie Lanie. No listening in, Ariel. I mean it."

"Okay."

***CCC***

It was cold inside of the cabin. Kate sat down on the battered sofa and removed the two bottles of liquor from the paper bag. The Dewar's was a bottle of 12-year-old Scotch. She knew that Castle would be impressed, although he preferred a much more expensive brand. She remembered how impressed he'd been when he'd learned that Kate also appreciated a good glass of Scotch on occasion.

Now that she had the bottles out, she realized that she had a major problem. There was no way that she could open the bottles with one hand. She stared at her still heavily bandaged hand and knew that the bandages were going to have to go. She unraveled her hand, grimacing at the sight of her black-stitched fingers and palm. After her hand was uncovered, she flexed her hand, almost screaming out in pain as the stitches loosened up. But at least she could now open the liquor bottles.

'So, what happens if you drink yourself into oblivion?' She looked to find Josh sitting beside her on the couch. 'Tequila and Scotch? What're you trying to do, Kate? Kill yourself?'

'I can't kill my baby, Josh. They're going to take my babies away from me. I can't live if I can't be with my babies.'

'You could take them with you.'

'No, Josh. I'm not a murderer. I'm not like that crazy woman in Houston who drowned her babies in the bathtub.'

'Do you remember when we would get drunk and then fuck for hours?'

'No! I'm not sleeping with you!'

Kate looked to her side and saw that nobody was there. "Damn it, Josh! Get out of my head!"

To erase the memories in her head, she quickly opened the bottle of Scotch and raised it to her lips, taking a drink, relishing the burn of alcohol as it seared through her body. "Oh, that's good," she quickly took another drink. The alcohol began to numb everything, making her feel mellow for the first time in what felt like ages.

When the sun went down, the temperature inside of the cabin dropped to arctic temperatures, but Kate no longer cared. The alcohol was warming her blood and body, making her oblivious to everything else around her.

***CCC***

"Rick!" Castle saw Jim Beckett rushing toward where they were waiting at one of the private aviation counters. "What's going on with Katie? You didn't make a lot of sense over the phone."

"Jim, you remember Dr. Burke?"

"Yes, of course," the two men shook hands. "Now, would one of you please tell me what's going on with my daughter? Why in the hell did she go up to the cabin?"

"Mr. Beckett, I have reason to believe that Kate is suffering from postpartum psychosis. She's becoming paranoid and thinks that we're all conspiring to take her children away from her and lock her up in some kind of cuckoo's nest type of facility. It's imperative that we get to her and get her some help before things end in tragedy."

"But you are talking about locking her up?"

"Will Kate have to be hospitalized? In all likelihood, yes," Dr. Burke told Kate's anxious father. "But, we're not going to take her children away from her. In fact, having her children close by will be a huge step in her healing process. I've already spoken to a colleague of mine who is ready to begin treating Kate the moment that we find her."

"Mr. Castle?" Castle turned to the man behind the ticket counter. "If your party is all here, we can get you ready to board."

"Yes, we're all here. Thank you." Castle turned once again to Jim. "I've already rented a jeep when we arrive in Lake Placid. Once we land, we can get the car and go up to the cabin."

"Why are you taking them?" Jim nodded toward Ryan and Esposito. "Please tell me you're not going to arrest Katie if she resists."

"That isn't the plan, sir," Ryan informed Jim. "We're hoping that Dr. Burke can convince Kate that she needs help. We're just going for moral support. We're not cops tonight. We're Kate's friends."

"Mr. Beckett, one way or the other, we're bringing Kate back to the city. How difficult or easy it's going to be depends entirely on her," Dr. Burke said.

"I might be able to help you with that. I once was where Katie is right now. I had to be convinced that I needed help. Let me talk to her when we get there. I might be better at it than any of you."

"We can do that," Dr. Burke agreed.

Once they boarded the eight-seat Cessna and took off for Lake Placid, Dr. Burke turned his attention to Rick, who was sitting hunched over in his seat. "Rick, it's important for you to realize that as angry as I know that you are at Kate right now, none of this is her fault. When she recovers, she's not going to remember most of what she's said or done over the past several days. And none of this is your fault, either. You did the best that you could with a condition that's impossible for any of us to understand."

"This will end badly if she doesn't get help, won't it?"

"If we don't get Kate into treatment, she will become one of those stories that you see on the news where a mother drowns her children in a bathtub or throws them from the George Washington Bridge. It's not a question of if it'll happen, but when. This isn't something that you can cure with love or soothing words. This is a serious condition that is so often overlooked by the medical community until something tragic happens."

"I wish . . . I wish that I had seen what was happening with her sooner. Do you think it was the letter from the parole board that started her spinning out of control?"

"Possibly, but the truth is, we'll probably never know. It could've been the combination of that and learning about Hope's condition. Or it could've been there all along and those things just nudged it. I have a brother," Dr. Burke's voice shook as Castle stared at him. "He has cerebral palsy due to a difficult birth. My mother had a very hard time accepting that he wasn't ever going to be a lawyer or a doctor. Times were different then, but it's always hard when you learn that your child isn't perfect."

"I kept trying to explain to her that Hope's condition could correct itself, but she didn't want to hear that."

"That's the condition, Rick. That isn't Kate. If Kate was her normal, rational self, she'd understand all of that. And when she's better, she'll understand it once again. Please be patient and don't give up on her."

"I've never given up on her. And I won't until she tells me that I should."

***CCC***

At the house in Massapequa, Lanie and Alexis had been joined by Jenny Ryan, who had brought her three kids with her. At the moment the two older children were upstairs in Ariel's room with Ariel and Jack while the women sat downstairs with the two babies, who at the moment were both crying. Martha had warmed up a bottle for Hope, who was screaming and refusing to take it, which was upsetting the older woman.

"I've got her, Grams," Alexis offered. "I think Hope senses that you're upset."

Martha handed the baby over to Alexis, who sat down in her father's recliner. "Hey, princess," Alexis crooned to her tiny sister. "You're okay. Everything's going to be okay."

"Martha, is Castle sure that Kate's at her father's cabin?" Jenny asked, as she rocked her own infant daughter to sleep. "What if she isn't there?"

"If Kate's in Lake Placid, then she's at her father's cabin," Martha answered. "They take the kids there after Christmas to ski and make snowmen. It's a little too rugged for my tastes, but the children love it. Kate said she's been going there since she was a little girl."

"That's where she stayed after she got shot," Alexis added.

"I just wish that I could've convinced her to stay at Remy's," Lanie began sobbing for the fourth time since arriving at the house.

"Lanie," Martha walked over and embraced Kate's best friend. "Nothing you could have said or done would've made Kate stay. This isn't your fault, any more than it's Richard's fault."

"Jack?" Jenny looked over and saw the little boy sitting on the stairs with tears running down his face.

"I want my mommy!" He wailed.

"Oh sweetheart," Martha ran over and gathered him into her arms. "Your mommy will be back home before you know it."

"Can Sissy and I sleep in your room tonight? I'm scared without my mommy and daddy."

"Of course you and Ariel can sleep in my room."

"Grams—" Alexis cautioned her, but stopped talking when Martha fixed her with a stern glare.

"I'm sure that your daddy will call us very soon and tell us that your mommy is just fine."

"Did she run away from home?" Jack's blue eyes were very serious as he stared at his grandmother.

"Not exactly. Your mommy just needed some time to herself."

"But she'll be home tonight?"

"Yes, she should be home tonight. Why don't you go upstairs and play while I make all of you some hot chocolate and popcorn?"

"Okay," Jack got down and ran back upstairs.

"Martha, you should know that Kate probably isn't going to be home tonight," Lanie told the older woman.

"Well, he doesn't need to know that, does he?"

***CCC***

It was below freezing and blowing huge flakes of snow when the men arrived at the small airport in Lake Placid. The rental car agency drove them over to the car lot and they all piled into the rented Jeep for the 15 minute drive up the mountain to the cabin. Esposito, Ryan, and Dr. Burke didn't understand why Castle had rented a Jeep until he made the turn onto the rutted dirt road leading to the cabin. At one point, they thought their heads were going to do through the roof of the car due to all of the bouncing. "Nice road," Espo quipped at one point.

"You should travel it after a heavy rain," Jim told them. "If you don't come up here with four-wheel drive, you could get stuck for days."

"It's too bad it's too dark to see," Dr. Burke watched the snow swirling by the windows. "I'm sure it's beautiful up here."

"It is. There's a lake nearby where you can ice skate. Deer, skunks, and raccoons will sometimes come onto the property."

"She's here," Castle said, pulling in behind Kate's rented Hyundai. "One of us is going to have to drive her car back to Lake Placid."

"Javi and I will take it," Ryan volunteered.

"Are you ready, Rick?" Burke asked.

"No, but I have to pretend that I am. Let's go," Castle opened his door as the other men piled out of the car.

There was one light burning when Castle opened the door and stepped inside, rubbing his arms at the frigid temperature inside. "Fuck! It's freezing in here!" Espo yelped, almost bumping into Castle's back.

"Kate!" Castle called out, as he stepped further inside of the cabin.

"Hey, Castle," Ryan pointed out the two opened bottles on the coffee table. Both were half empty.

The cabin was small, consisting of a small living room, an even tinier kitchen/dining area and two bedrooms. When Ariel was born, Jim had enclosed the patio out back into an area which was suitable for sleeping during the summer, but was like a refrigerator during the winter months.

Castle checked the smaller of the two bedrooms first and after finding it empty, he then went to the second bedroom. He opened the door and flipped on the light switch, instantly seeing Kate passed out on the bed, her injured hand now a bloody mess. "Kate! I found her!" He ran over to the bed and checked her pulse, instantly feeling how ice cold she was. Feeling a steady beat under his fingers, he began shaking her. "Kate! Kate! Wake up!"

Kate felt someone shaking her, but it was warm where she was. She was warm and safe. Nobody was threatening to take her kids from her. When the shaking wouldn't stop, she opened her eyes and saw two of Rick standing over her. "Fuck off, Castle," she waved her hand at him.

"Kate, you need to wake up! It's below freezing in here. You're going to die if we don't get you warmed up."

"How did you find me?" Her voice was slurred. "I turned off my GPS."

"The rental car had GPS and you couldn't turn that one off. Get up! Now! We're going home."

"I'm not going anywhere with you," she rolled over with her back to him.

"Kate, get up! The kids are worried and scared. So is Lanie. What happened at lunch?"

"She took your side. Go away, Castle. The kids are better off without me. So are you."

"Rick," he heard Dr. Burke in the doorway. "Get her out of that bed. Drag her if that's what it takes."

Castle reached down and gathered Kate into his arms, well prepared when she began to fight him with everything that she had left in her still very drunk body. In the living room, the four men could hear her screaming and cursing at Castle, calling him every name in the book. "I hate you, Castle! Put me down! Let go of me! Please, Rick! I'm begging you! Please let me go!"

Castle took the five or six steps into the living room and placed Kate in the tattered armchair that her father loved. She opened her eyes and looked around her, taking in the sight of her father, her two surrogate brothers and her therapist. She covered her face in her hands and took a deep breath before removing her hands, leaving streaks of blood from her hand all over her cheeks and forehead. "What is this? A fucking intervention? Is there a tactical team waiting outside to taze me if I try to run? I'm not crazy! How many times do I have to tell you that, Castle?"

"Nobody said that you were crazy, Kate," Dr. Burke pulled a kitchen chair over and sat down across from her. "But you are troubled and you do need help. I have a friend of mine who specializes in postpartum conditions. I want to take you to see him tonight. Will you go?"

"I don't need any more doctors. I just need some time alone to get my head straight. Rick, you know how I do things. You know how I heal. Sometimes I just have to be alone."

"Kate, we can't leave you here alone. You didn't even start a fire when you got here. It's obvious that you can't take care of yourself."

"I'm drunk. I just want to sleep it off and when I wake up, I'll start a fire then. Please just let me go back to sleep."

"No, Kate," Dr. Burke's voice was as stern as Kate had ever heard him. "If you go back into that bedroom and go back to sleep, you're going to freeze to death. How will Rick explain that to Ariel and Jack?"

"It doesn't matter because he's not going to let me see them again, anyway. He's going to keep me away from my kids just like he kept Meredith away from Alexis."

"I never—" Castle started to argue, but Dr. Burke looked at him and shook his head.

"Kate, don't you want to get better so that you can take care of Hope? She's just a tiny baby who needs her mother."

"We all would've been better off without her."

"Do you really believe that?"

"I look at her and I don't even know her. Please, just let me go back to bed," she began to cry.

"Katie?" Jim walked over and sat on the edge of the armchair. "Katie, those babies need you. Rick needs you. We all love you and we want you to get some help. Do you really like feeling like this?"

"I don't know how to stop this, dad!"

"That's why we're here. To help you to stop it. Rick isn't trying to take your babies away from you, Katie. But if you don't get help, then he's going to. And I'll help him do it. I can't allow you to be around them when you're like this. And not only will you lose your babies, you'll also lose your job. You're going to lose everything, just like you told me that I was going to lose everything if I didn't stop drinking. Do you remember that?"

"You would help Rick instead of helping me?" Kate looked at her father with hatred written all over her face. "I'm your daughter! How can you betray me like this?"

"Katie, believe it or not, I am helping you. I'm helping you by not allowing you to put those three kids through any more torment."

"I need another drink," she started to get up, but Jim stopped her. "Let go of me!"

"No more alcohol, Katie," he motioned at the boys. Ryan picked the bottles up and took them into the kitchen, where he poured them down the drain. "You told me once that alcohol wasn't the answer. It didn't bring your mother back and it's not going to help you with the voices in your head and the visions of Josh that you keep seeing."

"Can we do this in the morning? I'm really tired and I really want to go back to sleep."

"No, Katie. We're doing this now; tonight. Will you come back to the city with us and allow Dr. Burke's colleague to help you?"

"Can I talk to Rick first?"

Jim looked at Castle, who nodded. "Yeah, you can speak to Rick. We'll wait out here."

Castle led Kate back into the master bedroom and closed the door. "You think that you're so fucking smart, don't you? Mister Big Shot Mystery Writer Man has all the answers!"

"I'm doing what I have to do to protect our children. I know that it's not your fault, Kate, but right now I absolutely despise you. So yeah," he removed a folded up piece of paper from his pocket, "Right now I'm the one with all of the answers."

"What're you going to tell our kids?"

"I don't know. I'm a writer," he said sarcastically. "I'm sure that I can come up with something that they'll believe."

"Are Kevin and Javi going to haul me out of here in cuffs if I refuse to go?"

"Nobody's arresting you, Kate. But, you're either doing this the easy way or the hard way. Whichever way you chose is entirely up to you."

"You have no idea how much I hate you right now."

"Oh, I've got a pretty good idea."

"I don't have a choice, do I?"

"No, you really don't."

"Do I have to ride back into town with you?"

"Kevin and Javi are taking your car back to the rental car place. You can ride back with them."

Kate turned on her heel and stomped back to the living room. "I'm going, only because I can't fight all of you."

"She's riding back with you," Castle told the boys. "The thought of riding in a vehicle with me is repugnant to her at the moment."

"What's that in your hand? A court order?" Kevin asked.

"No, it's the outline for my next book, but she doesn't need to know that. I'll see you at the airport."

"Kate, is it all right if I ride back with you and the detectives?" Burke asked.

"I don't care. Unlike me, you have choices."

"Let's get out of here," Castle opened the door and led all of them out into the freezing cold.

A/N #2: I started writing this chapter at 10 o'clock this morning. It is now 20 minutes until two in the afternoon. I love it when a chapter flows like this one did.

A/N #3: In the next chapter, we're going to meet Kate's new therapist, which will bring up a déjà vu moment from Season 4.

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