There is something that you should know about Pei's 'rules' before you read on. As you know, Pei is a very violent person. Therefore, most all of her rules were violent or psychologically painful. Playing soccer the Pei way would most surely get you killed-unless you have an absurd amount of Reiastu to waste on trying to stay alive in a game that resembled football with swords multiplied by one million. The rules were extremely simple; get the ball in the goal to score and anything goes except killing. It wouldn't have been half bad and even fun if played with humans. Unfortunately, Espada were not human, and Pei had given herself Shinigami powers. Just imagining the gore made her smile.
As Stark blew the whistle, Pei got the ball. She shunpoed at top speed down the court (she was currently playing center) to the other side. Yammy tried to steal the ball from her, sword drawn. Pei simply dodged and left Yammy to fall to the floor in super-slow motion from the force of charging full speed at Pei. The ball flew towards Nnoitra (Harribel's goalie)'s face at one billion miles per hour, ignoring the fact that Nnoitra did not like to be hit by soccer balls flying at him at one billion miles per hour.
The first injury was Nnoitra's broken nose. Nnoitra glared at Pei, who was still wearing her customary high heeled boots. If a little brat like her could kick ass in high heels, then so could he. He snuck up behind her with an oversized sock and attempted to stuff her in it. Pei allowed him to get the sock right above her head before leaping on his back and karate chopping his pressure points, causing the poor spoon to lurch every other second.
The game of suicide style soccer paused momentarily to watch the tall spoon get beat up by a five foot three girl before returning at full force. Nnoitra, who was paying more attention to the surroundings than Pei managed to dodge the green Cero from Ulquiorra, who had been trying to steal the ball from Harribel. Pei, however, was too preoccupied in poking the spoons pressure points to notice. She took the full blast to her face, completely ruining her usually immaculate appearance. An outraged Pei flew out of the smoke, attacking all with wild kicks and punches, no longer caring if she was hurting her team. When she finally calmed down, Szayel was in possession of the small ball that had caused so much blood. Her red, knee length kimono ruined, and her shoulder length hair singed, Pei fumed like any other twelve year old with temper issues. She flung herself at Szayel, knocking him to the ground before dribbling the soccer ball down to the goal and passing to Zommari.
With the game now 3 to 1, Pei was concentrating too much on how to make up for the two points to notice the entire Harribel team sneaking up on her. They proceeded to stuff her into the oversized sock that Nnoitra had been attempting to do the same with. Pei was furious. No one, she repeated, no one, got away with stuffing her in a smelly old sock that was made for Godzilla. Did she mention that the sock was pink? Pink was absolutely the worst color in existence, and that only added to Pei's already erupting temper. She raised her impressive Reiastu to one quarter strength, knowing that would be more than sufficient to blow five feet radius up. However, to her growing horror, the bag suppressed Reiastu. Well, she did say that anything would go. What would her team do without their most violent player? Then, she realized that she could just pull out Akane Ayumu and saw her way meticulously out, a task she was not looking forward to performing.
Once out, Pei released full Reiastu, glaring murderously at all the Espada. Stark shifted in his sleep as if realizing that a murderous demon was out to get them all. Then, coming up with an even better plan, Pei waited patiently, going along with the soccer game and slashing many with Akane Ayumu in the process. Soon, very soon, Hueco Mundo would self destruct. She couldn't wait until then.
That evening, Gin went to his room to find a letter on his drawer. He scanned the flowing script hungrily, nodding and smirking. Yes, that would be fun. It was time to prank Hueco Mundo into Hell.
A/N: I'm gonna break my own rule about the Caps Lock. YOU PEOPLE AREN'T REVIEWING! WHY AREN'T YOU REVIEWING? I'M SAD! Oh yeah, it's the Christmas Holiday from school. A lot of you are on vacation. I'm gonna go to Mexico…swimming, scuba diving. What's not to look forward to? Oh, by the way, Demon-Pixie's coming too so we won't be back for a long while cause my favorite older cousins invited us to this five star hotel. They sent us a picture too…so pretty with a pool in the back. See y'all when we get back January 15th!
-The Eville Pie
We're leaving *checks clock* for the airport in twenty minutes. I need to do some last minute packing because well I'm traveling with Pie. She can't be trusted. There was this time she put a toad in my luggage. And this other time it was a bunch of worms. You get the point. I am not looking forward to time switch. Oh, her cousins' are already here! I need to go say hi!
-Demon-Pixie
Parody Thingy:
Ichigo: So you demons are leaving for a while.
Pei: Yes, but in the story, I'm still trapped here so in reality you guys won't be tortured in a while but actually, the time of the story will just freeze until we get back.
Ichigo: Huh?
Demon-Pixie: Too complicated for you to comprehend?
Pei: Nah, don't even bother. He won't be able to understand the genius minds of us if he can't understand a beetle's.
Ichigo: WHAT?
Pei: Once again, I shall have to be a hypocrite and kill you for talking in Caps Lock. Burn them all-eh? Where did that bastard go?
Ichigo had run away. We the miserable Espada apologize for inconveniences and beg you to spare us the misery of staying longer with Pei even if time freezes for the story world.
