Trigger warning for drugs and abuse.

Nico decided to go to an NA meeting and admits a few secrets infront of his crush Will.

review at will. I own nothing!

Nico was in one of his moods. Ignoring everyone and keeping to his cabin like the hermit he was. Will hated it when Nico was like this. Sunshine didn't understand though. Will didn't know what it was like to feel like your drowning every time you force yourself into a social situation. Will didn't know what it was like hearing every noise going on at the same time to the point where you can't think! People chewing leaves rustling laughter screaming smacking of lips clinking of forks everything all at once in your ears making it impossible to focus on just staying normal. Every demigod has ADHD but none of them seemed to have issues like Nico did.

All the kids were scared of him anyway it was better him holing up in his cabin doing things that needed to be done. Research of burial rights and didn't other ventures in the books his father would send him. Nico didn't know why his dad kept sending him the books but he figured it was stuff he had to learn. Maybe his dad was giving him a job in the future. That was also a far fetched thought. How could his father trust him with anything? He barely trusted himself. Nightmares of his time in Tartarus plagued his dreams keeping him awake for days at a time.

The things he experienced down there were to much for one person even him. Nicks and cuts littered Nicos ravaged body. Not smooth like the rest of the campers. Some of them he did but most were from fighting. No one would understand why he would do it to himself. Just like they wouldn't understand everything else he had done. It's better that no one really knew him that personally. If they were scared of him now they would exile him from camp if they knew the things he resorted to being in his own for 4 years. You grow up a lot when your on your own. If it wasn't for his father he would be dead by now.

"Nico ?"

Cut from his spiraling reverie Will had found him.

"Hey! What are you doing here?"

"Thought I'd check on you and give you a calendar for the summer events"

"I'm not the bonfire sing a long capture the flag type Sunshine though I appreciate your effort"

" Oh not those I'm talking about the groups that meet through the week"

"Groups what groups"

" My cabin and I do different groups through the week. I do NA and Austin does a grief group for kids who have lost family and friends. Kayla does AA and Cecil does a group for PTSD"

"What? I don't even know what most of those are?"

" Oh well NA is for drug users AA is for alcohol and PTSD is for kids with traumas in the past. Rape and violence in their life"

"Wow must be some empty rooms" Nico chuckled.

"Um actually we are full up most of the time. The NA I run is done at the beach since we need so much room for everyone. "

"Why do you run the NA group?"

"Because I was hooked on a few things myself back in the day. My mom is a famous country singer and drugs were always around so I picked up a bad habit or two. That's why I chose to be a year rounder here. Keeps me clean of I'm not exposed I'm about 3 years clean"

"Never took you the type that would even touch the stuff"

"Why not? We all medicate Nico. With the lives of demigods it's almost impossible not too. Kaylas dad was a huge alcoholic. Austin lost his mom to an overdose and she died in his arms. Cecil was being attacked by his step father. We all grew up with problems and drugs and alcohol and sex are just ways we end up coping with things. "

"I'll think about it"

"That's all I ask"

Will left him with the schedule. Nico himself could go to all of these groups. That would mean admitting to his issues. He wasn't about to do that no matter how hard Sunshine pressed. Throwing the flyer away he headed to his kitchen to make lunch when his father appeared at the kitchen table with the flyer in his hands.

"Father" he bowed slightly.

"Son"

"What can I do for you? Run away spirit? Need me to feed Cerberus while you and Wifey go on a get away?"

Nico took out two root beers out of the fridge and poured them for him and his father. Passing a glass to Hades he sat and waited for the reason he decided to visit.

"So... that Apollo boy seems nice"

"Yeah he's ok. The only one not cowering away from me. Shows up every day I swear I think I see him more than my own reflection."

"You like him don't you?"

"Dad I'm not ready to date and he's.. cute yes but he's straight"

"Actually he's not I've talked to his father since you two have been spending all this time together"

"You spying on me and vetting my friends?"

"Yes and frankly I'm glad your making better choices"

"Hmph"

"Yeah well I think you need to think about attending atleast one of these groups. Perhaps the one the Apollo boy runs himself?"

"Dad no I can't I don't want people knowing about that."

"Your not the only one that has been through this obviously I don't see why you can atleast attempt to go."

"I'm sober now. I've been sober over 7 months."

"Yes and I know that you haven't been feeling the best about yourself. I don't want you to back slide. I think this could be good for you "

Nico sat in silence looking at his father. The man had the same eyes as him. Nico wasn't scared of his father the way other kids were scared of his father. Or hell even their own godly parent. Hades was right though. Nico had been craving it lately. The need for a release. The need to let go.

"I'll think about it"

"How about you go and I'll sweeten the deal"

"How?"

"New set of Stygian throwing knives and I start giving you an allowance?"

"Your bribing me to go to meetings?"

"Yes. Go to one meeting a week and I'll give you this"

A black Amex appeared in Hades hand.

"Seriously? Why would you trust this? Why would you trust me to do this?"

"Because deep down you want help son. I know that. I know you. That and I don't know how else to get you to go. If you don't go or stop going you will find that this card goes missing"

"Ok I'll do one meeting. I want the knives though. We can talk about the card if I decide to continue"

"Deal"

The knives appeared on the table on a cloud of smoke. His father disappeared in the same breath. Guess he was going to see what Will stupid ass group was about. Probably a bunch of Whiney kids that smoked a few joints or got hooked on caffeine pills to stay awake and study.

I walked down the beach to see a low bonfire and about 30 campers sat around it. Wow so many people. There was no way all these kids had drug problems. Sitting in a chair in the back Will stood up to take everyone's attention.

"Hello everyone I'm Will and I'm an addict!"

"Hello Will!" The crowd chanted together.

"I'm happy to see all of your today! I see some knew people here which is great and lots of old faces! Well let's get things started I'm going to talk about cravings today. I had a craving today in the infirmary. I was giving some morphine to an Ares kid who ripped his pinky finger off during sword practice. While I was giving it to him I thought about how easy it would be for me the head healer to take some myself. To mark down that I gave him two doses instead of one. People trust me. They wouldn't even question what my paper work says. But then I thought there was a reason people trusted my paperwork. It's because I don't do that and I want people to trust me. It was hard after the battle of Manhattan. I used a lot of pain killers that my mom would just leave lying around. She never noticed they were gone. She didn't need them she just had them. I want to be a doctor one day. That starts here. That starts with me being able to be stronger than this. To be stronger than me wanting everything to float away. "

Everyone clapped. Including myself. Wow sunshine liked hillbilly heroine. Who would have thought.

"Ok let's have our new faces share a bit with us tonight. Ok I see you there come up and tell us about yourself."

Drew Tanaka went up to the front infront of the fire.

"Hi I'm drew "

"Hello drew" Everyone chanted in unison.

"I was hooked on cocain for a really long time. I have trouble with my weight and I thought if I just did a little here and there it wouldn't be a issue. I would lose a few pounds and it made me feel more interesting. I felt like people liked talking to me thought I was fun. Turns out that was all in my head most people just thought I was annoying when I was on it. I lost those few pounds and then some. I did it so much that I finally stopped when my nose wouldn't stop bleeding. I was so scared I was losing so much blood I almost passed out. I've been clean for about two months now but what Will said about the cravings is true. I felt it when I stepped on the scale and gained 7 pounds. I wanted so bad to go back to it. I still want to go back to it. My craving isn't over. But so far I'm ok. "

She went back to her seat as everyone applauded her.

"You sir in the back please come up and share!" Will shouted at Nico.

I thought he would pass out. Feeling the creeping heat prickle in my ears I started to slump in my chair. A voice sounded in my mind. My fathers voice. " GO!"

I stood up and made his way toward the front.

"Hi I'm Nico"

"Hello Nico!" Once again in unison.

This was it. Here it goes. They will all defiantly hate me after this. Might as well get it over with so I can rub it in his stupid dad's face when he was proved right.

" I'm nico and I'm an addict. 7 months ago my father found me alone in an abandoned building with a needle sticking of my arm. I sold my body for drugs. I know that sounds insane. Especially at my age but my mother died. I was forced into a casino that suspended time so I'm actually in my 80s. My sister died. She was the only family I had for my entire life. The hunters stole her away and then death did. She left me twice. I had no home. No family. I didn't want to be here anymore. I didn't want to be in my body anymore. I'm gay. I was born in a time where that meant being killed or locked away. I struggled with that a lot. I found out that it's not like that anymore. Well it's atleast much more accepted and it's no longer looked at as a mental problem.

I battled with that while going down my rabbit hole. I didn't have any money so my body was all I had to give drug dealers. I was lucky. My dad found me. He brought me to his home in the underworld and gave me a room. Detoxed me. Helped me get through my addiction safely. I was checked out while down there I was lucky I didn't catch any diseases from either the needles or the other thing. I knew a few that were not quite as lucky. I still want to. It never really goes away for me. But I'm trying. I'm 7 months sober. I can't promise that it won't happen again. But I'm trying."

I walked back to my seat as I heard the applause. People looked me in the eye as I walked by and reached out and touched my shoulder. Everyone seemed ok with what I just said.

I heard a few more stories. Surprisingly not much different from my own. I never thought so many of us went through this! I went from feeling so alone to seeing these kids tell their stories and they had an idea of what it was like. I wasn't the only one who sold my body I wasn't the only one who felt alone. I wasn't the only one who spent years in solitude with no where to go.

The rest of the meeting passed in a blur. They all ended up holding hands in a circle chanting something he hadn't learned yet so he just listened. As they dispersed people came to me clapping my shoulder and thanking me for my story. A feeling of acceptance washed over me. Maybe my dad was right. I would never admit that of course. As much as Hades was right I would rather have my father think I would be attending the meetings for access to the black Amex. Walking back to my cabin Will Solace put his arm around me as he walked. As much as I wanted to shove it off the weight felt nice and contact with Will made my stomach jump with butterflies.

"So you and I are in the same boat I guess"

"Yeah guess so"

"Well that's kind of a relief honestly. It's hard to date someone who doesn't know what it's like"

"Date?!"

"Yeah I want to ask you out. You and me dinner and a movie type stuff"

"I didn't know you were..." Nico slyly lied knowing full well what his dad had mentioned.

"I am and it took real guts to admit all that up there. I was going back and forth on the idea of asking you out because I wasn't sure if you were but now that I know I'd love you take you out"

"I-I guess that would be fine."

They stopped at the Hades cabin door.

"Hey Nico can I ask you a question that's super uncomfortable?"

"Well we just left an entire group of uncomfortable so sure go for it!"

"Did they ever kiss you?"

"Who?"

"You know.. the people you got your fix from"

"Oh uh no that's not really the way it works. Honestly I'm kind of surprised you want to go out after hearing that."

"Your past is your past and now is now. Don't let it define you. It was awful that it happened to you like that but I'm glad your in a place where that's no longer your current reality"

"That was convoluted Solace."

"Yeah I get that way when I'm nervous"

"Why are you nervous still i agreed?"

"Cause of this"

Leaning forward I felt Wills lips against mine. Soft and warm. His hands cupping my face like it was made of glass. Like I was something precious to hold. I deepened the kiss even though I had no clue what I was doing. Pulling wills waist to me by his belt loops. Will smelled amazing and tasted like oranges and lavender. I had never felt this. Over and over I sold my body to strangers but none of them really wanted me. Will wanted me. The feeling of that was enough to wash away those shameful memories even if it was just for a moment. Breaking apart for air I looked into the blue orbs that were Wills eyes.

Getting lost in them was easy. They were trustworthy and sincere. Despite him hearing the awful things he has done Will wanted to kiss him. To take him on a date.

"Wow that.. that was "

"That was my first kiss.." Nico squeeked out.

"Mine as well..."

"Well uh I guess I'll see you for the date?"

"Oh yeah um tomorrow night 7pm"

"Ok I'll have bells on"

"What?"

"Don't ask it's an old saying"

"It's cute. Bye Neeks" and he kissed me chastely stumbling away from my cabin.

I went inside and jumped on my bed and screamed into my pillow.