Chapter eleven.

Bella's POV

My phone had bleeped a couple of times. I knew it was probably from my parents. The sun had set long before and the stars had already appeared, shining brightly.

I had no idea what time it was, and didn't want to know.

I wanted one thing.

To be held.

I needed to be comforted. But my comforter didn't want me anymore. He lusted me, but that was only going to be temporarily. Then he would move on. Because that was what Edward did. But I needed him. To hold me. To wipe my tears. We were friends, weren't we? Friends held eachother. They looked out for eachother. And they didn't dump eachother.

So I couldn't have him. Not as a lover, because that would last a while, then I'd be forgotten.

"Bella…? Bella?"

A voice of an angel called my name. I looked up from the safe comfort of my knees. I was sitting on the bench in Jubilee Park. It was deserted but a refuge. Not warm and welcoming.

But a refuge nevertheless.

The fact that I didn't have a jacket on me made me shiver and curl up into a ball.

I startled when something warm had gripped my shoulders. I turned around to see Edward staring down at him. I pulled away immediately.

"I've been looking everywhere for you", he gasped, he sounded almost angry but partly relieved, "it's late, Bella. Shouldn't you be home?"

I opened my mouth to say something but no such sounds came out.

"Look, I'm sorry about what happened at my flat", he carried on. Edward sighed and sat next to me, "I guess I thought you felt the same way."

"Felt what?" I asked. My voice sounded cold, icy.

"I…I love you Bella", whispered Edward. His words danced in circles in the wind. "I always have. You're the person I wake up for in the morning. The person I long to see everyday. That kiss that we shared…it was the best, don't tell me you didn't feel it."

"Y…you c…can't say s…stuff like t…that", I told him. My teeth were chattering and Edward seemed to have noticed. He pulled off his coat and wrapped it around me. The warmth made me sigh.

"Thanks", I murmured.

"Let's go to my car, we can talk there. It'll be warmer", said Edward. I stood up and he wrapped an arm around me. For those two minutes, as we walked out of the park, I almost felt better. I felt like even though we were just friends, we were here for eachother. Most of all, he was here for me. Because I needed him to be. He was holding me when I needed to be held, he was my refuge.

Edward held open the passenger door for me. I entered and sat down. He was inside the car on the other side in no time.

"Ok, let's talk", he proposed. I looked at him. The same beautiful pale features I had seen ever since I met him. The gorgeous bronze hair with a hint of red. The piercing green eyes, dazzling and hypnotic. His godlike features only got better.

"There's nothing to talk about", I said staring at the dashboard, "we shouldn't have kissed Edward. We're friends. We got caught up in the moment, and it accidentally happened. Now we can go back to normal and pretend it didn't happen, because we're friends and we can't be anything more."

"Why not?" he demanded, clearly mad now.

"We just can't", I snapped. More tears were building up. How do you tell the person you love, that you can't love them? How do you explain that you have been hurt too much to be hurt again? How do you say 'I love you' whilst saying 'we're just friends'?

"You're the only person who cares about me Edward and damn it you can't push me away", I said angrily, "I don't care if you love me, I love you too but I can't risk myself for 2 minutes of love! I need you here for me, and you're going to be here. I need to be held and you're going to hold me, if that means we have to stay friends then we're staying bloody friends!"

I huffed and turned to face the window. I couldn't hold back the tears because they were already flooding down. My throat was dry and my lips wobbled.

"Bella…"

I bit my lip and closed my eyes.

"Bella?"

Just friends. He has to keep me. I need him here. He has to keep me. I can't get hurt.

He can't dump me. He can't chuck me. Just friends. We're just friends…

"Bella! Damn it, look at me", snapped Edward. Unwillingly I turned to look at him. He looked frustrated at first but he immediately softened his expression and smiled sadly.

"Were you listening to anything I said, Bella?" he asked staring at me straight in the face. I couldn't tear away from his gaze.

"Of course I was listening. I heard everything you said, Edward. That's why –"

"No", he interjected, "you heard what I said, but you weren't listening."

"What's your point?" I snapped impatiently. Didn't he know how much I was hurting? Didn't he know I wanted to be held? By a friend.

"I said I love you", said Edward, "not your body. Not for 2 minutes of love. I love you. I said I always did. I didn't just start. I didn't just suddenly realise that I wanted to have sex with you, because you were a random girl. I realised that I wanted you. That I loved having you around. That I loved being with you. Bella, you are my life now. Don't you get that Bella? Don't you understand what I'm saying?"

His full gaze made me feel rather faint. Those bright piercing eyes, hypnotic and dazzling. The words he had just said were sinking in. slowly, but definitely sinking. My heart was beating quite loudly, thrashing against my rib cage.

I tore away him Edward and closed my eyes.

My phone suddenly rang interrupting the peaceful silence in Edward's car.

Without checking the caller ID I picked it up.

And got the shock of my life.

"Isabella swan, you are in so much trouble", said James' taunting voice.


He loves her. She loves him. James interrupts...

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xXx