The baby was on time, as if he knew that his other mother was a stickler for punctuality. Henry George Bering-Wells was a red-faced, squalling mess. Helena had carried him for nine months, so she was already in love with him. Myka, however, looked at his squishy face a little doubtfully at first, wrinkling her nose as he started crying, and trying to let her panic at Helena's painful birth melt away. But the look on Helena's face when she began to nurse him for the first time literally took Myka's breath away, (Steve had to remind her to breathe when she started to get faint) and just like that she was in love with him as much as she was in love with Helena. Both Claudia and Steve were there, taking pictures that Helena swore they were going to delete or she would kill them, but Myka knew she would mellow and allow them to keep even the embarrassing ones.
"The little dude really looks like you, HG." Claudia smiled as she held the aforementioned little dude, giggling when he grabbed her pinkie in his fat red fist.
"That's probably just as well, because if he looked like his father, Myka would probably divorce me, and we've only been married for a month." Helena laughed at the horrified looks on Steve and Claudia's faces. She and Myka had come to terms with what had happened, and Helena had recently begun to make their friends uncomfortable by saying outrageous things about it. Myka gave her a mock glare. But she couldn't maintain it, it slipped into a goofy grin almost straight away. Steve and Claudia groaned at the look on her face, and the adoration on Helena's.
"You guys are so in love, it makes me want to vomit, seriously!" Steve was making puking gestures.
"Yeah, like you and Liam aren't madly in love." Myka mocked. "It's just sex, really, we're not that into each other," she mimicked. "Is that why I saw you looking at rings the other day?"
Claudia gasped. "Are you fucking serious? You guys are getting married? I can't believe you didn't tell me, Jinksy!" she squealed.
"No, we're not getting married. It's just that these two goofy lesbians made me think about how much I like him, and now I can't stop looking at rings and tuxes. I blame you two, with your perfect Manhattan wedding and your gorgeous baby." He said, turning to Helena and Myka. "It's not fair to impose all that perfection on the rest of us, you know."
Helena and Myka just grinned at each other, and Myka leaned over to kiss Helena softly. At least at first, but Helena bit her bottom lip, and then they were totally making out, and Steve and Claudia were groaning in the background theatrically.
"You are a very bad girl, Mrs Bering-Wells..." Myka said, touching her bottom lip where Helena's teeth had sunk in. Helena just grinned again, wolfishly.
"Barf!" Claudia screeched, and deposited Henry G on Helena's chest, as she and Steve went to call everyone they knew to get them to come to the hospital.
Helena took two weeks off to bond with Henry, and to heal from what was a painful birth. Myka was worried sick about her, but the producers had insisted that she return to work. Her shooting schedule was punishing, and she sometimes didn't get home until dawn. She missed Helena so badly, and it seemed like every time she came home, Henry looked like a different kid. She was also exhausted, her leg hurting worse than it had in years. Thankfully, they were almost finished shooting season one of the show, and Helena only had a few days of shooting when she went back before they wrapped.
"Can we please have a vacation after this, honey?" she begged Helena, one morning when she had just crept in after a scene that they must have shot a thousand times, which involved dancing and singing along with one of their recorded tracks along with most of the supporting cast. Her toes on one foot were bleeding, and her other leg was the one that the cancer had attacked, which currently felt like it was made of molten lead. She felt like cutting them both off, and had taken all the pain medication she could get her hands on before flopping down onto the bed next to Helena. The sun was coming up, and Helena was snuggled up in the foetal position, her body tiny under the covers, her hair messy and her face lined from the pillow. She was stunning. She was also more than half asleep, but she murmured that of course they could go on holiday, before closing her eyes and beginning to snore softly. Myka rolled her eyes, and took the opportunity to wrap herself around her snoring wife and get the sleep she'd been denied by the sadistic director.
Helena had been sleepy when she said it, but apparently she took Myka's request seriously, because she hired a nanny a few days later and booked a two week holiday in Hawaii for all four of them. She invited Steve and Claudia too, but they weren't able to make it for the first week, so they said they'd get back to her about joining them for the second week. Myka was pleased that Helena chose a gay guy for their nanny. At least there would never be any suspicion of infidelity there. She had forgiven Helena, but it was just sensible not to have any possible confusion. The nanny would be a big part of their lives, given that they were both in the middle of busy, successful careers. His name was Aaron. He was short for a guy, with dark hair and brown eyes, and he was amazing with Henry.
After the last few days of shooting were finally completed, and the riotous wrap party attended, they were on their way to Oahu. They soaked up sun, drank cocktails (alcohol-free for Helena, who was still breast-feeding) and explored the island together. Sometimes they took Henry with them, and sometimes they left him with Aaron at the hotel, depending on what their plans were for the day. It was a honeymoon for them, and a real relief to be free from the demands of the stage or shooting schedules, and the stresses of cancer and infidelity. They both felt an intense relief at being away from all that had pulled them apart, and they took the time to come back to one another and enjoy their first vacation as a married couple.
One morning Helena was lying on a sun lounger wearing a red bikini. Her face was red from the sun, and she had grown approximately a million more freckles overnight, it seemed. Myka couldn't take her eyes off her wife. She herself was lounging around in shorts and a tank top. She wasn't as confident with her body as Helena was. But Helena really had reason to be confident. Even now, a month after giving birth, her body was incredible. And since she was nursing – her boobs?! Wow. Myka entertained herself by imagining Pete's expression at seeing Helena right at that moment.
"Are you drooling, my dear wife?" Helena smirked, lifting her sunglasses to more effectively mock a now-stammering Myka.
"You know what that damn bikini does to me, Helena. It's all I can do not to jump on you..." Myka was whispering, her voice almost strangled as she tried to keep anyone nearby from hearing.
Helena smiled smugly and said, "Tough luck, Mrs Bering-Wells. You'll just have to wait until I've finished sunbathing." And she put her sunglasses back on, before gesturing imperiously at Myka to rub suntan lotion into her skin. Myka sighed theatrically and gave in, but she made sure to tickle Helena mercilessly while putting on the lotion in retaliation for her teasing.
Claudia and Steve were able to join them for part of the second week, and they had a fantastic time exploring during the day and eating and drinking together in the evenings. Myka felt like she laughed more during that week than she had that entire year. Claudia and Steve were able to entertain themselves when Helena and Myka preferred to be alone – which was a lot of the time, really, but they enjoyed their friends' company enough that they curbed their enthusiasm for one another enough to spend time with their friends. And then there was Henry. The little dude, as Claudia called him, was a constant joy to them both – all four of them, in fact, and it seemed that Aaron was a little bit in love with his tiny charge too. Everything he did was so cute that they were all transfixed. Myka was a little sickened by how gooey she felt every time she looked at her son. She'd promised herself that she wouldn't be one of those parents that talked about their kid all the time, and took pictures of every damn thing they did – but she very much feared that she was turning into the very thing she had previously abhorred. And she didn't care, not one jot. The joy he brought to her, and to Helena, was worth any amount of embarrassment about her own goofiness. He was a gift. What should have destroyed them had instead brought them together. Claudia remarked to Steve one evening when they had retreated back to their hotel room, "You know, they've always had that energy around them, those two, that made you feel like you were intruding, even when they were just in the same room with one another. But now, with the little dude, they're a family, and I hate to interrupt them. They're so happy, it's like they're luminous. It should make me wanna barf, but I kind of want what they have." Steve hugged her. "I know what you mean. I like Liam a lot, I think I love him in fact, but I have never felt anything like what those two feel for each other and HG Junior. I'm starting to yearn." He pulled his 'Chandler Bing' face, Claudia laughed, and they lay on the bed together holding hands for a long time after.
Reality was beckoning, and they all packed up and returned to New York at the end of a perfect two weeks. Myka and Helena were indeed glowing. Being married was new and wondrous, and Helena's eyes kept returning to Myka's left hand, where a wedding band and engagement ring were nestled together snugly. Helena was still terrified. When Christina was born, she had been alone. Marcus had abandoned her with an alacrity that shouldn't have surprised her, in retrospect, but it had hurt her intensely at the time. She had brought her daughter up mostly alone, until her life had been shattered by the explosion. This – her family – was a thing of incredible wonder. That Myka was still even here after what Helena had done was incredible to her. That they had a son, a son that they both adored – it was practically incomprehensible. Helena knew that she was under the influence of hormones, but the flood of love that she felt every time she looked at her son still shocked her. And watching Myka with him almost stopped her heart. Her wife was so beautiful and so loving. She had everything she could ever want, everything she hadn't even known she wanted, and she was so frightened of losing it all. She made a conscious choice, every time she looked at Myka or HG Junior (as Pete insisted on calling him), that she would hope, and not fear. She hoped that in time it would become instinctive, but for now she would keep working on it.
Myka, too, was terrified by how she felt. The betrayal that she felt when she found out Helena was pregnant was still fresh, still a gnawing worry that lingered in the back of her mind. But she, too, chose to hope. She and Helena had managed to hold on to one another despite everything that life had thrown at them – and that they had thrown at each other – and she believed that Henry was their reward. Helena was a natural mother, and her joy in motherhood was wonderful to behold. Myka chose, every day, to live in hope.
The next few months were a whirlwind. Henry was a wonderful baby, but he was still a baby, and they were both sleep deprived and crabby. Myka was working on an off-Broadway play to fill in the time until the second season of Smash started filming. They were beginning to be recognised, both of them, and it was causing unexpected complications. Namely, that the network executives wanted them to pretend that they weren't a couple, to maintain the illusion of them both being hot and available heterosexual ladies, they supposed. How Myka and Helena were supposed to maintain that illusion despite their marriage being a matter of public record, and Helena's very public proposal which was on YouTube, the network didn't say. Myka was mad, but Helena was practically incandescent with rage. And hormones, probably. But a few meetings later, someone came up with the genius idea that people might like the idea that the two leading ladies were in fact married to one another. That women can like women seemed to be a revolutionary idea to some of the dinosaurs at the television network, but from the chatter that had inevitably sprung up on fan pages for the show, it appeared that those who were aware of Helena and Myka's relationship were in fact very positive about it. Too enthusiastically positive, in some cases, but such was life when one was in the public eye. They tentatively agreed that they would not volunteer information about their private lives when interviewed, but it was agreed that if they were asked directly, they could be honest.
There were also legal matters that needed to be attended to. Helena was fairly sure that either Dr Boone or Sam Martino was Henry's biological father. However, to ensure that she and Myka were not challenged at any point for custody of their son, they contacted both potential candidates through their lawyers to ask them to take a DNA test. It wasn't easy for Myka to deal with this reminder of Helena's betrayal. There were more than a few tears, some doors were slammed, and harsh words were exchanged. But after several sessions with Dr Frederic, and a lot of cuddling of young Henry, things became less fraught between them.
Dr Nate Boone was the father. He was no longer Myka's oncologist, of course, but he was Henry's biological father, it appeared. He was very happy to sign all manner of legal documents confirming that he relinquished all parental rights over their son. The lawyers had not mentioned what had led him to that decision, but the fact that he could potentially lose his medical license and his wife due to his unprofessional behaviour and his infidelity probably entered into it, Myka reasoned. She hated him, hated that he had slept with her Helena, touched her...but he had done the right thing, at least, and had cleared the way for Myka to adopt Henry formally. Which she did, before Henry was three months old. The love and joy in Helena's eyes as Myka signed the paperwork went a long way towards making up for Nate. And his eyebrows. (No, that wasn't true – nothing excused those eyebrows.)
The second season of the show began filming, and they were both working almost flat out for days at a time. They didn't get to see their son nearly enough. Helena was distraught at times, feeling that she was a horrible mother because she wasn't with Henry enough. Myka got her through those moments, reassuring her that she was a wonderful mother. Henry was surrounded by people who loved him, and by colour and music. Aaron spent a lot of time with them on set, making sure that Henry saw his mothers as much as possible. Their lives really were quite frantic, however. The show was popular and they were very much in demand, and were requested to appear on a number of chat shows. They managed to keep their relationship out of those interviews, but Helena couldn't resist a frank discussion with a well-known lesbian TV host after their interview. She was lovely about the whole thing, sympathetic and understanding about the pressure the network executives were exerting.
They had a few weeks off after the first half of the show was completed. They were exhausted, wrung out, and decided that they would get out of New York for a while. Helena was, for some reason, homesick for London, so they went to England for a week, Henry and Aaron in tow, to visit some of her old friends from school and college. They had a quiet but wonderful time. Helena was surprised and pleased that so many of her old friends remembered her and had been watching her career with interest. A young man called William Wolcott was particularly warm and kind. He had tried to help Helena after Christina's death, but had been rebuffed so many times that he gave up. He was genuinely delighted to see her so well and happy. They had several happy days of sightseeing and evenings spent talking and laughing with Helena's old friends at the local pubs. Myka loved London, and loved Bromley, where Helena was from.
Then the tabloids got wind of their presence – and pictures of them holding hands, kissing and walking with their son around London appeared in several newspapers. The network called them back to New York immediately. Helena was furious with the summons.
"We told them that we weren't going to pretend, Myka. Where do they get off telling us what to bloody do? As if we can't play straight women on stage or on screen because we're together in real life?" She blustered and shouted, but she calmed down eventually as Myka knew she would. Myka didn't have any intention of allowing the network to steamroll them into lying about their relationship either, but she preferred to wait until they got back home and heard what they had to say before reacting.
What 'they' had to say was not pleasant. The man who appeared to be in charge, who reminded Myka of Giles from Buffy, was harsh and uncomplimentary about the pictures that had been widely publicised in the UK and then the States. He was alleging that they had somehow breached their contracts by appearing in public together with Henry, and that their relationship should have been kept behind closed doors. After one sneer too many, Helena predictably lost her temper. Myka's blood pressure was soaring too, so she didn't even make any attempt to rein her wife in. This little twerp deserved everything he got.
After a fruitless argument, however, Myka stood up quietly, taking Helena's hand in hers.
"I am sorry, gentlemen, that you are unhappy that my wife and I were photographed together with our son while we were on holiday. As far as I understand it, we are not contractually obliged to maintain the illusion that we are either heterosexual or available, whether that be for your benefit or for that of the audience. If I am mistaken about that, you can feel free to let us know through our legal representatives. I would like to make one thing very clear to you all, however. Neither I nor Helena are ashamed in any way of who we are, or of our relationship – or of our son. We will not allow you to subject us to another one of these meetings, not ever again. I will happily discuss strategies for dealing with the media attention we have inadvertently attracted. But should anyone from the network or the production company mention this matter again in the rude and appalling way that this man has today," she pointed at faux-Giles, "then you will be hearing from our lawyers. Have I made myself clear?"
There were stunned nods from all present, even Helena, who was looking at Myka with wide eyes. Myka led Helena from the room, her head held high and her eyes challenging anyone at that table to dare to open their mouth. No-one did.
"I very much want to take you home and ravish you right now, Myka Bering-Wells," Helena whispered in her ear after they left the network office. Myka did not object.
The furore died down soon after. They appeared on that same chat show again, this time as a couple, and they were heartened by the content of some of the fan mail they received thereafter. Not all of it, of course. Helena was particularly disturbed when her assistant showed her a pair of women's panties that had come in the mail.
"They're sending me bloody knickers, Myka. What the hell?!"
Myka tried not to laugh, she really did. But when Helena said "knickers" she doubled over, trying extremely hard not to wet her own knickers. Helena's assistant fled in terror at Helena's expression. Helena, however, stopped glaring when Myka started whispering in her ear about what she'd like to do with Helena's knickers.
The show was not renewed for a third season. They were upset, but not surprised. Offers began to flood in for a variety of guest star roles on television, and even film, but they both decided to return to what they loved, which of course was Broadway. Acting was all very well, but as Myka often said, what was the point if nobody burst into song?
