SPOV

Sheldon quickly dove down through the levels of consciousness in order to achieve the deepest level of Kholinar. Quiescent though his body may have appeared, Sheldon's internal dialogue and correlation of algorithms and theorems had only submerged into a theta state where he could digest and assimilate the barrage of unanticipated events that had recently plagued him. Though most of his great intellect was focused inward, there was still part of his awareness that kept tabs on his surroundings. Several times, since his Meemaw had dosed him with her "Tea" he roused enough, while still not becoming conscious; Sheldon was quite able to note the comings and goings of his Meemaw, Penny, and even twice by Dr. Gablehauser. He was aware when the plane landed and when he was moved from plane to a waiting SUV to another warm bed. His trust in his Meemaw and Penny afforded him the time and quiet he needed to compose himself mentally as well as physically.

When Penny had come back to take Koothrapali and himself to the waiting plane, she had not tucked herself under his arm as she had done upon first seeing him. The friendly air that floated about her encompassed all around and yet she seemed more reserved. She squeezed his mittened hand in her gloved one; she didn't make eye contact like she had in his room earlier. These mixed signals on his already taxed psyche had him near to cracking, that being so, he couldn't fathom why he wasn't more reactive.

Upon reaching the jet his relief was evident to all when he swept his Meemaw up in a bear hug. The same loving eyes and soothing voice that had comforted and defended him as a child from family and foes stood fast for him now.

Meemaw had been the one to observe that his intellect was vastly higher than his siblings and pushed for his testing. When Sheldon had blown through the most grueling of intellectual tests, the doctors had had to confess that they possessed no examination to accurately measure Sheldon's IQ. It was Meemaw that pushed for the superior education that he would need to reach his full potential and then found the funding to afford it. Whenever he doubted, she set him straight; whenever he was unsure of his next step, she lovingly enlightened him with questions he already knew the answers too. Never once had she failed to champion his cause. No matter how large his intellect grew or how many other intellectuals he met, Sheldon maintained that his Meemaw was the smartest, strongest and most loving person he knew.

Sheldon was aware of the absinthe in Meemaw's Special Tea, he had known for years about the alcohol in it. Yet, his trust in her remained absolute, for at no time in his life had she ever misguided him. It was this unadulterated trust that accounted for her ability to crisscross freely over and through any and all barriers that Sheldon had set up to keep the rest of the world at bay. He granted his own mother only a limited indulgence, considering that her evangelicalism was more important to her than anything including his sibling or him. Sheldon held no illusions on that score.

While time passed for everyone else, it had ceased for Sheldon. While deep in Kholinar he had sifted through the events of the past few days. His eidetic memory produced different scenes for him to dissect and analyze as was his wont when events where so far outside his experience. Some painful details were apparent; 1) Hofstadter was not the friend he thought him and had betrayed him. 2) Wolowitz had as usual followed Leonard's cue. (Not so surprising but still painful). 3) Sheldon's monopole experiments would be delayed yet another year and therefore his path to the Nobel Prize were also delayed.

Those three facts, though painful, were discernible; Leonard Hofstadter and Howard Wolowitz were both jealous of Sheldon but even more so they hated themselves. Their cruel actions that had temporarily derailed his quest for the Nobel were due to the lack of potential they felt in themselves. He spent those recent hours dissecting the various interactions he had with Leonard and Howard from day one; their betrayal now seemed inevitable. His eidetic memory replayed all the sly remarks and insults he had not wanted to pick up on at the time of each occurrence. The emotions that came with each realization are why he practiced the Vulcan art of Kholinar. As he filed away these dissected experiences, his focus increasingly shifted to thoughts of Penny. Normally after so much negative stimuli in such a limited amount of time Sheldon would have been mentally shoring up any cracks in his emotional grid. It wasn't that Sheldon had no feelings; quite the opposite, it was that his feelings ran so deep. Sheldon would normally be seeing signs of mental fatigue and in fact, cracks in his emotional shielding had been making an appearance just before the fateful Vid-link, but were now almost imperceptible. As he went over the mental defenses he employed to keep himself from going mad and disappearing into the accumulated knowledge in his cranium; he found there was hardly any shoring up to do. The thought led him to wonder why that was. Critical thinking had him arriving at the fact that he started feeling better just before he found out Penny was at the station.

It wasn't that he couldn't intellectualize how Penny got there; the mechanics were not in question. How and why had she done it? Penny had not only shown up at the Artic Station, but she had engendered the President of Cal Tech along with the full Board of Directors to rescue Sheldon's career and save the university's scholastic face in the scientific community before it could become an issue. That fact alone raised more questions for Sheldon than he had the data for. Then as if that herculean feat was not enough, she had managed to not only have herself flown to his side but also his precious Meemaw and in the unofficial company of The Royal Canadian Air Force!

These were not actions that would be associated to a waitress with big screen aspirations. He doubted that even his beloved Meemaw could have orchestrated such a rescue mission. Sheldon was under no illusions, he was well aware how stressed he was. The lex talionis she had orchestrated for Leonard and Howard was in his mind a justified animus, but this led to even more speculations. While the scientist in Sheldon pondered the many questions still unanswered; The Homo Novus male was eager to re-establish his reunion with Penny. His body was eager to rise up into consciousness and engage Penny in a most primal way. These new feelings were hardly under control and that actualization was the most alarming. Only Kholinar kept the animal mind tethered.

Even now he was swimming in her delectable scent. He felt the warmth of her as she directed his placement in the middle of a bed he'd never been in before. She even removed his shoes and tucked a light blanket in around him just the way he was accustomed too. Then to his somnolent astonishment she crawled up next to him and draped an arm lightly across his chest and whispered in his ear.

"I know you're almost awake and I'm sure you can hear me. I'm not trying to invade your space but I think I need a little nap, it's been sixty two hours since I last slept baby and I'm starting to feel a little out of it. Wake me when you're ready." Then he felt her lips lightly on his cheek before he felt her lay her head down.

Sheldon had been trying to control this emerging physical instinct for months and now Penny's light kiss damn near tore down what tenuous grip he had achieved. He had dubbed this new side of himself as his 'animal mind'; this side of him had amplified as his body had enlarged and augmented itself. The animal mind was nowhere near integrated with the rest of his persona but he had established that his sexuality and the unfamiliar urges were fixated on Penny. No other woman had called forth this response in him, not even remotely. Experiments in his twenty first year, had left him unimpressed and were abandoned as it took time he could be spending on theoretical physics.

He had always had to be in control of himself and as much of his environment as others would concede to. The more one is in control the less possibility of being caught off guard and injured (emotionally or physically). His veridical attention to details and scrupulous adherence to his routines had sufficed right up until Penny.

'At first he thought of her as distraction from his Nobel curriculum, with her constant unheralded entrances into his apartment with her banal chatter and her unwarranted touching. It took the genius several weeks to find he actually looked forward to the charged atmosphere and mini wars in which he wasn't always the victor. After the first year of her living across the hall he allowed himself to admit that he had become fond of her, discovered that she had become integral to his daily patterns. It was this last year though after exhaustive self-examination Sheldon realized that he was completely enamored of the green eyed beauty. Not that there was anything he would do about it, he was grateful for just her being his dearest friend.' Sheldon couldn't help but secretly believe what everyone else said, that he was broken; he knew that his inability to correctly interpret his or other's emotion was a deficit.He knew that his extreme reactions and his asocial behavior weren't going to attract a mate let alone someone as vibrant as Penny. 'Plus, what woman wants to keep running to her mate's rescue, from spiders in the tub to academic assassination?' So he decided not to pursue a mate, he had science and the Nobel Prize to pursue that would suffice. Then came Penny!

'Penny deserves someone who is as loving and good natured as herself. But Good Lord, I would give up the Nobel Prize to have her look at me again and call me 'baby' like she just had. When I wake her for our talk I'll have to inquire as to the change in her normal endearments.'

Sheldon took another hour to struggle with the sensation of her lips on his cheek and the change of blood flow to his animal mind. 'I will not lose my control over my body' I will not rush, I will take my time, I am in control of my body', became Sheldon's mantra. When he finally opened his eyes, he rolled over on his side and watched the sleeping beauty curled up next to him in his bed. 'Why is she in bed with me surely this place has another bedroom? She must still be worried about me' Sheldon surmised. 'And doesn't that just make me love her even more'. Sheldon felt saddened anew when he thought how he had no chance in hell with Penny. The animal mind on the other hand had also awaken and reached through Sheldon with three of his senses to partially free it. Sheldon was barely aware that he was gently brushing a lock of her hair lightly across his lips, inhaling her cherry blossom and almond shampoo, mixed with her own warm scent while he watched her sleep. For another hour his body alternated between Sheldon's intellect and bewilderment in his reaction to Penny.

When she burrowed tighter into his side Sheldon didn't fight when his arms closed around her and pulled her exhausted form onto his chest. With her situated thus, the animal mind could see that she was indeed fatigued which curbed its hunger for her. As much as he wanted to believe that she was here for more than friendship, the scientist refused to jump to conclusion even though the data was starting to add up.

"But why though?" he whispered.

"Because I love you, Moonpie" came the sleepy reply.

Sorry it took this so long to get this Chapter out. The next chapter should appease those of you waiting on Penny's confession and Sheldon's reaction will be out by this Friday. Again thank you all for your kind words and helpful points of view!

PS I still own nothing of TBBT but I do love the Characters and am just borrowing them for a little AU and a whole lot of OOC.