Satuday I didn't plan on doing anything today. Since tomorrow was my last day to actually feel alive. I knew it was early in the morning but do you think I care? Nope, and I never will. Edward. He was still the main thought in my head. When I left, I new I was going to be leaving my heart behind. I wanted him but I didn't want him to live like I do. Wake up and make everyone do things under your order. I didn't even what to live like that. Alice and Rose are going to be telling Jasper and Emmett tomorrow like I am. Emmett and Rose are doing it at the Cullen household and Jasper and Alice at Marie's. I was telling him at the park. Marie is happy were telling them but thinks it might be late for them to forgive us. I'm starting to agree with her. "He is going to be happy." "He is going to love you still." "He isn't going to be pissed." "He isn't going to hate you." Those were the lines I kept telling myself. I sat up from my bed and walked over to my closet. I reched for the box on the top shelf. I sat it down on the floor and I sat in front of it. I opened and saw the princess crown. Perfect in everyway. I felt like I shouldn't even wear it anymore. I'm not Isabella Marie Swan. I'm just Bella Swan. For now atleast. I put it on. I didn't feel like it is mine like it was before I left. Someone knocked on my door. It was Marie. "Hey, how you holding up?" She came and handed me some hot cocoa. "Fine, I guess." I lied. I took of the crown place it back in the box. "You have a visitor." In walked Jacob. "I'll leave you too alone." She left. "Jake, hey." I hugged him. "Hey, Bells." He hugged me back. "Why are you here?" I was happy but curious. "I have to tell you something." He looked serious. "What?" I wiped away the hair out of his eyes. "Are you a princess?" He blurted. I'm pretty sure I had a shocked look on my face. "Whe- are, uh, um, yeah. I am." He would've figured it out anyway. "Oh, Princess Of Jordan?" He smirked. "Why? How?" I asked. "You looked familiar. I won't tell anyone. I mean, I know Rose and Alice are also." I nodded. "Are you mad?" I asked. "No, why would I be mad? I know I sorta just met you but, I feel I've known you forever." He whispered. "Me too. You're my best friend." I leaned my forehead against his. "When are you leaving?" I licked my lips. "Monday or Tuesday." He nodded. "I'm going to miss everyone." He leaned in more and kissed my cheek. I closed my eyes. "You have no idea how much I love you, like my sister." He whispered. "You are the brother I never truly had." I smiled. He leaned away and looked at the clock. "I should get going." I kissed his cheek and watched him walk out. I looked out the window and saw his motorcycle ride away. I scratched my head confused. What the hell is going on? I walked over to the radio and turned on the radio. "Everyday I sit here waiting I'm heavily broken Almost giving up on trying I'm heavily broken Feels like I'm drowning I'm heavily broken I'm heavily broken
Everyday just seems so long
And now I've had enough of all the hating
Do we even care, it's so unfair
Any day it'll all be over
Everyday there's nothing new
And now I just try to find some hope
To try and hold onto
But it starts again
It'll never end
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move
When there's nothing left to say
What can you do
I'm heavily broken
And there's nothing I can do
Almost heading for a fall
And now my mind is screaming out
I've gotta keep on fighting
But then again
It doesn't end
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move
When there's nothing left to say
What can you do?
I'm heavily broken
And there's nothing I can do
And there's nothing I can do
I'm screaming for air
(Screaming for air)
Louder I'm crying
And you don't even care
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move
(What can I do)
When there's nothing left to say
What can you do
I'm heavily broken
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move
When there's nothing left to say
What can you do
I'm heavily broken [x3]."
Can't you see that I'm choking? I can't even move. When there's nothing left to say, what can you do? I'm heavily broken.
The lyrics that describe my heavily broken heart. I sat in bed and didn't turn the radio off.
"Walk into the room
I look and I assume
That you look like all the other guys
I look into your eyes
You got me mesmerized
You're pulling me into your dreams
Eyes are so intense
From the lost suspense as if I haven't seen your face before
Don't know why I feel you're just so so surreal
I can't get you outta my mind
Whoa whoa
I don't even know your name
Whoa whoa
But I still feel the same
How can I fall so hard for someone
Who only has a face no name
Never felt this way by anyone
I thought you guys were all the same
How can I fall so hard for someone
How was I supposed to know
Got his name I think about the wonder
Save my broken heart and soul
I've been hurt before
The future I foresaw
Thought about the way I felt again
Will it be the same?
Is it me who's changed?
No chance of compromise no
Is it hard to see
The future of you and me
Is it just a dream I'm thinking of
The future I foresaw
I've been hurt before
Then you walk into my life
Whoa whoa
I just wanna know his name
Whoa whoa
Cause I still feel the same
How can I fall so hard for someone
Who only has a face no name
Never felt this way by anyone
I thought you guys were all the same
How can I fall so hard for someone
How was I supposed to know
Got his name I think about the wonder
Save my broken heart and soul
Whoa whoa
I don't even know your name
Whoa whoa
Cause I still feel the same
How can I fall so hard for someone
Who only has a face no name
Never felt this way by anyone
I thought you guys were all the same
How can I fall so hard for someone
How was I supposed to know
Got his name I think about the wonder
Save my broken heart and soul
How can I fall so hard for someone
Who only has a face no name
Never felt this way by anyone
I thought you guys were all the same
How can I fall so hard for someone
How was I supposed to know
Got his name I think about the wonder
Save my broken heart and soul."
How can I fall for so hard for someone? Never felt this way by anyone. I thought all you guys were the same. Save my broken heart and soul.
Lyrics of my life, again.
Other songs didn't really describe how I was feeling. It about 3am when another song caught my attention.
"It's 3 AM, I start to cry, I'm alone again
I try so hard not to fall in love but here I am
And you couldn't even pretend
That you cared if this was the end
All the things you said to me won't even matter
Do what you want cause I'm not gonna save you baby
What's going on
We don't care, we don't fight
We don't even know what wrong or right
Now baby, what's going on
What's going on
There nothing else I can say, what can I do
We might have worked out someday, but it takes two
And you couldn't even pretend
That you cared if this was the end
All the things you said to me won't even matter
Do what you want cause I'm not gonna save you baby
What's going on
We don't care, we don't fight
We don't even know what wrong or right
Now baby, what's going on
What's going on
All the things you said to me won't even matter
And I couldn't even pretend
That I care if this is the end
I'm not gonna save you baby
All the things you said to me won't even matter
Do what you want cause I'm not gonna save you baby
What's going on
We don't care, we don't fight
We don't even know what wrong or right
Now baby, what's going on
What's going on
But here I am... "
We don't care, we don't fight. We don't even know what's wrong or right. All the things you said to me won't even matter. And I can't even pretend, if this was the end. But here I am.
Why did all the songs have to match my life? Stupid radio. I shut the radio off and tried getting some sleep. Seeing tomorrow, well today is the day I'm going to be telling Edward, everything.
The first song is Heavily Broken, the second is Fall So Hard, and the last one was What's Going On. Hope you like! R&R!
