Disclaimer: I don't own a DAYUM thing!
JG: Here comes Dethklok making a spectacular entrance as always.
Dethklok enters with much fire and brimstone, killing several audience members that are close to the flames.
JG: OOH! Look out for those flames, Nick!
ND: The same can't be said for those poor fans, Johnny. Good thing they signed their waivers.
JG: And here comes the Ginyu Force, acting as….flamboyant as usual.
The Ginyu Force zooms into the ring and strikes their signature ridiculous pose.
ND: I think Dethklok has their work cut out for them this time.
JG: How so, Nick?
ND: Well for one thing, if I remember right, the Ginyu Force are fast moving and have their weird anime attacks correct?
JG: You may be right Nick. Well, let's go down to the ring where our special guest referee Iruka Umino will start the match.
Captain Ginyu looked over his other four companions (Jeice, Burter, Recoome, and Guldo) and gave them orders.
Ginyu: Make sure you destroy every last bit of them.
Others: YEAH!
At the opposite end of the ring, Nathan Explosion gave his other four band mates (Skwisgaar Skwigelf, Pickles, William Murderface, and Toki Wartooth) a talking down as well.
Nathan: All right guys, we're doing this for all that is metal.
Murderface: Can I have some booze now?
Nathan: NO you piece of shit ass, dick munch.
Pickles: Heh, that he does.
Murderface: Hey shut up dickwad!
Captain Ginyu noticed they were having trouble from across the ring.
Ginyu: Easy win, boys!
Iruka Umino then called both teams to the center to start the fight.
Iruka: Alright you clowns, let's start this to see who is more "badass".
Guldo started to make faces at Dethklok while Recoome flipped them off and laughed. Instantly, Skwisgaar reached out his hand and ripped the finger right off of Recoome, causing the big guy to back away in pain and started to sob. Ginyu angrily kicked him to get up.
Iruka: Let us commence!
Ginyu: Alright team, let's decide who will take them out!
The five members instantly ducked down (except for the shortest, Guldo) and began a game of rock-paper-scissors. Nathan, Murderface, Toki, and Pickles simply stared at this in disbelief while Skwisgaar fiddled around some on his guitar (which he had carried with him all the way into the ring).
Nathan: THIS is why I hate them! They do this shit all the time!
With a yell, Nathan instantly ran towards them and hopped on Jeice's back and started to pound his head mercilessly.
Jeice: OI! Let go of me you stupid blighter!
JG: And Nathan Explosion has started off this fight, Nick.
ND: Uh oh, it looks like the rest of the Force is trying to help him out.
Indeed, Recoome and Burter came to the aid of their partner and threw Nathan off of Jeice.
Recoome: Goodbye stupid.
Burter: You've sung you're last note, Explosion!
Recoome and Burter started to charge up ki blasts when they heard some amazing guitar playing coming from Skwisgaar who was helping his teammate out. They instantly stopped charging their attacks and stared with awe at the sight.
Burter: It's amazing!
Recoome: It's like an angel! It makes me want to arm wrestle!
While they were distracted, Nathan jumped on Burter's back and started to pound him. In the background, Murderface had begun to beat on Jeice while Pickles started to beat on Captain Ginyu with his drum sticks. Toki simply stood looking at Guldo.
Toki: Ooh, you's just a littles ones aren't yous?
Guldo: Little! I'll show you!
Guldo then instantly held his breath, causing time to stop for the entire arena. He then proceeded to punch Toki several times before starting to breathe again. Toki now felt the punches and went down to the canvas.
ND: What just happened, Johnny?
JG: It's that little Guldo's special attack. By holding his breath, he can stop time dead in its tracks! It might prove very deadly here.
M. Night: WHAT A TWEEST!
ND: Who let you back up here?
Nick then pushed M. Night off again, sending him down to the concrete again.
Back in the ring, Pickles continued to pound his drumsticks against Captain Ginyu.
Pickles: I must say, man, your hollow head is much better to use then a drum.
Ginyu: Why, you!
Ginyu then grabbed Pickles and threw him into a corner turnbuckle. While this happened, Jeice now began to beat on Murderface.
Jeice: They don't call me the Red Magma for nothin', mate.
Murderface: Really, I thought they called you the Crimson Inferno.
Jeice (smiling): Depends on which dub you listen to, mate.
Murderface: Maybe they should just call you the Blood Red.
At that moment, Murderface turned around, revealing he had some bass guitar strings in his hands. He wrapped the strings around Jeice's leg and began to cut into his leg by moving back and forth extremely fast. Jeice howled at the pain and dropped to the ground. Murderface then wrapped the strings around Jeice's neck and began to do the same thing.
Murderface: Shh, it's almost over.
Jeice tried to remove the bass guitar strings from his neck to no avail. His hands dropped to his side after Murderface cut deep into his neck, causing his neck to bleed. Murderface let his dead victim go, letting him splat against the canvas, his blood still spilling out.
Murderface: Ew, I think I got some of his shitty blood on my foot!
ND: We have our first kill, Johnny!
JG: Murderface executes Jeice and quickly brings Dethklok into the lead!
Toki now beat on Guldo, kicking and punching him into the ground. Trying to get a reprieve, Guldo used his other special move and stopped Toki dead in his tracks.
Toki: What the? I can'ts moves!
Guldo: That's the idea, idiot!
Guldo then began to laugh as he charged up a ki blast. Meanwhile, Recoome was still being mystified by Skwisgaar's amazing guitar playing.
Recoome: Duh, what type of man are you?
Skwisgaar: I'ms no man, I'ms a god!
He then played an amazing riff and a fast solo, astounding Recoome even further.
Recoome: I can't take it anymore, it is too awesome!
Recoome, due to his goofy nature, could not stand Skwisgaar's guitar playing anymore. He screamed and proceeded to tear out his eyeballs with his hands. Recoome then punched his chest repeatedly to crack his armor open. Using his bare strength, he ripped open his own chest and pulled his beating heart out of his body. As his heart beat one more time, Recoome fell backwards onto the canvas.
ND: That's two down!
Ginyu, angry that two of his comrades were dead, stopped going after Pickles and zoomed over to Skwisgaar.
Ginyu: Hmph. You're no god.
Ginyu then launched a ki blast into Skwisgaar, launching straight through him zooming into the crowd. Skwisgaar simply looked down at the hole in his body.
Skwisgaar: Damns, I guess I AMS a man.
His eyes then rolled into the back of his head and he fell over, dead.
JG: Ooo, what a quick retaliation by Captain Ginyu, it is now a 4-3 match up.
Nathan, Toki, and Pickles: Skwisgaar!
Murderface: Guy whose mom I want to bang!
Over by Toki, Guldo smiled evilly as he charged his ki blast, ready to destroy the helpless Toki. He suddenly was tapped on the shoulder. Guldo let up his charging attack and turned around to see Pickles.
Pickles: Pardon me, would ya mind holdin' these?
Pickles then rammed his drumsticks into Guldo's extra two eyes, causing him to scream in pain. Pickles then proceeded to beat on Guldo even more.
Meanwhile, Nathan was still on Burter's back, head butting his back and kicking him as much as possible.
Burter: Get off me damn it!
Nathan: Not while you are still alive you fucking metal pansy!
Murderface, after picking up Skwisgaar's guitar ran over to join in on the Guldo beating. He then gave the guitar to Pickles.
Murderface: I think you might want to use this.
Pickles: Thanks man.
Pickles then slammed the guitar into Guldo's face, slicing it up even further.
Guldo: Ow.
Guldo then dropped to the ground. Pickles was confident to walk away and dropped the guitar. Murderface, however, was not so content.
Pickles: Come on, man, leave him, he's dead already.
Murderface: I'll leave him when I feel like it!
Murderface then jumped straight onto Guldo's face, crushing it into a pile of blood and brain chunks.
Murderface: Ok, NOW I feel fine. Ew, frog shit all over my shoes.
They both walked away as they left Toki still frozen (Toki not realizing he could move now).
Toki: Um, guys? Guys could yous help mes? Hello?
ND: The Ginyu Force only has two more teammates left, Johnny. Dethklok may actually win this thing.
JG: This is not turning out how we thought it would, but it's a hell of a great fight.
Captain Ginyu, noticing Guldo's demise, sighed at the ineffectiveness of his squad.
Ginyu: Burter, get ready for our secret attack!
Burter: Yes sir!
Burter then finally shoved Nathan off his back and sped away, zooming right passed Toki who had finally figured out he was unfrozen.
Toki: Wow, I feels wierds.
Toki's body then fell apart into pieces.
Nathan, Pickles, and Murderface: Toki!
JG: Oh my god! Burter was moving so fast he tore Toki to pieces as he went passed him!
ND: Maybe we can't count the Ginyu Force out of this just yet, Johnny!
Ginyu then stood in the middle of the ring with the remaining three Dethklok members surrounding him. Nathan picked up the guitar and wielded it like an axe.
Nathan: You're teammate abandoned you, Ginyu.
Murderface: Yeah, prepared to get your ass whupped!
Ginyu: He'll be back, but right now I want to have some fun with you.
JG: Ginyu looks cornered, but does he have something up his sleeve?
Ginyu (smiling): CHANGE NOW!
Using his Body Change technique, Ginyu instantly switched bodies with Murderface. Nathan and Pickles closed in on Murderface in Ginyu's body. Pickles got ready to hit him and Nathan raised the guitar when Murderface noticed what had happened.
Murderface (in Ginyu's body): Wait you guys! Don't hurt me! I'm in Ginyu's body!
Nathan and Pickles looked at each other and then simply shrugged. They then still proceeded to beat the tar out of Murderface. Nathan brought the guitar down on Murderface's neck, shattering it and killing him. They then turned on Ginyu who still smiled evilly. They charged him as Ginyu did his Body Change technique again.
Ginyu (in Murderface's body): CHANGE NOW!
Instantly he changed bodies with the only other person in the ring, Iruka Umino. Nathan and Pickles got ready to attack again, but were being pleaded by Iruka this time.
Iruka (in Murderface's body): Don't do it, I'm not Ginyu! Plus I'm one of the most popular characters in Naruto!
Nathan: We really don't give a shit.
Pickles: Yeah, we hate that show, it's fuckin' gay!
The two then proceeded to beat the screaming Iruka senseless, breaking the guitar on Murderface's former body. Nathan then stabbed the broken guitar head into Iruka's mouth, killing him as well.
JG: There goes our special guest ref.
ND: And just like that, the Ginyu Force is back in the game.
JD: I see Ginyu's attack plan now, Nick. He'll use his Body Change move to trick Dethklok into killing their own members. And now, with him in Iruka's body, who KNOWS what will happen!
Pickles and Nathan approached Ginyu again, now ready for his Body Change attack.
Ginyu (in Iruka's body): You think I will change out of THIS body? Not with all that this fool can do!
Ginyu then instantly disappeared and reappeared on the outside of the ropes. Pickles and Nathan tried to walk towards him when Ginyu held his hand out to stop them.
Ginyu (in Iruka's body): I wouldn't do that, I just used one of this guys best attacks. You'll notice that at your feet are several tags. If you even move, the tags will explode, taking you with them!
ND: It appears that Ginyu has sealed Dethklok's fate, Johnny! They would need a miracle to get out of this!
Just then, Burter came zooming out of nowhere.
Burter: You killed the Captain you bastards!
Burter then lifted Pickles and Nathan up with his hands, out of the exploding area.
Ginyu (in Iruka's body): Burter you stupid idiot! I told you that our "secret attack" consisted of me switching bodies with people and causing them to kill each other! Why did you have to ruin it!
Burter instantly dropped Pickles and Nathan safely out of the ring then landed by Ginyu.
Burter: Sorry, sir. Let's get them now!
Ginyu (in Iruka's body): Good, fly me a little closer, this body can't fly.
Burter then grabbed Ginyu and dropped him closer to where Pickles and Nathan were. Burter let Ginyu down, then came down himself.
Ginyu (in Iruka's body): Now-.
Ginyu then looked down to see that Burter had deposited them both in the exact spot where Dethklok had been only moments before, with the explosive tags at their feet. Ginyu only looked angrily at Burter.
Ginyu (in Iruka's body): Burter, you're a fucking idiot!
There then was an explosion, and bits of Ginyu and Burter rained down upon the crowd.
Nathan: Now THAT was fuckin' metal!
Pickles: You got dat right, man.
JG: Amazing! The Ginyu Force's own stupidity brought about its end! And Dethklok pulls this match out of the bag!
ND: What a great fight!
JG: You've got that right, Nick, and don't go away! After the break, we'll have our 22 team James Bond Henchmen battle royale!
CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH
