They found Carly sitting in the backseat with her arms crossed. She refused to speak to either of them and when they got back to Bushwell Plaza, she walked up the eight flights of stairs to avoid riding the elevator with them.

Freddie said good night to Spencer and headed into his apartment. He went to his room and slumped into his desk chair. The image of Sam pleading him to call off the guards flashed through his mind. He wished he could call her. He wasn't sure how much contact she would be allowed to have while in the hospital, but he was sure that even if he could call her, she wouldn't talk to him. There was so much he wanted to tell her though. He pulled out a piece of lined paper and began writing:

Sam,

Please don't rip up this letter. I know you're mad and you probably hate me for what I did. That's fine. You can be mad at me as long as you like. But please know I only did it to help you. I can't stand to see you in so much pain. It kills me to think what might have happened if we didn't come upstairs when we did. I don't know how far you would have gone. I do know that if anything had happened to you, I would never forgive myself. I realized something tonight. It hadn't occurred to me before. I love you. More than that even. I am in love with you. I know because I realized that if I could, I would give my life if it meant you never had to feel any more pain. I would take your suffering for you. I wish I could. I know you're in a lot of pain right now. And I know part of that pain was caused by me because you feel that I've betrayed you. I hope, in time, you'll come to forgive me. But more than anything, I hope you accept the help the doctors try to give you. Please let them help you. Let them help you get better so you can come back to me. I miss you already.

Love always,

Freddie

He folded it up and put it in an envelope. He decided he'd take it to the hospital tomorrow and try to convince someone to get it to her. Then he turned off his light and crawled into bed.


Please Review!