Yeah, I know... it's still a bit early XD BUT... I was bored and hey, at least by my clock it is already Sunday . XD Not that I've managed to keep the posting schedule straight lately . But I doubt there is anyone who's going to complain XD
Lovely Rebel
Rating: M
Pairing(s)/Threesome: Ed/Greed, later there will be Ed/Roy which will finally lead up to Ed/Greed/Roy. Oh, and I even managed to squeeze in past Roy/Ed XD There are also hints at past Al/Winry
Warnings: angst, sap, AT, lemons, Ed's mouth, humor, trying to sound as if I understand alchemy XD
Word Count Chapter: 2.436
Word Count FF posted to date: 43.992
Summary: Ed's brother puts him on a boarding school after having had to deal with him one time too often.
Thanks: To anime_gal22 and lectawindwalker for the amazing Beta jobs they did on this! *hugs them both*
Author's Note: Ok, just so you know, this chapter is a bit shorter than usual. But then, I didn't want to make it any longer since I think the effect comes across better like that . Also, there will be a little extra after the chapter - one of my beta's (Lecta^^) reaction to this chapter . XDDD
Lovely Rebel – Chapter 12
Two days had passed since their discussion and while the blond had told him that he wasn't going to go and meet the black-eyed man, the older of the two could see that he wanted to. He could see more than that, in fact. And as much as he didn't want to see it, it wasn't something that he could just ignore.
"You should go see him again," Greed told the blond softly as he watched Ed look at the cell phone Roy had given him for the fifth time in ten minutes. Jerking his head around, his lover looked at him with wide, unbelieving eyes. Sighing inwardly for what he was about to do, the taller teen got up and sat down beside the golden-eyed one, laying one hand on his shoulder.
"We both knew that this day may come," he continued just as gently as before. "I knew that I might lose you to your past the moment we started to get those flashes. I can see that you want to be with him, and that you're torn between your feelings, Ed."
Closing his eyes to hide the storm of emotion that was raging inside him, Edward shook his head, denying what the green-eyed youth was telling him. Unperturbed, Greed continued.
"We have been together for months now; I can see that this is hurting you. Do you really think that I want this? Ed, I love you. I told you this multiple times before, but I want you to know that it's true. I love you and if I had the choice, I would want nothing more than to keep you for myself." He had taken hold of the blond's chin, turning his face around to look at him better, seeing the tightly closed eyes that gleamed slightly at the edges, signs of too much fluid. Sign of tears.
"Open your eyes, Ed," the taller teen requested, though his voice didn't allow any discrepancy. Slowly, the lids opened again, showing the torn golden orbs behind them.
"I've known that all the time that we have been together, you have been missing something. And while I had wished for it to change with time, I now realize that I never had a chance. You are not meant to be with me, you are meant to be with him. It had been like this in the past, and the past is repeating itself. The last time you never had to make this choice, since I died before anything could start between us, but since I'm still alive this time, you'll have to make it now. I love you enough to realize that, which is why I decided to make this easy on you. You need to go be with him Edward. It's what your heart is telling you, I know it."
His own voice couldn't hide the pain he felt, but he tried as best as he could to not let it show completely, hoping against hope that his lover would be too occupied with his own dilemma to notice. He didn't want to let go of Ed. Just the thought of it tore him apart from the inside. But he could also see that if he didn't let him go, their relationship wouldn't survive. The blond's heart yearned after Roy, just like it always had. These two were meant to be together, no matter in what life they met. Standing between them would be cruel. And he didn't want the person who was the most important to him to suffer. Sooner would he want to die again than to be the reason of his lover's pain. Like this, he hoped, they might be able to save their friendship at least.
"I don't want it to be like this. I never wanted it to be like this," Edward replied at last, giving in, his voice barely more than a whisper and heavy with unshed tears. George had only seen his lover cry once – the day of the anniversary of his parents' death. Since then it hadn't happened once. He might be sometimes overrun by his emotions, but there wouldn't be any tears. That there were some shimmering in those eyes Greed loved so much now spoke volumes about how much this hurt the blond.
"I know." He told him. Pulling the shorter teen in his embrace, he buried his face in the silken hair, feeling him wrap his arms around his torso in return and holding on tightly. For a minute they just sat like this, the younger of them shaking slightly in the green-eyed teen's arms. Then, suddenly, Ed pulled back, hitting his fist against the chest before him, still not looking up, his face cast downwards.
"Why, damnit, WHY? Why does it have to be like this? I love you! Do you hear me? I love you damnit! I don't want to leave you!" he cried out, hitting him with his fist multiple times before finally breaking down into sobs. Greed didn't say anything, just pulling him back tightly against him.
"I know." He repeated, his own voice barely audible. And that was what it came down to. He knew. He knew from the start that there might be problems, even though he had hoped that whatever came their way, they would be able to work it out. But there was no solution for this mess. He knew Ed loved him – he never doubted that – but he also knew that with him, the blond would never be truly happy. There was no way he was going to refuse him the happiness he so deserved.
Realizing that his lover wouldn't calm down anytime soon, the taller teen laid them down on the bed, never loosening his embrace, holding his beloved close and letting him cry. After a long while he felt the tears and sobs slowly cease, leaving them in a nearly oppressing silence. Only their ragged breaths spoke of the emotions that were still running high.
They lay like that for a long while – Greed didn't know if it was only minutes or hours – when they both suddenly heard the cell phone ring, making them jerk up. Seeing the stubborn way Ed refused to look at it, the black-haired teen sighed. Sitting up he grabbed the phone from the blond's desk, holding it before his face.
"Go. Go meet him. I know you will feel better once you do. Maybe you'll continue to hurt for a while, but it's better than the alternative," he told him, standing up and leaving the ringing cell phone lying in front of Ed's face. The shorter youth's eyes were still filled with pain as he looked after him, still refusing to take the phone, but also not stopping his lover from getting away.
"I don't want to lose you," he whispered at last, nearly breaking Greed's heart with it. Turning around once more he kneeled down beside the bed and caressed the blond's cheek with one hand, before laying his forehead against the golden-eyed teen's.
"You won't lose me, I will always be here. I will always be there for you, always loving you," he assured him, though it sounded more like a confession. And when one got right down to it, it really was what this was, wasn't it? He would never be able to stop loving Ed, no matter what would happen.
Giving his soon to be ex-lover one last smile and a parting, chaste and loving kiss, he stood back up again, leaving the room. He needed some space right now. Not to say that he really didn't wanted to be in the room when the blond talked to him. It wasn't as if he held this against Roy – it wasn't anymore his fault than it was Edward's after all – but he couldn't help but feel resigned towards the older youth. He envied him for what he would get, the one thing that he had ever wished for himself.
The one person who could ever understand him.
The one person who ever wanted to understand him.
The one person he had ever wanted to love and spend his life with.
The one person who possessed his heart.
~*~*~H~*~*~
It was really happening. His heart was screaming at him that he wasn't saying anything, that he wasn't doing anything to prevent this from happening, but… what was he to do? Greed was right; they had known this day might come. They had never really talked about it, but deep inside of themselves, they had known. There had been too many indicators that history was repeating itself, too many signs – as much as he hated to admit it – that showed that his future was already laid out for him by destiny.
What disgusted him the most, however, wasn't even the fact that it was apparently no use to fight his fate. It was the fact that he accepted it like this. There was a part inside him that wanted to fight for his green-eyed lover, wanted to stay with him and never let go.
But there was also a part that pulled him towards Roy, which wanted to scream and dance in ecstasy over the fact that now they, finally, could be together again.
Feeling both of these parts of his heart fighting… it was trying, maddening. It was as if he couldn't settle for one, but no-matter what would happen, his heart would always cherish both.
He didn't know how to feel about that. In the past, he only had had one lover – he knew that much. Why was it like this now? Why had he fallen in love with Greed when destiny clearly wanted him to be with Roy again? Or was what his ex-lover had said really true? That he only didn't have to make this decision last time because it was his fate to kill the green-eyed teen, man then? He didn't know.
The phone was still ringing, and Ed knew that by now, Roy must be wondering what took him so long to answer the call. Some part of him still didn't want himself to answer the phone, wanted to deny his fate, wanted to be stubborn. But he knew after today that no matter what happened, you couldn't run away from what was planned out for you by whatever power ruled the universe. Be it the gate, a god, or simply the flow of time.
Sighing, the blond took the small cell phone in his hand, lifting it to his ear. Remembering his talk with the black-haired man only a bit over a week ago made him smile sadly. He had a promise to keep.
"Hey.,." he answered, knowing that his voice sounded rough from crying and bleeding emotions.
"Ed? Did something happen?" the other caught on to it instantly, becoming worried. Even though the golden-eyed teen didn't want to, he smiled slightly at that. It was always nice to know that people cared for you, but especially nice when these people were important to you.
"Something like that. You said you would call when you would know the time for a meet-up? Well, why don't we make a date out of it?" he offered, feeling a bit sick as he said it, but also knowing that he wanted this.
There was a silence for a few seconds before the older youth spoke again.
"Are you sure?" his voice was soft, and it was obvious that while this was something he wanted – Ed knew that – that he was concerned about his friend.
"Yeah. George and I broke up with each other. I promised you that I would tell you if it would happen, so… there is no reason for us not to date now," his own voice had gone slightly bitter, at the same time as he was feeling giddy. How could that be? How could he feel so controversy at the same time? It was making him sick…
"What? But I thought-" the black-haired man started, sounding alarmed, but the blond didn't let him finish. "Let's not talk about it, ok? I really don't feel like it right now. Let's just schedule our first real date," he told the taller youth, putting an emphasis in his voice that should make it clear to the other that he wasn't prepared to talk about this. There was the sound of a soft sigh, but as Roy spoke again, Ed knew he would honor his wish.
"Ok. I have to tell the headmaster in advance whenever I plan on taking you off the school-grounds, even though I'll be free to come whenever I want. I had planned on just coming over tonight, but this changes my plans. For our first date I really want to take you out. Is that ok with you? I could manage that as soon as tomorrow."
The black-haired man's voice had taken on the tone he used for business, and the shorter youth was grateful for that. It was as if Roy knew that he needed facts right now, nothing to think about.
"That's fine by me. I really don't think I would be up for it tonight, but I should be ok by tomorrow," he admitted, giving his friend at least some clue of his condition. The black-eyed man made a soothing and understanding sound.
"I certainly can understand that. I also don't think it would be right to take you out on a first date the day you two broke up. By the way you are talking, I gather you are still his friend – and that would be no way to honor a past relationship." Roy's voice had been soft and Ed couldn't help the wish to cry again. Why were they both so understanding of him? Why couldn't they just hate him, accuse him of not being able to settle for one of them? He hated himself right now, why couldn't they?
He forced a small smile onto his lips as he answered, knowing the other would hear it.
"Yeah, thanks," he paused. "Is there… anything special I should wear tomorrow?" he asked then, trying to change the topic.
They finalized their plans for the next evening, Roy's voice never changing from its guiding, soothing tone. It was as if Ed was a puppet, spun out of the finest porcelain, which needed to be protected. And while the blond would have usually protested against such treatment vehemently and with all he had… he felt grateful for it now.
Because, within him, he felt that as if his heart really was near the breaking point.
And now, as promised above, a little extra of how one of my beta's reacted as she first read this chapter XD We were chatting at the time and I didn't know she was also beta-ing on the side, so I was a bit surprised by her outburst XD (oh, and Heero is my nick-name ~.^ We use the names Heero and Duo for each other (from Gundam Wing^^))
Lecta: Oh, fuck you heero! YOU'RE BREAKING THEM UP?
Bloody: O_o
Lecta: DDDDDDDDDDDDD=
Bloody: oh, you're betaing XD
Lecta: *cries quietly in a corner*
Bloody: *laughs* sorry, I was just really 'whut O_o' XD
Bloody: *huggles you*
Bloody: it's not forever
Lecta: I know but still
Lecta: Greed is being waaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy to noble
Bloody: not necessarily
Bloody: he loves Ed
Lecta: I'd be like "ROY BITCH MUSTANG BACK THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY BOYFRIEND"
And this was at the end of it was I got it back from her XDDD:
=
WHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?
ED STOP BEING STUPID. YOU GET ROY AND GREED TOGETHER IN A ROOM RIGHT NOW AND TELL THEM FLAT OUT THAT YOU WANT TO FUCK BOTH OF THEM AND THAT "NO" IS NOT AN ACCEPTABLE ANSWER!
SWEET BABY JESUS! These boys are exhausting….
So, that was it^^ I hope this gave you all at least some amusement after this chapter^^ *hugs you all*
See you next chapter! :D
