Johanssen was very quiet when they got back to their bunk that night. She got ready for bed pensively and curled up, watching Beck as he finished up his nightly routine and then turned to face her.
"So," he said. "Martinez said you were talking about me two months out from Earth? I feel as though I've had the wrong concept of your… timeline."
"Oh?" she asked, propping her head on her hand. "And what concept was that?"
He shrugged, climbing into the bunk. "We've never talked about it."
Beth curled up on his chest, hiding her face. "I really was very much annoyed by you at first, you know," she explained. "I really was trying to be invisible and I felt as though your eyes were constantly on me. Everyone sort of left me alone, but you kept me up to date on every minor regulation until I became concerned that you had some private information about how I couldn't stay in the program. That was why I listened to you. So I just started thinking about you a lot. I think most of it had pretty much crystallized by the time I realized anything. That was on Earth Day."
He looked confused. "Which Earth Day?"
"Watney's Earth Day. Remember? His leaving Earth party?"
He nodded. "What about it?"
"You took me home. At some point that night was when I realized I was falling for you."
"That… that was a long time ago," he said, sounding pleased and unsure.
She nodded. "I know."
"That was the night that you kissed me." She couldn't see his face, since her own was lying on his chest, but she could tell from his voice that he was smiling.
"And you told me I wouldn't remember it," she said.
"I wondered if you had," he said, musingly. "Because you said the same thing today, when you left me with the bomb."
She lifted accusatory eyes. "You remembered too then!"
He nodded slowly. "Of course I remember you kissing me. I remembered it for a long time. It made me more uncomfortable than I liked. I took you home that night because there was a man closing in on you on the dance floor and it was making me miserable. He never touched you or anything, and Watney was right there, but I hated it. I asked Lewis if I could take you home and she looked at me like I was overreacting. I lay in bed that night thinking over my behavior and reaction to your kiss on the cheek. I didn't want to think too much about it, so I just buried everything and moved on."
They lay in silence for a moment as he traced lazy circles into her shoulder.
"So you've liked me since Earth," he said thoughtfully. "I'm glad to know that."
"Why?" she asked, grinning up at him again.
"Because of what you said to me earlier. About how we wouldn't be bound to each other after we get home. I wasn't sure how to take that. It sounded as though you weren't taking this seriously."
"Why, do you not want to take this seriously?" The words were teasing, but he could feel her heartbeat pick up in her chest.
He kissed her forehead softly, slowly, and then said, "You put a towel on your head, remember? One day, after we left Watney, you put a towel on your head and said it was your new hoodie. I think you were trying to cheer me up or something, but I just looked at you, and it was just so completely – so intrinsically – you. And then something in my mind went very still and seemed to be sort of looking directly at me. And it said: this is Beth Johanssen. And she is funny, and smart, kind of an anarchist, stubborn, and badass, and loving and loyal and pretty much a sex icon to seven billion people, and she has worked herself into your thoughts and your life until you can't remember anything before her, and you are in love with her. So, yes. I am just here, ready to take absolutely whatever it is you are willing to give me."
She looked up at him with a pleased scowl. "Yours was a lot sappier than mine."
"I feel suddenly as though I have a lot of wasted time to atone for," he replied, gravely.
She shrugged one shoulder casually. "Yeah. You kind of do."
0-
Thanks to Watney's return, the Hermes crew went through another honeymoon period as a group. The ship was full of laughter, inside jokes, and long stories told in the evening gatherings. Mark's color and energy revived quickly and his body was close behind.
But he was not the same. He did not speak of his difficult nights, but his first act on board ship was to try to solve the cooling problem in Martinez's bunk. His previous engineering skills met and married with his recent experience in desperate MacGyvering on Mars and he soon had the problem worked out, sending everyone back to their old bunks (except for Beck and Johanssen, an anomaly which their crewmates drew plenty of attention to). He seemed to crave the silence and the quiet as much as he occasionally yearned for noise and energy. Even once he had his own space back, he could still waken his crewmates with his cries, and once Beck went personally to awaken him after he began heavily sobbing in his sleep. Several crew members found him in odd trances, usually with one hand braced reassuringly against the skin of the Hermes, head ducked and eyes glazed.
Mark Watney was a survivor, but he had determined to be much more than that. He had decided to be fully alive. He patiently sat through therapy sessions with Beck, whose own tentative knowledge of psychology was backed up with teams of support from the best Earth could offer. He pushed himself to spent time with the crew, and to speak seriously of memories with Beck, and jokingly of the same memories with the crew and his family. Mark was fighting. And as usual, he would win.
So the months passed, and the joy of peace restored was replaced by the tedium of space travel. As bolts and seals fractured onboard the aging ship, tensions rose and fell among the crew. The team of psychologists initially called in as a task force for Mark Watney's mental state were refocused to do all they could for the decaying resilience of the crew.
So ship and crew hobbled through space, desperate for home and dry dock. As they entered their final month in space, they were given more hours to breathe and be together.
0-
One night, just a few weeks out from Earth, Watney barged into the crew lounge. All of them were gathered for a movie night, a now weekly occurrence according to the prescription by the Earth doctors.
"It's official!" He announced, dramatically pacing to the center of the room. "I am immortal!"
"You're really not," Beck responded dryly, without looking up.
"Oh, but I am!" The botanist returned. "As if my many sols on a foreign planet were not sufficient evidence, I am now going to be immortal-er!" He collapsed on the couch and draped an arm around Johanssen. "I am going to be a movie star!"
"Having a movie made about your life does not make you a movie star, it makes you a movie protagonist," Lewis remarked from across the room.
"But I'm going to have a cameo in the film!" Watney exclaimed, refusing to be dampened.
"That doesn't make you a movie star either," Johanssen grunted, struggling to remove his arm.
"Yeah, and how can you even know that yet?" Martinez asked.
Watney's face fell microscopically. "I think it's safe to assume!" he stated. "But anyway, today I found out that they are not just making a movie, but also a miniseries about me!"
Lewis looked up slowly, glancing at the nearest screen in accusation. "How come we weren't notified about this?"
"They wanted to ask me first," Mark explained, "seeing as it's my story and all."
"Well that's just great," Martinez grumbled. "That's a movie, a miniseries, and a novelization planned before we even make it home. What's going to happen when we actually get there and people realize you're really just a dorky vegetation enthusiast?"
Watney stared dreamily out a window. "I wonder who they're going to find to play me. Someone who could really capture what it means to be me. I think I'll accept applicants starting with a minimum of three Oscars under their belts, at least two of which need to be for acting."
Beck smirked at Martinez. "Well, actors are always a desperate group of people. I'm sure some poor soul might accept the role over a career in fast food commercials."
"I miss fast food," Johanssen mused, entirely missing the point of the conversation due to not caring very much.
"So can we watch the movie now?" Vogel grumbled. "That is, the actual, non-hypothetical movie right in front of us right now?"
"I will allow it," Mark stated generously. "But if anyone notices someone with my bone structure who is sufficiently famous, just let me know, will you? I'm sure the studio will be expecting my shortlist soon."
"You will literally be no part of this hypothetical movie," Lewis explained.
"Okay, that's it, I'm starting it!" Johanssen yelled before Watney could attempt to further educate his commander.
As the opening logos scrolled across the screen, Watney murmured to Johanssen, "You realize that by signing up to be an astronaut, you kind of put yourself in the public eye. You might as well enjoy it a little bit."
She rolled her eyes up to him. "I signed up to be an astronaut so I could see Mars. I have now seen it so my work here is done. If I could literally just jump in the water and swim straight to New Zealand after splashdown and avoid all this, I would."
"They would recognize you in New Zealand too, you know," Martinez whispered loudly over her shoulder. "Everybody is going to know you. We won't be able to do anything without being recognized. And all because one asshat couldn't avoid the only projectile on an entire planet."
Beth groaned while Mark grinned and they all turned to watch the screen as the opening orchestration began.
Five minutes into the movie, Martinez started up again. "How long do you think they will remember us though?" He asked, and Vogel groaned loudly.
"Hush!" The German hissed.
"But I mean really," Martinez continued, lowering his voice a fraction of a decibel. "Mark is the one who will be on all the magazines. They will forget about us as soon as the first mine collapses. We have to further our brand!"
Machine gun fire erupted onscreen, and a woman flipped over a car door, screaming.
"I don't understand why movies with gratuitous violence are supposed to help us bond as a team," Watney complained. "Like seriously, who picks these things?"
"Maybe the violence is supposed to prepare us for being around other humans again," Beck said, dismally.
"Or maybe this is their subtle way of warning us that in our absence, the Earth has been taken over by war and zombies and shit," Martinez considered, gaining back his decibel level.
"Actually, going through a violent or horrifying experience as a group can strengthen relationships and build long-term bonds, even if it's only fictional," Lewis said.
"Is that why people in horror movies always have insane amounts of sex?" Martinez asked. "Because I don't mind watching the movie together and all, but I need you all to know it's not going to go any further than that. Seriously, how dare you? I have a wife and child!"
"I'm not putting out either," Mark deadpanned. "But that's just because I don't find any of you even remotely attractive."
Beck, who had actually gotten involved in the movie for a moment, groaned. "When exactly did this become a theoretical orgy? This isn't even a horror movie!"
"Wait, it isn't?" Martinez asked. "I thought it was."
"How would you know?" Vogel shouted. "I'm the only one who's been watching!"
Martinez, Watney, and Johanssen all glanced at each other and smirked, their plan established. Five more minutes into the movie and Beth sighed dramatically. "Do you ever miss popcorn?" She asked.
Vogel made a small strangled noise.
"Mmm, movie theater popcorn, yes." Mark sighed. "With all that neon chemical butter sprayed over it. Hot and salty."
"If they really cared about our mental health, I think they would have sent up a lot more junk food," Martinez mused.
"How?" Vogel demanded of no one in particular. "How is this a bonding experience? How?"
Beth giggled and everyone fell silent again for several minutes.
"You know," Mark said contemplatively. "No one really knows how I spent a lot of my time on Mars. You think if I told everyone I transformed myself into a badass ninja guy like that who can kill four people with a magazine, they would believe me? I mean, they can't prove I didn't!"
"Yes they can," Beck replied. "If they tried to fight you they'd find out real quick."
"I would just tell them that I couldn't fight someone without a truly noble cause," Watney explained. "Like this guy's need to… like… avenge someone or something."
"It's actually not very clear," Johanssen agreed, cocking her head at the screen.
"I mean, it's obvious the guy's angry, but I don't feel like we know his real motivation," Martinez agreed.
Johanssen winced as another fireball went up onscreen. "Well, we know he hates cars. That's the third one he's blown up in twenty minutes of screen time."
"Maybe he just likes explosions," Watney commented. "Let's see if he blows anything else up." Two minutes later, he said, "Yep. See there? He hates helicopters too. I feel like I'm really getting in this guy's head now."
0-
Beck's report that evening to the psych team on Earth resulted in a unanimous decision to keep movies as an individual pursuit.
