I can barely see as I step back into the lift, and press the button for our floor; I try to blink back my tears, knowing in my heart that this isn't the worst- it's not even close. I know today is going to be a personal horror of my own; it's not just having to watch my tributes- it's the fact its only making my games all the more terrifyingly clear in my head.

The pound of the gong when the games opened; the screams, the cries, the killing. I had in that moment found a part of me without my moral code and I too found myself able to run, to grab, to survive. The terror clock beating inside, running faster than I ever believed I could possibly move- the fear building up inside ready and waiting to explode. I ran, and ran till I could barely breathe and my heart was drumming in my chest at almost the speed of light, I was parched my mouth dry as bone; it took me what felt like a lifetime to find water and to replenish that in which I had ran dry but all that was nothing in comparison.

The lift stops at my floor, I walk out into the empty apartment and it feels hollow; like someone has taken away everything of meaning and just left behind a shell. I take a seat in one of the chairs and place my elbows to my knees before resting my face in my hands- breathing slowly in through my nose and out from my mouth, I find some form of normality but my heart is like a drum in my chest and my head is not dissimilar to a stopwatch ticking down the time until it all begins, when the gong will sound again. I feel someone near me, I raise my head slightly and notice a young looking Avox holding a teacup and a saucer in her hand; I accept them graciously, and smile weakly at her taking a sip with a sigh of relief.

'You done too?' The voice comes from behind me and is one I know only too well.

'Yeah done…' I sigh as Johanna comes around and sits herself on the couch.

'It's a bitch, isn't it?'

'How do you do it?'

'You want my top tips?' She says her voice somewhat husky with sarcasm.

'I'll take anything.' I laugh sadly.

'You just do, when you won this you did things you never thought you could and now you have to do exactly the same.' Her voice is so very different, its soft and somewhat gentle; it's the same Johanna who I spoke to when it all got too much, it's the Johanna who is my friend.

'It's not what you expect, is it?' I say, taking a sip of my tea; watching as she pulls at the waistband of her pants and pulls on her shirt.

'Your boy has a good eye.' She sighs. 'No, it's nothing like you expect, it hurts but at a point you forget what it's like to care.'

'But you still try?'

'Of course, I do, this is only my third year I still have hope.'

'How do you cope when they…' The words hang heavy in the air around us.

'You just do, you move forward…somehow.'

'It's sick.' I breathe.

'Yeah but what the fuck can we do?'

We sit in silence each in our own thoughts, as Johanna is passed a tall cup of coffee and the automatic Capital channel flashes each tributes photo and odds on a constant slideshow. It isn't until Finnick shows up not twenty minutes later we look away from the screen.

'Morning.' He says softly, walking over and sitting beside Johanna.

'Morning.' We both say back.

I turn to the clock and notice it reads twenty past nine.

'Where do we need to be, when all this starts?' I ask.

'Down stairs, I think we better go soon as the cameras will be waiting; as well as our adoring fans!' Johanna spits.

'Lovely.'

I take a final sip of my now cold tea and place it on the coffee table, and stand straightening my skirt and taking a calming breath.

'I best go and get Blight…'

'One step ahead.' A voice says from beside the lift.

'Aren't you always!' She smirks, as we wander in the direction of the lift and step inside. My heart is pounding in my chest, and I can't help wring my hands, until Johanna loops one of my arms through hers and pulls me close to her side.

'Relax.' She breathes softly in my ear.

Blight and Finnick share a look, with Finnick giving a tiny nod of his head.

'What?' I say a little sharply.

'Nothing.' Finnick says quickly.

'Tell me now!'

'What is it?' Johanna hisses.

'Rumour is this year's bloodbath is going to be one of the worst yet, and I'm slightly unsure as to whether she is going to cope.'

Blight's words hit me hard but Johanna just unlinks her arm with mine and instead throws her arm over my shoulder.

'She'll be fine, gave her a break it's her first year…'

The lift doors open and I gasp at the difference, the opening floor is filled with people. Hundreds of people all roped off into pens with only a narrow pathway for us to walk through. The screams of our names start softly as we step out, but before I have even got my bearings they are a tidal wave of noise that is too the point of deafening. The flashes of camera light are like fireworks that come from every angle and catch us off guard, it's all I can do to place one foot in front of the other and smile, hoping my smile isn't nearly as manic as I feel. I follow Johanna, smiling in the general direction of the screams of my name that are clear enough to understand- I'm blinded by the flashing of the cameras and the fact the people just seem to be never ending as we weave our way out of the main atrium of the training centre and pass through the doors of what looks like a betting office. Its only as we pass through two final doors that the crowds cease to exist and the only shouts come from overhead- I look up and notice the ceiling to be made purely of glass and that a throng of people are watching us from above.

'Now that's just creepy.' I comment.

'Too true sister.' Johanna agrees, brushing some invisible lint from her shirt front.

'So, what is this place?'

'Basically, it's a private place we watch the games, and out there is where we go to find our sponsors.' Blight says pointing back through the doors.

'What I have to go back out there?' I ask incredulously, my mind replaying the maddened crowd.

'Yep, fun being attractive and popular, isn't it?' Finnick quips.

We wander further into the room, on a main wall is huge television screen that has a countdown to the games- it covers an entire wall and is bigger in width than some people's houses. We turn a corner and I see lots of individual booths, twelve to be exact- each with a door.

'Those are where we watch our tributes.' Blight says from behind me. 'The main screen is where you go if you want an overall view of the games or if both your tributes die but the booths are where we can purely watch our tributes.'

'Well that's considerate of them…' I hiss softly.

'Yep, they are lovely like that.'

Finnick stops in front of the door which has an emblazed four on the door, and it opens at his touch. The room is much bigger than I imagined, and is complete with a couch, two large TVs (both currently playing the same countdown as the one in the main room) and even has an array of other items to make the place comfortable. The floor is a soft carpet that looks to be fur; and the walls are hung with an expensive paper which looks of intricately drawn flowers on black each outlined in gold, there even hangs a huge gold mirror on the far wall.

'Wow…' I breathe.

'Yeah I know.' Johanna says, squeezing my arm. 'Right so we're down there okay?' She pulls me in for a hug, and I hug her back tightly- reminding myself that Johanna isn't that much older than myself.

I follow Finnick into the room after Blight squeezes my shoulder.

'You ready?' He says as he settles into the leather reclining seat in front of the screens, I take the seat next to him.

'If I can be…' I sigh.

'We've just got to do all we can.' He murmurs.

The ten-minute warning beeps out of the screen.

'Let's go and get some tea.' He suggests and we both wander out of the room, and down a short corridor and pick up the already made tea and coffee. I sit back in the chair and take an absent-minded sip of my tea, and rest my head against the head-rest.

The five-minute warning sounds.

'Finnick…'

'Yeah?'

'Thank you.'

'What for?'

'For helping me.'

'Nothing wrong with getting a little help Ay.'

The screen begins to lighten, and Claudius Templesmith voice echoes around the room- welcoming the viewers to what he predicts will be a very exciting and thrilling year. In a second the screen changes and I get my first look at what terrain the tributes face this year- it is what looks like a forest on one side with a wheat field on the other and huge lake in the middle near the cornucopia. I sigh knowing my tributes have no real knowledge of this type of terrain and if there is any threat among the food sources unless they have learnt it in training which I very much doubt.

It's as my inner monologue ticks on in my head, I see the tributes rising onto their podiums and a part of me smiles knowing that both Marina and Hugo have been in the company of Axel and Misty. I spot Hugo straight off his thick mane of curls drawing my attention, I spy Marina within a second more- her face is set like when she came onto the train, and I know in some part of her she is preparing herself for the inevitable kills.

'Ladies and Gentleman, let the seventy-fourth Hunger Games begin!' Claudius' voice echoes; and the countdown begins- those sixty seconds where I know each tribute is taking in the other; it is as the countdown clock reaches 30 that our screens zoom in one on Marina and one on Hugo- it all makes it a little too real.

The time ticks.

Ten.

Nine.

Eight.

Seven.

I can barely breathe.

Six.

Five.

Four.

Three.

Two.

One.

The gong rings out.