Sorry for the extreme long delay. Next and last chapter will probably be up next week...depends on how fast the beta'ing goes.
Thank you Sarai for betaing!
Chapter 11
"Ok you tell her yourself." Daniel said, the camera pointing at Airman Wells.
"I'm so sorry about this. Love you so much" Airman Wells said as he screamed from the pain. "God I just, I just wanted…" his voice broke off with a strangled sob.
"God god shut it off. Shut it off, I don't want her to see me die. Please, god."
" Simon, Simon! Look at me you are not going to die ok? I did not come all the way out here for nothing. Now we've stemmed the bleeding. We're gonna get you to a stretcher. We're going to get you home with your family in no time ok? Now you hang in there airman." Janet said while trying to stabilize the gaping wound.
"Yes Ma'am."
"We need to move now. Our position has been compromised. Colonel O'Neill has been hit." The camera jolted as they heard Sam's voice over the radio. Bright light flashed as the camera fell to the ground and the unmistakable sound of a Jaffa staff blast was heard. A moment of eerie silence followed and then a panicked cry.
"Daniel!"Janet was shouting. "We need a medic...w-...we need another medic!"
"What happened?" Wells cried out.
"He saved me."
Sam stopped the video with fingers that shook. She wasn't sure how she felt. Her best friend had given his life to save Janet. He'd been distracted for a second by Wells' message and seen the Jaffa aiming for their friend. He'd sacrificed himself for her. If Janet had been hit she could have been, probably would have been, dead now.
She got up slowly, thinking only of seeing him. Thanking him. Reaching the infirmary she saw that Janet was standing over him, making sure that if something happened she was there.
Sam and Janet stood there quiet for some minutes, looking at their mutual friend.
"He saved you." Sam said softly.
"He did," Janet stopped for a moment and then continued; "I can't let him die Sam. I just can't. I would have been dead if he hadn't saved me."
"You don't know. Don't feel guilty. Daniel saved you because it's in his nature to protect others. He did an incredible thing. He'll be all right." She tried to comfort Janet. She shouldn't be feeling guilty, not like Sam who deserved it.
"I know, but I just need to be here. To save him….how's the Colonel doing?"
"He's doing better. I think he can leave pretty soon. The blast didn't hit any vital organs, he should be up and about in no time."
"Good to hear."
They settled into silence, Sam staying until Teal'c arrived and she decided it was time to visit Jack again. Now he was awake and needed to stay in bed he would probably be the patient from hell.
When she arrived at his room she saw he was bored; he was idly flicking balled up bits of paper into a plastic cup. When he saw Sam he looked up for a second but continued his pointless game.
"Hey Carter, come on in."
"Sir." She sat down next to him.
"How are you holding up?" He flicked at the smallest ball, landing it neatly in the cup. Smiling he turned his full attention on her. She swallowed a little, uncomfortably and guiltily thinking just how good he looked.
His smiled faded as he asked, "How's Daniel?"
"Janet is watching him, but she's...not sure." Jack nodded and looked. Sam knew he expected an explanation of how it happened. Teal'c probably wouldn't have told him.
"Daniel got hit by a series of staff weapon blasts while trying to save Janet and Wells."
Jack raised his eyes to the ceiling. "That's Daniel. Always the hero."
"Yeah." Sam nodded with a weak smile.
"When do you go home?"
"Tomorrow," he said, but it was followed by a mutter; "if I behave." Sam grinned. His eyes brightened for a second and she relaxed, revelling in the first real smile she had had for days.
The interrogation was an irritation she could definitely have done without. This Woolsey character was a snivelling little wretch who had no idea how to run a successful military program let alone an intergalactic exploratory operation. He questioned her about the reason for the mission and its failure.
Luckily for him he didn't even broach the subject of Jack and Daniel, sticking with the niggling line "there were serious casualties on this mission, maybe even turning into fatalities". They had been lucky, she knew it and he knew it but he didn't dare say it.
Woolsey didn't find anything negative to report about Sam, much to his apparent disappointment, and consequently let her go. In the corridor after the interrogation, Sam bumped into Emmet Bregman again. He knew about the tape and wanted to know who had been injured. It was painful, but after a direct request from General Hammond she handed it over.
Jack was released the next day, with strict orders from Janet to take it easy.
Defying orders from the good doctor, Jack accompanied by Sam made a beeline for Daniel's room. Janet was hunched over him, checking his vitals, when his eyes started to flutter. Daniel was waking up.
"Daniel?" Janet asked. "Daniel can you hear me?" His eyes were sluggish but he looked up at her and nodded slowly. Everyone smiled. Janet along with two nurses bustled around the bed, checking him over. Daniel fell back to sleep a few times, not able to stay awake longer than a few minutes.
"Janet," Daniel was awake again.
"Yes?"
"I can't feel my legs. What happened?" Janet's team paused, eyeing each other anxiously. The doctor pressed firmly on his left leg.
"Daniel do you feel that?" He winced.
"No."
"Can you wiggle your toes?" Janet looked at his toes but nothing happened. Nobody said anything, but the air was thick with the awful truth; he was paralyzed from the waist down. Sam gasped, all her feelings of guilt returning in one crushing blow. She staggered from the room, Jack following swiftly. He pulled her to one side.
"Carter?" Jack asked. Sam just looked at him, tears in her eyes and shook her head.
"He…" Sam stopped, looking for the right words to say, "He is that way because of me." Jack held her gaze.
"No. He is that way because a Jaffa shot him."
"But…"
"Sam!" But she couldn't help it; the guilt was still there, gnawing at her insides. The pair locked eyes again for a second, neither knowing what to say. In the end it was Jack who softened and spoke up; "C'mere." She melted into his hug clinging unashamedly to him like her life depended on it. After what felt like an eternity Jack let go.
"Do you want to go back?" Jack asked. Sam shook her head; she owed it to her friend, and yet wasn't ready to face him. Not yet. In the end the pair silently decided to go to their respective homes. Since Jack wasn't allowed to drive just yet Sam drove him home.
Sam made sure he got safely in his home and was at the front door when Jack broke the heavy silence.
"You want a beer before you leave?" Sam wanted to say no, but Jack continued; "As a thank you for saving me." Sam doubted it for a second but it would be churlish to refuse. Nerves for the situation at hand made a dent in her guilt but despite everything that had happened, or even because of it, she understood that now was the time.
"Sir…" Sam started; she needed to have this talk. She needed to know if it was possible. "I've been thinking."
"Really?"
"Sir, please." Jack nodded and stayed silent.
"After…" She coughed.
"After you had been hit, I didn't know what to do. I needed to save you. I...I thought I had lost you. And I knew exactly what I wanted. I mean, I knew it after Prometheus but I didn't know I knew it..." Sam sighed, she was struggling with what to say.
Jack frowned. "What do you mean?"
"Jack," She waited a second and then added; "I want to go fishing with you." It was the only thing she could think of that would completely explain what she meant to say.
Jack looked completely pole-axed for a moment. Sam was worried she shouldn't have done this. She put her beer down.
"I'm sorry, I should go. I shouldn't have done this." Sam stood up, turning to leave when she felt a hand grasp her arm. She turned to face him, almost losing herself in his eyes, which for the first time in years looked truly open with no barriers or defences.
"Fishing eh?" He was grinning. Sam nodded and Jack hugged her tightly.
Sometime later Jack spoke up again; "I'll retire." Sam raised her head from his shoulder.
"No you won't."
"They can lose me, they need you."
"No, I need to do this. I have to try. Everyone else got it, my dad, mom, General Hammond and even Daniel and Teal'c had it for a while, why can't I have it too?"
"You can, but Carter, the program needs you. You are one of earth's national resources. If not national treasures. I need to retire. Again." He said with a wry grin.
"You can't. I already talked with Hammond."
Jack frowned, "Carter?"
"I requested a transfer to the labs. I can't be on SG1 anymore." She stopped for a second and looked him straight into the eyes; "I care too much about you, even if we…" She stopped again and inhaled; "Even if we weren't doing this," She gestured in between them, "I care too much."
"You sure?" Jack didn't sound convinced, but Sam sighed happily and flashed him her trademark megawatt Carter smile.
"Yes, I'm sure."
"You can go to another SG team, I can ask Hammond. You could probably even lead it."
"No, I don't want that. I can't go to other planets while leaving my family behind. Every time we go through the gate we risk not coming back, I don't want to put my family through that." Jack nodded, he understood that Sam wanted this, that she found her grace in doing this, she needed to put herself, Samantha, first not Sam or the 'Major'.
It was way too early to talk about kids and yet from their conversations off-world, Sam knew that Jack would love to have kids again.
"If I ever had kids, what would I do if I'm still on a SG team? Get maternity leave, come back, and drop the baby off at day-care while I'm going to some unexplored planet on the edge of crab nebula?!" Jack sighed.
"You know there are people on the base who have kids. You can do both."
"But I don't want to." Sam said sincerely to Jack. "I don't want to leave my kids without a mother." He nodded, understanding, and put his arm around her.
"Okay." They were quiet for a while until Jack sighed and looked her in the eyes. Suddenly he was kissing her. It was soft and sweet, like no other kiss she had ever experienced. She couldn't explain it if she tried, the man knew exactly what she wanted. Jack pulled her tighter and Sam settled into his embrace, allowing herself to feel truly happy for the first time in years.
TBC
