Oh my gosh this story is actaully being updated.


Kiba feverely scurried to the training grounds. What he had just witnessed was something most boys would have a nervous break down from. No growing boy should have to witness his mother in such a... REPLUSIVE position. If he could scrub his brain with soap right now he WOULD! When he finally returned back to reality, he noticed that he was: (a) the first person to arrive, or (b) he was in the wrong area of the training ground. Since he knew Shino was never one to be late so he was going to have to go with option (b)

For once in his miserably life Kiba wished he was first to show up. Shino would shit bricks. Not that his face didn't already look like he does- 'Stop it!' Kiba yelled at himself. There was no need for him to get angry with his best friend. "I bet you he doesn't even know yet. Betcha he thinks his old man is out on a mission, betcha he thinks his old man is innocent!" He laughed down to Akamaru. Of course Kiba hadn't noticed his puppy had wandered off to once again. "Where does he keep going? He makes me sound like an idiot for talkin' to myself." He stopped walking. He was glad no one was around to hear that last comment. He didn't need another person poking jokes at his daily stupidity.

"You must be a pretty big moron if you're from a clan that has heighten senses and you can't even figure out where your own dog ran off to." chided a voice from behind him.

When he turned to face him he knew the chump all to well. It was one of those Sand siblings. Kankero? Kunkuro? Kankuro? That was it! Kankuro, the guy that had a serve case of puppetphilia. What the hell was he doing here? "Shut the hell up jerk off! Shouldn't you be back in Suna kissing your homicidal brother's ass? Or getting freaky with one of those puppets you're so found of."

"Well gee, someone's a little touchy today. Alls I was saying' was that you need to pay attention s'more. Cheese and rice, don't' get angry." Kankuro walked over and smacked Kiba on the back. "Lighten up a little you're like acting like some fool."

Yeah. Easy for him to say. His mom wasn't getting' done by his best buds dad, and no body was stalking him calling him retarded.

"I got a lot of stuff going on. I got to go to practice before I'm late." Kiba wiggled out of Kankuros death grip.

"Yeah, no, right. Me too. Well, kind of. Gaara wants to meet up at Ichiraku's but hell if I know where that is!" Kiba sighed. Goddamn tourist. If they don't know where they're going then they should just stay home! Like Shibi... he should've stayed home... Kiba glared at the ground, shaking a fist at it. Kankuro could safely say it was an awkward moment.

"So... Your place or mine?" He asked awkwardly as sort of a way to ease the tension.

Kiba scrunched his nose in confusion "What the hell are you talking about?"

Kankuro shrugged. "To be perfectly honest I have no idea, a few of the guys back in Suna say it when they try to break the Ice." he replied earnestly

"I think you're using it the wrong way." Kiba replied as he laughed slightly at Kankuro's expense

"That wouldn't be the first time." He replied laughing at his own naivety. 'At least it's not awkward any more. I'd rather have a my ego bruised then be in a tense situation.'

"C'mon I'll show you where you got to go. I late everyday anyways." Kiba smiled.

"Sweet deal!" They headed off in the reverse direction, and walked in silence. After a few yards Kiba sighed loudly, unknown to him it was out loud. Kankuro looked over, but didn't question. But after a couple more yards he noticed that Kiba looked like he was fighting with himself. "Yo, what's your damage?"

"You really want to know?" Kiba asked. 'Wait, if I tell him, he'll ask more questions, and more questions mean more remember the Shibi, and more Shibi means more mental images of the nasty, and that means more creepy mental images of naked mom!' he panicked. "AND I DON'T WANT TO PICTURE HER NAKED!" He cried out.

"What the fuck, buddy!?" Kankuro doubled over laughing. Kiba turned red.

"Who's naked, and why do they repulse you??" Kankuro said finally recovering.

"Um...Jennifer..." Kiba lied, nonchalantly looked around him.

"Who's jenny?" Kankuro teased him.

A sign to the left of Kankuro way off in the distance caught his eye, and he said the first thing he saw on it. "Oh... you know... Tom called Lava life Monday... and met Jennifer... Thursday... eh... he sent me the dirty pics she sent him... nasty, nasty girl..." he coughed awkwardly.

Kankuro pondered on this for a moment. "When you say nasty do you mean nasty looking or you just NASTY?"

"... Both?" he responded awkwardly

Luckily for him Kankuro didn't seem to notice anything weird about his replied. "Aw dude, that's just down right gross! Tell Tom to stay away from Lava life like the plague."

Kiba laughed uneasily. "Yeah... Will do!"

"So..." Kankuro began as he crossed his arms across his chest. "We gonna get to this joint sometime today or what?"

"Oh, yeah, that! We'll be there in no time." and with that he sauntered his way to the Noodle stand, checking every so often to see if his companion was still behind him.

"So here we are!" Kiba said doing the jazz hands thing, as if Ichirakus was a new thing.

"Ohhh, I was here like 2 days ago! My hotel is like, right up the street, right there!" Kankuro sighed in amazement, and pointed to a building down the road.

"You couldn't remember that!? Its Like 5 minutes away! Dude, you call ME the dumb one??" Kiba yelled.

"Well... I... I saw you and wanted to talk... but you kept running of and before I knew it I was lost! I, I didn't mean to! And I wasn't lying. I really didn't know how to get to Ichirakus from where we met up." Kankuro mumbled nervously, and cringed like a puppy getting scolded for peeing on the carpet.

Kiba's eyebrows rose high up on his forehead. "What do you mean you wanted to talk to me?"

Out of absolutely NO WHERE, Kankuro grabbed Kiba forcefully kissed him.

Kiba was absolutely flabbergasted. He pushed the boy off and screeched "Okay that's it! STOP THE STORY RIGHT HERE!"

Kankuro eyebrows furrowed. "Dude, that's not in the Script." he said as he jabbed the very neatly collated spiral bond script.

"I really don't give a flying fudge if it's not!" Kiba shrieked as he threw his script on the ground getting it very mucking to the authors' distaste. "What the hell is going on with this story? It's a KibaHina not a KibaKanky! Besides didn't you randomly hook up with Tenten a few chapters back? And now all of the sudden you're gay. I'm really against using msn speak in real life but seriously WTF?!"

"Didn't you get the memo?" Kankuro asked as he whipped out his cell phone and scrolled to a text that all the characters had received earlier that day. The authors decided to randomly continue this, but since they felt that this story had more plot holes then a Maple-Leafs jersey in a moth infested closet they decided to fan fiction as outrageous as possible for their own amusement."

"Why didn't get a message!?" Kiba cried, fumbling around in his pockets for his phone. When suddenly it hit him- His phone was in his other coat! ...And Hinata still had it! "CURSES!!" He shrieked to the sky.

"Buddy, buddy, buddy, chill... The two nut jobs that are writing this said its only temporary" Kankuro patted his back reassuringly.

"Only temporary? ONLY TEMPERARY? WHY DO YOU TRUST THEM? THEY MADE YOU GAY! HOW DO YOU KNOW TEMPORARY ISNT A LIE?" Kiba screamed.

"Well, I'm pretty indifferent. So I'm good either way." Kankuro sighed.

"Would you listen to yourself? The Kanky I know wouldn't take this so lightly!"

"Dude. Kada wrote it in for me to say that, not like I really mean any of it." Kankuro rolled his eyes.

"Oh. Yes. Well I suppose that's true." Kiba looked at the ground again.

"H-Hey, is it my cah-cue yet?" stammered Hinata who has been waiting for her cue patiently for quite sometime.

"Hinata! Have you heard about this?" Kiba demanded fervently.

Hinata looked slightly puzzled. "Yeah, the auh-authors Kada and Kay sent us all a text tah-today. Didn't you... Oh that's right, I still hah-had your coat which your phone was i-in. Kah-kind of ironic nah-no?"

Apparently Kiba wasn't seeing the humor in that statement being the big baby he - "HEY! I CAN HEAR THAT!"

The narrator completely ignores this and decides to move along with the interruption.

"Kiba, yah-your better off ig-ignoring that stuff." Hinata whispered quietly.

Kiba's face turned red. "You wouldn't be so calm if YOU got turned gay."

Hinata looked pissed. "You think YOU'VE got it bad?! You've OBVIOUSLY haven't read much of the script for the rest of this chapter then."

"It's true!" Kada giggled to herself. Everyone except Kay ignored her. Kay giggled along although she would like to remind Kada that this isn't a self-insertion and to get the hell off the set!

Kankuro nodded. "Yeah man, she's a bit worse off then us. Here look." he said as he flipped to the part in script Hinata was referring to.

Kiba's jaw almost touched the ground. "But that is so OOC!? Why the hell would they even write that? Besides its scientifically IMPOSSIBLE!"

Hinata groaned. "If that's not bad enough, they're playing around with the idea that I end up a drugged up hooker in Brazil."

"Hey guys can we get back to the script here? I don't want to wait for my part and be in this chapter any longer then I have to." Sasuke shouted from off screen.

"You shut the hell up, and we need to talk after this, mister!" Kiba yelled.

Kankuro cleared his throat, and went back to kissing Kiba. Kiba forced himself to comply and just take it.

Flowers randomly appeared and Kankuro's eyes glazed with tears of happiness. "Kiba... After seeing you today in you grotesque jacket you had to have picked up from a good will, I realized that I was utterly in love with you."

"Stupid PMSy authors." Kiba muttered under his breath and shall be reminded that we can make the script a lot worse for him. Kiba made a slight screeching sound. "I mean... Zoh my gawd! I have just realized that it has been you I have longed to be with all this time and not Hinata."

"So... your place... or mine" Kankuro asked as he suggestively wriggled his eyebrows.

"Why bother with a place when... we... can..." Kiba inhaled deeply as he continued with what better be a lot more passion. "Get it on right here." he finished as he pounced onto Kankuro.

Hinata as innocent as people view her, was hiding inside of Ichirakus and had witnessed the whole, hot, steamy make out session. She stared wide eyed, and flushed at the scene. God how she secretly loved the sight before her.

After doing things that will not be revealed in the T rated story, Hinata marched down to the Uchiha compound in search of the sole survivor... well technically no, but you get the point! She kicked down the door to reveal on Uchiha Sasuke shaving his... legs?

The authors would like to point out that fact that THAT part was not in the script what so ever, and would appreciate it if you wiped it from your memories.

"Wow, this is awkward" Sasuke tried to discreetly hid the razor.

"Oh what the hell as long as your shaving and not being emo!" She ran over and jumped him. Taken by surprise Sasuke fell awkwardly onto the toilet, and got his ass soaked.

"Hinata?!" squealed the Uchiha as he tried to pry the girl off of him. "It's been extremely obvious I'm into you, but I was hoping we could. Well, take it slow."

Hinata was unfazed by his pleas and simply replied. "That's teh-to slow!" She began to unbuckle his pants.

Sasuke began to panic. "NO HINATA! NOT LIKE THIS!" he screamed.

Hinata smirked. "No one can hear you, so scream all you want!"

45 minutes later

Sasuke covered himself with sheets. He had never felt so dirty in his life.

Hinata rolled out of the bed and began to put on all of her lost clothes. She looked at Sasuke in disgust. "Cah-clean yourself up you feh-filthy whore!"

The minute Hinata had left, Sasuke bawled himself to sleep. When he woke up the memories flooded back. He dragged himself to the bathroom to finish shaving his legs, but he couldn't concentrate and went emo instead.

Meanwhile, Hinata headed back to Kiba. She needed to talk to him quickly.

She needed to say goodbye, and thanks. She'd be back in no time, and things would be like they always were. But fro now, Hinata felt that she was more needed in Brazil, for some unknown reason. Kiba would be the first person she talks to when she got back though. That was a promise.

She found Kiba still making out with Kankuro in the same place she had left them. She decided she's wait it out. They couldn't be that much long. After five minutes of waiting she was proved otherwise. She tapped Kiba on the shoulder... and got NOTHING. She then ripped the two apart out of frustration.

Kiba flushed slightly as he said. "Um Hinata... It wasn't what you-"

"No worries Kiba." she said with a smile. "I just wanted to say, I'm outtie. PEACE BITCH!" And with that she teleported.

--

Two months later Hinata still had not returned. No one had heard a single word from her, which worried them all. But there stood one more worried about himself, over her. Bet you can guess whom? That's right, Sasuke! He'd been staring at himself in the mirror for most of the day. He'd been staring in the mirror a lot in the past couple weeks. He glared at the carrots in his reflected hands. He really needed to stop eating them... he'd gotten really sick out of no where, and his stomach had bloated up a little bit. He frowned.

"I better not be getting fat." He grumbled, walking away to grab himself more carrots.


Yeah this was gonna go the fluffy route, but then we, me and shriveled thought it'd be more lulzy to go the satire route! Just because we needed to update, and we're sick in the head... but you love us anyways right? But yeah. This chapter is a complete joke. Well, in the sense of its horribly done, and make no sense. But it's seriously the chapter for this story. Next chapter will more then likely be just as crazy.

Sorry if you didn't like it, ahha. Just let me know with a review, cool? PEACE!