Eleven: Empress of Evil, Queen of Swords

Kira's eyes had spied something curious in the fridge this morning. Something she hoped would remove her nagging hatred for the events of the other day. Having emasculated Aizen and lost the one chance of actually kissing Ukitake she might ever have, Kira was hoping to find some comfort food. Ulquirra had been cooking something that smelt greasy and sugary earlier in the day… DOUGHNUTS! Kira had found them, but something about the way they looked worried her. She knew very well that the Arrancar, Espada especially, were unfortunate cannibals to other hollows and that these particular doughnuts were grey and silver where they were made with souls of humans and hollows, and then filled with jam or had icing on top. One with sprinkles really attracted Kira's attention, but this was dangerous. She was starving for them, but to eat them could be certain death or Hollow-fication…

"Mmmm… Sacrilicious Doughnuts!"

"BLEUARGH! I feel horrible! I'm going to cut your PENIS OFF! ARGH! I HATE YOU ALL!" Kara raised her head enough from the toilet to scream at them all, and they were slightly unnerved. Eleventh squad had been awoken by the sudden cry of panic from their own captain in order for them to fetch Lady Unohana, it had been desperate sounding and Retsu had rushed to the scene straight in her underwear. But when she had arrived, Unohana had looked unhappy to see that Kara was being quite violently sick and that Kenpachi was fully clothed, despite it being midnight. Kara was throwing up quite heavily, and as her period was late, she was worried she might be pregnant. If she was pregnant the world would end. To her surprise, even Byakuya had appeared if only to complain at the noise and now he was even more worried about what was going on.

"If she is indeed pregnant…. Then this is a very sad day for soul-society and I fear for us all… How will we be sure, Lady Unohana?" Byakuya questioned in his Seaweed Ambassador pyjamas as Yachiru tried to steal the hair-noodles from him. Unohana was just staring happily at a vial of yellow liquid she had wrestled to get from Kara. As for Kenpachi, the prospect of becoming a father had caused him to faint on top of Ikkaku and Mayuri had now arrived to add his contribution.

"It will be an intriguing specimen to be sure. If it does not destroy the world with brute strength, it might with intelligence. I'm curious to examine it at birth." Of course, Mayuri made Byakuya cringe and from the bathroom came Kara's own assumptions on the situation.

"I'm not having a BABY! I can't look after them! It'll be born a Hollow and eat my face off! I don't want a kid! I'm still trying to figure out where I am in life! OH! I hate men! Why can't my period turn up and yell at everyone else!" Kara screeched as she managed to pull her head up from the bowel of the bathroom toilet and turn her fearsome eyes toward the others. She did not need this kind of situation just now, especially when she had to find out a way to awaken her own Bankai and get Kira out of Hueco Mundo. Obviously Ukitake was the key, but after the incident he had just refused to talk to Kara and instead sent her baskets of Daffodils to say he was sorry for being mean and not talking to her, but that he could not forgive her for using him and upsetting Kira so badly.

"But when you have a heavy period you complain that you haven't been impregnated?" Yumichika added quite cheerfully as he leant over to help keep Kara's hair back. However, his comment earned him a very hard head-butt and he was down for the count!

"Kira! Did you just eat a Soul Doughnut?" Aizen stammered nervously as Kira began to glow a curiously terrifying hue of blue. Around her was a light that seemed divine and yet horrific, as if the very darkness had formed a body to attack them all. It was scary, and Aizen had noted how all the Espada, save Grimmjow, had willingly begun to bow before her.

"Maybe…" Kira mused with a cruel grin.

"Someone explain to me why she isn't dead from it?" Gin muttered from the floor where he was kissing Kira's shoes. Aizen just glared at him with annoyance.

"Magic!" One of the Fraccion muttered as he appeared from the fridge with more soul doughnuts for Kira to gorge upon. She was grinning happily; things in Hueco Mundo couldn't get any better for her now! She was getting proper respect, proper treatment, and now apparently had confirmed her position as a goddess. Aizen though was thoroughly annoyed; he was the attention-seeker who took them all there to begin with. So he dared to do the impossible, after fighting off snarling faces and jabbing fingers, Aizen stole one of the doughnuts for himself and took a bite. Within seconds he turned purple and was vomiting in agony on the floor. Kira looked upon him pitifully.

Kira stepped over toward Aizen's shrivelling form as he tried to huddle up to avoid the terrible abdominal pain; he looked with tear-filled eyes at his approaching goddess. Kira leant down to his side, stroked the strange little quiff of hair that slid down Aizen's face and gave him a more dashing look (in his opinion anyway) and smiled. Then she lent down, kissed his cheek, and then slammed her fists into his belly. With a gagging sound, Aizen suddenly coughed up the piece of doughnut and his face turned red as he began to get air back into his system. There was an awed silence as Kira sat down beside Aizen and patted his head slowly. Then there was a sudden eruption of praise and joy from the crowd and they scooped Kira up again, carrying her away to have a special Rave.

But something odd had happened in that moment when Kira has seen how pathetic Aizen really was. She had found herself thinking of him almost as needy as Ukitake was, but no, he was not Ukitake at all. But Aizen gave her something else, attention and love and everything she ever wanted or asked for. She had accepted the offer to join the Hueco Mundo band as queen, but what had done it? Had it been the power? NO! Now she thought over it, blushing gently at the cheeks, she was in love with Aizen! If only Kara was there, she'd eat whatever had been put in front of her as part of a long made bet. But then again, if Kara where there then it would be much more chaotic then simple praise.

"I've got the strangest urge to eat my hat..." Kara muttered with annoyance as she tried to untangle herself from the restraining bed in eleventh squad. She looked at the squad, they were waiting on her beck and call for anything she had to say. Suddenly, they took one of her "Indiana Jones'" hats from the shelf in the room and began to put some chilli powder onto it. Kara blinked at them, somewhat in horror, what were they up to now?

"It's just your pregnancy cravings!" Kenpachi assured her, beaming with his strangely warm smile.

"I told you! I'm not pregnant!"

"I feel like having a picnic today, my followers! Let us have a picnic today out by the Larva trees! It's going to be so much fun for us!" Kira yelled with excitement as she began to make some sandwiches with Wonderwice at her side. The strange, and possibly confused, Wonderwice was quite excited by the notion of going out with a pretty table-cloth and lots of tasty food. In fact he was currently trying to help make the cookies by forming irregular circles that resembled cow pats and adding chocolate chips and hazelnuts into painful smiles and sneers.

"Ooooh! What a perfect chance to make my famous chicken and ice cream sandwiches!" Gin suddenly haloed from the recesses of the fridge where Kira had been keeping the food for the reptiles. As he did so, he emerged with a few frozen chickens and some ice cream and started preparing sandwiches. At this, most of the Arrancar and Espada looked a little repulsed, but Jerff was licking his lips.

Meanwhile, Aizen was trying hard to remove Rodger the chameleon from his shoulder, apparently Yammy viewed the chameleon as Aizen because it was still wearing glasses. This confusion had fallen on Nnoitora, the gold-fish, and a couple of the low ranking Arrancar. He was looking at the delicious picnic that Kira was preparing with delight, and then he thought of something and shuddered. The Larva trees were tall Eucalyptus types by the sea of cracked earth and larva pits that sometimes spewed larva from their branch tips in a sound like a wet fart. This could prove fatal... Tousen would definitely have to come.

"Ur... Are we gonna die there, Aizen-sama?" Yammy questioned nervously to the chameleon. As the real Aizen rolled his eyes, Rodger stretched out one of his long hands and patted Yammy gently on the head with a curious blink and flash of blue on his scales, a sort of comforting blue. At this Yammy gave a cheerful smile and almost blushed. "Thank you Aizen-sama! I'm glad we won't die! And yes, I am remembering to wash behind my ears carefully! And that Giant Chicken is still in the closet."

"Giant chicken in the closet? God damn it Yammy, I'M AIZEN-SAMA! Not this flipping lizard!" Aizen snorted, and then suddenly got a tongue in the eye as Rodger told him off. Yammy just snorted and ignored what the real Aizen said, but Kira was happily giggling in the background.

"We've got to think up some way to communicate with her that doesn't seem so aggressive. I found where the entrance was, so we just need to get to her before Aizen does. She responded to your affections, Ukitake, so I think you're the one that can get her to listen. We'll have to get her alone with us and find out what's going on and whether this is going to affect us... Incidentally, why are you joining this secret meeting of the Kira Gets Back organisation, Kenpachi?" Kara blinked gently as she looked at the crowd around her, most of them squad three and four members with Ukitake, Soi Fonn, Unohana, and Hisagi around... Not to mention Kenpachi and nearly all of eleventh squad.

"The KGB? Why's that so familiar? Not much of a secret organisation really is it? There's half the Sereitei here..." Yumichika snorted gently as he continued to try and change Ukitake's hair style to make him seem a little more attractive.

"NO! I will not have us being associated with that bunch of Russian Terrorists! And don't bother trying to tell me I'm wrong Soi Fonn, I knew a couple and quite frankly they love to twist what they know and work even now, worse then the Nazi S.S. ever were... You can talk to some of the people I used to work with to find that out!" Kara snorted as Soi Fonn raised a hand and Ikkaku obediently punched Yumichika in the shoulder as punishment. The girly man made a whine and a cringy sound in upset but Kara ignored him. "And we were secret till SQUAD ELEVEN TURNED UP!"

There was a look of fear upon the faces of the squad members, they had not meant to upset their most important and pregnant member. But at her shouting, it was Kenpachi who decided to tell her off rather then his squad or even Ukitake, who was still panicking about his task in the corner. Kenpachi leant over and shook his finger in front of Kara's face, she stared weirdly at him with confusion, until he patted her belly.

"Don't upset the baby!" Kenpachi growled angrily and almost pressed his face into Kara's. It was at first amazingly intimidating and Kara leant backwards to avoid him. But with a sudden spring action of her neck, she smashed her skull against his. Kenpachi collapsed backwards with both his nose and a patch of his thick forehead bleeding. His eyes were wide open, like his mouth, and yet he seemed only mildly shocked. In delight the eleventh squad stood up and cheered Kara as the new Captain for successfully beating Kenpachi Zaraki without even using a weapon. But this served only to infuriate her more.

"For the Last time, I'M NOT PREGNANT YOU ASS..."

"Holes! There are holes everywhere around here! It's so exciting!"

"Gin... What is your obsession with holes? They aren't of any use to anything!" Aizen snorted in annoyance as he once more put a large chunk of metal in front of his face to prevent the Larva tree catching him in the eye. Gin just turned with his creepy smile.

"Only if you don't know how to use them!" Gin giggled like a little child and Aizen shuddered with horror. Suddenly behind them came the sound of screaming as Tousen was hit in the eye by one of the little larva splats.

"My Eyes! The tree has blinded me!" Tousen called, but none present were willing to mention the obvious correction. Tousen was already blind, so the trees couldn't really do anything more to him, although jets of steam poured from his glasses and he rolled on the floor in visible agony. In the meantime, Gin suddenly pulled a giant selection of sausages from his picnic basket and added his contribution to the very large rectangular blue-flowered sheet. Aizen rolled his eyes; Gin was a bi-sexual, no doubt.

Kira watched him in confusion as she noted that Aizen had only brought a selection of teas and cupcakes with him, which was basically nothing when everyone had contributed enough items that everyone would eat, or had not just gone to a Real World Supermarket with Tousen to get them. Even Tousen had brought a tin of white paint, which he had assumed to actually be a can of varying nuts. Grimmjow had been exceptionally good and brought along a few cakes he'd made, some biscuits he'd helped Il Forte make, and some meaty bites, made of Hollow and chicken, he'd spiced with the assistance of Shaw Long. Grimmjow took after his mother; if it didn't have chilli on it, then it wasn't spicy!

"Where can I put my Éclairs?" Nnoitora snorted, and he had been the biggest surprise of all. No one would have thought the chauvinist to have such a fond interest in cake and cream, yet by all accounts he had spent the greater part of the previous night baking his cream-pastries to perfection. Of course, Halibel and Kira were a little sceptical of the cream filling, but Halibel's had been a little more menacing. The great beauty had decided to make chocolate-spread sandwiches, using chocolate Body spread, but then used the best Belgian chocolate she could steal from some place called Tesco and used that to make a really delicious looking bunch of cookies. Of course, crowning achievement of the cookie patch was Wonderwice's unique and crooked looking cookie faces, which were apparently a real hit to Syzael when his own selection of GM (Grown on Menos trees) fruits were not incredibly popular.

"Sit them by the sorbet and ice cream that Stark brought… Steve, lower the parasol a little so we get shadow over them. Ah… Isn't this wonderful?" Kira beamed in delight on a deck chair that the Menos Grande had willingly setup for her, to assist in keeping her refreshed, Wonderwice was making Lemonade and adding lemon sorbet to keep it cool, and Yammy and Ulquirra were obediently fanning her with great big Ostrich-like feathers apparently from the Hueco Mundo Roc bird. She was incredibly comfortable although the Emo King looked to be a few minutes from fainting.

Grimmjow quickly flicked up a sausage roll in the air, it was burnt to cinders by a Larva spew. He groaned and then grinned mischievously as Gin opened up some cocktail wieners. Taking one of the lines of kebab skewers, which Aizen was getting ready to prepare for barbequing, along with his "Kiss the Chef" apron, Grimmjow pierced several vegetables and meaty item he was eager to roast. Then he lifted the skewer very carefully as another spew flew so close it roasted the air around it and toasted one side of the skewer. Grinning, Grimmjow turned it around to await a third spew before tucking into his skewer although Aizen was obviously slightly annoyed by his lazy cooking tactics.

"Damn straight! This is the best picnic ever!" Grimmjow grinned, and suddenly Stark raised a cocktail glass of Vodka with some M&M's floating within, a slight salute to the statement before Stark yawned and tried to snuggle back into his large bean-bag.

"AYE! Or whatever YES is!" The mass within the secret hideout called in delight to the words of their fellows. The sudden increase in members, since Kara's apparent defeat of Kenpachi and 11th Squad take-over, had meant a need to switch head-quarters. So, by convincing Byakuya Kuchiki that she needed to try and teach diplomatic tactics to 11th Squad, and that Byakuya was not permitted to attend on account of his superiority upsetting the learning process, Kara had wrangled up one of the large lecture theatres in the Academy to use. Those going past were often terrified by the roars of Yay or Nay as the eleventh squad learnt, and it was working surprisingly well thus far.

"The Floor Votes Yes, we must begin arrangements for the immediate concealment of the 11th Squad Window into Hueco Mundo." Ukitake spoke with more dominance then normal, it seemed his charismatic nature had really shone through diplomatic, uh… "Council"… meetings with the Kira Get-Back group. He was obviously quite eager for Kira Megami's safe return and the addition of so many supporters meant that the Sereitei would be on their side. But he knew there would be an issue if Kira was returned and Yamamoto decided to go for an execution game.

"The Council has voted amongst itself to leave the concealment to Kenpachi Zaraki and Mayuri Kurotsuji. We expect it to still be accessible from the other side, so no big boulders. Within the next three days, I alone will venture through the portal and make contact with the other side. Is this accepted by the council and by the floor?" Kara snorted gently. She'd really gotten into the role of Grand President and even had the gabble ready to adjourn the meeting. There were some frantic whisperings, they were all a little nervous of what to say. But soon they grudgingly accepted that the Queen of Eleventh Squad was allowed to go through on her own. "The Meeting is adjourned till next week."

Evening was falling on the lava fields, and though the sky was black in Hueco Mundo, the golden glory of the molten magma gave a weirdly romantic light to the world, even though it was oppressively hot. Kira stood on the edge of the picnic, which was being packed away, staring out at the beauty of it all. Something was primal about this part of the Hollow World, and yet so much more powerful then she could ever have thought. For some reason too, the Larva Trees had closed their buds up for the darkness, and she had been informed that the lake apparently freezes over at night, something unique geologically speaking.

"Enjoying the beauty, my Queen?" Ulquirra's voice sounded at her side, she turned to look at him with a gentle smile upon her face. She had not realised it, but Kira had been twirling her hand through her hair in thought. Something was radiant about her that evening, Ulquirra could see it, and his eyes were strangely intense. Kira was not sure how to respond at first, but the cry in the background, soon jogged her out of her sleeping world.

"I was just admiring the way the light of the magma really stands out against Gin's naked body… What the…" Kira's eyes found themselves horrifically hypnotised by the streaking form of Gin as he darted past them. It would have been more horrific, had not a good third of his body been alight. Apparently he had been attempting to test his hole theory.

"Right… I was going to ask, if I could escort you back home? If it's alright with you, My Lady." Ulquirra stammered nervously, there was an intent glow in his green eyes. But Kira just brush her hand in the air nonchalantly.

"I'm afraid Aizen already asked, but don't worry Ulqui…" Kira's lips were suddenly in a tight embrace and her body was held fast by cold yet friendly hands. She was unsure what was happening, but was sure Ulquirra had just kissed her. As he released her and she tried to come up with an argument to say, he turned away nervously.

"I'm sorry…" Ulquirra muttered fearfully as Kira's lips finally parted, as if savouring the taste. Suddenly he turned rushing back, away from her. As Kira came out of her daze she was sure she had seen a blush upon his cheek.

For a moment Kira was left standing there, stunned and shocked as she did not understand what had just taken place. But then she just shook her head and turned back to the sky. There was obviously something romantic in the air, and some part of her was fully accepting to this thought. With a sigh, she almost collapsed onto the ground to day-dream, but quickly reminded herself it was covered in ash.

"Kira! Kira! We put out the fire!" Syzael and Il Forte called out gently. They marched toward their queen, dragging a steaming and half-charred Gin behind them. A cloud of ash followed and covered up the drag lines, there was a blanket around Gin too, yet all he could do was murmur in agony. Il Forte looked up at Kira with his big sheep eyes and fluttered his eyelashes happily awaiting approval. Syzael just dropped the body with a groan, annoyed that everyone else had already left.

"Wonderful…" Gin murmured for no reason. The trio stared down at him, concern filling their faces alongside disgust. But Gin was soon unconscious and the trio shrugged their shoulders. Kira patted Il Forte's head and then sighed as she dusted the char off her hands. Syzael then bent down to prepare to carry Gin some more, only then Il Forte got playful.

"First one home's the true genius!" Il Forte bellowed and then galloped away.

"Wait? WHAT! Il Forte! Il Forte get back here!" Syzael hollered and then began dragging Gin behind him in an attempt to catch up.

Kira chuckled gently to herself, they could all be so childish and yet she admired them. Something about Il Forte was so cute, Syzael was just so much fun to annoy by countering his genius, and Nnoitora was such a chauvinist just walking and dancing in a pair of women's boxers annoyed him. Although Kira made a mental note to herself never to do that again, as Aizen had almost died from haemorrhaging and Gin had been chasing her around yelling that he wasn't wearing underwear and they should swap. Gin was kinda cute too, in his own insane way, and Aizen? There was something enigmatic and yet so pathetic about Aizen when he was around her! The kind of thing she had seen before with Kenpachi around Kara; the fact that someone so feared would suddenly seem utterly defenceless and vulnerable around the one person they truly believed in.

"Do I ever want to return home?" Kira grinned menacingly toward the pale beam at the edge of the horizon where the sun was still present. She sighed with relief, almost laughing at the thought of returning home to the fools that had not trusted her… Thinking of how her new and mighty powers would be regarded as troublesome and they'd probably make her wear something like Kenpachi's eye patch. But then her mind started to draw a face in the melting air that haze above the larva. As if witnessing a mirage she could see the gentle face of Ukitake forming and something in her heart was ripped aside.

"Our kingdom is truly glorious!" Aizen smiled gently and pressed a soft hand to Kira's shoulder, she jumped in surprise, turning to look at him. Something was amazingly masculine and controlling in his eyes, and also hungry. It was a look like on a hyena, and Kira was slightly afraid of it. But then Aizen's gaze turned away from the glory of the day and straight into hers. They melted and a warm smile came upon his face, one he almost blushed with. "I hope you still want me to walk home with you."

"Of course, you already asked and I wouldn't forget. But I have a question for you…" Kira looked a little nervously toward him, his hand crept upward and began to stroke her hair strands. It was soothing and she felt strangely comforted, and strangely safe. All fear of what she wanted and would do in her life forgotten and fallen by the way side. "Did you mean what you said before? That I would be your queen? It wasn't just a lie to get me here and for you to bed me? Only the bed bit wouldn't have worked."

Aizen seemed to pause for a moment in thought, but then an enigmatic smile formed on his face and he gave a half-hearted chuckle. He gently removed his hands from her hair, tutting as he shook his head gently. His eyes never left hers and Kira suddenly felt ashamed for even asking. Then, gently but firmly as if he wanted to make sure she understood him, Aizen clasped her hands in his own and leant in to look at her. Their noses were inches from touching and Aizen had to fight n urge to just rub them in an "Eskimo Kiss".

"You were always my queen." With that, he gently raised Kira's clasping hand to his lips. With a touch so soft and as delicate as a kiss from a butterfly's wing beat, Aizen kissed her hand. Immediately, Kira's face flushed red and she felt herself swooning from the shock of his gentility. This was a weird moment for her, and she found herself so overwhelmed she suddenly grasped Aizen around the neck, wrapping herself around him, his arms engulfing her with relish. She suddenly forgot about where her mind had been and they locked lips in a passionate embrace that lasted a mere second but something inside Kira screeched out in sorrow.

"Well done… A curtain is a remarkable tool for the job." Kara stood in front of the set of curtains that hung in the middle of the air. Part of her wanted to scream, but now was not the time. She was on a mission to bring back Kira or rather hopefully not die trying. As she moved the curtain aside, she was suddenly grabbed gently by big-eyed Ukitake, who looked terrified.

"So… The baby was just an allergy?" Ukitake muttered as the mob crowded around her. Yachiru had stopped swinging from the curtain and now everyone tried to hide it out from any view and Ikkaku lifted it up slightly.

"Yes…" Kara growled at Ukitake in annoyance. Why did everyone think she was pregnant? It was not like this when she had been pregnant with Grimmjow after all!

"You sure you want to go in on your own?" Kenpachi almost whined pitifully like a struck dog. His lower lip was wobbling and Kara could have sworn his hair spikes had lowered. She patted his cheek then rolled her eyes.

"Yes!"

"Did you remember a change of clothes in case you need to disguise yourself?" Soi Fonn then barked.

"What?"

"Did you remember to make sure no one saw you coming over here?" Mayuri suddenly darted about from side to side, staring accusingly at Soi Fonn. That was it, Kara was annoyed now.

"I haven't left the squad for anyone to see me! Damn it you lot! I'll be fine!" With that, Kara snorted her annoyance and marched straight through to the other side, clutching her zanpaktou carefully. The sensation was weird, but not unique and Kara was soon standing in an old dumping ground. With a shrug of her shoulders she began to pace calmly about, keeping her eyes and ears open in case. After a few yards, the sounds of clanging metal kept meeting her ears, but each check revealed nothing. After reaching the edge of the dumping ground, she felt a strangely threatening sensation and knew she was being watched. Slowly, Kara turned around and then quickly dove out of the way to hide behind a pile of scrap. "Okay…. I'm not fine now."