A/N: Hellllllloooooo :) I swear i havent forgotten this story. I'm just bad at scheduling and juggling other commitments. Thats enough about me though. So about this story. I reread this chapter(formerly titled aftermath) and gagged. It was terrible. So i edited it. The plot makes more sense again. Sorry for my midnight ramblings that I end up killing off.
She needed to get out of there, needed to escape the room of men who sought to control her, who sought to own her. Draco. Images of the younger blond came unbidden to her mind and she felt her anger rising once more. Taking a shuddering breath she braced herself against, the wall. She had noticed that since her brief dalliance with Malfoy had started she had had less and less control over her emotions. She frowned at the thought. She'd gone years without an outburst and now it seemed like one was always imminent, her emotions always just below the surface.
She thought back to the conversation she'd had with Severus just that afternoon.
When she and Weasley had entered the room Snape had immediately set Weasley the task of scrubbing the dirty cauldrons, while he had pulled Katrina aside to give her what appeared to be a grave lecture, if Weasley's awful tomato red flush was anything to go by. She had been thoroughly shocked when the professor had invited her into his office, closing the door and ordering them tea.
"Miss Zabini, it is most unusual for you to be so predisposed during my lecturers. I dare say that I am hurt."
She had looked thoroughly floored and Severus hid his smirk behind the cup that he brought quickly to his lips.
She couldn't fathom hurting the surly man, far less the man himself admitting it to her. She sat there, mouth agape, floundering for something to say when she saw the mischievous glint in his eye as he barely concealed his smirk behind his teacup.
Severus Snape was fucking with her.
Snapping her mouth closed abruptly she cleared her throat, thinking of the best way to address the professor.
"My apologies Professor Snape, it was not my intention to wound your mortal coil."
When she heard a loud snort of disbelief it was all she could do to contain her laughter.
"Well Miss Zabini, to what might I attribute this smiting of my soul as it was?"
He had returned his teacup to the table, fingers steepled together and Katrina was struck with how much of a muggle villain he appeared to be. That was the straw that broke the camel's back. She burst out laughing, head thrown back, hands clutching her sides and water trickling from her eyes. It was just so preposterous.
"Oh professor," she said as her laughter subsided, "didn't you hear? I am to be wed to my abusive ex."
He watched her carefully, the goofy smile that she plastered on her face mocking the seriousness of her words.
"Is that why you've had such a hard time controlling your anger?"
It was the way that he said it that wiped all traces of humour from her face. She immediately straightened in her seat, hands folding in her lap, eyes trained on the older man's face.
"I'm sure that I don't know what you mean."
"I have not the time for games Miss Zabini. My offer of help, much like my patience is finite."
She considered him for a moment. It was obvious that any offer of his involved some type of potion. It wasn't his skill or knowledge that she questioned but the man himself. She didn't know if she could trust him.
As she considered his words Severus watched her, waiting to decipher the slightest changes in body language, but none came.
"And what help might that be, professor?"
"Daft does not suit you Ms Zabini."
Snape ploughed on. "It would mean, Miss Zabini, that your abilities beyond the purely pedestrian will be dampened. You won't have access to it. Not unless you stop taking the potion."
She weighed her options. Control or power. The known or the unknown.
"Can I have some time to consider it Professor?"
Snape watched the young girl before him. For a witch so young she showed incredible restraint. Admirable really.
He nodded curtly, showing his acquiescence and effectively dismissing the conversation, before sweeping from the room.
She wandered through the darkened halls lost in thought, her feet taking her on an all too familiar path. The astronomy tower. She smiled to herself, conjuring a blanket.
"Mipsy."
She was pleasantly surprised when a moment later the small elf materialized before her. The tiny thing threw herself into her arms, her bony frame wracked with tears.
"Miss Trina, Mipsy is so glad, Miss Trina is okay."
Katrina smiled at the little old elf, resting a gentle hand on the small creature's back. The old elf was the only living creature she'd ever allowed to call her that awful name.
"Of course I'm okay Mipsy, why ever wouldn't I be?"
The old elf pulled away to fix the girl with a stern glare.
"Mipsy, is knows that Miss Trina hasn't beens eating. Mipsy is knows that Miss Trina isn't call for elves. Mipsy is knows that Missus Bini is hurts Miss Trina," the elf stated matter of factly.
Katrina lowered her eyes, unable to meet the concerned gaze of the old elf. When she felt her little hands smoothing down her hair it was all Katrina could do to keep the tears at bay.
Mipsy's voice was lower now, all chastising gone, "Mipsy is sorry that Miss Trina is hurting."
Katrina sniffled, scrubbing her hand over her face before dragging the frail-looking elf into a tight hug.
"Thank you Mipsy."
The old elf nodded, patting the girl on the head. Mipsy could still remember the quiet little girl that came to the castle all of those years ago, always in search of treats and always so kind to her and the other elves.
"Mipsy is go get Miss Trina's favourites."
Without further ado, the elf disapparated away, the crack of her magic breaking the quiet. It was barely a minute later when she reappeared, laden with all manner of treats.
"Eat!" was all the old elf said before finally disappearing for good, a broad smile on her wrinkled face.
Katrina couldn't help the incredulous little giggle that bubbled up from her throat. Mothered by an elf she had essentially adopted. How odd.
She ate quietly. Savouring her food for the first time in a long time. Her mind was brought back to her most recent problem. Draco Malfoy. Her anger bubbled to the surface at the mere thought of the underhanded blond. She could feel the telltale pinpricks on her skin that marked a magical outburst. She took a deep breath, trying to put a lid on her mounting anger. If she had any chance of surviving without Snape's help she'd need to be able to find some measure of control.
But just who did he think he was? Offering her up to his father like she was cattle. Like she was a piece of property that he could just lay claim to. He'd lied and schemed and there had never been anything that she could do to escape the situation. Shuttled off from one man to another.
When Lucius Malfoy had demanded that she prove herself worthy of Draco she had wanted to remain calm, had wanted to keep at bay the phenomenal anger that often led to her magic flaring wildly but she couldn't. She couldn't not be furious at the nerve of that arse. Of course, Lucius had provoked her, his intentions, for the most part, were clear. Ownership and power. That is what the older blond thrived on. Wizarding Britain had long since been in his pocket and they knew it. They all also knew that he was a collector of people, so it came as no surprise to Katrina that once the man was made aware of her he would try to own that part of her in some way.
But Draco. He-. Her anger flared immediately at the thought of him. He'd gone behind her back, hadn't given an iota of care to her wants, her desires. Just his. And now he owned her. The lid on her control was blasted to shit. Fucking Draco Malfoy.
She was so consumed by her ire, so taken by her hatred of the stupid blond that she didn't notice as he slipped into the room. Her magic crackled dangerously along her skin and for the first time in a long time she just wanted to hurt something, wanted to bend her magic to her insurmountable will and break something. She steadied her breathing, feeling the raw energy course through her and she tried to recreate the whip that had lashed out at Malfoy. A fluke really.
She felt her magic tenuously take form, felt the way her anger fueled her desires and she gave into it. Then she felt it. Her eyes snapping open and then narrowing at the shadow by the door. Someone was there.
Before she could think better of it she flicked her magic in the person's direction, pleased to see the whip she'd manifested only once before licking the air around the concealed person before crashing into the floor.
Draco was shocked when he was once again at the receiving end of a whip of her magic. She was so enraptured in what she was doing when he had entered that he didn't think she'd notice him there, at least not for some time. But then she'd always noticed him when he followed her. Why would now be any different?
Stepping out of the shadows and into the room he watched her face closely. Hands raised in silent surrender.
"Katrina—"
His heart thudded quickly against his ribcage.
"How dare you?! You had no right!'
She took a steadying breath, screwing her eyes shut. She needed to be in control of herself. Needed to be in control of the situation.
"Did you ever stop to consider that maybe I'd want to love the man I married?"
His heart dropped, breath stolen.
She heaved a sigh, voice quiet.
"Did you think about how your actions would affect me?"
He fought down the panic that clawed its way up his throat. He'd done all of this to save her, to have her. He would not be losing her because of it.
He closed the distance between them, needing to be nearer to her.
"I did it to save you from Higgs Katrina. I'd do anything to save you from that monster."
Her eyes were still closed, "And what of my mother, Draco? Did you think that she'd be thrilled that the boy I'd been dating, the boy she'd known I had chosen over Higgs, destroyed her plans?"
His head spun at the implication. She'd chosen him over Higgs? Had fought her mother for him?
"She's going to be on the warpath Malfoy." He flinched at her use of his surname.
"She knew about you and me before either of the betrothals. She, for whatever reason, still chose a betrothal to Terence."
Her eyes were open now, and the pain he saw there left him breathless.
"You've ruined me."
He'd almost forgotten that the next day was a Hogsmeade weekend. He stared up at the green canopy, sun filtering through the light curtains, her words playing on a loop in his mind.
You've ruined me.
He'd only ever wanted her. Higgs had destroyed her. Again. Yet.
You've ruined me.
He rolled onto his stomach burying his face into the pillow. He didn't want to get out of bed. Didn't want to face her. A distinctive female giggle a few beds down caused him to groan, pulling another pillow over his head. Blast them to hell.
He didn't know which of the idiots had a girl over and didn't silence their bed and he didn't want to stick around to hear how enthusiastic they were to be together. Ugh.
He slammed his feet onto the floor so that the pair of idiots would know that he was still in the room. He retreated quickly to the bathroom when his ruckus was all but ignored, soft moans escaping the bed that he had now identified as Nott's. Miscreant.
After a quick shower, he headed down to the common room. Katrina was sat on the couch, hair slicked back before exploding into the frizziest, fluffiest ponytail he'd ever seen. Her face was wiped clean of any makeup and he was struck by how radiant she looked. Blaise was talking to her animatedly, hands gesticulating wildly. It would appear that the twins had fully reconciled. He was glad for that at least. When her eyes snapped up to his he was reminded of precisely why he was so drawn to her. She was beautiful. Her eyes were twinkling with some unknown emotion. She seemed so self-assured and then she took him in and it turned to ash. Her face dropped, shoulders stiffened and the happiness that seemed to swirl around her just moments before evaporated.
You've ruined me.
Blaise's head swivelled around to meet him.
"Oi mate, I really ought to thank you for saving her."
"Katrina was just telling me that she may be getting out of her engagement to Higgs; said that you pulled in a favour with daddy."
Draco looked at her. She was staring into the fire, steadfastly ignoring them both.
"Yeah, something like that."
He just wanted her to look at him the way she had in the prefect's bathroom again. Just wanted another shot. I don't do second chances, people often are not worth it. His heart plummeted. There was no way she'd give him yet another chance. And now they were supposed to be married. Fuck.
"So all that's left then is for you two to get engaged, then break things off before the wedding planning gets too far," Blaise said happily, leaning back in his seat.
Draco looked at his friend, "Blaise, I can't."
The dark-skinned man looked at him sharply, nostrils flaring, anger evident in every inch of his countenance.
"Can't or won't?" Blaise asked tersely.
"Blaise stop." He hadn't expected her to come to his defence.
"Katrina he can't just - just swoop in and marry you! For fuck's sake have you forgotten about him and Parkinson?" Blaise all but screamed.
For the first time, Draco noticed the crackling energy in the air, much subtler this time than it usually was. Something about it seemed, different.
"You think I'd forget about that Blaise? It landed me in the hospital," she pulled down the neck of her sweater, exposing her shoulder which had a noticeable scar across it. Her voice was so sad as she finished, eyes finally leaving the jumping flames, "How could I forget?"
Seeing the scar only seemed to spike Blaise's anger and Draco found himself finally understanding what it was about Blaise that had kept so many of Katrina's suitors at bay. Simply put, Blaise was terrifying. The white of his eyes had bled to black and a vicious snarl twisted his mouth.
"So that's it then, you swoop in like some fucking hero to save her only to tie her to you?! You don't even respect her you—"
He cut himself off, eyes grudgingly moving upward to find his sister standing above him, her hand resting on his arm. Kneeling beside his chair, she brought them on level with each other.
"Blaise, in this game our mother is playing I'm just a pawn. I'm only valuable in that I can be sold. " She took a deep breath before she continued.
"She was going to marry me off to some pureblood wizard at some point. And I could do a lot worse than a man who finds it hard to be with one witch. I did a lot worse."
Draco couldn't fight the way his heart clenched painfully at her words. She'd seen his thoughts, had seen him try to fight off Pansy but then he remembered that he'd kissed the brunette girl back. It had been brief, but it had happened, and she had gotten a first-hand view of the event from his thoughts.
He was going to be sick.
Blaise closed his eyes, his response quiet. "I know"
When the dark boy opened his eyes again they were back to their normal state, most traces of anger gone. The twin shared some unspoken message before Katrina stood, adjusted her sweater and left.
"I just wanted to save her mate." Draco hadn't intended for his voice to come out so soft.
"That's the problem. She's never needed a saviour."
When Draco and Blaise had finally made their way down to breakfast, it was to see Katrina sat squarely between Marge and Archie. The three quietly discussing something. Blaise sat beside Archie, throwing an arm around her and dropping a kiss on her temple.
"Hello, love."
"Katrina told me that it happened again," Archie said quietly, concern clear on her face.
Blaise cleared his throat, eyes averted. "Yeah, I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize Blaise. It's just something we have to work at. It's just a part of you and I understand that. We'll keep trying."
The dark-skinned boy nodded, squeezing her shoulder gratefully.
Draco considered the dark skinned pair. They both had it, whatever it was. Hm .
Hogsmeade was difficult. Blaise and Archie were the loving couple he'd never known them to be. The elder twin basking in the attention the short girl offered. While Katrina had stayed steadfastly by Marge's side, much to his dismay.
He trailed behind the group, hands in his pocket, head down. He'd fucked things royally and now he had no idea how to fix it. He didn't even have an idea of how to get her to look his way.
The clinking of a bell overhead alerted him to the fact that they'd wandered into a shop of some kind.
Taking in his surroundings he was unsurprised to see that they were in a bookstore. What did surprise him is that it wasn't Flourish and Blotts.
He almost jumped out of his skin when a voice beside him got his attention.
"You know Draco. Staring at the back of her head from the back of the group isn't going to win her back."
His gaze met the very smug face of one Marge.
He didn't know what to be more annoyed about; that he'd been found out to be moping or that Marge apparently knew how royally he'd fucked up.
"And what pray tell would have the effect of securing me the honour of her favour?"
He was being a pompous ass, he knew. But what else was he supposed to do when her friend had come to rub his failure in his face?
If his words or tone bothered her she didn't show it. Smiling at him serenely. She was tall, he noticed. He'd venture to say about the same height as Katrina. Odd how she seemed to almost shrink in the other girl's dominating presence.
"Well Draco, maybe you should try talking to her."
His blood boiled at the condescension.
"That easy huh? Talk to her?" He sneered.
"Yes."
She'd said it simply enough and now stood there staring him down. Daring him to challenge her.
He ran a hand through his hair in frustration before swiping the other down his face.
"What the fuck am I supposed to say to her?"
"What did you say to her in the Prefect's Bathroom?"
His heart hammered wildly in his chest. How did she know?
Before he could get the question out she'd turned on her heel and left.
Well fuck.
Looking up he searched the store for the telltale frizz that would indicate Katrina's location and found himself out of luck. It would appear he'd have to comb through the stacks.
The store was considerably smaller than Flourish and Blotts and all of the books appeared yellowed with age. He couldn't recall a used bookstore before and filed the thought away for later. When he found her she was perched in a small window seat, a book hovering in front of her as her eyes quickly devoured its contents.
Taking in the aisle he found himself in threatened to steal his breath. Muggle classics. Of course.
She paid him no notice, her attention firmly on the book before her. Taking the opportunity before him, he scanned the shelves until he found it. Their book. The Taming of the Shrew.
Grabbing the book he walked over to her. Mindful of his muffled footfalls.
"I love reading Shakespeare."
He watched as her spine stiffened when he spoke and the book she had been reading fell onto the empty space with a quiet plunk.
She didn't look at him. The only indication that she'd heard him her rigid posture and discarded book.
He continued before he could lose his nerve.
"When I was a boy mother would read it to me when father was not there. By the time I could read them unassisted I'd fallen in love with the tales he told."
Her eyes slid to his face, head turning ever so slightly. His heart rate doubled.
"What would make you think that I care?"
Her words were sharp and her eyes guarded. She'd give nothing away freely. Not anymore.
He didn't shrink under her gaze and didn't look away when he answered.
"You're still here."
The words hung heavy in the silence that stretched on between them.
It was she who looked away first, eyes flitting down to the book in his hands. His eyes followed hers and he smiled softly when he realized that she had noticed the book after all.
"It's our book." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them, before he could properly process what he'd said.
It felt like an eternity before she looked at him again, the weight of the book seeming to grow exponentially. The smile slid off of his face at her carefully blank expression.
"Why are you here Malfoy?"
He wondered if she knew how her reducing him to his surname burned him. Twisted his insides until he was nothing more than a puddle of pain. Just another blond haired aristocrat.
You've ruined me.
He cleared his throat, averting his gaze and shifting his weight from one foot to the other, the book weighing him down.
He closed his eyes and took a steadying breath before he looked at her again.
"I've missed you." His voice was soft, even to his own ears, and he was shocked to hear the desperation that bled into his tone.
When she didn't respond or move away he continued, "I am aware-, I never meant to-, I-".
A deep sigh followed by a hand through his hair in frustration.
"It was never my intention to hurt you, Katrina."
"You stole my choice away from me Malfoy, what did you think that would do exactly?"
She had a point. He hadn't thought beyond contacting his father, not really. He'd certainly known that once aware Lucius would do whatever it took to acquire her for the Malfoy family. And he'd known that would mean marriage. But foolishly, in his haste, he forgot a key ingredient. Katrina. Ironic really.
She'd completely turned to face him now, feet dangling over the edge of her seat in the window.
"So, what mandates do you have of me now that you own me husband?"
The word was like a slap to the face. Husband.
She hopped down the short distance from her perch to stand toe to toe with him.
"Shall I straighten my hair?" She punctuated her question with a sharp poke to his chest.
"Do you require me to wear makeup?" Another poke.
"Am I to be meek and grateful for your salvation?" A third stab with those fucking pointy nails of hers.
"Should I-"
She'd had no time to react before his lips were claiming hers, his book, their book thudding to the floor as he gripped her face and stepped impossibly closer.
His kiss was like drowning in honey, sweet and slow and decadent and her heart beat a furious tempo in her chest.
It felt like another eternity before he slowed the kiss to a stop and her disappointment was practically tangible.
"Just be you. It's all I've ever wanted. Just you." His words a breathless whisper against her lips.
She pulled away, putting some much needed distance between them. She couldn't think when he was kissing her like that, telling her that he wanted her. Only her. She needed to remain focused. Needed to think clearly. She couldn't afford to let her hopes get wrapped up in him again. Afterall, it had taken so little for him to cast her aside the first time. No. She needed to be much more careful with Draco Malfoy. She'd need to keep her wits about her if she had a hope of getting out of this new betrothal.
He saw the moment that she withdrew into herself again. The fire that lit her eyes as she castigated him was extinguished, the desire that fueled their kiss evaporated and in their place a seemingly infinite nothingness.
She didn't say a word as she walked by him, leaving him once again, and it was all he could do not to scream out of sheer frustration.
He folded himself into the seat she had vacated in the window, past daydreams of sitting behind her as she read rushed to the fore and he shook his head as if the action would clear his thoughts.
His heart stuttered to a stop when the flipped title of the book she had been reading caught his eye.
The Taming of the Shrew.
He picked the book up, careful to keep the page she'd been so intently reading. As his eyes scanned the page the very quote she'd read from his copy of the book jumped out at him.
I burn, I pine, I perish.
