Angel knew he shouldn't be here. He knew it, but he didn't have school to distract him anymore.
He finished finals two weeks ago and since then, he'd resisted just showing up where he knew she might be. After seeing her last night, though, — after holding her, he couldn't stay away anymore.
He turned off his car and watched the swarming campus. Students gathered and chattered excited to finally be out.
He didn't know what he'd say to her or what she'd think, but he'd felt connected to her last night. He just needed to feel that again.
Noticing her blonde hair moving through the crowd, he got out of his car. Before he could call out to her, she approached another black car. He didn't recognize it, but she didn't hesitate before climbing in.
Stepping forward, he squinted. Its windows were too dirty to see through. When its lights turned on, he jogged back to his car. He told himself he wasn't going to confront them; he'd back off just as soon as he saw who she was with.
"Angel?"
With his hand on the door, he looked up. "Hey Willow."
Frowning, she glanced at the mystery car and back at him. "You okay?"
"Yeah." He placed both hands on the car roof. "Just here to pick up-"
"-Connor."
He nodded. That made more sense than trying to see Buffy. It sounded way better than stalking her.
As Willow stepped closer, the mystery car pulled away. Squeezing his keys, he watched it speed around a corner. Feeling her gaze, he kept his voice neutral. "Any idea?"
"She's getting a ride from Spike. Probably going to the gym."
"Yeah probably." Looking back at her, he saw her suspicion. She thought he was jealous. He probably would have been if he didn't know about the recreational fighting.
Buffy was depressed and deceptive. Even if she said she was just doing dinner and a movie, he wouldn't believe it. He'd bet his car it was a cover for danger and violence. Wanting to preserve Buffy's trust, he couldn't explain that Willow.
He tapped the hood of his car once. "Decide where you're going yet?"
"College? Yeah, Oz and I will be at UC Sunnydale. I guess I'll see you around."
He nodded.
She started to turn away then stopped. "Ange . . . " There was nothing more for them to say, and she knew it.
Oz came up behind her. He nodded his greeting and the three of them stood silently.
Angel pushed back from the car. "I'm gonna see if Jenny needs help."
He strode passed them without another glance. Willow's weak "Bye Angel" didn't slow him.
When he entered the computer lab, he found Jenny and Connor packing her box of supplies.
"Thought you could use a hand."
They tried and failed to hide looks of surprise.
She handed Connor a box. "Take these to the car." Fiddling with her desk, she looked at Angel. "Can you check all the machines are off?"
He started at the front of the room and worked his way back.
The last row had been theirs. Besides study hall, this was the one period they shared. Staring at her old seat, he sat in his.
During her father's trial, she'd been spacey, absent minded. One day she left her notebook behind. He'd chased her down the hall with it. When he handed it back, she blushed — that was when he noticed what was written on the open page:
Buffy Angelus
Mr. and Mrs. Angelus
Buffy & Angel 4ever
The page was a doodle tribute to them, to their engagement. She'd been excited to marry him and become his wife. He'd thought if anything changed that, it'd be him: something he did or didn't do.
He used to worry about being a good boyfriend, a good enough husband. Before the breakup, he hadn't known she worried about being a good wife. She knew her suffering hurt him and she didn't know how to stop. He shared her fear of failure. He just couldn't believe she let it win.
"Why do they stay?"
Jenny stopped her rustling. "Who?"
"My mom . . . hers . . ." He continued to stare at Buffy's empty seat.
She stood and stepped around her desk.
"Why do parents keep their children and so much hell?"
Venturing closer, she leaned against a nearby table. "When I got the call about you boys, about what happened and how she died, I asked myself that a lot. No matter how many professionals I talked to or books I read, I couldn't understand it. I couldn't understand her . . . then I met Buffy."
He frowned and looked at her. "I never –"
She held up a hand. "You'd never hit her."
"Buffy's not a coward. She fights whoever hurts her."
"And she chooses to do it alone." Her hand fell back to the table. "Buffy is an incredibly strong and compassionate person"
He nodded sharply.
She continued, "and when she first came to this school, she hide the abuse."
Yes, and it had driven him crazy. He looked down. "She told her last school, and no one believed her. Her mom and Dawn lied for him."
Jenny stared at the floor. "There were two of them in your house. If your mom had gone to the police it would have been your grandfather's and your uncle's words against hers."
He shook his head. "She didn't need to convince anyone; she could have just left . . . Buffy was just a kid."
She nodded. "And now she's 18 and choosing to stay."
"She doesn't want to. Legally, she can't take Dawn with her. She's staying for her sister."
"And I hadn't lost touch with my sister –if I'd known what was going on and asked her about it, I'm sure she'd have reasons why she couldn't take you children and leave." She felt him looking at her and met his gaze. "I don't think she was right just as I don't think Joyce and Buffy are right, but I can't say they aren't trying or don't care."
Angel's jaw clenched at hearing Buffy lumped in with their mothers. She wasn't like them.
Jenny held his condemning glare. "Buffy is one of the bravest people I've met, and she's doing the best she can, and, sometimes, that's not enough."
Her words jabbed his eyes making them sting. He noticed Connor standing in the doorway and gruffed, "How long you been listening?"
Connor shrugged.
Jenny turned to see him. She glanced back and straightened. "I know you're both worried about next week."
Connor crossed his arms. "Dawn's going away before he gets out."
"To relatives?"
Angel's blinked at the floor. "They don't have any."
"Treatment, for the . . ." he drew his finger along his arm.
"Ah."
Angel twisted his Claddagh ring feeling the heart's edge poke his finger. "Hank told Joyce he was keeping his distance unless Buffy rescinds her police application."
Connor raised his eyebrows. "Score one for Buffy."
"If he's telling the truth, then yeah." Angel dropped his hand.
Jenny sighed, "We all wish he'd received a longer sentence, but he was still convicted. One wrong step and he goes back."
Stepping fully into the room, Connor closed the door behind him. "They're closing ranks. Buffy doesn't want me talking to Dawn, and their mom finished training her replacement at work."
Jenny dipped her head. "Replacement?"
"Joyce is telling customer's she's spending spend the summer with her daughters."
Both Angel and Jenny frowned.
Connor put his hands in his pockets. "When their dad slips up, no one else is going to know."
Jenny looked at Angel, but he avoided her gaze. "When she told you to leave Dawn alone, did she say why?"
"For you, for us." Connor swallowed. "She wants everyone as far from the reunion as possible."
Angel stood, "it doesn't matter. She can take him." He walked towards Jenny's desk and picked up a box. "Nowadays, Buffy can take just about anyone."
He walked out as Jenny and Connor shared anxious looks. They knew killing his abusers nearly destroyed him. Maybe Hank Somers deserved to die, Buffy didn't deserve the consequences of killing him.
They followed Angel out of the school; no one knew what to say.
Buffy assured everyone she had everything handled, but no one person could handle this. Discussing the Summers' problem only made them feel worse about it.
Angel walked back to his car alone. Besides parking outside her house every night, there wasn't much he could do; hopefully, that'd be enough. He'd witness Hank's next fuck up, report it, and put him away.
Buffy was going to hate his plan. She'd get pissed and even more secretive, and he didn't care. After setting him free, she didn't get a say about how he used his freedom. No one did.
