Chapter 11 - Grounded
A Glimpse of Eternity
This story follows the relationship of Commander Shepard and Kaidan Alenko. There will be SPOILERS. Please see Chapter One - Anchors Aweigh for a more thorough description.
Disclaimer: I own only the individual personality of Commander Kiara Shepard I have developed inspired by the Commander Shepard in the gameplay. I do not own, nor hold any rights, to any of the characters, dialogue, storylines or any part in or of the "Mass Effect" game series. I want to thank Drew Karpyshyn and his staff of amazing writers, animators and voice actors. These are for fan enjoyment only and no money had been made on these stories.
Frustrated, Shepard pushed the data pads across her desk with a frustrated sigh. Not only was the Council not going after Saren but they'd grounded the Normandy.
Cowards.
Even Udina backed the Council's decision, posturing and politicking as he threw the Normandy's crew under the bus to advance his interest. He sold them out and Kaidan hadn't shied away from calling him on it right there in the Council chambers.
Shepard paced like a caged tiger and then finally left the confines of her room as her emotions dissipated from anger and turned into anxiety. They were grounded and there was nothing they could do. Every idea possible for finding a way to change their minds or still get out there to stop Saren had run through her head. None of it was viable.
War. They were afraid of war with the Terminus systems. Saren was going to reach the Conduit and then it wouldn't matter if war broke out with the Terminus systems because there wouldn't be Terminus systems to go to war with. The Reapers would come and destroy organic life as they knew it. She paced over to the lockers by the med bay, shaking her head at the turn of events. She fiddled with one of the knobs on the metal containers, unable to stop her mind from working in overdrive.
Kaidan was on his way to talk to her in her quarters when he hit the mess hall and saw her standing by the lockers. He'd never seen her look so defeated, so trapped. As he walked up she sighed and turned around, leaned against containers. Slowly she sank down till she was sitting on the floor, her forearms resting on her knees. How could Udina sell them out like that? How could they not believe there was more than Saren just trying to destroy the Citadel?
"Commander? Are you all right?" Kaidan asked, concern heavy in his tone, "I'm sure there's a way to appeal. We're under Alliance authority, after all. Not the Council," he said, coming to stand near her as he looked down at her.
She shook her head, "Official channels are closed. They were quite clear about that." She felt betrayed on more fronts than she could count.
"Closed. And we're supposed to accept that?" he asked, anger rising in his voice, "So, where do you think the best view will be when the Reapers roll through? If we have to sit it out, may as well get a good seat."
She looked up at him, surprised at how much of his anger he was letting show. It didn't bother her but it let her know she wasn't alone in feeling trapped, "We're out of the game for now. But I need you to be there while I figure things out."
There was a deep truth in her words. She did need him. She needed that sounding board of sanity he offered and the strength of his character. His calming influence. She needed the feel of him at her back, knowing he had her six. She need him in her life as much as she could have him for as long as she could have him.
"You know you can count on me," Kaidan said, his eyes searching hers, then added, "or any of the crew, Commander."
"I'm asking you, not the crew. Come on, Kaidan," she said, "I can get a salute from anyone on this ship. Sometimes I need a shoulder." She searched his gaze in return and was relieved when her words were met with a small smile.
"Yeah. I always leave a way out. You know that," he said softly, unable to look away. "I'm here for you. But we're in a rough spot, and the last thing I want to do is muddy things." He smirked then, "Like it's all that clear to begin with. Are we the pride of the fleet or not? Are we valued agents or just peons?"
Shepard smiled, "There you go again. Can't just pull out a good old-fashioned 'it'll be all right,' can you?" she teased, already feeling her anxiety lessening just by having him near and talking to him.
"It's that easy, huh? Okay then," he chuckled, the sound rolling through her like a warm caress. She loved his laugh and his chuckles, "Everything will be fine, Shepard. You'll figure it out."
"That's better. That wasn't so hard, was it?" she teased again. She couldn't help but take in all of him as he stood there. Every inch of him was soldier but his gaze and the way he quirked his lips in a smile showed more of his depth. It had been what pulled her in and made her want to learn more about him. What enticed her learn the intricacies that put that warmth and kindness in his gaze. She loved how complex he was yet he played it off making it all seem so simple.
Looking up at him, a realization set in. She didn't just love all of his facets or mannerisms, his laugh or what he was around her. She loved all of him.
She loved him.
That thought took her breath away. She expected alarm to flare inside her but as she watched him, there was no alarm. Only peace. She loved him and nothing in her entire life had ever felt so right as admitting that.
"I could get used to it," Kaidan said, growing serious again, "I guess we have some downtime to figure out what we are, huh?"
He moved forward and offered a hand to help her up. She needed a distraction while the rest of her brain figured out their next move. Figuring out what they were seemed like just the perfect thing, especially now that she knew how deeply her feelings for him ran. Taking his hand, she started to rise. He pulled her up with a strong tug and she rose easily. Her balance was another matter as she stumbled forward from the force of the pull and landed in his arms.
Her hands came to rest against his chest and even through his uniform, Kiara could feel the heat of him and the firmness of his muscles beneath the material. Every inch of her body responded at the feel him against her and the strength with which he held her. Around them, the whole galaxy faded from focus until it was just them. Emerald eyes met amber and neither could bring themselves to look away as a myriad of emotions coursed through the gaze. Desire and heat were present but there was more there.
She could feel the warmth of his breath playing over her cheek as they searched each other's depths, something unseen pulling them together. She didn't know what it was that drew him to her, making him irresistible whenever she was near, but she didn't care.
Slowly he lowered his head to hers, tilting slightly to the side. Kaidan ached to feel her lips on his and in that moment, Shepard would have given anything to feel his. Warm breath seared over her lips as her parted, ready to welcome his kiss. Joker's voice piped in jarringly over the intercom just before their lips met, "Sorry to interrupt, Commander. Got a message from Captain Anderson.
Seriously?! she thought as her shoulders dropped and she drew away, giving a shy resigned smile to Kaidan. He reflected her frustration as he closed his eyes in defeat and let her go as she stepped away from him. "Are you spying on us, Joker?" Shepard asked, not hiding the annoyance in her tone.
"No, ma'am. Just knew you were on the ship and figured I'd pass the message on. The captain said to meet him at Flux. That club down by the wards," Joker said then the com line clicked off. She didn't believe Joker for one minute that he hadn't been spying on them but the news that Anderson wanted to talk to her changed things. Maybe he had an idea on how to fix their problem.
Though as she looked at Kaidan, she actually felt torn for a brief moment. They had a chance to figure what they were but there was no way either would pass up any chance to complete their mission.
"Well, I guess you'd better go, then," Kaidan said with a knowing smile, the interruption not quelling any of the desire in his gaze.
Kiara could still feel the memory of him against her, his arms around her. "Suit up, you're coming too," she said, pushing her thoughts from what almost happened. And just like that, with ease, Kiara melded into the background as Commander Shepard took the forefront.
