PART 2

Chapter 1 – Part 1

1985

Dear Greg,

Well, I've been waiting for you to write to me, but of course you haven't. You're such an asshole. Anyway, I'm working a lot between the museum and my PhD work…yeah, how about that? I'm going for my doctorate. The museum said that if I worked full time, they would pay for my studies.

And once I have it, there's a job waiting for me. And not as a tour guide.

So we'll both be doctors! I know you medical ones think PhD's are lame, but I'm working for this, so don't give me any shit.

Write to me, idiot and tell me what's going on up there. Tell me about the hot chicks that you're banging. And tell me about being an intern.

WRITE TO ME!

Bob

1986

Bob,

Okay, okay, tired of your nagging. Women really know how to nag even if it's on paper.

Being an intern is hell. I never have time to sleep or do anything other than work at the hospital. The doctors treat us like idiots and the residents treat us like shit. The nurses all but ignore us. We're just a step above the orderlies – actually I think they like them better, 'cause they clean up shit. We just work twelve-hour days and collapse in a coma when we're done.

I love it.

As for the hot babes, there isn't too much time for that. But you know me, I always manage. There's a med student named Lisa with a hot body that keeps hanging around. I'm about ready to dip my wick into that pot.

See ya.

Greg

1987

Greg,

I just had a job offer from the Smithsonian. They want me to do a job that involves travel. A lot of travel. But it's a really fascinating job, so I am considering it. I would be going to other museums and archeological sites, etc. to find pieces for the Institution (please don't call it institute!).

Imagine the person who never wanted to be more than a tour guide and I may travel looking for interesting pieces for the museum.

But I may as well. With Dad gone, there's not much reason to go home. Uncle George and my cousins always ask me, but it's just not the same.

And with you up there giving them hell in Ann Arbor, well, there isn't even anyone to get drunk with.

So why not see the world on the Smithsonian's dime?

So if I take it, I'll let you know how to write to me, since I'll be on the road almost constantly.

Always,

Bob

1988

Bob,

Your new job sounds cool. And a great career for you. I'm glad you took it. I always knew you could do more than just be a tour guide.

Just be sure to let me know how to get in touch with you.

I'm still working my ass off here. This residency seems harder than the internship was. But at least I'm actually doing some real doctoring. Pretty cool.

Greg

1989

Dear Greg,

I'm so proud of you for finishing your residencies! So now you're a real doctor and can take care of patients and everything. Are you treating them any nicer? Never mind, of course you aren't!

You'd better be sitting down when you read this: I just got married! I know, someone actually wanted the fat girl! His name is Matt and he's really nice. Well, of course, I'm going to say that! Could you see me saying "I married a real son of a bitch?" Well, maybe if I married you. HAHAHA

But seriously, he's great. And he's happy with the way I look. Isn't that cool?

You ought to stop banging everything with a vagina and find one to make it permanent with. Now that you finished your residency, you need to settle down. Big shot doctors need wives.

I'm married! Isn't it great?

Always,

Bob

1990

Congrats, buddy!

So you went and got married? Wow, never thought that would happen. I mean, I knew you'd find someone if you wanted to. Just never thought you'd want to. Well, I knew you would want to, it's just…never mind.

Better you than me.

I hope he's good enough for you. Let me know if you need me to kick his ass. (Just kidding!)

Greg

1991

Dear Greg,

I think you may be right about marriage. It's certainly not what I thought it would be. For one thing, he wants me to quit my job to stay home with him. I don't want to.

And I am beginning to question why he married me in the first place because I don't think he really loves me as much as he said he did. And I think he's also cheating on me.

Oh, well, the fat girl always finds a way to smile.

Talk to you soon.

Always,

Bob

Bob,

Didn't have much time to answer your last letter. I thought once I wasn't a resident anymore, things would be easier. But the older doctors here are sadistic and they seem to think the new doctors are their personal slaves. I will never be like that with younger doctors.

I'm sorry about your marriage, buddy. I know you thought this guy was it. But to treat you like that? Cheating on you sucks. He's got to be a loser and you're better off without him.

Okay, that's pretty lame. But it's true. Don't sweat it. There's nothing wrong with going it alone. Take it from me.

Later,

Greg

1992

Greg,

Glad to hear that you're leaving Michigan. You really need to find new places to succeed in. The East Coast will be better for you. You're not exactly a Midwest kind of guy.

By the way, the divorce is final. Good that ordeal is over. I'm still here, still kicking.

Always,

Bob

1993

Bob,

I got a job in Boston, so I'm enclosing my new address for you. Kind of exciting to be actually working and making real money. Wish you were around to go drinking with me to celebrate. But it's still good.

Glad the divorce is behind you. Go forth and find new guys to screw. Ones that aren't losers.

Greg

1994

Greg,

I was a little confused with your last letter. I had barely put your Boston address in my book, and you aren't there anymore. Of course, changing jobs already isn't the wisest thing, but perhaps the New York/New Jersey area will be better for you. Try to hold onto a job for longer than a few months, asshole!

Working on lots of changes in my world too, some to do with attitude. And I'm not in any hurry to hook up again.

Good luck with the doctoring!

Always,

Bob