"What he has done, Doctor McCoy, is drive Spock's mind further away, deeper into himself. I doubt if even our best healers could now reach him."

Kirk suddenly looked at the healer, "But he was aware in the meld, he was able to show me so much."

"And yet, even after most likely having been shown how impossible Spock would find living torn as he was, you, Captain Kirk, the one who had so often proclaimed to be his friend, refused him severance. Doctor McCoy and I both heard him explain to you how the severance would be best for the two of you and yet you denied him what he needed. Somehow he was cognizant enough to know that in order for both of you to live any sort of functional life he needed that severance as much as you did, Kirk."

"I, I did not want the severance. I did not want to lose the friend I knew and who knew me better than I know myself." Kirk looked back at Spock who was still in the fetal position, still repeatedly saying, "Need severance. Need Jim gone forever."

"Did he not tell you in the meld that you both needed the severance? Did he not tell you that it was more important for you than for him as he was aware of the damage to his mind caused by what he had inhaled? He should have told you,"

Anger briefly flared in Kirk, the healer was blaming Spock when it had been his decision not to have the severance. "We did not speak in the meld. I just saw what he saw, heard what he heard. We did not speak."

The healer shook his head for a moment then nodded, "With all I have been told I should have suspected it. He still had a connection with you that let him know that it was perhaps best to let you see what he had seen, feel what he had felt, rather than allow for the emotionalism words and speech so often reveals. He was perhaps aware of how often words can be tools or weapons. He would not have spoken of the logic of a severance, he would have let you decide. Also he most likely had been confused and thought you said you would agree to a severance after a meld. With you refusing it just plunged him deeper into the state he will forever remain in." For a moment the healer just stood looking between him and Spock then looked at McCoy and said, "If you gentlemen will excuse me I will make the necessary arrangements to have him permanently placed in a facility on Vulcan. They will need copies of your records on him."

McCoy had looked from the healer to Spock and then to Kirk before looking back at the healer, "I'll," Kirk saw how he briefly closed his eyes and shook his head before looking back at the healer, "I'll have them ready in time for his transfer. Where you are placing him is,"

"It is a most respected facility for those few who have shut themselves away as Spock has clearly done. He will be well cared for."

"Have they been able to help any of their patients regain,"

"I am sorry to interrupt, Doctor McCoy, but the special facility I am placing him in has had some success in that a small percentage of their patients do acknowledge their names and will look at the speaker but that is all. The patients are all very well cared for and even taken on walks, although it is not known if they even know they are walking around. The readings taken during such outings, however, do not vary sufficiently enough to be a true indications of that awareness."

"Now ye'll be nae taking him anywhere till they sort this out." only then did the three suddenly become aware that Scotty had not left the room as the Engineer walked over to the bed Spock was curled on, and lightly put a hand on his shoulder and gave it a light squeeze before taking his hand and holding it between his own two hands, "It's Scott, laddie. I'll knock sense into them if I need ta but they'll nae take ye without a fight. Ye just relax. I'll be right here."

All three saw the slight easing of tension in Spock, "That's the lad. Ye just relax. Now I may be wrong as I nae fully understand the Vulcan mind thing but ye once told me it t'was best if the two not only showed their thoughts but spoke, in their heads, in their words. Ye said that ye needed the words for the scenes to make sense."

Spock had calmed and gave a slight nod.

"And the Captain just said ye two did nae say a word only saw what the other did. Now, ye two are gonna talk ta one another." This time the start of a shake of his head, "Nae, the Captain is here and I'll nae let him harm ye but the two of ye are gonna talk. I know ye now know all he did to ye because of that lass but I'll wager a bottle of me finest he nae told ye how he would have killed the lass when he found out what she made him do."

For a moment there was silence as Scott looked at Kirk, McCoy, and then the healer who nodded, "Now, lad, I'll hold your wrists till you find where you link with the Captain and the healer will help the Captain and you two will talk in a meld. You two are worse than two scrapping bairns at the moment and I'll nae put up with it."

The healer moved back to stand by the bed and indicated to Kirk to do the same. McCoy just stood shaking his head as he watched, "Healer T'Tonan, is it even possible?"

"Many times over the ages such a thing between Vulcans has been attempted but to no avail. There is no need to fear for Captain Kirk's safety nor his sanity as with Spock in the state he is in the meld will not be that deep nor prolonged. Those that have been attempted lasted but a few standard minutes and failed for a variety of reasons leaving the patient as they were and the one who attempted the meld with a mild what you call headache that quickly passed."

"Then there is really nothing to be gained and Kirk is,"

Jim Kirk had been looking at Spock and sat very still as he saw his friend open his eyes and look at him. There was fear, pain, doubt, and a multitude of other feelings about them that Kirk had never seen before like this swirling cauldron: and there was also, the realization shocked him as he had so rarely seen such an expression on Spock, a silent plea also there. As he looked he saw Spock's lips move and he heard a very faint he heard, "Jim, words."

He nodded and was beside the table looking down at Spock before McCoy and the healer seemed to realize what was happening. Very carefully he placed his fingers where the healer told him to and once Spock's fingers where in position both Scotty and the healer stood back with McCoy.

This time Kirk realized the meld was very different. Deeper and with more emotion and he heard Spock's voice, almost shaking with emotions, "Jim? I am sorry but I, I need the severance. I, I am having difficulty with emotions. I can no longer serve as your First Officer. I, I am too damaged."

"This whole thing is my fault Spock. I let myself get involved when you warned me. I let her walk around the ship on her own, I did not realize that she was drugging me."

"I should have, have noticed that, Jim. It was my duty, duty as a First Officer and, more importantly, as a, as your friend to notice such changes. You were attracted and,"

"And I trusted her more than you. Can you forgive me?"

"There is nothing to for,"

"Don't you dare even think that, Spock. What I said to you on the bridge, I, I could kill her for what she made me say to you. When I went and saw her she admitted she did it all because of me, of how I relied on you, of how I had ignored her so many years ago. You did nothing that I need to forgive. I am the one who wants, needs, your forgiveness."

"Jim, you need the severance, need more than I. I, I am damaged. I am too damaged. My physical damage is healing but, but I, I find great difficulty in remember, remembering even the most basic, simplest things related, related to my position. The fumes. I was aware of the fumes. On the bridge and in Engineering. Had to get crew safe. Had to secure the ship. Had Scott take charge. He, Scott, understood. Knew in Humans only head,, headaches but in Vulcans damage."

"The way you are recovering I am sure it will not be long before you are,"

"Please, Jim. We have no way of know, knowing how long, if at all, I will be as I was. Being hybrid, dual unknown factors. The severance will enable you, you need to remain the Captain. You do it with a new First,"

"Now you listen to me, Spock. You are my First Officer and I do not care how long it takes but you will fully recover. You are also my closest friend and I know together we will get you back to how you always were."

"Jim, you must be,"

"You were not about to say logical, were you? Surely by now you know I am not logical in any way when it comes to my friends."

Through the link Spock felt the guilt that Kirk was finding unbearable, "I also know you feel a, an unnecessary guilt for things, what you are not responsible for."

"And you, my Vulcan friend, incorrectly believe that by having the severance I will be content with a new First Officer." Through the link Kirk felt a twinge that let him know he was correct, "There is no way I could ever be the man, let alone the Captain, that I am without you with me, beside me. I will not have another First Officer. I will take a desk job but will never have another First Officer." There was such certainty and truth in Kirk's words that Spock had to control his breathing so as not to get lost in emotion.

"Jim, we must face proven facts. Fact, I am damaged and, and of little use on the ship. Fact, you need a Chief, Chief Science Officer and a new, new First Officer capable of the roles. Fact, there is no, knowing, no way of knowing if I will ever, ever fully recover and, and just how far I may recover. And, most importantly, is the fact you, James Tiberus Kirk, are meant to be, be a starship Captain."

"And let us not forget the fact that just this a few hours ago you were in great physical pain before we all allowed to see you. You cannot tell me that you did not fight your way,"

"Mister Scott, against my, my orders and wishes, took almost all my emotional and, and most of my physical pain from me. He insisted in doing so and, and with Healer T'Tanton left me, me little in the way of objecting." Kirk got the distinct sensation of Spock almost laughing as he recalled how Scott had just said what he was going to do and why. "He is, was most kind to do so and I, I trust that he had no ill-effects."

Kirk remembered how the Chief Engineer had walked out and been only too pleased to sit and drink the coffee Uhura had handed him, how tired he seemed but also how the coffee seemed to revive him. At the time he had thought it just the upset of seeing Spock as he was. He would have to talk with the man later, there was,

"Jim, he would not want you, you or the others to know. It is his way. It was only as Healer T'Tanton was easing, easing our minds apart, we had needed his assistance in the trans, transference of the pain, that he quickly said, said to say nothing to the others. You must not let him, him know you know, I know you will want to but for him, for me," Spock remembered but did not allow that one moment to show in the meld, the moment when Scott had started to leave but had stopped and looked back at him, how in that briefest of moments he somehow heard the Scotsman say, "Thank ye, laddie, for saving me, ma ship. and all who sail on her."

"The others won't hear about it from me and I will be sure not to mention it to Scotty."

"You have gone, gone still and quiet, Jim. What troubles you?"

"How I am going to tell Healer T'Tanton you will not be leaving the Enterprise and then finding a way to explain to Command the reasons for the temporary placement of the two officers in your roles."

"I still believe that a severance,"

"Is a closed subject, Mister. We will work on getting you back to you now that you have accepted that I will never have another First Officer." Kirk looked at his Vulcan friend for a moment and through the link Spock could tell his was noticing how tired the Vulcan was. "Right now I think,"

"I will rest now, Jim. Even talk like this, this tires me. We will talk later."

"If you need me or anything you know,

"Later. I will sleep now, now for a few hours." from how vague Spock was Kirk knew he was still not himself but made no comment. The true extent of Spock's exhaustion and confusion was clear through the meld and Kirkk chided himself for not realizing it sooner.

"Rest now. Just know I will be back, we will talk more then, and you are going to get better. Rest now."

"Yes, my t'hy'la."

T'hy'la echoed in Kirk's mind as he eased from the meld. T'hy'la echoed and with it came a strange peace and warmth. No Vulcan healer nor doctor as skilled as McCoy was going to take Spock from him. His friend would recover. Kirk knew it would take time as Spock was clearly having difficulties but he would recover.

He was aware of the healer looking at he as he took the cup of coffee that McCoy held out to him. When he looked at Scott the Engineer smiled and nodded, "Now I'll leave him ta you ta care for till I've checked Engineering. Got two new ones in there that amaze me they can breathe without being told how. At least they'll nae be with us when we leave. Some of me own crew have made excuses to nae have to work with them. I have them going over the before and after of the refit ta find seven dozen changes that were needed."

"Seven dozed? Were there that many?" Kirk was surprised as he had not thought the damage so extensive

"Aye, seven dozen when ye take into account each point that must be fused, every chip of paint that must be covered." Scott smiled as he looked at Kirk and Kirk saw the mischievous side of the man dance across his face, "But I imagine the two will still be trying to find out what twelve times seven is."

"They cannot be that bad, Scotty." McCoy tried not to laugh.

"Ah, man, they nae even know how many inches in a hand. Makes me wonder if they still have on their nappies. I'll check in on the lad later."

Both McCoy and Kirk saw the bewilderment on the face of the healer, "Our Chief Engineer does not, as they say, suffer fools lightly, and tends to test the ability of even those first year cadets that we presently have for a few days. Many either rethink their career choice or take on the challenge. As to calling Spock lad, it is just something he does as he is not only one of the more officers in experience but also in age." Kirk found himself smiling, "I have to admit that there have the times when he has called me lad or laddie. He has great respect for his fellow officers but I think you'll find he and Spock have a very deep respect for one another because they are both annoying near perfectionists when it comes to their work."

"It has been evident, from their first interaction, that there is a great understanding between them. The way that Mister Scott was able to reach into Spock when we had failed. I must speak with him before I make my report as what he has done has never been recorded in such cases or any case involving Human and Vulcan relationships. As I will still be here for another three days before I must make my final decision as to future care of Spock I trust I will be allowed time with Miser Scott."

"Your, your final decision as to Spock's future care? I, I would have thought what you, what we just saw would," Kirk half-stood as though to challenge the healer and slowly sat down. Procedure. Must follow procedure. They were at a Starbase and Command could and would side with Healer T'Tanton.

"While being able to maintain a meld for so long showed most remarkable progress has been made can you honestly say that his communication was flawless? Can you honestly say that he spoke with no long pauses and that at no time did he repeat words?"

When Kirk remained silent the healer nodded, "I will reassess him in three days. This is a most interesting study, Captain Kirk. While I still believe that Spock will need to be placed in a special facility when I first evaluated him I believed he would forever be totally vegetative. I now see that he will fit in well at the facility I had selected as they have a unit that will provide him with mildly challenging mental activities. When I assess him in three days I will have a better approximation of how his further progress may go."

McCoy looked from the subject of their discussion, having satisfied himself that Spock was sleeping, "What if there is a substantial change for the better in Spock in those three days?"

"Please define what you mean by substantial, Doctor."

"Oh hell, what if he is able to have a fairly long complicated scientific conversation and debate one of the sides with that blasted Vulcan exactness?"


A/N Hope you all have a great 2016 and see as many of your hopes and dreams as possible became reality. This is much longer than usual as I will be away for about two weeks thanks to weather and medical matters. Enjoy. HAVE FUN!