Okay, my plans wasn't to write this chapter as quick as I did, but the words never ended. It was a hard one to write but I think/hope that you feel what Bella feels. I feel very sorry for her. It will be one last chapter or epilogue after this, I haven't decided yet.
I put my phone in my bag, and zipped up the backpack, roughly.
"Bella, what are you doing?! Give me the phone!" I had never heard Angela raise her voice like that and I was surprised.
"Take it easy, it's nothing. No need to worry now. Let's eat." Thou I was the one who should be calmed down, I was the one who tried to calm Angela down, her frantic voice gave her fears away and I started to see what she meant. Maybe I should take this seriously? But things like this, a stalker didn't happen to me, so why worry? To take in the fact that I was stalked, that someone wanted to hurt me was strange.
Ben looked at me, astonished over how I reacted. He opened his mouth like a fish, but couldn't figure out what to say. "Ben. Food, eat." I urged him. He took his tray and moved forward in the lunch queue.
I had lost my appetite when I got the messages in my phone and only bought an apple. Once again Angela eyed me nervously. She wasn't the one to nag about things and I saw in her face how she argued with herself how to deal with this situation.
We all sat by our usual table when the others joined us.
"Hi Bella, I was wondering, what kind of car does Jacob use?" Mikes voice startled me, I was thinking about the letter and the messages.
"Eh, a dark maybe? Older one?" I wasn't sure, I was no good with cars.
"Okay, there's a dark car parked by the curb just outside the school park. I don't recognize it, an remembered that Jacob had a dark car. You know all this about child molesters. But maybe someone in school just bought a dark car, like one of the teachers perhaps." He took a big chunk of his hamburger and chewed loudly.
Maybe a coincidence? My stalker from Port Angeles had a dark car. "Yeah, maybe it's a teachers car." I shrugged and tried to concentrate. Not Jacob, that was a stupid thought. His dad, Billy and Charlie were the best of buddies. He couldn't do this…Or could he? Actually, he had been around very much lately, and seemed to know what I did and when. His need to see me and how his reactions when I mentions my friends. I shook my head, I was analyzing too much into this, and I felt sick about it all.
We all ate under silence, thinking about what had happened. I saw how Angela whispered to Ben and I was sure they talked about me as she looked at me with horror in her face. I took a small bite of my apple and chewed slowly. The red apple glistened in the sunlight from the windows surrounding the cafeteria. All the tables were full of kids in different ages, gossiping about who dated who. Normal stuff. And here I was, no legs, no love in my life, no dad and alone, to take care of myself. I felt a bit jealous, they seemed to have it easy and I wanted to be that carefree kid who's biggest concern right now was which college I should attend to.
The bell rang, time for the last lessons for the day, and then I needed to make a decision about what to do. Forget and hope that this was a joke of some kind or report to the police. Ben followed me close to the class by my side, Angela walked of to hers. My phone was quiet during the last lessons, and I thought someone maybe pulled me a prank, a terrible, useless joke of some kind. When the bell finally rang again, the school was over for the day.
I wheeled myself out to the parking lot. Angela ran after me, calling my name.
"Bella, Bella, please stop!" Her anxious voice reached me and I stopped. "I'm sorry if I did or said the wrong things at lunch, but I'm so worried about you. From what happened last fall, and loosing your dad. And now this? How can anyone survive? How much can a person take before he goes insane?" She talked fast and almost stumbled on the words while she took my hand. "I don't mean you are insane, but you've been thru all this and still function. I couldn't do that, you are so strong and I envy you. But please, let someone else into your life! You can't deal with all this alone, you need help! Please Bella, let me call the police!"
"I can't…" If I did break my wall, who could catch me and help me? "Leave me alone Angela, I can't talk about this now. I need to go home." The only place I felt secure in, my home, Charlie's home. I hurried away while I heard Angela's voice calling my name behind me. I focused her voice away, to think about my room, my safe place. Then I saw I dark car pull in beside me, I hesitated but stopped. I recognized the car.
"Bella, I thought Angela could take you home?" His voice was calmed and a tiny bit excited.
"No, she couldn't, she had to take her siblings to a party." At this point I felt the wrong kind of butterflies in my stomach.
"Okay, get in and I'll take you home."
I had to clear my throat, "No it's okay, I need the fresh air and I need to think about things." I tried to go forward but he drove his car also forward a few yards, blocking my way.
"Just get in Bella, I don't wanna argue here."
"No!" I tried to emphasize my no so he understood that I didn't want to go with him home.
He lowered his voice until it sounded like a hiss, "If you don't join me in the car now, I will come out and make you get in the car."
My eyes got wide and my mouth opened slightly. My entire body became stiff and I couldn't move because I was so petrified. Far away I heard how he opened his car door and got out. As he came closer he looked around, to see that we were alone. No one was around and he easily grabbed me and threw me into the front seat. He closed the door with more power than he needed and hurried around to the other side. "See, I told you so!" He screamed.
"So, Jacob, it was you all the time. Following me from Port Angeles. Leaving me the letter and those messages…" As I said the words the facts slowly opened my eyes. Of course it was Jacob, he wanted me, he always did even when I already was taken. I didn't have any feelings for him, and he knew that. That only triggered him to want me even more in a sick way, to make me love him, force me.
"Of course it was me, you must be a stupid little girl… I thought you were smart, and figure it out earlier. But no loss for me, I could continue to scare you. That was fun! Those messages, the letter! My imagination skills is pretty good, don't you think?" He laughed loudly and I wrapped my jacket harder around me.
"Why are you doing this to me?" I wanted an answer.
"Easy, I love you Bella like nobody ever loved you before. I want to have you and if you don't want me, then no one can have you, that's how it is." He stepped on the accelerator and the car screamed in protest. I had heard that sound before.
"Where are you taking me?" My voice were so low I thought he didn't hear me.
"To your house at first. You need to take some belongings. Then of to Las Vegas baby, you need to have a ring on your finger to show everyone that you're mine." His unshakable self confidence voice shined thru his words.
"And if I don't want to do that?" My hands trembled with fear.
"Bella, honey. No one accept me want you. Who would ever want to have you? The ones you love die, or leave you. They couldn't take care of you like I can. I'm the man you have been missing in your life. That boy you had before, he didn't love you enough so he left you. I wouldn't do that! He couldn't stand to see you're miserable face… But I can. We're gonna have a small house in La Push, and three kids. You'll be a stay-at-home mom and do what I tell you to do! " He spitted out the words.
At this point he gotten to my inside, my core. My Edward. His name ripped my inside into two pieces. I wanted to believe that he did love me, but on the other hand, why did he then leave me if he loved me? My eyes flooded and my tears ran down my face. All the feelings connected with Edward was out and I couldn't hold them back. It felt like my stomach was inside out, like Jacob had taken his hand and ripped my heart out and thrown it away. I was empty, a shell with all the feelings outside. I cried so much that I didn't realize that we were already home.
"And Bella, " I heard his velvet voice by my ear. "you know, it's easy to manipulate the breaks on a car…" I turned my head to face him.
"What do you mean? Are you saying that you caused the accident?" I couldn't believe what he was saying.
"Yes, if the breaks had worked on the cruiser, you had been able to avoid that other car but the slippery road made the accident ever more power full then I thought. I was planning that you hit a tree and then I could end Charlie's life if he'd survived the accident. But the weather goods helped me." The rage washed all over me in a second, and the fact that I was already broken down with sorrow over loosing Edward and Charlie made me blind with fury.
I grabbed whatever I could get a hold on and hit Jacob as hard as I could in the head. I screamed with raged as Jacob fell backwards in his seat, his eyes rolled back and blood from his temple flooded out. I was panicking and hurried to get out of the car. I didn't care to see if he was alive or dead, I needed to get out of there so I crawled to the front door as fast as I could. It was almost impossible to see anything, my tears clouded my view. I nearly didn't have any power left in my arms when I was in my house but with a last effort I pulled myself up in the elevator chair.
When I got up I knew what I had to do, there was nothing left for me. I took all the medicines in my bathroom cabinet I had and wheeled myself into my room. A glass of water was already on my nightstand from that morning. I pressed play on my CD and as the first tones from the song Encounters came out from the speakers I took the first pill. When the second song, Seven lives, started all my pill-boxes were empty, sleeping pills combined with heavy morphine made my eyelids heavy.
I laid myself on top of my bed and closed my eyes. Somewhere downstairs I heard my cell phone ring, but I felt to heavy to move. There was nothing more for me now then to take one last breath and hope that death was better then life, with no sorrow or heartache. As I slipped away I saw Edwards face in front of me, his crocked smile and his gentile eyes filled with love.
As usual, if you like it, review! It means a lot and I save them all! :)
