My dear little broccolis💚💚💚
~ So I know, I have been gone since ... forever. Haha. Sorry. But I am back. I hope that you are still on board with me. I promise I will try to take less time for the next update.
~ Also, know that I created a playlist on Spotify with the songs that help me write the stories. It is called "Fanfics for my little Broccolis". If you want to check it out, it is made for you (and for me, so I don't have to look through all the songs I have when I am in a special mood, haha)
~ Anyway, I hope you'll like this chapter just fine
Love, Mina💚💚💚
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Chapter 11: Why Not Kaelie? (2,0K)
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Jace's PoV.
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Dernière Danse — Kyo
All Of Me — John Legend
Real And True — Miley Cyrus, Future, Mr Hudson
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I am laying on the couch, my eyes fixated on the ceiling as I do my best to forget about my morning. And those past few days in general. Life has just been awful, lately.
First, there is Pixie who took off like I tried to kill her. She literally took off. After wandering in the streets for hours looking for her, I went back to Valentine's, only to find a note from him informing me that he was dropping Pixie at the airport so she could go find her Mom. I don't understand this girl. I really don't understand her. She's a freaking conundrum.
I mean, we were having such a nice time just the two of us, and now she fled away. And now the nightmares are back. And now, I am back in that zombie state where I don't sleep during the night and I doze off during the day.
This morning, I tried to do something about the nightmares. I listened to Pixie's advise, and I went to see my 'father' in order to forgive him. I went to that awful place that they call clinical prison. Because that jerk attempted suicide, they declared him mentally unstable. And though I agree on their verdict concerning his sanity, I don't agree with the punishment. His 'jail' seemed way too nice to me. He had a freaking TV in his room. And flowers. And when I left, he was about to play bridge with other 'inmates'. I hate how comfortable he is. I hate it with all my being. And that makes it even harder for me to forgive him.
I remember how I tried. I really did. Pixie said it would help with the nightmares. She said that it would help me. But I'd take the nightmares rather than saying to his face that I forgive him. I just can't. He took my Mom from me. He destroyed my life. He forbade me to present a grandmother to my future children. He forbade me to see my mother's eyes gleam with pride when I'll get my diploma. He made me abnormal. A nutcase with a shady past. I just can't forgive him. Pixie is delusional about that. Some things just can't be forgiven.
As I keep on staring at the ceiling, someone suddenly rings the doorbell, and I completely ignore it. I'm not expecting anyone, and the three people I actually know in this town wouldn't bother with ringing. So instead, I do the thing I do best since Pixie took off, I think about her. About her, and I, and what happened between us.
How did I let myself fall in that routine that Pixie brought to me? Now that she's not here, I really realise how everything I did was centred around her. From the moment I would wake up, to the moment I would sleep, everything I did was Pixie related. And this is bad. She's the one who told me to find a girl to forget about my problems, and I did. But I highly doubt she ever meant it as herself. And even if she did, the way she ran away from me after the karaoke definitely put a barrier between us. Because I'll never be able to forget that look of pure fright she had when she looked at me. She even had goosebumps for Heaven's sake!
The doorbell rings again, and I keep on ignoring it, until the stupid person who's outside endlessly buzzes.
I unwillingly get up, cursing at whoever is behind the door, and go open it, only to find a blond girl behind the door. Kaelie. I'm about to snap at her, when I remember that she's actually nice. She's not as bitchy as she looks. So I try my best to sound polite as I asks her: "What do you want?"
"I can't reach, Clary," She simply says, clear worry in her voice and blue eyes.
I inwardly heave, trying to count the days since the karaoke. It's only been two days, but it seemed like forever to me. That's bad. I'm not supposed to feel like that about Pixie.
"She flew out of state to meet her Mom I don't know where."
"So she's in New York?" Kaelie asks with a slight relief.
"If that's where Pixie's Mom is," I tell her, trying to sound as detached as I could.
But actually I do care. A lot. I never actually asked Pixie about her Mom. I know she doesn't like talking about her father, so I never pushed the issue. But I never actually asked about her mother and why she wasn't living with Pixie. From what I could tell, it was normal for Pixie to have the house for herself. Hence the her often being at Valentine's. And yet, I never tried to know why.
Kaelie raises an eyebrow at me, and I can tell that she wants to get in my pants. I have to say that I forgot about this. This look girls would give me when they would see me. I used to have that a lot in my old town. But after the event, I only got pity looks. So I stopped noticing the way people would look at me.
"Can I ask you something in all honesty?" She asks, and I nod, leaning against the frame. "Are Clary and you together?"
"Nope," I tell her, knowing that she would ask this question. I just knew it. I know how it looked like at the karaoke. It looked like we were a couple. And for a second, I wished it were true. I tried to make it true. But that scared Pixie.
"Then why do you call her Pixie?" Kaelie insists, and I immediately shoot back:
"Why does she call me Jace?"
But as I'm saying so, a little twang squeezes my heart. Because she stopped calling me that. She literally called me Jonathan Christopher. She created a barrier between us that seems way too high and too thick for me. Pixie is the one who said that she refused to call me Jonathan, and yet she did it.
"So there's really nothing between you two?"
"Why? Did she say there was?" I say in a mocking and detached tone, a small smirk on my lips, and Kaelie looks down on her shoes as she answers:
"Clary rarely talks about her love interests to anyone but Jon. But, when I asked about you, she told me to stay away."
She mumbled the last part, and this makes me raise an eyebrow. Girls like Kaelie don't get shy like that. They just say what they want, knowing that they'll get it.
I don't reply anything to her, thinking about this piece of information, and wondering why Pixie said that to her friend. Any other girl, I would have said without hesitation that it was so she could have me for herself, but it's Pixie we're talking about.
I am so lost in my thoughts, that I don't hear what Kaelie says to me, until she heavily clears her throat.
"Sorry. You were saying?"
"Nothing," She replies, looking down on her shoes again.
I swear that she's naturally blushing under her makeup. Well, I think she is. It's hard to actually tell. Silently, I check her out, and I smirk to myself as I understand what she just said. Well, she probably didn't say it, but her clothes did it for her. She came to be fucked. Or in the hope to be. That's why she wants to be sure that she's not betraying her friend, first.
For a long moment, I ponder the possibility to send her away, but then, it hits me. The better way to forget about Pixie, is to fuck someone else. I have a willing girl in front of me, I should totally use the opportunity.
"Do you want to come in?" I ask her, everything in my tone indicating that I'm not inviting her to drink tea in front of Gossip Girls; and Kaelie's eyes sparkle of anxious anticipation at that. I find it slightly odd, because this anticipation wasn't the thing I was expecting. Desire, lust, hunger. Not anxious anticipation.
I close the door behind her and lead her to my room (because the living room is a Pixie room), and once we're there, I can see her swallow hardly. I guess she's more shy than I anticipated.
"If you don't want to do this, you can just leave. It's okay," I tell her, and she vigorously shakes her head, taking a step toward me and kissing me.
I immediately react, doing my best to ignore the fact that she's not Pixie and that she feels so different from her, and I shove her on the bed, hovering over her. Kaelie's eyes widen when I take off my shirt, and then I lean back to kiss her again, closing my eyes as my hands trail to her short skirt to wind it up.
She slightly moans when I start rubbing myself against her, sounding surprised; and when I get rid of her skinny tank top, I can feel her hesitation. I stop, upping myself so I could stare at her in the eyes, and I tell her once again: "Like I told you, you can leave if you don't want to do this."
Kaelie strongly shakes her head, and then she murmurs, her eyes avoiding mines: "I do. It's just that … It's my first time."
At those words, I roll on the side, picking my shirt on the way. She's a freaking virgin. That's why Pixie didn't want me near her. She knew. I get up, buttoning my shirt as Kaelie is looking at me with teary eyes. I guess I should have known. The way she acted wasn't that slutty. I kind of feel bad for her.
"I'm sorry, Kaelie. I don't do virgins. And your first time shouldn't be with someone who uses sex as a mean to forget," I tell her, and she looks down, probably to hide the tears in her eyes. She straightens her cloths with a little sadness, and I scratch the back if my head. I really lost my game. I never found myself in this situation before, because I always had a six sense about virgins.
Kaelie walks to the door, and so I apologise again: "I'm really sorry, Kaelie."
She turns to look at me, and suddenly, I am not facing a virgin anymore, but a girl who knows what she's about. She looks deeply in my eyes, and tells me: "If you like Clary, you should just tell her, instead of trying to forget her. I might be a virgin, but I can read between the lines, Jace. Sex won't make you forget about someone who almost lives with you."
And on those words, she leaves me alone with my thoughts. I slump on my bed, thinking about what she just said, but it's not like I can tell anything to Pixie. She turned down her phone, and I just learned where she currently is. And it's not because I like Pixie, that it means that Pixie likes me back.
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💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚
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~ So, see, no cliffs. I am not that evil. Hope you liked it.
~ And now, question time:
` 1. What did you think of Kaelie's reveal?
` 2. What did you think of Jace in this chapter? Do you think he'll tell Clary?
` 3. What is your favourite part?
Anyway, Cassandra Clare owns the names of the characters from the Mortal Instruments franchise, everything else is mine.
Kiss💋 Kiss💋 Bang🔫 Bang🔫.
