Chapter 11 b is coming within the next 6 hours i'd say, so stay tuned. I originally wrote them together, but i felt the chapter was way too long so i split it in half.
I sit on the couch with my knees to my chin, the local newspaper squished between my chest and thighs and my gaze is firmly on my feet. The significance of tonight's date is weighing on my mind. It's not that I don't want it, I do, it's the fact I want it too much that's scares me. I feel Holly's eyes on me, studying me no doubt, perhaps wondering what's going on in this crazy brain of mine. I lift my chin up to check she's still there and not just a figment of my imagination.
Holly raises the hot coffee to her mouth and blows on it. She pokes me in the leg with her toe from the other end of the sofa. "You're regretting your decision now aren't you?" She asks anxiously, stroking the cup with her thumbs.
I look back down at the newspaper in my lap. "Population 2500." I can't help but roll my eyes at this statistic, as this doesn't help with my current dilemma.
"We could always wait until we get back to the city?" She says in a reassuring tone, trying to relieve me of any pressure I might be feeling.
I immediately look back at her. "No!" I say sharply then return my eyes to the paper. "I don't want to wait" anymore I grumble. I see Holly smile into her coffee from the corner of my eye, suddenly relieved of any doubt she may have had that I wanted to do this.
"Well, it's official!" I smack down the paper onto the coffee table. "There is fuck all to do in this town."
She drops the cup from her lips to her lap. "Don't be ridiculous," she says shaking her head at me. "I really don't mind where you take me, I'm just glad you asked."
I slump heavily back into the sofa. "There is a reason I don't do this stuff you know," I pout.
"What's wrong with just grabbing dinner?" She asks.
"Dinner? I think you deserve more than just dinner if you are going to have to put up with my sorry ass." Don't you get it? I'm not good enough for you.
Holly takes off her glasses and rubs the sides of hers eyes with her fingers. "Gail, please... "
"See? I'm already driving you crazy and we haven't even... I'm n..."
She leans forward and puts her finger to my lips. "Shut up!" She whispers.
"...not easy" I continue as she removes her finger.
"And I know it. I can handle you and your various neurosis." She smiles.
"My neurosis? What neurosis?" I quip.
"Don't go climbing that tree just yet, okay? Just sit on the ground and lick those paws." She says with her hand on my foot. That damn cat! I knew that analogy would come back to bite me. That's the last time I open up to a complete stranger.
I sit up straight and take in a deep breath. "I will try harder," I promise.
"Gail, you don't need to try harder, you're not doing anything wrong" she insists, as she slides her glasses onto the top of her head.
"No, I mean I'll try harder to find something for us to do tonight." I smirk.
"What's tonight?" Asks Steve as he walks into the room, obviously overhearing the end of our conversation.
Holly looks at me for the answer, but there is nothing. "Well according to your sister and this local newspaper," she picks up the paper from the coffee table, "fuck all." She muses. I am such a coward.
"Oh, I see" he laughs. "Did Trace tell you guys she and I are going to visit some friends of hers this afternoon? They live not too far from here." He says from the kitchen.
"She did mention something, yes." I smile happily at the convenience of the situation, but in the back of my mind I have that nagging feeling Holly is going to hate me for being so secretive about our relationship. Wait, is this a relationship?
"When will you be back?" Holly asks a little too keenly. She definitely is not one who can hide her feelings, unlike me, the master concealer, queen of the permanent scowl, however she, can read me like a book. Something I kind of hate and love at the same time. Stop worrying, she likes you, for now at least.
"Probably not until very late. Traci hasn't seen these friends in quite a while." He says as he walks over to us. "Did you guys eat yet?" We shake our heads in unison, our toes now playfully touching.
Steve grabs my hand and pulls me over the top of the couch. "Gail, get up. We are going to the market." He drags me to towards the front door. "We're gonna make brunch for these lovely ladies."
"I didn't know Pecks could cook" Holly says, looking a little bewildered at his forceful actions.
"We can't!" he laughs as I elbow him in the stomach. He immediately retaliates by pinching me in the neck with his free hand.
"You know..." Holly drags out "seeing as you will be in town, you could take this opportunity to figure out what we can do tonight." Pushy much?
"Can I at least put some pants on first?" I violently shake my arm from his hand as he hunches down to catch his breath for a few seconds.
"You are letting Gail choose this evenings activities? Why would you let her do that?"
This time I go for a punch to his straight to his stomach, but he deflects my hand, spins me around, and bear hugs my arms into my chest. Shortly after, he releases his grip and pushes me forward. "Get your pants on then."
"Good idea. I probably should do that too." Holly says and makes her way towards the bedroom shaking hers head at our childishness.
"I'll be in waiting in the car, boofhead," Steve says, closing the front door behind him.
I walk into bedroom where Holly is sitting on the bed and I close the door. "Are you guys always like that with each other?" Holly asks as she pulls a sock on.
"That out there? If you had a brother you'd understand." I chuckle. "It's all in good fun." She doesn't look convinced. I feel in this moment I need to defend myself for some reason. "I don't generally go around hitting people" I say a more than a little concerned that I am being judged right now.
"Oh I know, I didn't mean... I suppose, I've never really hung around siblings before. You guys are super cute though."
"Cute?" I smirk. I playfully jump onto the bed and push her down by her shoulders. I grab her hands and pin them down beside her while climbing on top of her.
"This feels familiar" she grins licking her bottom lip.
"What? You've never fought with anyone before?" I ask.
I hear a knock at the door. "Gail, you in there?"
It's Traci. I quickly sit up, still straddling Holly, and whip my head sideways towards the bedroom door, blowing the hair out of my eyes. "Um, yeah be out in a sec, just changing" I reply, frozen, Holly wriggling underneath me.
"That's ok, can you remember to buy some milk while you are out?"
Holly chooses this time to start tickling my ribs, but I catch her wrists and pin them down again this time above her head.
"Yeah, sure." I answer, looking at Holly, just inches away from her face.
"Thanks" I hear through the door.
I climb off Holly and slide to the side of the bed. She edges backwards towards the headboard and I hand her her other sock.
"Am I acting like that ashamed straight girl that everybody hates? I mean I don't feel that way at all, but I can't help but think my reactions to things are coming off that way, and I don't mean them to" I say picking at the bed covers. "It's just that..." Why am I saying all these words?
"Gail, I don't know where this is coming from, but I can assure you, you are definitely not acting like some ashamed straight girl." She laughs pulling on her sock.
"Why are you laughing?" I ask, strangely confused by her reaction.
"Well, I'm not sure you really know ashamed looks like. The stories I could tell you" she trails off. Another time perhaps? "Anyway, I know you. You don't do anything you don't want to do otherwise there would have been a Gail shaped hole through my door long ago." She points out. I love her sense of humor and I chuckle at the thought she has placed into my mind.
"You are just a bit nervous and unsure about your feelings, I get it, so am I. You don't want to have people judging your, don't freak out, relationship, before you even know you have one, it's the same for everyone don't you think? As for the secrecy thing? It doesn't bother me, besides its kind of hot. And don't be afraid to talk to me, okay? We tell each other stuff, right? Now hurry up and get dressed," she urges as she nudges me off the bed with her foot.
"See, it's so much easier when you explain my own feelings to me." I laugh and she winks back at me. Her ability to calm me a with a few sentences amazes me. If anyone else had done that I would have probably thrown a hissy fit, but I could listen to her talk all day. Even if it is about my stupid feelings.
I pick up my jeans off the floor and search for my sweater in my suitcase that is sitting on a chair nearby. "Holly, have you seen my sweater? It's a dark blue V-neck?" I say gesturing towards my neck as if she didn't know what a V-neck looks like.
She jumps off the bed and walks to her dresser and pulls out a green blazer, turns and offers it to me.
"What, no fleece?" I giggle. She cocks her head and scowls at me. "Anyway, I thought you said you wouldn't share your things with me?"
She takes a few steps closer to me urging me to take it from her. "No, if I remember correctly I was referring to you and your things. Not my style, remember?" I remember. I take the blazer from her hand.
"You on the other hand can pull off anything." She says as she steps and turns back towards her dresser. She looks at herself in the mirror, and glances back at me, still standing there, through the reflection of the mirror. "I have a lovely light brown paper bag if you'd prefer?"
She moves her glance back to her face and pulls her hair back into a ponytail then leans on the dresser with both hands. "Look at me, I'm a mess."
"That couldn't be further from the truth," I say walking backwards towards the bathroom. "You know someday Holly..." her eyes fix on me once again, "I am going to get you into my pants, whether you like it or not." I say with a wicked grin and close the bathroom door behind me.
