Author Notes: I apologize to everyone, who has been waiting for the next update of this story for quite some time now.*bows* Between a few things, which came up in RL and my obsession for HP, I just didn`t find the time to write the next chapter of this story, until now.*sighs*
I hope that you will still enjoy this chapter, although it`s been a while since the last update.
Appreciation: My special thanks to YenGirl, who beta-read this chapter in record time, although she was also busy with other things.*hugs* Thank you, dear, for taking the time to improve this chapter significantly.*big hug*
Hopeless Wish
The fast approaching twilight announced the start of the night.
Zero had always loved this time of day, when the sun sank in the west and the stars appeared in the sky, when the world slowly became darker with each passing minute.
It was rather ironic that a vampire hunter would prefer the setting of the sun to its rising, since their natural enemies, the vampires, rose with the dusk. Nevertheless, Zero had never enjoyed the sight of the rising sun, when the red ball covered the land in bright, blinding colors. Even when he was human, he had preferred twilight to dawn.
Maybe, he thought as he leaned against the balustrade of his balcony, it was because he had never liked getting up in the morning… or maybe it was because he was destined to fall in love with two purebloods at the same time.
And not only purebloods, but siblings to boot.
Zero sighed. He couldn't deny it any longer; he was in love with Kaname and with Yuki.
The young hunter shook his head as the faces of both of his lovers appeared in his mind's eye - Yuki's sweet face as she smiled up at him, and the dark eyes of Kaname as the young pureblood prince looked at him trustingly.
Damn! Zero struck the balustrade with his bare hand.
It had been complicated enough when he was only with Kaname, but… his heart hurt every time he thought of pushing Yuki away. After finally admitting to himself what he felt for her, it would be like cutting away a part of his heart if he stayed away from her now.
Nevertheless, Zero clenched his fists, it was also possible that Yuki wouldn't want to see him anymore, whereas with Kaname, Zero was sure of seeing the young pureblood as often as possible.
It had been only three days since he had last seen Yuki, but she hadn't tried contacting him after they had shared those few passionate hours when she visited him the last time. Maybe she regretted having slept with him.
That would be a good thing, Zero tried telling himself even as his heart clenched painfully in his chest. He had already taken a part of Kaname's heart away from her. How could he go one step further and take a part of Yuki's heart away from her brother as well?
Violet orbs stared up at the cold and distant moon, which looked indifferently down at him. Sometimes, he wondered if it wouldn't be better to just go away and start a new life somewhere else, so that Yuki and Kaname could at least be happy together.
After all, Zero was likely nothing more than a source of irritation for them. Of course, he knew that they both cared deeply for him, but he still couldn't get rid of the idea that they would be far better off without him.
This pessimistic way of thinking was probably a consequence of how Zero had felt in his younger years after he had been turned into a vampire and fought against his changed nature. He just couldn`t wrap his head around the idea that Yuki and Kaname wouldn't be able to go on with their lives without him. It seemed… impossible when they already had each other…
Zero's dark thoughts were interrupted by the shrill ringing of his cell phone. With an impatient sigh, he answered the call.
Two minutes later, he sported a heavy frown as he opened his wardrobe. Either the leader of the hunter organization was utterly useless or his colleagues were so incompetent that they had to call him in for such a simple mission.
Zero threw the necessary clothes on his bed and shrugged as he went to take a shower. At least, this mission would give him a break from his depressing thoughts.
OOO
He was such an idiot!
Zero slapped himself inwardly. So much for wanting to escape his troubled thoughts for at least one evening – why didn't he take into consideration that they would also be here?
A bitter smile spread over his face as he stared down at his glass of champagne. The organization had given him the simple task of overseeing a soiree of vampires and without even thinking, he had agreed.
Most of the bloodsuckers didn't even glance in his direction; they were so used to the presence of a vampire hunter at larger celebrations by now. Zero wasn't of any more interest than the potted palms placed in every corner of the ballroom for most of them… but not all.
Zero gulped. He had felt their presence the moment he entered the ballroom. Again, he cursed himself for overlooking the fact that the two Kuran siblings would of course be invited to this soiree as well.
Against his better knowledge, he looked up when he felt someone's eyes on him and met a pair of light brown eyes. He saw Yuki's lips turn upwards briefly before her expression smoothed out again.
At the same time, a pair of dark orbs searched Zero's face. Kaname's expression didn't give anything away, but the young hunter still felt a wave of warmth moving through his blood as Kaname nudged him gently through their bond.
Taking a sip of his champagne, Zero forced his gaze to wander over the other guests so as not to arouse any suspicions.
Just then, the orchestra started playing a slow waltz. The males bowed in front of their chosen female companions and moved onto the dance floor. As if drawn by a special cruel power, Zero's eyes returned to Yuki and Kaname.
The young pureblood prince held his sister in a light embrace, their bodies much closer to each other than was actually correct for this sort of dance. It wasn't their proximity that made Zero's insides freeze though, but the look the siblings directed at each other.
Yuki's eyes were aglow with happiness, her lips slightly parted and her cheeks flushed as she looked up at her older brother. Kaname was smiling tenderly at her as they moved in perfect harmony with the music.
The skirt of Yuki's white dress floated around her legs as they danced in slow circles, looking as if they were in their own private world, a world that Zero didn't belong in. Gulping down the bitterness of that thought, he turned his back on the happy couple and went to one of the private balconies lining the ballroom.
OOO
The music ended.
Like a perfect gentleman, Kaname took Yuki's arm and led her from the dance floor just as a group of nobles started moving into their direction. It was obvious they wanted to approach the two purebloods, but one glare from Kaname was enough to make them step back.
Kaname sighed inwardly. If he ever forgot why he hated such soirees so much, these impertinent vampires would always make sure that he remembered the reasons again – the nobles only wanted to kiss up to him.
Nevertheless, Kaname knew that he wouldn't be able to avoid them all night long. He had to deal with them sooner or later, but right now, he wanted to spend a few quiet moments with his little sister.
Signaling one of the waiters, he took two glasses of wine from the tray and gave one to Yuki.
"The wine is truly delicious."
The beautiful smile Yuki directed at him as she took a sip of the bordeaux colored liquid was almost enough to outweigh the terrible soiree.
"Aido-dono has very expensive taste in wine."
Yuki chuckled quietly at Kaname's words and took another sip of her wine.
"At least we now know where Hanabusa got his expensive taste from."
Kaname nodded but didn't touch the wine. He could tolerate more alcohol than most humans, but he didn't like the idea of giving up even one percent of his control while being surrounded by the different levels of vampires, all with varying interests.
Kaname also wasn't blind to how beautiful Yuki looked in her evening dress and how everyone else seemed to be staring at her as well. He sighed.
"I'm sorry, Yuki, that you had to give up your get-together with Yori for this," he gestured to the whole room.
OOO
Smiling, Yuki shrugged.
It was true; she had been very disappointed when Kaname had asked her to accompany him to this soiree, instead of going out with her best friend.
Of course, her brother would never force her to do anything she didn't want, but it went without saying that she wouldn't leave Kaname alone with all these sycophants. She didn't like the presence of the other vampires, but there was one person who made her heart speed up.
Zero was here!
Yuki had felt his presence the instant the young hunter entered the room. Her eyes wandered to the balcony where Zero had disappeared to and made a quick decision.
"I'm going to step outside for a bit of fresh air," she announced, indicating the curtained balcony.
"Yes, you do that, Yuki." Kaname nodded his approval and received a kiss from his little sister in return before she made her way to the balcony.
The young pureblood princess only hesitated for a moment, before she stepped outside and leaned against the wall, right next to the French windows. No one inside could see her now and in return, she had a wonderful view of the young hunter who stood with his back to her, both arms leaning on the balustrade.
Brown eyes took in every detail. The light breeze blew Zero's hair, which looked like woven silver in the light of the moon and his earrings glistened in the silvery light. Both were a stark contrast to the perfectly fitting suit, which revealed just how well built the young hunter was.
"How long do you intend to stand there?"
Startled, Yuki looked up and caught Zero's serious gaze. She had been so absorbed in her examination that she hadn't noticed that Zero was aware of her presence.
"You know, it's dangerous to be so careless around a vampire hunter. Someone else might have killed you already."
Yuki shrugged and shook her head.
"But I trust you, Zero. I know you would never hurt me."
She was surprised when he flinched at her words.
"Zero, are you okay?"
OOO
No! Everything in Zero wanted to scream that one word as an answer to Yuki's question.
Nothing was alright! How could it be?
How could he be all right when Yuki was so close to him?
The unique fragrance of the young pureblood princess, which always reminded him of wild flowers on a sunny afternoon, flooded his senses with every breath the young hunter took. Yuki was so close and Zero had to clench his fists at his sides, in order to stop himself from taking Yuki into his arms and never letting her go.
But how could he do that when she trusted him that much?
Zero took a step back and shook off the hand Yuki had reached out towards him.
"Zero, are you truly okay? Did I do something wrong?"
Zero looked up and immediately wished he hadn't done so. Large brown orbs looked at him, so full of hurt that a person could drown in them… and it was all because of him.
Zero bit his lower lip. It was his fault that Yuki felt like this now. If only he had been stronger when she came to visit him that afternoon, nothing would have happened in the first place and he wouldn't feel the urge to embrace her and hold her until all the pain he had caused was gone.
Violet orbs flicked towards the entrance to the ballroom. He doubted that the vampires would let him get away with taking their precious pureblood princess into his arms. They might even think that he was about to harm her and Zero doubted if even Kaname was able to help him if that happened.
Kaname… his lover who was surrounded by those bloodsuckers right now and probably even knew that his little sister and fiancé was talking to his lover at the very moment.
But without knowing that his lover had also slept with his fiancé and made her his lover as well, Zero reminded himself with an inward groan.
No, he couldn't continue his relationship with Yuki. Having made up his mind, he turned his back on her and was about to go back inside as a hand closed around his wrist.
"No, Zero, I won't allow you to go like this, without telling me first what's going on!"
The young hunter frowned as he glanced down at the slender pale hand on his wrist. Yuki was much stronger than she had been before, he noted. Nevertheless, the determined look in her eyes and the way her lips were pressed together still reminded him of the time a few years back when she had tried to convince him that he had to treat her to a sundae.
Of course, the situation now was much too serious for such comparisons. Zero shook his head in frustration.
"Christ, Yuki, we can't go on like this… its wrong!"
Desperately Yuki shook her head. "No, we can… I mean, Kaname wouldn't harm us, even if he found out about it."
Zero saw that even Yuki herself noticed that her last words sounded more like a desperate excuse than like a real argument. He didn't doubt the truth behind her words. He knew very well that Kaname would never hurt either of them, but still…
"He might not harm you or me, but… what about him? Wouldn't your brother be hurt if he found out what we had done?"
OOO
Brown eyes widened in surprise as Yuki gasped.
She would never have expected Zero to waste even a single thought on the wellbeing of her brother. She had always assumed that Zero hated him, but the hunter was obviously much more sensitive than… she herself was.
Hot shame welled up in Yuki as she realized that she hadn't even thought about how Kaname would feel about such a betrayal.
"Yes. He would be hurt," she admitted quietly. How could she not think of her brother first?
She loved Kaname and her heart screamed at her that she should go back inside… back to her brother, then man she loved. But it was only one part of her heart that was drawn to Kaname, the other part of her heart was urging her to fall into Zero's arms right now and never let him go.
Yuki took a deep breath. Why had everything to be so damn complicated?
She didn't want to hurt anyone, but in the end, it seemed impossible to do so.
In the silence that followed, the sounds of another waltz reached them on the balcony. Before she could make up her mind on what to do, Zero reached towards her and drew her closer to him. A small smile lit up her face as she allowed Zero to lead her to the slow rhythm of the music.
Her heart ached and rejoiced at the same time as they moved together, hidden from the eyes of the other vampires by the wall of the house, witnessed only by the silent moon.
The poignant dance ended much too soon for Yuki's liking and she feared that Zero would wish her farewell forever as he let go of her. It would be the right decision, she tried to convince herself.
Then she felt warm breath next to her ear.
"Tomorrow, at eight pm, at the 'Inner City' bus station."
Yuki's eyes widened, but she found herself nodding without hesitation.
"You should go inside now before someone gets suspicious."
The young pureblood princess only directed a smile at the young hunter before she left the balcony and went back inside.
OOO
Zero sighed as Yuki left him. He had sworn to himself that he wouldn't repeat what happened with Yuki that day and now… he had invited her on a date.
A resigned smile passed over Zero's features. He had just made sure that he would see her again… and he probably wouldn't just see her. His whole being longed to hold Yuki, to feel her warmth against his body and to…
A pair of dark, sad eyes appeared in Zero's mind's eye as he imagined how Kaname would feel if the young pureblood ever found out about this betrayal.
No. Zero glared at the wall next to him.
Kaname didn't have to learn about this. It would hurt him and Zero didn't want to hurt the gentle young pureblood. He only wanted to be with the person he loved.
It was just his luck that he loved both the Kuran siblings more than anyone else. That meant that he would always hurt someone. If not Yuki or Kaname, then it would be himself.
It was a vicious circle.
A bitter laugh escaped past Zero's lips and floated away into the night, mixed with the fading sounds of a love song.
Life was so ironic.
