Switching back to Jasper to find out how he's handling what happened to Edward, and needless to say, it isn't pretty. And I know we're not happy with Carlisle, but it's a work in progress.
Thanks for all the alerts, favs and reviews, cause good or bad, they all make me smile.
I don't own Twilight. But I do own all the books, so that means I get to screw with the whole world.
This is also un-beta'd, so any lingering mistakes are all mine.
Survival Instincts
To say that I'm furious with Carlisle for his method of not only getting me out of his way but also manipulating Edward into doing his bidding is not quite enough to express how completely incensed I became when I realized what was happening.
As soon as Esme came to me after I stormed out of the dining room, I knew something wasn't right. I obviously hadn't expected her to overpower me so quickly, but I'd been so angry with Carlisle that it had obviously been easy for her to gain enough of my trust for her ability to work.
Now that Edward is gone with Bella, it has all become too clear to me.
Alice knew we were coming. She told Carlisle of our arrival, and from then, he planned to use us in his quest against Aro. I have been merely a chess piece for him to move around as he pleases, and now Edward and Bella have been captured by Demetri and Felix.
I don't know what infuriates me more — being used or knowing that Carlisle meant to put Edward in Aro's path this entire time. And more than that, I'm now terrified that I might never see Edward or Bella again. She is completely innocent in all of this, and Carlisle used her like her life doesn't even matter. And Edward will do anything he can to keep her safe, even if it means putting his own life in danger.
This couldn't feel any more like the worst mistake of my life than it already does.
"Everything will be all right, Jasper," Esme says as she sits with me in the room that was meant for me, Edward and Bella. "Aro won't hurt Edward. He won't hurt Bella. They're too unique."
I know she's staying with me only because I won't let any of the others near me. Emmett and Rosalie have steered clear of me, and with good reason. Almost as soon as I woke to the knowledge that I'd been tricked and lied to, I'd taken out almost all of my anger out on Alice. I knew from her anxiety that something had been wrong, and the fear in her eyes had only been exacerbated by the way she kept telling me to stay calm. It seemed in my awakening that I had begun to project the strongest of my emotions onto all those around me. And when I could not feel Edward or Bella anywhere nearby, Alice had been the only thing standing in my way to find them.
That is, until Carlisle stopped me from ripping her heart out.
He'd used my own ability against me, crippling me with even more fear, but it had been for my own life by his hands.
Several hours have passed.
Edward is gone. Bella is gone.
And I have no one to blame but myself.
"Have you calmed down?"
Carlisle's voice grates on my nerves, and when I look at him, I cannot hide my new feelings toward him.
"I hate you."
This doesn't phase him in the slightest. He steps closer slowly, obviously aware that I'm still angry with him but not caring at all. In an attempt to comfort me, Esme still rubs my back and holds my hand. I'm only allowing her to stay close because I couldn't hurt her even if a strange force overcame me and tried to coerce me into it. I'm already sorry for harming Alice. Of all the vampires I know, they are the most gentle and the most innocent.
Carlisle nods for her to leave, and after giving me a pleading look in her eyes, she obeys. Once it's just the two of us, he kneels in front of me, but he makes no moves to comfort me.
"This was necessary, Jasper," he says softly, almost as an apology.
It's not good enough.
"I know where Edward and Bella have been taken," he adds.
This warrants my attention, and the moment he has it, a deep sigh passes his lips. "It's true. I knew you were coming. I knew Bella would be with you, and I used you to do this. And I know it's not enough, but causing you this pain was worth having the ability to take Aro down. I told you, he's been in power for too long. He punishes those who do not deserve punishing, and no one questions him because of his power. When I found Tanya, I discovered a vampire who had the ability to resist him."
"Where are they?" I ask, ignoring everything else he's just said.
Another deep sigh escapes. "For now, they'll be kept in one of the claiming rooms. While Aro observes them. He won't harm them. I know from Edward's memories that Aro was too intrigued be his ability to cause him any suffering. And I saw deeper into Bella's mind than Edward was able. I know how she's survived all this time, Jasper. Aro won't be able to harm her, no matter what he shows Edward to coax his submission."
"How do you know that?" I ask with a shake of my head.
"It's because Bella isn't the one who killed her parents," he reveals. "Her ability isn't what killed them. They were already dead when her fire manifested. But it's been more than two hundred years since that happened. Her memories are so much more jumbled than they should be. That's why I wanted to touch her, Jasper. I can help her control her ability. Right now, it's her survival method. It's how she protects herself and pushes away those she doesn't trust. I never wanted to harm her. Now, Aro will try to turn her into a weapon. And I don't know what he'll do to Edward once that's been done."
"Then why did you do this?" I yell. I rise from where I'm sitting to tower over him, and after a few seconds, he follows me. "I should've left as soon as I realized you were here! Perhaps they would've found us, perhaps they wouldn't have, but this is why I left you! You care for no one but yourself and your crusade, and now, it's cost me the one person in this life that I cannot live without! And you've put an innocent girl in the path of a power-hungry, manipulative mad man! You had no right to do this."
"I will not ask permission to use whatever means I must to make Aro suffer for all the atrocities he's forced on us!" Carlisle bellows. "I did this for you and Edward as much as I've done it for myself and everyone close to me."
"And what about Bella?" I demand. "Does she figure into your wondrous, beautiful future where vampires can run amuck and do as they please when you know it's Aro who's kept our numbers in check? Have you thought of her life in any of this?"
He backs away from me in a way that tells me he wasn't expecting me to care for a human more than members of my own species. But then his expression changes, as does his posture, and he regains control just as quickly as he lost it. "We're leaving for Tanya's coven as soon as possible," he commands. "It's a long run, and once we're with her, the journey to Volterra will take several days. If you want your mate back, you'll put your distaste for my methods aside and help us."
Watching him leave the room is enough to ignite my anger again, and I grab the first thing I find as a vase of flowers decorates the bedside table. I hurl it at the door with all my strength, shattering it to a million tiny pieces and leaving a dent in the wooden door.
He has no right to make demands of me. I have not lost my free will simply because he decided to perform a hasty bonding ceremony. Edward is my mate! And Bella is my responsibility!
This is when I know he's right.
I want my mate back, and I want Bella safe again.
Therefore, I must help him. It's the only way I'll get them back.
I'm alone for less than ten minutes when someone else knocks on the door. I can do nothing to hide my surprise when Alice steps through. The abrasions on her neck have disappeared, and her color has returned from being drained of nearly all her blood when I attacked her. My shame is impossible to deny, but her behavior makes it worse as she moves closer to me and sits where I've settled on the bed.
"I know you didn't mean to hurt me," she says softly. Then she lays her hand over my cheek. "After everything that's happened since we've met, I should've known better than to keep this from you. I'm sorry."
Gently, I lay my hand over hers, easing just a few centimeters closer to her and laying my forehead over hers. "I should not have taken my anger out on you. But this was not the way to gain my trust. Carlisle knew that, and he didn't care. Alice," I whisper, "you have to swear to me that if you see something happening to Edward or Bella, you'll tell me. Please."
She enfolds me in her arms and presses the side of her face to mine. "I'll keep my eyes on them as often as I can spare them," she promises.
Though these words do little to soothe me, I know she's being as honest with me as she knows how to be. Because she's Carlisle's mate, she'll be more inclined to follow his orders. But she's my friend, and I have to trust that after experiencing my anguish, she'll remember that the ones he's put in danger are more important to me and my survival than hers.
Her soft words work in keeping me calm, and together, we leave the room to join the rest of . . . our coven as they prepare to leave the apartment, and the town, quite possibly forever. Emmett and Rosalie are packing supplies into two large rucksacks, and Esme is helping Carlisle wrap a small box in plain brown paper.
They all look up when Alice steps into the room with me, but none of them say anything. I don't know if they have expected me to come around all this time, or if Carlisle has merely told them to accept my anger as a normal reaction to what he's done — and therefore to ignore all of my outbursts. Either way, they simply carry on in their activities, and Alice nudges me toward a table where other small boxes are waiting to be wrapped.
We all work quietly until I realize they're wrapping boxes filled with gold coins, valuable stones and expensive belongings from the apartment for the town around them. This seems useless to me, but when Carlisle senses my confusion, he speaks as amiably as possible.
"These people have been kind to us, Jasper," he says as he wraps another box. "And we owe them our gratitude. This is only a small thing we can do for them now that we won't be here with them. Once we're gone, they'll have to find another doctor, and the last thing I want is for any humans to suffer because of our absence."
His words surprise me, but considering he has a home here and probably wants to come back at some point, it makes sense that he would want to do what he can for the humans he's leaving behind. I only wish he'd shown that much consideration where Edward and Bella are concerned.
"Jasper," Carlisle says softly. "I'm doing this for all of us. Vampires like us and humans like Bella. I admit my methods weren't the best, but the more of us there are, the easier it will be to fight Aro. He's controlled us for too long, and I'm not doing this so all vampires will be able to kill humans and create newborns unchecked. But for you and Edward, Aro's ways must be stopped. And I fully intend to get Edward and Bella back."
"How?" I plead.
"Aro has guards," he reminds me. "But so do I. It's been many years since I've seen her, but she'll help us. The sooner we leave, the more quickly we'll reach Volterra. Until we make it there, she'll keep Edward and Bella safe."
Rosalie and Emmett close the rucksacks, and with a glance in my direction, they leave the apartment. I don't have to ask where they're going. In my unconsciousness, I know Carlisle has used all of the supplies Edward purchased at the hardware store. We'll leave most of the furniture at the house for when we return to the area, but it could be many years before that occurs.
It is again the middle of the night, and though I know this means that Edward and Bella have been gone for nearly a day, it also means we can make a clean break from the townspeople. If we waited until first light, it would be more easily seen that Carlisle has gone. The clouds seem to have remained, but it doesn't make me feel any more comfortable about traveling during the day.
So we're leaving now.
As soon as all the boxes are wrapped, Alice instructs me on where to leave them while Esme and Carlisle pack another set of supplies. While I've been out of their way, they've healed and released their humans, knowing they will not need to feed again until they're in the north country with Tanya's coven. So much has happened without my participation, and I feel useless even as I delivery the few boxes in my possession to their destinations.
When Edward disappeared from the safety of a local Indian tribe nearby, they informed Carlisle immediately. I know now that the werewolves protect them, and I know Carlisle has forged a protective agreement with them. This very thing is more unheard of than anything I've ever known, and I can't decide whether I should be terrified or expectant of his activities. He always did know how to keep everyone around him in the dark about what he was doing until he wanted them to know.
Carlisle and Esme meet me and Alice on the north side of town when we've finished our deliveries, and together, we walk the ten miles from there to the house where several of the apartments' contents now occupy the rooms that have been renovated. Rosalie and Emmett are waiting, and after Alice and I are given rucksacks of our own, we all leave the area, running as quickly as we can toward the northern most isolated area of the Alaskan territory. I know it's incorporation as a territory is still new, but it's also apparently very well hidden.
This has apparently worked to Tanya's advantage.
I can't think about Edward as I run. While I'm surrounded by Carlisle, Alice and everyone else, I have to focus on getting one foot in front of the other. The night covers us until we're halfway there, and we have to stop in an abandoned house for shelter while we wait for nightfall again. In my mind, I know our destination should only be less than twenty hours from our previous location. But stopping slows us down. I don't share space with Alice or Esme while we wait. For Edward and Bella, I won't keep anyone's company but theirs.
When we resume our journey, Carlisle again leads us through the wilderness. I carry the supplies on my back with my head down and my emotions in check. I'm worried but not so much anymore that it cripples me. I've had time to make it work to my advantage, and the cold barely bothers me. The farther north we run, the more animals scatter from our path. There are fewer people near our trail until it becomes obvious that the only way Tanya and her coven could survive would be by the blood of families who will eventually realize what's happening around them. This makes no sense to me.
Everything will be explained when we arrive.
Carlisle's voice in my head startles me, especially because Edward has never done it before. But I don't reply back. I simply keep running.
We arrive in the vicinity of Tanya's coven when I notice the clouded sky brightening with the coming of dawn, and it's within a minute of this that Carlisle stops under the dense canopy of the trees without so much as a warning. Rosalie and Emmett flank me and Alice as Esme steps up to Carlisle's side.
"Don't move," he orders. "It will only take a moment for her to realize we're here."
For some reason, I don't know if he means this literally or if it's merely a statement of fact, but less than a minute after we all stop, twigs and rocks around us crunch under the weight of heavily heeled shoes. My instincts tell me to protect myself and the one closest to me, so when Alice's hand finds mine, I don't refuse it. After a few seconds, I step closer to her in anticipation of the supposed arrival of Tanya and her coven.
"You've increased your numbers, Carlisle," a notably feminine, smoky voice calls from the brush.
"With the means to add two more," he replies, glancing at me.
Slowly, a petite woman with wavy, red-tinted blond hair appears from behind a wide tree trunk. At first, I'm surprised at how slight she is. How could Aro ever be frightened of someone so small? But the command in her fierce blue eyes is obvious, and as she makes her way to where we've stopped, those eyes find me and literally size me up in a matter of seconds.
"And he's a handsome one for sure," she says with a coy smile on her face. Her scrutiny lasts only long enough for her to arrive in front of Carlisle, and then her attention shifts. "I wasn't expecting you so soon. Something must have happened."
"Among other things, the plan we discussed is close to its starting point," Carlisle explains. "But before we do that, I have to ask a favor of you and your coven. As a service to me and my coven."
The way he says all of this shouldn't cause such a stir inside my body, but it does, and in anticipation, Alice squeezes my hand, willing me to remain calm through this formality between the two coven leaders. Something in Tanya's eyes tells me that while she wasn't expecting us so soon, she knew that Carlisle would eventually come to her needing this kind of help.
"Carlisle," she says, and it sounds interestingly like she's chastising a small child. "What have you done now?"
Again, he glances at me, and it's easier to feel his shame than it has been since I came out of unconsciousness and attacked Alice. "It's for Jasper that we need extra eyes and hands to retrieve his mate and a young girl who came into their charge no less than four days ago. And I admit it was mostly my doing that caused this. It was necessary to provoke Aro's fear, and I don't want anything to happen them."
Tanya's eyes land on me, and I have to look away. Despite Carlisle taking most of the blame for this, I still feel like I could've prevented this by simply leaving the moment I realized that Carlisle was so close to me. If I'd just left . . .
"You have been busy," Tanya says, but I don't look at her.
It's quiet for a minute or two, and new footsteps make themselves known as two more members of Tanya's coven.
"Come with us," Tanya orders, leading the way as the others trail us to move away from our hasty stopping point.
A little intrigued to meet Tanya's coven? I'm sure we can all guess who's in her coven, especially given who's with Carlisle.
The next few chapters might be spaced a little ways apart. As shitty as it sounds, RL is being a bitch, and the writing is not going well. But never fear, I will finish this story.
Till next time!
